Food Featurette Features Posted by Ian Symes on 4th November 2003, 00:00 Another disc, another musical featurette. This one, included on the Series III DVD, is set to I Got You (I Feel Good) by James Brown, a song which is familiar to everyone in the Western World, apart from John Hoare. Nobody is ever going to agree on these extras – you either love them, hate them or are indifferent to them. Time Episode/Foodstuff Lyrics Dialogue 0.00 Caption Wow! I feel good 0.06 Beyond A Joke – Lobster KRYTEN: Ta-da! 0.08 The Last Day – Chicken I knew that I would now 0.10 Timeslides – Sausage Sandwich I fe- GILBERT: A sausage and onion gravy sandwich. 0.12 Better Than Life – Dumplings -el good RIMMER: They were quite… superb. 0.14 Back In The Red (Part Two) – Muffin I knew that HOLLISTER: A blueberry muffin… 0.15 Backwards – Eclair I would now 0.18 Nanarchy – Biscuit So good 0.20 The Last Day – Waffles (from bin) So good, I got 0.22 The End – Petersen you LISTER: Pah! 0.23 Holoship – Curry Wow! 0.24 Demons and Angels – Strawberries I feel nice 0.28 Legion – Mimosian Banquet Like sugar and spice, I feel 0.33 Back to Reality – Calamari nice, like sugar and HOLLY: There’s enough fried calamari out there to feed the whole of Italy. 0.35 Confidence and Paranoia – Fish rain spice 0.38 Gunmen of the Apocalypse – raw coffee So nice 0.40 Pete (Part One) – Flours So nice, I got LISTER: Flour, flours. 0.42 Balance of Power – Cake you LISTER: Da-der! 0.44 Waiting For God – Roast Chicken RIMMER: Incredible! 0.48 Out Of Time – Chocolate Finger Display (1) KRYTEN: This will just not do. Kindly return to the galley and start again. 0.52 Psirens – chilled vindaloo sauce When I hold you 0.54 Me² – Gazpacho In my arms, I know that RIMMER 2: Oh, grow up, Mr. Gazpacho! 0.56 Pete (Part One) – Chicken Vindaloo I can’t do no wrong, And when LISTER: Oooh, chicken vindaloo! 0.59 Thanks For The Memory – Triple Fried Egg Butty I hold you in my arms 1.01 Demons and Angels – Low Strawberry My love won’t do you no harm, and I 1.05 Me² – Bubble Gum feel nice 1.08 Out Of Time – Chocolate Finger Display (2) Like sugar and spice, I feel LISTER: What d’you think of the picket fence? 1.12 Duct Soup – Tinned Peaches nice 1.13 Quarantine – Sprouts (1) Like sugar and spice RIMMER: Dinner tonight, gentlemen, will consist of sprout soup… 1.17 Body Swap – Bangers and Mash 1.18 Quarantine – Sprouts (2) So nice RIMMER: …followed by sprout salad… 1.19 Demons and Angels – Tarantula So nice 1.21 Quarantine – Sprouts (3) I got you RIMMER: …and for desert, I think you’ll like it, rather unusual, sprout crumble. 1.24 Tikka To Ride – Waffles CAT: That sound about as healthy as jumping off a cliff!KRYTEN: Healthy? Who cares? Pork away! 1.30 The End – Crispies 1.31 Marooned – Dog Food When I hold you 1.36 Tikka To Ride – Man (1) In my arms CAT: Chicken’s good! 1.38 Backwards – Boiled Egg I know that I can’t do 1.40 Pete (Part Two) – Cow Vindaloo no wrong, and 1.42 Tikka To Ride – Man (2) when I hold you, My love won’t do you no KRYTEN: That’s not chicken, sir.CAT: What is it?KRYTEN: It’s that man we found. 