Home Forums Ganymede & Titan Forum Jokes you don't/didn't get

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  • #232813
    Pete Part Three
    Participant

    What’s the general consensus on Series VIII?

    #232814
    bloodteller
    Participant

    i think we’ve experienced this period of time before, sirs.

    #232815
    Warbodog
    Member

    “Squeeze your roll” isn’t a euphemism for wanking where I grew up (Earth), so I assumed the latter.

    I just mentally went through all the episode titles to see if there were any obvious puns I’ve never noticed, and realised ‘Epideme’ probably refers to ‘epidemic,’ not some completely random exotic future name.

    #232820
    Piplup2003
    Member

    >What’s the general consensus on Series VIII?

    Despite what everyone else says about it, VIII is probably my second favourite series, after V.

    #232821
    bloodteller
    Participant

    wasn’t that the general consensus on the series back when it first came out? there was a poll and i think VIII came second, just below V.

    #232822
    bloodteller
    Participant

    >“Squeeze your roll” isn’t a euphemism for wanking where I grew up (Earth), so I assumed the latter.

    yeah, but if you were a bloke and a woman you liked came up to you and said “can i squeeze your roll?” you’d think ‘oh brilliant, she’s going to wank me off”, right? you wouldn’t think she actually wants to grasp your wheaty breakfast product.

    #232825
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    Sounds more like giving somebody a massage, to me

    #232826
    bloodteller
    Participant

    either way if someone says that to you, you’re probably in for something rather nice

    #232827
    bloodteller
    Participant

    if you like massages and/or being wanked off, that is.

    #232828
    clem
    Participant

    The rest of Cat’s line after “squeeze their rolls?” isn’t really needed for the joke to work, but I think it works as Cat digging himself a hole, annoying Baxter even more without realising it. Only example I can think of where the VIII thing of over-explaining the gag kind of adds to it.

    Maybe if he’d said buns instead of rolls there could have been an extra joke where Baxter thinks Cat is saying he’s gonna squeeze their bum cheeks.

    #232830
    Pete Part Three
    Participant

    It’s a very long time since I saw this, but surely the “joke” is that destroying the roll is symbolising torturing somone, and The Cat takes it *at face value* and thinks destroying a snack is just a very peculiar way of punishing someone.

    If you start adding extra euphemisms, it kind of ruins it. Surprising they didn’t, actually,

    #232832
    bloodteller
    Participant

    oh yeah, that makes much more sense.

    #233372
    bloodteller
    Participant

    “are you 21 or under?”

    “well my haircut is, does that count?”

    eh?

    #233386

    I think that means his haircut is better suited for a 21 year old than a middle aged guy

    #233395
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    “I’ve given pleasure to the world because I have such a beautiful ass”
    What world?

    #233397
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    Now i think about it where the fuck are they when the Inquisitor inquisits them?

    #233401

    >What world?

    Cat thinks the world of himself, therefor, he’s given pleasure to himself with his great ass

    #233404
    Dave
    Participant

    Now i think about it where the fuck are they when the Inquisitor inquisits them?

    I always assumed it was some secret Inquisitor-palace in the far future or outside of regular spacetime entirely, equipped with tech to allow him to channel versions of the characters to judge themselves. It’s a bit metaphysical, I know.

    #233419
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    >He’s given pleasure to himself with his great ass
    TMI.

    #233471
    Ian Symes
    Keymaster

    “are you 21 or under?”

    “well my haircut is, does that count?”

    eh?

    I thought it meant that he got his haircut less than 21 years ago, but that seems less likely to be the intended meaning the more I think about it.

    #233474
    bloodteller
    Participant

    maybe his haircut is under 21 inches long?

    #233475
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    Maybe it’s a new style, or so he thinks?

    #233493
    Lily
    Participant

    I presumed it was because hair is always growing, his hair is younger than 21.

    #233502
    Flap Jack
    Participant

    When Cat says “I’ve given pleasure to the world” he’s using the classical definition of world, “all of known existence”, rather than the modern definition, “planet”.

