I’ve never readthrough… a script

Pre-production on the two new series of Red Dwarf is most definitely underway, with cast and crew having convened in Pinewood Studios on Monday for the first script readthrough. Thanks to the fact that we’re living in the future, this crucial and fascinating first step has been well documented on the popular social media service Twitter. Three quarters of the cast and one half of the production companies involved posted photos, which you’ve probably all seen by now. But there are some intriguing details that you may have missed. Let’s indulge ourselves…

Firstly, this picture from Robert reveals the names of some of the crew members present:

So Richard Naylor, Linda Glover and Ed Moore are all back, which isn’t a surprise. You can also glimpse the flowing grey locks of documentarian Nathan Cubitt in the top left of frame, standing behind Doug. This suggests that proceedings were being filmed, which hopefully means we’ll be getting the customary DVD and/or online behind-the-scenes coverage. Matt Bell is a name that’s new to Red Dwarf as far as we can tell, but luckily one of Craig Funkandsoul’s photos shows that particular place-setting a little more clearly:

It’s still hard to make out, but if you zoom right in you can just about see that he’s the 1st Assistant Director. Presumably then, it’s this guy, who’s followed on Twitter by Doug, Richard and DoP Ed Moore. Nothing like a bit of friendly stalking to welcome someone to the team, eh? Also, what’s that stack of full colour printouts underneath Robert’s name plate? Concept art for new set designs? Photos from location recces? Or just something Bobby brought in from home, probably related to electric cars or some shit? You decide.

Another minor thing to note is the wording of the caption to this amusing picture from Baby Cow:

A “script workshop”, rather than a “readthrough”? Probably nothing, but then there was also this bit of what seems to be knowing pedantry from Craig to Robert:

Could it be that the scripts are not yet in a state that’s considered ready for a proper readthrough, with the terminology being deliberately changed to reflect that? Or is it just that different people use different bits of jargon for the same thing, and that these occasions are always a collaborative exercise which naturally generates feedback from the production team that informs subsequent drafts anyway? Probably the latter.

But we’ve saved perhaps the most notable, and certainly the most alarming, details until last. For there are no less than four photos that show no less than three different cast members wearing what can only be described as Dibbley teeth.

“Oh Sh*t” indeed, Danny. Now, before we all start setting fire to things, there is a distinct possibility that they’re deliberately having us on here. It almost seems more likely that this is just the cast pissing about, rather than the cast tweeting massive spoilers whilst in the same room as all their bosses. Plus, a similar thing has happened before, and that all turned out to be for an app that we can barely remember six years on. However, it seems that some effort has gone into this – there’s a bloke behind Craig with a tape measure, which could suggest that they cast are trying out props that have been custom built… if indeed that bloke and his tape measure are related to what’s happening in the foreground, rather than having being captured in the middle of doing something else.

But the thing is, if you look closely at the three sets of teeth, they are all slightly different. The colours vary, which could be down to subtle differences in lighting and composition of the photos, but they do seem to match the actors’ own gnashers. The shapes of the teeth are also clearly non-uniform – Craig’s are rounder than the others, Danny’s are straighter, and Robert’s stick out the furthest, especially the ones on the outside. So it’s looking very likely that these have been made for a specific purpose. As well as an episode where everyone’s Kryten, will there also be an occasion on which everyone’s Duane (or three quarters of them are, at least)? Because that didn’t go too well last time.

It’s worth bearing in mind that absolutely all of the above is based on very little, and we’ve been wrong hundreds of times before. Also, while many of us on G&T respond with great caution whenever the prospect of bringing back old characters is discussed, it’s worth noting that a lot of the reaction to the pictures on Twitter was that of excitement and positivity. It’s never a good idea to dismiss an idea before knowing how it’s going to be executed, but to be honest, the best thing I can bring myself to say is that at least they weren’t being unhygienic by sharing around the same set of salivia-drenched dentures.

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28 Responses to I’ve never readthrough… a script

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  1. I was worrying about the Dibbley teeth all yesterday afternoon (sad, but true). However after a short discussion on Twitter today, have also come to the conclusion that it’s just the cast farting about.
    Plus, it’s only the first fucking readthrough. Script Workshop. Whatever.

  2. The teeth are probably the ones from Series VIII. Hence why Chris doesn’t have any.

    Didn’t they take the piss by hinting about a Dibbley return during the filming of Series X?