1.47 Balance of Power – Chef’s Exam harm, And I fe- LISTER: Argh! 1.47 Out of Time – Hogwash -el nice FUTURE RIMMER: Haven’t you got anything better than this hogwash? We’re used to the best. 1.50 Tikka to Ride – Waffles Like sugar and spice, I feel KRYTEN: Waffles, sir! Dripping in honey and jam, with three fried eggs on the side, coated in cheese. 1.55 The Last Day – Electronic Menu nice, Like sugar and RIMMER: Barium hydrochroide salad le soirs? 1.58 Tikka To Ride – Curry Night spice KRYTEN: Those little onions.LISTER: Dill pickle. 2.00 Blue – Potato Salad So nice, So nice CAT: Is that the firm, delicatessen form of potato salad, or the squishy, gooey stuff in tins? 2.04 Marooned – List I got you RIMMER: A brown lemon, two bottles of vinegar… 2.06 Legion – Sugar Puff Sandwiches LISTER: Sugar Puff sandwiches, my favourite! 2.08 Demons and Angels – Cinema Hot Dogs KRYTEN: Cinema hot dogs! 2.10 Thanks For The Memory – Fried Egg Butty LISTER: I want a triple fried egg butty, with chilli sauce and chutney. 2.13 DNA – Chicken Ovulations KRYTEN: Boiled chicken ovulations! Delicious! 2.15 Pete (Part One) – Prison Food When I hold you RIMMER: You waited until I was swallowing before you said that, didn’t you? 2.19 The Last Day – Waffles (on head) In my arms 2.21 Pete (Part One) – Potato Mountain I know that I can’t do no wrong 2.24 Tikka To Ride – Pappadams And when I hold you, In my arms, Love won’t do LISTER: So you mean, now we’ve got no pappadams at all? 2.29 Demons and Angels – Pot Noodle you no harm, And I feel 2.32 Only the Good… – rolls nice, Like sugar and spice BAXTER: [giggles] 2.35 Backwards – Tomatoes I feel nice 2.39 Waiting For God – Toast Like sugar and TOASTER: I toast, therefore I am. 2.41 White Hole – Fried Eggs spice 2.44 Balance of Power – Trout a lá Creme So nice, So nice, I got CAT: Fish!MACHINE: Today’s fish is Trout a lá Creme. Enjoy your meal.CAT: I will! 2.48 Confidence and Paranoia – beer milkshake you 2.49 Beyond A Joke – Curry World Wow! I feel good OMNES: Argh! 2.52 Bodyswap – Mashed Potato I knew that I would now 2.55 Pete (Part One) – Soup I feel BAXTER: You spilled my soup! 2.58 Polymorph – Alphabetti Spaghetti good RIMMER: ALPHABETTI SPAGHETTI!? 3.00 Psirens – Tabasco I knew that I would, So 3.05 Polymorph – Shami Kebab Diablo good, So good 3.07 Out of Time – Chicken Vindaloo I got you RIMMER: What’s his mission? To rid the universe of chicken vindaloo? 3.10 Confidence and Paranoia – Potato Juggling So good, So good 3.14 Out of Time – Chillies I got you, So 3.18 Gunmen of the Apocalypse – Chicken Leg good 3.19 Nanarchy – Sweet So good, I got you 3.22 Kryten – Tomato Soup 3.27 Bodyswap – Cream Doughnut Hey! 3.29-3.36 Emohawk – Polymorph II – Beans Oh, yeah! Some highlights of this feature include the punctuation of Rimmer’s sprout speech, with reaction shots from other episodes. There are also a couple of elements, such as the chocolate finger display and the man from Tikka To Ride, that are placed, later to be returned to. Also, there’s an impressive bit of lip-synch towards the end, as Lister (in Rimmer’s body) starts talking on-screen as James Brown screams ‘Hey!’. There are, however, few notable omissions, presumably for reasons of time or pace. These include the Chicken Merango, the Vindaloo beast, a pea on toast, the pizza from Holoship, Salad Cream (either in the fridge or the cupboard), irradiated haggis and smoked kippers.