    #233503
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    Thank you, i can sleep easy now

    #233597
    Plastic Percy
    Participant

    I took the haircut line is that, if nothing else, his hairstyle is young, fresh and happening.

    #233654
    bloodteller
    Participant

    why in Lemons do they refer to penises as “stuffin’ snuffin’ shiderhausers” (?)

    is there some sort of joke there or are you just not allowed to say cock on Dave

    #233704
    NoFro
    Participant

    I think Lister is saying “Stuffin’ stuff up his schneiberhauser” or schneiderhauser or something. Schneiberhauser obviously being a hilarious euphemism for penis. Obviously.

    #233706
    Pete Part Three
    Participant

    When Kryten mutters “Cunt” under his breath in Duct Soup, is he talking about Lister or Kochanski?

    #233797
    bloodteller
    Participant

    LISTER: Our nomination for JMC Crew Of The Year Award is starting to look unlikely…

    RIMMER: Those damn space monkey from the Omega 4 are gonna get it again!!

    eh? so…3 million years into deep space, the JMC still hosts award ceremonies? what are space monkeys? what the hell are they talking about?

    #233843
    Pete Part Three
    Participant

    I googled deeley boppers after watching Ouroborus the other day. Never been bothered before. The episode is 17 times more amusing to me now.

    #233889
    Taiwan Tony
    Participant

    Nice reference to deeley boppers in Blue Heaven. Eddie Nichols and his novelty cash-in single for the victims of famine “Don’t send food, send…”
    I loved Blue Heaven.

    #233891
    Dave
    Participant

    Blue Heaven was great. I loved the ‘DIED’ anagram gag.

    #233896
    clem
    Participant

    > I loved the ‘DIED’ anagram gag.

    Refresh my memory please. I liked it but other than the night club where all the waiters are Frank Carson impersonators I don’t remember much of Blue Heaven. Shane, Frank Skinner’s other sitcom, is really good too. The ‘Do my share/Cher’ joke in that is one of my favourite jokes ever.

    #233901
    si
    Participant

    Blue Heaven’s on All 4.
    http://www.channel4.com/programmes/blue-heaven

    Actually, Captain Butler’s on there, too. I won’t provide a link, I respect you too much.

    #233903
    clem
    Participant

    And the episode of Bunch of Fives that served as the pilot for Blue Heaven is here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1u4DK1DxMU

    #233906
    bloodteller
    Participant

    Vic and Bob’s “The Weekenders” was on Bunch Of Fives too, wasn’t it? That was a really funny show, I’ll never get why they didn’t pick it up for a full series.

    #233907
    clem
    Participant

    That’s right. Vic and Bob were told they could make a series of The Weekenders as long as they also made another series of Big Night Out, but they didn’t want to do more Big Night Out. Apparently that’s at least partly why they moved to the BBC.

    #233911
    bloodteller
    Participant

    back on the topic of Jokes You Didn’t Get, i was watching Confidence and Paranoia the other day and this particular exchange stuck out to me-

    LISTER: I feel really ill…
    RIMMER: You ARE really ill.
    LISTER: No, I mean really ill…

    what is Rimmer on about?

    #233913
    Taiwan Tony
    Participant

    The DIED joke was stagehands carrying Eddie’s name in huge letters. They walked in the order D I E D. And Frank asked “Has he not been well?”
    Full of jokes. Shane is full of jokes, too. But the show was very ITV.

    #233914
    Dave
    Participant

    That’s the one. A silly joke but the setup and delivery of it always made me chuckle.

    #233916
    Unrumble
    Participant

    >back on the topic of Jokes You Didn’t Get, i was watching Confidence and Paranoia the other day and this particular exchange stuck out to me-

    LISTER: I feel really ill…
    RIMMER: You ARE really ill.
    LISTER: No, I mean really ill…

    what is Rimmer on about?

    I always took this to be Rimmer offhandedly having a jab at Lister’s generally unhealthy lifestyle. A foreshadowing of the comments he makes in Bodyswap, say.

