shitty jobs

[Gwynnie]

I work in a crappy cafe… the other day my manager found ONE slightly dirty cup the other day, when I was full of cold and shouldn’t have been in anyway, the other girl went home early and left me on my own and there was a queue out the door. I am now being forced to read a massive, patronising manual about health and safety, or risk a disciplinary. And I have a BSc*, damnit!!! Anyone else want to tell us about crappy jobs/evil managers to erm… make me feel better?
*Not Bronze Swimming Certificate. I can hardly swim.

Topic

[si]

Oh, fuck off. ;)

[The PerformingMonkey]

> I don?t actually know what the job is yet because it?s not the one I was actually interviewd for, apparently?

It’s unbelievable how often that happens, or you’re interviewed but then suddenly the job doesn’t exist (or it never did and the interviewing has just happened to make up a quota or something, other people trying to keep themselves in a job).

[Dave]

>the job doesn?t exist (or it never did…

You would think that with equal opportunities legislation in place to protect applicants from discrimination, that there would also be something requiring employers to actually have a job available when interviewing people for it. In a different sphere it would contravene the trade descriptions act.

I have been interviewed for several jobs that did not exist, mostly by temp agencies fishing for employees.

[Gwynnie]

I interviewed for a property inspector and they put me in the fucking caf?. Awesome. I’m there right now so should hide the monitor…
I feel really sick today though. Guh.

[Tarka Dal]

> I have been interviewed for several jobs that did not exist, mostly by temp agencies fishing for employees.

How does that even work though? I’m not denying it happens, but they don’t earn anything until they send you out for work.

In other news, I’m bloody sick of my job. Which is probably why I’m still online at 1am on a School night.

[Ben Paddon]

I’m an unemployed writer, but there are a couple of interesting prospects on the horizon that mean I could very soon be an employed writer. That is, a person employed for the purposes of writing: A friend of mine in “the biz” wants me to work on an animated sitcom he’s got in development with Film Roman, and there’s a comic thingy happening that is nice.

Besides that, I occasionally pack RealD 3D movie posters and glasses into tubes and boxes and mail them out to movie theatres across the world.

[Dave]

>How does that even work though? I?m not denying it happens, but they don?t earn anything until they send you out for work.

They interview you for a fictitious job to check that you’ll turn up suited, booted & convoluted, ask you interview type questions and test you on Word, ExCel & Powerpoint. Then they say we can’t offer you that job but we’ll keep your records on file. There never was a job, I had a friend in recruitment, who told me they do it all the time. Sites like Monster are filled with ads for office jobs with an element of vagueness to them, those are temp agencies fishing.

[Gwynnie]

That just seems weird… Especially as all the temp agencies I went to claimed not to need anyone.

[Dave]

It is odd, and in the current climate probably not happening as much, but most people only temp until something permanent comes along and so people are leave in droves.

[Gwynnie]

My plan was to temp until March but nowhere wanted me! Well, except the one agency I joined, trained with, and then worked with about 3 times before they went bust… sad times..

[Tarka Dal]

> Then they say we can?t offer you that job but we?ll keep your records on file. There never was a job, I had a friend in recruitment, who told me they do it all the time. Sites like Monster are filled with ads for office jobs with an element of vagueness to them, those are temp agencies fishing.

Er yeah I got that bit. My point is they don’t make any money from you being on there books, or do they?

[Carlito]

I guess its easier to secure a new contract with a company if they can say “we got 2000 people for you to choose from” rather than “we got 20 people for you to choose from”. Also, the more people they sign up, the more people are likely to available to meet their requirements should any company call them tomorrow with an order for a large number of temps.

Worse still are the deceitful ones who never actually inform you that it’s only a temporary job until they’re kicking you out the door, or outright lie and tell you it’s permanent when it isn’t.

[Dave]

>I guess its easier to secure a new contract with a company if they can say ?we got 2000 people for you to choose from? rather than ?we got 20 people for you to choose from?. Also, the more people they sign up, the more people are likely to available to meet their requirements should any company call them tomorrow with an order for a large number of temps.

Exactly

[Tarka Dal]

Either way though they still aren’t taking any money of you.

