Instead of sitting around mourning the lack of news, I thought I’d go on a hunt for some for once. So imagine my astonishment when I came across this:

April 03, 2005

At last check, Red Dwarf IX was in the writing stages. As far as the continuity line for the new Series we won’t know if it’ll pick up after the Red Dwarf Movie or have a continuation off Red Dwarf VIII’s “Only The Good” Finale. More details should be finalized after the Movie is completed. Expect at least 8 more new Episodes for Red Dwarf IX.

More as the Guide Editor is able to confirm but so far that’s the latest details.

Forgive me for being skeptical, but… I’m skeptical. Very. Fucking. Skeptical. Especially about the comment on the continuity line – we all know the Movie is completely seperate from the TV series, so any possible Red Dwarf IX having anything to do with the Movie is extremely unlikely.

Either GNP has a major surprise up their sleeve, or people are just Making Things Up. Guess which I think is the most likely?

19 comments on “Red Dwarf IX

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  • Not only that, but how on Earth can something be in the writing stages if they don’t even know whether it’ll follow series VIII or begin at the end of the movie? If Doug can’t decide which direction to take the next series it’s unlikely he’s writing episodes yet.

    Still…it WOULD be nice…

  • While there’s surely no way this ‘news’ confirms anything, I am always hopeful that Doug has been writing a new series alongside his filmmaking exploits. We’ll see……………… What am I talking about?? It’s a steaming pile of BS!

  • There is no way that there would be a ninth series being written and someone, somewhere not know about it. It would have been let slip somewhere. Do you REALLY think Andrew could keep that sort of news to himself? The guy has to deal with people clamouring, probably on a daily basis, for news about what’s going on with future projects. If there was a juicy tidbit like that waiting in reserve, you just know it’d have been thrown to the clamouring mob by now.

    Of course, I’d love to be proven wrong. For all the things I dislike about the last two series, for all my scepticism about the movie, I wouldn’t object if you told me there was a chance of new Dwarf on our screens. No sir.

  • I just realised that might have sounded rather offensive. Obviously I only meant to be mildly pedantic, with just a hint of profanity; it’s the fact that I’ve just lost a game of FIFA 2005 that’s making me rant everywhere I post at the moment. Obviously.

  • Seb, its only a game.

    Odd init, it gets mentioned on here that another series of dwarf would be a good idea and then all of a sudden theres news that its being written.

    It’d be nice though, theres very little worth watching these days.

  • >Seb, its only a game.

    You don’t understand. I’m a FIFA veteran, and usually it only takes me one or two matches on the Amateur level to get a feel for the new game’s controls before I can move up to the harder difficulty levels. But having installed the game yesterday, I’m still getting beaten on Amateur at the moment, because this game – while it finally does everything in the front-end and pre-game right, which no FIFA game has done since 2001 – is drastically harder than 2004. Opposition defenders intercept the ball uncannily, and it’s extremely difficult to even get shots on target now. So it’s not so much the fact that I lost, it’s that the way in which I lost (having all the possession but struggling to score for 88 minutes, then having the computer score in the last minute because my players don’t run as fast as their players) was incredibly frustrating and made me want to hurl my joypad through the monitor.

    *calms down*

    So that’s why I was a little tetchy ;-)

  • Yeah, FIFA 2005 is pissing me off as well. I’ve played the series since 99. The most annoying thing about this new game (this was a factor in previous games as well) is that the game likes to take control away from the player at every available opportunity.

    For instance, when an opposition player is standing on the wing inside your half. Now, you have a player near the opposition player – because of this, the other opposition player with the ball will not pass it to him. You know that if the player you are controlling moves away to tackle the player with the ball, that player will pass the ball to the opposition player on the wing who will send in a potentially deadly cross. What does FIFA do? It takes it upon itself to select another player nearer the player with the ball, so you lose control of the player who was preventing the ball being played to the opposition player on the wing, the opposition player on the wing gets the ball, crosses it in… GOAL.

    Or also sometimes when there is a situation where the ball has come loose after an opposition attack and is heading out for a throw still well within your half. An opposition player will chase after this and FIFA will make it so you will too. Makes sense doesn’t it, since surely you running after this player will prevent a cross coming in. WRONG. Because you run after the oppostion player in a straight line. What’s wrong with that? Well, as soon as you get to the player he can quickly turn to his left and cross the ball in. If you had control of your player, you could have blocked the ball by going to his left. But you can’t… GOAL.