    #233917

    I always heard it as meaning mentally ill, as series 1 Rimmer’s general perspective of Lister being a complete imbecile.

    #233936
    Warbodog
    Member

    Is ‘Back in the Red’ supposed to be a (thematically irrelevant) riff on being ‘in the red’ with debt? A pun on ‘back from the dead’ (as per the DVD documentary) that’s not close enough to work? Or just a cool way of saying ‘we’re back on Red Dwarf’ with nothing more to it?

    #233938
    Dave
    Participant

    I thought it was a pun on the debt-related phrase, but without any deeper meaning to it.

    #233939
    Taiwan Tony
    Participant

    And the horror that that entails.

    #233943
    Hamish
    Participant

    Makes more sense than Twentica.

    #233952
    bloodteller
    Participant

    I always thought Back In The Red was just a cool and interesting way of saying “we’re back on Red Dwarf”. It never even occurred to me that it might have been a joke title based around the debt-related phrase. That’s ruined it a little tbh, debt isn’t nearly as cool as spaceships

    #233958
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    They’re literally back in (the) Red (Dwarf), which is also a term to do with debt.
    I didn’t make the connection of a pun title until some advert in like 2008 talked about being in the red.

    #233969
    Dave
    Participant

    This came out a year before series VIII, so the Red Dwarf title just made me think of that.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_the_Red_(TV_series)

    #233989
    Toxteth O-Grady
    Participant

    >Makes more sense than Twentica.

    I was at one of the pre-screenings of that episode, which was followed by a very brief Q&A. My question was going to be “why the f*** was it called Twentica?”.

    I’ve since read that it’s supposed to be a portmanteau of Twenties America, or something. It’s still pretty baffling even with that explanation. Especially as it’s never mentioned in the episode itself.

    Sadly, I never got picked. The person who did get picked asked the much more pertinent and interesting question of “What’s your favorite episode of Red Dwarf?”.

    #233995

    Sadly, I never got picked. The person who did get picked asked the much more pertinent and interesting question of “What’s your favorite episode of Red Dwarf?”.

    Don’t leave us hanging, what was the answer?

    #233998
    Toxteth O-Grady
    Participant

    I think Robert Llewellyn mentioned ‘Lemons’ and I immediately tuned out.

    #234064
    flanl3
    Participant

    Uh oh, not a man with taste, not around here

    #237669
    Dave
    Participant

    The “couple of blanks” arse-cheek gag from The End. I didn’t even realise there was a gag there until I listened to the commentary.

    #237672
    ori-STUDFARM
    Participant

    There’s a lot of early references went over my head…Moss Bros and Teasy-Weasy is one that instantly springs to mind. Reading through the above, a few of those too.

    #237702
    Ridley
    Participant

    >I thought it was a pun on the debt-related phrase, but without any deeper meaning to it.

    Well, it’s back on Red Dwarf and the episodes are bookended with the Dwarfers having to pay a debt to society.

    #237709
    tombow
    Participant

    I was always confused by Cat boasting about his thrusts being as fast as a drill or jird, because aren’t good lovers stereotypically slow and measured?

    #237711
    Hamish
    Participant

    And would Cat really make a good lover tombow?

    #237727
    tombow
    Participant

    No, but he seems to think he would based on speed. I guess…I was a confused kid when I saw it, so I kind of wondered if men were meant to be fast lovers, as I’d heard people on other sitcoms joking about men being too fast.

    #237731
    Pete Part Three
    Participant

    Cat is referring to the motion in the ocean, not the speed at which the ocean is traversed.

    #237740
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    Cat has a high PPS (pumps per second)

    #237749
    Lily
    Participant

    >aren’t good lovers stereotypically slow and measured?

    That’s all good and well, but sometimes you just want a good Black&Decker’ing.

    #237750
    Unrumble
    Participant

    Obvious ones like not getting references when I was younger, especially in the earlier series “the poor goit you made look like Helen Shapiro!.”

