Do you have trouble coming up with a witty retort? Are you a disgusting, rotting, fetid piece of congealed monkey vomit? Or even a putrid, amphibious gill-breather with less brains than a mollusc? Do you like it when they say ‘smeg’? Then have a look at The Insult List – an utterly comprehensive list of all the put-downs and criticisms used in the 52 episodes of Red Dwarf. Go on, don’t be a neurotic, under-achieving emotional retard!