Home Forums Ganymede & Titan Forum What if Channel 5 produced Red Dwarf?

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  • #221005
    Jawscvmcdia
    Blocked

    Would it be called Red Dwarf or ‘Benefits Britain: In Space’? Synopsis: The tale of one man, Dave Lister, the last human being alive and his life being unemployed and on the dole, whilst being stranded three million years into the future, in space.?

    Episode 1: Lister must navigate his way using Starbug to the nearest Jobcentre to sign on, but is too drunk to drive.

    #221007
    Ridley
    Participant

    Why did you combine three separate people’s opinions into one though?

    #221008
    Dave
    Participant

    Hitler would be in it more regularly.

    #221009
    Plastic Percy
    Participant

    Largely the same, but with a naked Keith Chegwin.

    #221011
    Ian Symes
    Keymaster

    I’d be reading out tweets about it.

    #221017
    pfm
    Participant

    It’d be better than VII and VIII.

    #221020
    Ben Saunders
    Participant

    Isn’t that more of a Channel 4 stereotype, though?

    If Channel 5 made Red Dwarf, nobody would have seen it

    #221024
    Seb Patrick
    Keymaster

    Lister isn’t unemployed, he’s a third technician for the Jupiter Mining Corporation with a commission on their mining ship Red Dwarf.

    #221025
    Dave
    Participant

    Lister isn’t unemployed, he’s a third technician for the Jupiter Mining Corporation with a commission on their mining ship Red Dwarf.

    Not in this imaginary Channel 5 version, it seems.

    #221028
    Pete Part Three
    Participant

    Who lets a few facts get in the way of such biting social satire?

    #221029
    John Hoare
    Participant

    i am going to use this thread as an excuse to plug my article about working in Channel 5 TX.

    http://www.dirtyfeed.org/2015/08/24-hours-in-channel-5-tx/

    I have now used this thread as an excuse to plug my article about working in Channel 5 TX.

    #221041
    pfm
    Participant

    That is seriously one of the most interesting articles, and I’m not sure why I didn’t read it originally. I’ve often wondered what it must be like in the offices of any channel when ‘Normal service will resume shortly’ or equivalent title card has to be displayed, and also have the image of someone screaming ‘put the fucking tape in! The other one!’ and various obscenities and hair-pulling…

    #221043
    John Hoare
    Participant

    If you’re good, you calmly assess the situation and get the channel back on air as quickly as possible.

    If you’re bad, you yell FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK and wait for someone to rush in and save you.

    I hopefully do the former… these days.

    #221045

    John, that was a fascinating read. Thank you for using this thread as an excuse for plugging your article about working in Channel 5 TX

    #221059
    John Hoare
    Participant

    Ah, thank you!

    I am glad I used this thread as an excuse to plug my article about working in Channel 5 TX.

    #221151
    RickLee84
    Participant

    Inevitably, there will be a knock on the air lock door some day from a guy with a high court writ who’ll be looking payment or they will be seizing Kryten as a valuable asset to cover the debt owed

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