Jawscvmcdia’s Totally Fucking Pointless Questions Thread – Submit Your Own

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This topic contains 51 replies, has 20 voices, and was last updated by  flanl3 2 days, 7 hours ago.

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  • #224144

    Pete Part Three

    What if Chris Barrie had been cast as Lister? Would you still watch the show? What would that be like?

    #224145

    Pete Part Three

    What if Juliet May had stayed on to continue directing Series V? How do you think that would that affected how that series was received?

    #224146

    Pete Part Three

    What if pigeons had taken over the world in 1989? How would that have affected Series III, do you think?

    #224147

    Jawscvmcdia

    Chris Barrie actually auditioned for the part of Lister before the original run in 1987.

    #224149

    Jonathan Capps

    G&T Admin

    Amazing.

    #224150

    bloodteller

    What if the Cat was played by an actual cat? How would that have affected the reception of the show, do you think?

    #224155

    Kris Carter

    What if Starbug had been used in Series II, and Blue Midget was the main craft in Series III onwards? Would it have affected the show dynamics?

    What if Series VII had been filmed in front of the audience? Would that have affected the timing of the jokes?

    What if the entire series had been shot on film? Would you buy a hi def Blu Ray?

    What if my gran had wheels? Would she be a wagon?

    What is your name?

    What is your quest?

    What is your favourite colour?

    #224157

    flanl3

    Why did you combine Jawscvmcdia into three separate posts though?

    #224158

    Ridley
    #224159

    flanl3

    What if Rob Grant had stayed with the show after series VI? How would this have affected the “Idea for an episode.” thread?

    #224163

    Taiwan Tony

    What if Christopher Lloyd was cast as Lister and also killed in a car crash. Would Rob Grant have left?

    Ah, I can’t quite do it.

    #224164

    cwickham

    What if Red Dwarf started at Pete Part Two?

    #224165

    flanl3

    What if Series I had been broadcast on a different day of the week?

    #224166

    Ben Saunders

    How do you think the show would have been different if Kryten (played by Robert Llewellyn) was a Yorkshire Terrier (played by Robert Llewellyn’s Yorkshire Terrier) ?

    #224170

    bloodteller

    What if Back in the Red was a single episode, but as a consequence Pete had to become a 3-parter and Krytie TV had to become a 2-parter? would VIII be better recieved?

    #224172

    Dave

    What if 1989 had started in 1987?

    #224174

    SoundableObject

    What if Doug Naylor invented the Fing-Longer?

    #224175

    flanl3

    What if the Enconium had come from 1997 instead of 1987?

    #224176

    Pete Part Three

    Daddy or chips?

    #224196

    Hamish

    Why?

    #224197

    Hamish

    What?

    #224198

    Hamish

    When?

    #224199

    bloodteller

    who am i

    #224205

    Darrell

    1. If Chris Barrie was a heron, would he have had a better worse experience of series VI and would series VII have been better worse with a heron as Rimmer?

    2. If Rob Grant and Doug Naylor were conjoined at birth and surgically separated in 1993, would we have got more less commentaries on The Bodysnatcher Collection?

    3. When I hit my willy why does it go big and cry and knock over my Pringles

    #224287

    Lily

    What if you took three separate episodes plots and combined them into one?

    #224288

    si

    What if you took three separate episodes plots and combined them into one?

    Emohawk: Polymorph II.

    #224289

    Jawscvmcdia

    What if John Hoare was cast as Arnold Rimmer in Series 13?

    #224291

    Jawscvmcdia

    Also:

    <img src=”http://www.ganymede-titan.info/about/images/genesis.jpg”

    #224292

    Jawscvmcdia

    #224296

    Ben Saunders

    I have seen that image before.
    Many moons ago.
    Where the fuck is it from?

    #224312

    Taiwan Tony

    Bless you for joining in.
    What is your age?

    #224321

    Jason aka Smeg4Brains

    What if Red Dwarf had plot holes?

    #224322

    Jason aka Smeg4Brains

    What if Ross hadn’t discovered his wife was a lesbian.

    #224643

    Taiwan Tony

    Bump

    #224647

    bloodteller

    what if jawscvmcdia had never asked any pointless questions on the G&T forum? how would that have impacted the site, do you think?

    #224650

    quinn_drummer

    What if Lister has succeeded in Timeslides and the next 27 years of Red Dwarf was simply Rimmer knocking around Red Dwarf on his own with nothing but Holly for company?

    #224653

    si

    What if series 2 of Happy Families had happened?

    #224657

    Taiwan Tony

    >What if series 2 of Happy Families had happened?

    Oh, boy, that would have been great probably.

    #224661

    Dave

    What if The Inquisitor had judged himself and found that travelling through time to judge people wasn’t a worthwhile use of his life?

    #224662

    Jawscvmcdia

    What if Red Dwarf had started on ITV instead of BBC TV?

    #224665

    flanl3

    What if all 1,169 people on Red Dwarf, as well as Holly, Frankenstein, and Kryten had all been Irene E?

    Could a lot of the tension between people in The End be explained by the stress of George’s death?

    Why does Cat use “Frankenstein” as an insult in Quarantine?

    What if they had gone to deep space in the twelfth century instead of the fifteenth?

    If Red Dwarf barely has the power to run two holograms, wouldn’t it take a damn lot of eneto run an entire Holoship?

    Wait, whoops, some of those were serious questions.

    #224701

    Dollar Pound

    what happens in skipper?

    #224702

    Hamish

    > what happens in skipper?

    Well…

    *dodges warning shot from Ian Syme’s with admin hat on*

    One more day damn it! Just one more day!

    #224707

    Dollar Pound

    i’m playing spoiler chicken

    #224708

    Dollar Pound

    because it’s the last one. that it’s doing my head in

    #224710

    International Debris

    It’s a reference to the Fawlty Towers episode The Kipper and the Corpse (in fact, Kryten manages to bodge in a line about ‘the skipper and the corpse’), in which the 9 year old Kochanski from Pete Par t1, in seek of a Wimto, finds her way through a spacetime rip as result of a Star Knot, and finds her way to the XII-era crew. Lister, seeing an opportunity to get with his love at last, reprises his rapey Series VIII role and commits acts which end up with Kryten, Cat and Rimmer condemning him to The Tank for the rest of his life. While down there, he find the dead body of Kill Crazy (who, after the end of VIII, murdered the other prisoners). After months alone, Lister ends up committing said acts to Kill Crazy’s dead body, not noticing – hilariously – that Kryten, Rimmer and Cat have come to visit him. It’s at this point that Kryten gives his ‘the skipper and the corpse’ line.

    Then The Inquisitor appears and shits in Lister’s mouth. Rimmer kicks him in the balls and runs off.

    #224719

    Dollar Pound

    thought so

    #224735

    Ben Saunders

    >Why does Cat use “Frankenstein” as an insult in Quarantine?

    …shit.

    #224751

    International Debris

    Having realised, at some point, that Lister IS Cloister, he realised that his whole religion is bollocks.

    #224754

    Ben Saunders

    To be fair he seemed to think it was all bollocks in The End, anyway

    Still a bit like saying “nice job, Jesus” to someone as a put-down, though

    #224758

    Dave

    Maybe he knows that there is another connotation of the name Frankenstein and is referring to that.

    So the “nice job, Jesus” analogy would work better if there happened to be a famous literary monster who was also called Jesus.

    #224769

    flanl3

    When I asked somebody else, they compared it to being a Catholic then calling someone “Madonna” as an insult/compliment in reference to the sex music star.

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