    I think it was a while before I understood the implication of “Maybe Ace-hole” too…

    #237753
    Taiwan Tony
    Participant

    >That’s all good and well, but sometimes you just want a good Black&Decker’ing.

    Easily the sexiest thing I’ve read today.

    #237755
    Plastic Percy
    Participant

    I’ve only just bothered to learn that a Jird, more accurately named a Persian Jird, is in fact a real animal.

    #237779
    R.C.M.
    Member

    From Backwards: “It’s exactly like I always imagined, only much shorter.”

    Maybe I’m mis-remembering things, but wasn’t there a deleted line/scene that explains why Kryten says this?

    #237788
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    I assume the joke is he read up on Earth in books and, from the pictures, assumed that trees were absolutely enormous, so he looks at the extremely tall trees and remarks that they seem rather short.

    If there was a deleted scene to explain that joke and I’ve gotten it wrong I’d love to know.

    #237794
    NoFro
    Participant

    I think “…only much shorter” is just a funny nonsensical line which I’ve always loved. Earth could be bigger or smaller than Kryten imagined but it doesn’t make sense to comment on the Earth as being “tall” or “short”, especially when Kryten’s on the surface and can’t even see the whole thing. I think the look on Rimmer’s face is evidence that it’s supposed to be nonsensical.

    #237796
    Lily
    Participant

    I always thought it was a play on the thing where people say that actors look shorter in real life than they do on tv/film.

    #237800
    NoFro
    Participant

    Yes, that too!

    #237801
    Dave
    Participant

    If that was the joke then I never got it.

    #237802
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    When the question was first asked I thought “only much shorter” wasn’t a particularly good joke, ie it was alright, but now I’m amazed that it works on all three levels and am convinced it’s genius

    #238098
    bloodteller
    Participant

    In response to the discussion from a while ago, I re-read IWCD the other day, and it’s mentioned in a later chapter that “George McIntrye was force-fed his own nose”, so they definitely did cut it off. How gruesome

    #254160
    Warbodog
    Member

    “How come you need more memory? Over the years, you’ve had more RAM than a field of sheep.”

    ‘Had’ as in sex. Not: he’s got more RAM than the number of rams you get in a standard field of sheep.

    Which, being the son of a farmer, I knew was often just the one, on its own rather than mixed with the ewes, and thus a bit of an underwhelming comparison to make for Kryten’s supposedly impressive memory capacity, whatever units they’re using. It confused me slightly when watching the Xtended video repeatedly at 12.

    #254161
    Dave
    Participant

    I guess if Rimmer doesn’t know the intimate details of sheep farming then it still works as something he’d say.

    #254162
    Dave
    Participant

    (Or Cat or Lister, or whoever the fuck says it.)

    #254164
    Warbodog
    Member

    Also only recently realised that fan favourite character Dr Lucas McLaren is asking “your chair is screwed down?” because he’s worried Kryten’s going to attack him with the chair, not some oblique way of suggesting he’s got a screw loose.

    I haven’t watched VII or VIII much since I was about 14, so some of these youthful misconceptions go unchecked for decades.

    #254165

    Also only recently realised that fan favourite character Dr Lucas McLaren is asking “your chair is screwed down?” because he’s worried Kryten’s going to attack him with the chair, not some oblique way of suggesting he’s got a screw loose.

    So THAT’S what that’s about. I’d always assumed it was the latter explaination.

    #254166
    Paul Muller
    Participant

    “Personally I prefer partnership Whist” – I understand the point of it, but it’s such an obscure activity to reference. They could have gone with backgammon or tiddlywinks, or elected for an obvious wanking gag and chosen Solitaire.

    I guess it’s because I watched most of Red Dwarf as a ten year old, so jokes based around 18th century card games were always going to fly over my head. For a long time, I thought it was some kind of dance.

    #254578
    Warbodog
    Member

    “If she ever ran into Tutankhamen, he wouldn’t stand a chance. She’d have his bandages off before you could say ‘silicone implants.'”