Also:

> who never actually inform you that it?s only a temporary job until they?re kicking you out the door

Erm well yes that would be bad, which is why you’re supposed to read and sign a contract in these situations.

Don’t get me wrong I know how ages work, I’ve been temping for three years now across various agencies, however they do take some of the leg work out of job-searching and can be useful for getting to know the job markets when you move to a new area.

[Carlito]

> Erm well yes that would be bad, which is why you?re supposed to read and sign a contract in these situations.

Some give you ‘indefinite’ contracts which just keep rolling; basically, they reserve the right at any time to reassign you or make you redundant. I now work for a large and well known media company, but not directly… I actually work for the recruitment company. They get paid by the company and then pay me.

So any contract I’ve signed doesn’t protect me at all. That’s not a moan, a lot of companies do it nowadays.

[Tarka Dal]

> but not directly? I actually work for the recruitment company.

Until you ask about such things as complimentary eye-tests because you work with a VDU. Which is when you’ll find out that technically you are infact self-employed ;-)

[Ridley]

even though getting the IDW stuff over here is a patchy process at best?

You can get them on Amazon UK fine these days.

[Gwynnie]

Ah yes, temping can often mean you’re “self employed”, despite the fact that they’ll helpfully take the tax out of your paycheck… interesting, that one.

[Carlito]

I do get free eye tests.

[Dave]

>Ah yes, temping can often mean you?re ?self employed?, despite the fact that they?ll helpfully take the tax out of your paycheck? interesting, that one.

If you are registered as self-employed, and pay tax through a PAYE, then when you submit a tax return you will get a rebate. In February, every actor I know starts talking about their rebate.

[Plastic Percy]

I’m a student and I’ve actually applied for a job at McDonalds…

If they reject me, Christ being rejected by fucking McDonalds, I’m gonna have to go on the game. According to a website I found I can make up to ?160 an hour as an escort for middle-aged divorcees.

[si]

I’ve been rejected by McDonalds, WHSmiths and Blockbuster Video. Shocking.

[Tarka Dal]

> I do get free eye tests.

Well that has to be some compensation for the magic morphing contract I suppose. A lot of the legislation for agency staff was due to change in the past 12 months so that agency workers gained a lot of parellels with perm staff (after a set period in the role). It was quite big news for a while, but I can recall if any of it was ever passed. Sounds like it must have been.

[Gwynnie]

Percy, I have a 2:1 and I STILL get rejected from places like that. Geez, the amount of crap jobs I have applied for and never even had an interview. Some people say that having a degree puts them off because they know you won’t settle for their shitty job in the long run… still, though, it’s hardly fair is it – “sorry, you’re too intelligent for this job”, while the “better” jobs don’t think you’re good enough. Even worse is when you go into a place that rejected your application, and the person working there is a complete tool.

[Trena]

University is the new church, where all prayers can be muttered out, but none answered.

I plan to either sell my body or become a carpenter.

[si]

>I plan to either sell my body or become a carpenter.

Either way, you got wood.

[Trena]

And a nasty splinter.

[Gwynnie]

Selling your body is a lot more profitable, it seems. I did an Ann Summers party for a group of “escorts” once who could afford to pay rent on a ?1000 a month flat…

[Trena]

A Youtube link to said event would be welcome by the immediate denizen mob.

[hummingbird]

I think in a lot of cases you’re only going to get a job through who you know. A lot of vacancies aren’t even advertised, they just end up going to friends of friends of existing employees. Saves the company time and a tidy sum on recruitment.

It’s not fair, but that’s the way it goes.

[Gwynnie]

Yeps, I only have my current job because my cousin is the manager..

[Seb Patrick]

>You can get them on Amazon UK fine these days.

Ah, but I don’t mean trades (the comic shops get those in fine, too), I mean getting the actual monthly issues. There’s licensing issues that prevent the Doctor Who stuff (and BOOM!’s Muppet Show and Incredibles titles) being distributed directly through Diamond. The likes of FP still order them in from abroad, but they don’t get them straight away, or on anything like an ordinary schedule.

[Author]

Replies