That’s right, the 13th almost annual Red Dwarf convention, Dimension Jump, has finally arrived.

This year is especially notable for the inclusion of almost all main cast members. Norman Lovett, Hattie Hayridge, Chris Barrie, Danny John-Jules and Robert Llewellyn are big fat definites, and the chances of Craig Charles being dragged in too remain high after Chairman James’ good news last week and the even better news that Craig was now in the clear and, more importantly, on the mend.

So, that’s everyone except ChloĆ« then. Never mind!

Anyone who’s attended a DJ before will know that it’s not *really* about the flashy guests, with their flashy cars and their flashy crashes into solid brick walls, but actually about meeting a veritable gaggle of fine fans like yourself. Expect drink, drugs and take-away pizza as your fellow geeks try to block out the immense shitness of the hotel. The Holiday Inn in Peterborough be DAMNED with your poor menus and expensive wares.

Fancy a dance? Then go to the disco on Saturday night. Feel like making a complete and total tit of yourself? Then the karaoke is clearly your bag! Are you a fucking loud mouth inconsiderate cunt? Then shout out lewd comments at married cast members! There is quite literally something for everyone!

But, above all, make sure you stop by and say hello to the Ganymede & Titan boys and girl. We’ll be sat in the corner with a small array of audio recording equipment and a whole load of love. We might even sign your Red Dwarf VII DVDs if you really don’t care about their re-sell value…

If you’re not going then… well, you’re a lost cause basically. Still, to cater for you monetarily and geographically challenged fuck-wits we’ll have reports (maybe) and all new DwarfCasts (possibly) on our return, so look out for those.

19 comments on “DJ is upon us

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  • Well, speaking as one the ‘fuck-wits’, I’d just like to say, have a good time etc.

    I was looking forward to some intercourse with your goodselves (something I dont expect you hear very often), but the family decided otherwise.

  • This is a massive shame, Steve. Am I right in saying that the last DJ you attendec was 2003? I remember several amusing conversations with you.

  • Someone please hug Chris Barrie for me…squeeze his butt and report back here by comparing it to the appropriate fruit.

  • How come you’re not DJing Arlene? You’re not one of these ghastly so-called “Americans” are you?…

  • How come you’re not DJing Arlene? You’re not one of these ghastly so-called “Americans” are you?…

    Damn! He knows. Oh, the shame :p . Yes, I’m a Yank, and penniless at that. In my defense, however, I was unable to get my parents to move to England before it was too late on account of being not born yet at the time.

  • It was fucking brilliant! I was really worried about this year as I didn’t have a great time last year, but this was fantastic.

    Proper report later in the week. Along with some DWARFCASTS. As soon as they’ve been extremely heavily edited.

  • That was most probably the best DJ I’ve been to. Not just in terms of personal enjoyment, but the general organisation and tightness of the whole thing was very pleasing.

    Expect DwarfCast: DJXIII #1 this coming weekend.

  • Oh, sorry Arlene, I completely failed to hug Chris for you! My memory isn’t all that good when I replace sleep with intoxicants…

  • ‘S all right; I blame the booze, not you. Seduced by strong liquors, you were. Anyway, I’ll see if I can’t be there next year, so the point is (or will be) moot.

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