    Didn’t get the breast implant reference at the time. I suppose: as well as the obvious joke about a 3,000-year-old man being more attractive by her definition than an 83-year-old, a king’s considerable wealth also makes him more attractive to a presumed gold digger than an actor, and the first thing she’d spend it on is cosmetic surgery, because that’s what a materialistic floozy would do.

    Or maybe Lister just saw her photo and she had big breasts.

    #254580
    bloodteller
    Participant

    >“Personally I prefer partnership Whist”

    up until now i thought he was saying “personally i prefer partnership waist” and it was some sort of health program like weightwatchers

    #254608
    clem
    Participant

    “Can someone take him outside and do something to him? Ideally involving ice cubes and any puckered body cavity.”

    And the callback line about the wooden mallet only confuses me further. Anyone?

    #254609
    By Jove its holmes
    Participant

    put an ice cube in his mouth then hit it with a mallet?

    #254610
    Warbodog
    Member

    My mind always goes to the mouth with these things, but consensus opinion on where Rimmer tried to insert the fridge and guitar lead me to conclude arse. Weird lines anyway.

    #254613
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    Shove an ice cube up his arse? That’s a bit bizarre

    #254616

    Rimmer isn’t exactly normal is he.

    #254622
    GlenTokyo
    Participant

    Knowing Doug’s writing, maybe it’s a reference to a film he saw at the time.

    Don’t know what films would involve someone having ice cubes shoved up their arse and/or getting hit with a mallet but the 90s had some odd ones and Doug has eclectic taste I’m sure.

    Sounds a sexual to be honest, the ice cubes bit. All a bit weird haha

    #254663
    MANI506
    Participant

    Why does Cat call Rimmer Cinninatti at the start of Cured?

    #254686
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    Isn’t it something to do with rimming?

    #254741
    bloodteller
    Participant

    yeah, a Cinncinatti Truffle is where you fart in someone’s mouth during rimming. it”s a (surprisingly subtle) joke about Rimmer’s name/rimming. also i think the only joke about rimming in the entire show

    #254742
    Dave
    Participant

    There’s also “brown-tongued his way up the ranks” in Dimension Jump.

    #254743
    cwickham
    Participant

    Cinncinatti is also a poker term, I believe.

    #254744
    bloodteller
    Participant

    >Cinncinatti is also a poker term, I believe.

    yeah it is, but they’re evidently not playing cinncinatti poker (i haven’t watched Cured in ages, but they’re just playing regular 5-card poker iirc) so i think the intent is that it’s a rimming joke? even if that wasn’t the intent, surely it’s funnier if cat is making a snide remark about farting in someone’s mouth than him just inexplicably giving rimmer a poker-based nickname that’s totally unrelated to the variation of poker they’re actually playing

    #254746
    cwickham
    Participant

    Okay, but what’s more likely: It’s a reference to “Cincinnati Truffles” which doesn’t actually give the viewer enough information to work out that’s what it’s a reference to, or it’s a reference to a type of poker?

    #254750
    GlenTokyo
    Participant

    It’s almost certainly a poker reference.

    It’s cards banter innit.

    #254751
    bloodteller
    Participant

    >Okay, but what’s more likely: It’s a reference to “Cincinnati Truffles” which doesn’t actually give the viewer enough information to work out that’s what it’s a reference to, or it’s a reference to a type of poker?

    the first one

    #254752
    Dave
    Participant

    Doug has form for this: the “female aardvark” is a well-known sexual position and “trout a la creme” is disgusting slang for a popular fetish.

    #254768

    I honestly find the idea of Doug knowing what “Cincinnati truffles” means incredibly unlikely.

    #254769

    Maybe Doug is into that kind of thing. Or late one night, he found himself going down a dark rabbit hole on Urban Dictionary.

    Or, just perhaps, the name cincinnati truffle has been co-opted by the fetish community and Doug is much more familiar with the origins of the name in the card game.

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