  3. G&T Admin

    I was pondering whether they were from Back In The Red, but I can’t find any pictures or screengrabs that show conclusively whether they match the ones here. And we don’t know that Chris didn’t have any, just that he wasn’t pictured wearing any. I would much prefer it if this was just a gag, but I’m just weighing up the evidence.

  4. I don’t like the teeth thing! to clownish

  5. Hopefully the teeth is just an epic troll from Doug, as he seems very aware of the fans opinions of certain episodes.

  6. It’s like Carbug all over again…

  7. One would hope that, before embarking on the longest shoot Red Dwarf has ever had, Doug has got enough new story ideas to sustain 12 episodes and that each entry isn’t simply a reminder of a far superior episode in Red Dwarf’s past.

    One would hope.

  8. You’re a one.

    I can only assume that if it IS, as they call it, a script “workshop” – that it won’t be the Scrapheap Challenge style of workshop that involves cutting and shutting odd bits of old scripts together, firing old jokes at huge, easy targets until they hit randomly and accidentally.
    No, I’d assume it would be an artisan’s workshop, with experts working together, deliberately crafting, sculpting and shaping a brand new script into something new and beautiful.

    And then – for a laugh – they piss about with old Dibbley teeth. That they’ve still got in a drawer back from their drinking days.

  9. dd was before britpop which was people with greasy bowl cuts bad teeth and anoraks and also before austerity britain which is everyone carries sandwiches and bandages

  10. When I saw Linda Glovers head (before I noticed her name tag) I actually thought it was Hattie for a split second and thought they were actually gonna bring Holly back, even if it was for one episode. I can still dream.

  11. Same, Paddy, I just saw the blonde hair and flipped! xD It would be really nice to see Hattie back, especially if they’re about to produce 12 episodes. Surely there would be room for a Holly return somewhere??

  12. I would *LOVE* to see Hattie back, I think it’s unlikely though. :(

  13. Yeah I think Doug favours Normans holly, maybe because he feels he is easier to write for but the only way I see hattie returning is if doug feels he needs to bring holly back for an episode and Norman says no to coming back

    But Norman has already said he will return for a holly episode which I don’t like the idea of since Norman is putting his own needs before the shows needs and I worry that will come across as obvious in the writing

  14. “But Norman has already said he will return for a holly episode…”

    EH? What, where, when?!

  15. DJJ mentioned this in a short interview with Digital Spy:
    “Basically, it’s going back to have my teeth cast, and my head cast. I can’t tell you why I had to have my head cast, but you’ll be very pleased when you see it!”

    So you can be pretty sure that those Dibbley teeth aren’t new since he hasn’t had his teeth cast for the fangs yet.

  16. DJJ also mentioned in a short interview with Digital Spy:

    “It’s going back to the old school, the four guys and loads of banter. That’s what we want.”

    WAHEY BANTZ! *face*

  17. Can’t beat a bit of old school bantics.

    The Mystery of Taiwan Tony
    The Return of Taiwan Tony
    The Hand of Taiwan Tony
    Daughter of Taiwan Tony
    The Mask of Taiwan Tony
    The Bride of Taiwan Tony
    The Trail of Taiwan Tony
    President Taiwan Tony
    The Drums of Taiwan Tony
    The Island of Taiwan Tony
    The Shadow of Taiwan Tony
    Re-Enter: Taiwan Tony
    Emperor Taiwan Tony

  18. I can’t tell you why I had to have my head cast

    It’s because you’re going to be Kryten, Danny.

  19. it will be interesting to see if they all become kryten individually or if they’re all going to be modged together into one big glorious whole kryten

  20. and it remains to be seen who’ll be playing the role of danny’s head once he’s had it cast

  21. Great joke, Dollar Pound. Didn’t quite stick the landing but I like the spirit of it.

    Anyway, fuck Dwayne Dibbley and fuck his fucking teeth.

  22. thanks a lot for complimenting my joke. i messed up the landing deliberately so no one guesses i’m rob grant

  23. deliberately messed up the landing because i’m paul alexander

  24. I’m Cherokee Jack.

  25. Coffee? Yes. I like coffee.

    Anyway, I think the everyone-is-Kryten episode would be more interesting if it was more everyone-becomes-each-other. Like that scene from ‘the Young Ones’ where Rick is Vyvyan, Vyvyan is Mike, Mike is Neil and Neil is Rick. Except they keep changing it up. Would personally love to see Craig playing the Cat.

  26. everybody’s kryten on dave, on dave everybody’s kryten, kryten on daves everybody’s…

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