Jokes it took me fucking years to get

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This topic contains 29 replies, has 14 voices, and was last updated by  peas_and_corn 6 years, 11 months ago.

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  • #1923

    John Hoare

    G&T Admin

    HOLLY: Course, women would have to be banned from playing the cello.

    #124843

    Danny Stephenson

    G&T Admin

    oh yes, that one took me a while as well. There are more but can’t remember any at the moment off hand.

    #124848

    Seb Patrick

    I’m still not sure I fully get it…

    #124849

    Phil

    Right…as far as I’m aware it’s just a very vaguely inappropriate suggestion…I don’t think there’s a SPECIFIC image you’re supposed to have in mind…

    Correct me if I’m wrong. I always laughed at it, but, like the audience, I was probably laughing at the suggested idea more than any one particular humorous end.

    #124851

    Jonathan Capps

    G&T Admin

    Yeah, I always thought it was a suggestion that ladies wearing dresses or skirts shouldn’t be allowed to spread their legs too much to accommodate the extra wide cello. Or something.

    It’s really not all that funny when you think about. Just slightly arousing.

    #124854

    Tanya Jones

    G&T Admin

    WOMEN; WATCH YOUR MUFFS.

    #124855

    Phil

    See, I thought it was to do with the fact that women would not have a certain necessary appendage to play the new cello…

    #124857

    Jonathan Capps

    G&T Admin

    That’s… that’s an interesting conclusion.

    #124860

    Phil

    I thought that was the default conclusion! Does this make me some kind of porno man?

    #124861

    Andrew

    > I thought that was the default conclusion! Does this make me some kind of porno man?

    The short answer is “Yes”.

    The long answer is “Yeeeeesssssssssssssss”

    #124863

    John Hoare

    G&T Admin

    Yeah, I always thought it was a suggestion that ladies wearing dresses or skirts shouldn?t be allowed to spread their legs too much to accommodate the extra wide cello. Or something.

    THIS IS CORRECT.

    It?s really not all that funny when you think about. Just slightly arousing.

    It never made me laugh much at the time. But the other day, I saw a woman playing the cello on telly, and the joke came back into my head and made me giggle like an idiot, when confronted with the HARSH REALITY.

    #124864

    Phil

    Jesus Christ. Not only did I have a vague image, but I had a wrong, horrible, porno fake image.

    It’s really just that the legs are spread too wide? That’s kind of lame. I preferred it when it was a joke at the expense of the cockless.

    #124865

    Seb Patrick

    Oh, okay. That’s what I thought it was, but I never found it particularly funny, especially as it’s meant to be the punchline of the gag. I thought there was some deeper (or, in Phil’s case, LONGER and HARDER) meaning that I was missing.

    #124866

    John Hoare

    G&T Admin

    The reaction from the studio audience is a bit weird too, as I recall – slightly delayed, as you can tell that some people don’t get it.

    #124872

    TheLeen

    I understood the intended (?) joke, but still don’t get the deeper/longer/harder alternative meaning.

    #124875

    Andrew

    From the first novel: “The only drawback, as far as Holly could see, was that women would have to be banned from playing the cello unless they had birthing stirrups, or elected to play it side-saddle.”

    #124877

    Tanya Jones

    G&T Admin

    The joke’s rather sexist if you think about it too hard. I wish I hadn’t…

    #124878

    Ian Symes

    G&T Admin

    From the first novel: ?The only drawback, as far as Holly could see, was that women would have to be banned from playing the cello unless they had birthing stirrups, or elected to play it side-saddle.?

    The side-saddle thing is also mention in the Son of Clich? sketch about Sir Kevin Kevin Sir.

    #124897

    Jason aka Smeg4Brains

    I thought the joke would have been more sexual than that…maybe if it was done with a flute…

    #124901

    JohnnyW

    It’s pretty straight forward and not really sexist(?). It makes good reference to the face that it was frowned upon for a woman to ride horses the “normal way” (astride), way back when, because it was potentially arousing/”un-Lady like”, so side-saddle was invented by insecure men.

    #125015

    Andrew

    There is one line that I totally missed the larger meaning of. In Balance of Power, coming out of the flashback Lister is being teased by his mates and Yells “Leave it alone! Leave it!” And we come back to the present-day Lister who says “Alone.”

    Now I never, ever realised, until I did the Remastered text tracks, that this is supposed to be Lister finishing his own line across the millennia – and adding a little meaning on the way.

    Which, okay, makes me dumb. But it’s also a very odd Grant/Naylor line – quite arch in the structure without aiming at a laugh.

    #125016

    John Hoare

    G&T Admin

    I never got that either! I’m sure a lot of people don’t – the final “Leave it” sounds like the end of the sentence, so you’re not expecting him to finish anything off.

    #125017

    Tarka Dal

    YOU TWONK!

    #125018

    Phil

    I’m pretty sure I realized “…alone” finished his sentence the first time I heard it. Now can we forget my misunderstanding the cello joke?

    #125019

    Danny Stephenson

    G&T Admin

    > Now I never, ever realised, until I did the Remastered text tracks, that this is supposed to be Lister finishing his own line across the millennia – and adding a little meaning on the way.

    It’s a nice little piece of Grant/Naylor gold. I think that’s their try, in the earlier series of pushing boundaries in terms of how to tell a story. I did get that line eventually but it didn’t really sink in until i saw it a few times.

    #125020

    Danny Stephenson

    G&T Admin

    Something unrelated here with Monty Python (well it is in a way, in that after 1000’s of viewing you’re still finding things). In ‘The Holy Grail’ as the Knights rush toward the castle after the first french taunting. You can see Sir Lancelot attacking the castle with his sword. Never noticed him doing this. But the funniest part is when they “run away” he goes back for one last swipe at the wall before he retreats which had me in stitches….

    Sorry.

    Red Dwarf.

    Yes.

    #125028

    Ben Paddon

    It?s a nice little piece of Grant/Naylor gold. I think that?s their try, in the earlier series of pushing boundaries in terms of how to tell a story. I did get that line eventually but it didn?t really sink in until i saw it a few times.

    I seem to recall reading somewhere that Grant and Naylor had intended to feature similar scenes in later episodes, but it apparently didn’t happen.

    #125031

    Jason aka Smeg4Brains

    > You can see Sir Lancelot attacking the castle with his sword. Never noticed him doing this. But the funniest part is when they ?run away? he goes back for one last swipe at the wall before he retreats

    I have never noticed this…I will have to pay attention next time.

    > Now I never, ever realised, until I did the Remastered text tracks, that this is supposed to be Lister finishing his own line across the millennia – and adding a little meaning on the way.

    I always knew he was carrying his sentence on…this bit I didn’t get was that he is saying “Alone” and he is, of course, alone.

    #125032

    Phil

    I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve masturbated to a woman only to find out later it was John Cleese in drag.

    #125033

    peas_and_corn

    Well, it’s a relief to realise I’m not alone

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