    Also, when an opposition player is running fast down a wing. Now you can’t catch up with this player in time to prevent him getting a cross in. You KNOW a cross will come in. What would you do? I would want to select my defenders inside the box and mark the opposition strikers… of course, you are almost always not allowed to do this. You are forced to have your players selected to pointlessly chase after this guy. That guy gets a cross in, you haven’t got anyone marking the strikers… GOAL.

    Corners are still a problem for me and the computer seems to have a much greater chance of scoring than you do.

    Penalities are now poorly done as well. The keeper has a hilariously big chance of saving it. The problem is now you can only really shoot left or right – in that if you shoot left and the keeper goes left it is defintely saved – which shouldn’t really be the case. It should be that if you hit it hard enough the keeper will be less likely to save it OR the keeper can only jump slightly to the left sometimes. NO. You have to contend with your penalties often having as much as a 50/50 chance of going in or being saved. Poor stuff.


    And as for Series IX, I hope its true. That would be great.

  • Yeah. Ok. Next time I’ll get it. The entire gaming community seems to have been telling me this for years. :)

  • I’ll play Pro Evo as soon as they bring it out on the sodding Gamecube, the bastards.

    I have a Cube, a PS1, and a PC that’ll run FIFA but not Pro Evo 4 (believe me, I spent two days downloading Pro Evo 4 before discovering it wouldn’t work). Pro Evo 2 on PS1 is great, but I do get fed up of playing (a) only international games and (b) horribly out-of-date rosters. On the presentation side of things, and what you can do with regards to creating players, tournaments etc., they’ve got it bang on with FIFA 2005 – now all they need is to have you be able to edit teams again, like you could right up to 2001. But the game engine, while getting better (there seems to have been a massive change from 2002 onwards, I’ve got a feeling they built that one from the ground up whereas every previous one was an evolution of RTWC98), still isn’t quite there, and still isn’t anywhere near Pro Evo (heck, it isn’t anywhere near Pro Evo 2, let alone 3 or 4).

    But yeah, show me a Gamecube Pro Evo (or an affordable way of getting Winning Eleven) and I’ll show you a happy Seb. Meanwhile, FIFA it is – although 2005, while infuriating, has impressed me enough that when it gets a bit cheaper I’ll probably buy it for Cube and trade 2004 back in.

  • I too am a Nintendo fan (and have a fondness of Fifa 2003 which, while not being a great simulation is a lot of fun. Fifa 2005 is great with 4 players.

    I have no appreciation of Playstation and am similarly unethused by Xbox, however I purchased Pro Evo on the PC after playing it on these machines. Pretty soon it became clear that my antiquated PC and budget graphics card weren’t coping too well and I’ve slowly began upgrading. This game is worth it.

  • The Xbox has been full of shit for it’s entire lifespan. The only decent games are those ported over from the PS2 or Gamecube. And don’t give me some shit about Halo and Halo 2 – massively overrated because the Xbox has no decent exclusive titles.

    Anyway, I played Pro evo and it’s fucking difficult! Well I thought it was. It seems like one of those where you have to play it for hours just to get to grips with the game engine. It’s more realistic than FIFA. Strange how a Red Dwarf story can turn into comments about football games.

  • Ah, performingmonkey, I used to be sad and misguided like you, before I actually worked in a games shop and saw the way the market is at the moment.

    At launch, the XBox was inferior to the PS2, despite being a vastly more powerful machine, due to the lack of games range. This has changed. There are still far, far more games for PS2 – but what people tend not to realise is that this also means that there is a LOT of absolute shite. Games that retail at ?20 or even ?10 on release clog up the shelves. The XBox, meanwhile, has a tidier, more stripped-down range, and it’s of overall higher quality.

    There is not a single decent games franchise that PS2 have an exclusive over XBox on now, with the exception of Metal Gear Solid and Gran Turismo. And when games come over from PS2 to XBox, they’re invariably better due to the much higher quality of processing power. You’re wrong, meanwhile, to say that there aren’t any good XBox exclusives – ignoring your wrong comment about Halo (2 is overrated, but the first is superb), there’s Fable, OutRun 2, Doom III, Half-Life 2 and Forza Motorspot to name just a few.

    I don’t own either a PS2 or an XBox, so I’m not biased towards either one. From a Gamecube-owning, games shop-working perspective, the XBox is now clearly the superior console.

    The Gamecube pwns all, of course, it’s a wonderful little console – it just needs a better range of sports, racing and flight games.

  • Having read this thread, I was somewhat surprised to find the the PS2 version of this game is a piece of fucking piss. I’m playing as Hibs in career mode and I’ve just beaten Rangers 6-0 away from home.

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