PLOTS FOR SERIES 11

[Pecospete666]

PLOTS FOR SERIES 11?

I would like to see serious bad guys in some sort of in ship battle!

Topic

[si]

Lister and Rimmer desperately try to avoid the Zero-Gee Football results.

[si]

Rimmer goes mad and starts hitting Starbug with a branch.

[Ridley]

Flashback episode: Grateful to Lister for his moving farewell, Rimmer’s first act as Ace is to jump to an earlier period in Lister’s lifetime and rid Liverpool of its ethnic Chinese population. After toppling the arch, Ace decides he’s a bit bored with being a hero and goes back to Red Dwarf. Meanwhile, Lister uncovers evidence that he’s actually from Manchester, specifically his memory of leaving himself at the Rovers Return 2099 with a smudged post-it note instruction to “leave at pool”.

[si]

Rimmer and Lister are “on a break”.

[Pete Part Three]

Due to some weird space thing, all the good ideas in the universe are suddenly used up and, with no more adventures to take part in, the dwarfers wither away and die.

(This’ll be a multi-series arc)

[Pecospete666]

At least 1 Cat episode! I’m tired of Kyten hogging all the shows!

[Ridley]

Chris Barrie is replaced with a silent, life-size cardboard cutout of Rimmer for an episode. Neither the script nor the cast acknowledges the change in any way.

[Ridley]

Epideme II: Syphilis

[Phil]

Birdman is back…and he’s getting married! Lister, Rimmer, Kryten and Cat all fall over themselves (and each other!) in the hopes of becoming his best man. In the end he tells them that they’re all great men…and therefore none of them can truly be the best. He then rides Pete into the sunset.

In a fun B-plot, Lister finds a stranded human being in need of aid. His actions directly result in her gruesome death and he doesn’t give a shit.

[si]

The Dwarfers’ friend Ace turns up, and takes Lister, Rimmer, Cat, Kryten and Kochanski out clubbing.

[Ridley]

In a fun B-plot, Lister finds a stranded human being in need of aid.

“You make Birdman?”
“No… Birdwoman.”

Bird Science!
Birdfantasy and microchips

Starring Michael Birdmanasseri and Birdvanessa Birdangel

[si]

1) Lister goes to donate blood, hilarity ensues.

“A pint? That’s nearly a smeggin’ armful!”

2) Rimmer goes to donate blood, hilarity ensues.

“A pint? That’s very nearly a smegging armful, miladdio!”

[Pete Part Three]

Everyone gets gay.

[JamesTC]

Roboship:

Kryten joins a crew full of androids but eventually leaves because something happens.

Meanwhile, Lister auditions for Kryten’s replacement. Taiwan Tony is chosen over Talkie Toaster and that vending machine from ‘Only the Good…’.

[peas_and_corn]

But he knows so much about Rimmer, like his taste for chocolate.

[Ridley]

Pete: Part 2 – Tabby Ranks Mix

[Hesperus]

I’d like to see an episode where they find an old store of musical instruments on board.

I can imagine Rimmer trying to play the trumpet (badly) and winding up Lister with it. Of course, that would then need to have some greater significance in saving the/helping them with something else that happens later… not sure what though.

I’d also like it to be just the 4 Dwarfers staying on the ship, or at most raiding an empty moon/derelict etc.

[Phil]

Blue Midget forgets how to dance. The Dwarfers each take turns trying to teach it.

This is a five part episode.

[Ridley]

Whenever the crew asks Rimmer a question, he whispers “Magic!” then – with accompanying twinkly sound effect – throws glitter in their eyes.

[Ridley]

“Rimmer, am havin’ a heart attack!”
“Are you?”
“Look at me arm, man!”
“Oh yeah.”

[Pecospete666]

Kill off a character! The Simpsons are killing off a character this year! Bobbyllew is a good choice! Put him out of his misery of that mask!

[Pecospete666]

Kill off a character! The Simpsons are killing off a character this year! Bobbyllew is a good choice! Put him out of his misery of the mask! Vogons intercepted this post the first time I put it up.

[Ridley]

Whenever Lister tries to visit Kochanski’s quarters, John Barrowman’s head suddenly appears and sings at him, causing the last man alive to fall into a nearby space hedgerow.

