Yes, Ian’s quite literally buggered off somewhere, so I’m on hand to tell you about the TOS updates. After all, you’d never figure out how to get there yourself and read them.

Firstly, the Image Bank has been updated, with 64 more images (8 more for each series – that’s 20 altogether). Unfortunately, I can’t actually see more than 12 images a page, although I am getting the funky coloured backgrounds. What is wrong with me?

Secondly and lastly, the commentary competition has now closed. I thought this happened at the end of January, and therefore didn’t get round to entering. I am genuinely upset about missing this, and I expect you all to use the comments system to console me. Especially when we are told that “frankly even the strongest of stomachs would have been put off by the level of excretion stories on offer”, when mine would have been nice and original. It would have been about spunk. Waaah.

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