Ian’s Newsround – 05/03/04

Sneaking on the internet. No time to explain. Intelligence compressed. Reduced lifespan. Two point three five remaining. Et cetra. Anyway, the big news this week is the new batch of interviews for the DVDs, which were recorded on Tuesday and Wednesday last week. Juliet May! I had wondered whether or not she’d be involved, and I’m delighted that we’ll finally be told the story of exactly what happened there, with a mixture of talking and laughing. We’re talking mega ecstacy bliss. Both the producer and director of VI (Justin Judd and Andy DeEmmony) have been interviewed, but there’s no Hilary Bevan-Jones, who was the producer for V. Mind you, she sounds a bit posh. Oh, and no sign of one of the directors, either. Perhaps they could interview Rob Grant, who has gone on record as saying he’d like to contribute to the DVDs, on the same day as Doug Naylor? That’d be fun.

Some miscellaneous notes: Peter Wragg has been replaced with Mike Tucker, who has also provided a documentary and a commentary. Well, we only really need one VisFX chap, so you might as well have the same on throughout. Plus, Peter Wragg speaks as though he’s got a blocked nose. Incidentally, have a look at the credits of Back To Reality – Mike Tucker is miscredited as Mike Turner. Idiots. That spoils the episode for me. A brace of guest stars have been interviewed – Jack “Inquisitor” Docherty and Steven “GELF Bride” Wickham, as all their mates call them. Let’s hope Jack has got as good a memory as his Absolutely co-star Gordon “Hudzen” Kennedy, which is his name. Doug Naylor is not currently in the UK. Is he searching the planet for movie studios, or just on holiday? You decide. Oh, I’ve just realised that I’ve not mentioned Kerry Waddell. So, well done her. And finally, Andrew Ellard is wearing the same “lucky” shirt that he’s worn for all the interviews. The big tramp.

Also on TOS this week, an interview with Forbes Masson, who played Stan Laurel in Meltdown. That man can take off his hat, cry and scratch his head like no other. He was also in The High Life, which I’m told is rather good. I hadn’t noticed that in the deleted scene of Stan Laurel’s death, he shoots himself by holding his gun backwards. The probable reason for its deletion, there. Note to penguin understudies: it’s “Eddie Izzard”, not “Eddy”.

And finally, the Series IV DVD is out in Australia next Wednesday. So, grab a tinny, put another shrimp on the barbie, give a wibble on your wobble board, put on your favourite hat with corks dangling off it, prepare a vegemite sandwich, hail the Queen, say “G’day”, maltreat some Abbos, tie me kangaroo down, ban pooftahs, look at some pictures of Kylie, go to the surf shop, jam your thumb up a crocodile’s bumhole, have a game of “knifey-spoony”, descend from British convicts, turn Neighbours off, chunder, play a digeridoo, sing “Especially For You”, call someone a “double dag” and enjoy, Bruce!

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