[si]

John Barrowman’s head suddenly appears and sings at him, causing the last man alive to fall into a nearby space hedgerow.

Death by jazz hands.

[Phil]

Red Christmas: Xtended

[Ben Paddon]

Even better: Show Red Christmas to an audience, record the reaction, and add it to the episode. “Red Christmas, now with embarrassed coughing!”

[pfm]

The boys hit the edge of the universe, which turns out to be nothing more than a giant black cloth covered with thousands of LED bulbs (4.5W GU10s, cool white).

[ori-STUDFARM]

Kryten discovers he has another brother called Kane who is residing on a remote and seemingly deserted colony. At first things seem to be going swimmingly until Lister discovers the evil plot that Kane has been hatching. Kane has been working with a giant intelligent snowflake entity that feeds off organic lifeforms. He has already given the lives of the colonists to the entity and now plans to feed it the crew. Lister tries to warn the others but nobody believes him because he is stupid and now no longer even knows what an iguana is… again.

[steven87gill]

The only thing I ask for series 11 is that the production people don’t cake Chris Barrie with make up and slap (what look like) hair extensions on him.

I mean, look here.

http://www.ganymede.tv/wp-content/uploads/sfx-seriesx-rehearsals-350×422.jpg

Look how much more he actually looks like Rimmer in that photo, when they’re not trying to force it with OTT make up and weird flat looking, overly gelled/extension-ised hair.

Okay, so his hairline has receded a bit, but so what? Here, he naturally oozes *Rimmer-ness*

(is that a word?)

[Ridley]

I don’t want them to cake Robert Llewellyn in make-up or slap hair extensions on Craig Charles and Danny John-Jules.

[peas_and_corn]

Put makeup on Robert? It gets worse than that, Ridley. I’ve heard that there’s talk of putting a weird mask on his head.

[anniescribe]

I thought he looked a lot like Sam Rockwell in that one, actually.

[Ridley]

It’s an awkward Valentine’s Day for Lister when he opens the card and his secret admirer’s handwriting is a match for his mother’s. Again.

[Ridley]

Roboship:

Kryten joins a crew full of androids but eventually leaves because something happens.

So close.

—-

[Citation Needed]

The absence of Holly begins to seriously affect the running of the ship. The crew decides to make Red Dwarf free access so that anyone can program. With hilarious consequences.

[Moonlight]

Red Dwarf is blown up by Social Justice Simulants over Taiwan Tony’s voice.

[Phil]

They all become Kryten.

And by that I mean everyone chases Archie around the ship for 30 minutes.

[JamesTC]

The gang find a phone app that turns them all into Dwayne Dibbley. There are hilarious consequences.

[Ridley]

They all become Michael Crichton to reuse the dinosaur and gorilla assets from series VIII.

Amy no like Peter no like Amy Amy sad sad.

[Phil]

They all become the Medi-Bot.

[Nick R]

MEH-DI-BOT

[Pete Part Three]

Continuing the theme of cast dictating the plots by wishing to try on alternate make-up, Lister, Cat and Kryten all die. 25 minutes of H-based hilarity ensure.

[si]

Kryten gets dreadlocks.

[evarofzentral]

They all become computers, have a sex change between XI and XII and then get written out of the show.

[Ridley]

The Dwarfers go on a live tour but Lister is replaced by his doppelgänger from Cyberia played by Craig Bierko.

Guest starring Peter Kay as Ricky Gervais.

[peepingsignal]

They all become Holly, all at once. Hi-jinx ensue, until they all leave the ship when their legitimacy is questioned.

[Phil]

They all become PecosPete666.

[Ben Kirkham]

Now we know there’ll also be a Red Dwarf XII, is it possible XI will end with a great big cliffhanger?

[Ridley]

They all become Celebrities Disfigured.

[si]

They return to Coronation Street, only to find that Craig Charles has left.
Simon Gregson finds it difficult adjusting to life in deep space.

[pfm]

Rimmer is about to ‘die’, and the only way of saving him is for Lister, Cat and Kryten to be miniaturised and injected, by a skutter, into his light bee. A sort of sequel to Terrorform, though not copying it, obviously……

[Author]

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