Asclepius

[Asclepius]

Paul Margs is a Doctor Who author who’s well respected in the world, and was also the guy who managed to coax Tom Baker back into doing the audios. He’s made a video about how he think the ending was meant to go before Millie Gibson didn’t remain for Series 2. It makes a *lot* of sense. And would have been amazing. The explanation only takes 3 minutes of your life…

[Asclepius]

Cross-post to Has Red Dwarf made you cwy?

[Asclepius]

I cried when they didn’t let the camera see Kryten’s polaroids in D.N.A.

[Asclepius]

8/10 – A good story with something special to it.

Dot and Bubble

Lucky Day

7/10  – Solid, good stories, no issues with these

Devil’s Chord

Boom

73 Yards (would have been 8, but for the confusing ending)

Legend of Ruby Sunday

Joy to the World

Robot Revolution

The Well

Story and the Engine

Song Contest

Wish World

Reality War

6/10  – Weaker stories, but fairly solid

Ruby Road

Space Babies

Rogue

Lux

4/10

Empire of Death

[Asclepius]

Wasn’t there a comment about “We’re about to start working on the thirs series” which was apparently edited put of his Graham Norton interview, though?

Re: the BTS stuff, I believe it’s been commented on that neither Mel nor Rose are present during it, suggesting a reshoot had taken place there.

I think Billie is The Face to be there as a) RTD knows she can keep a secret, b) it grabs headlines, c) it means the Doc isn’t just paused mid-regen, like Troughton. 

[Asclepius]

Apparently there’s a photo of a deleted scene circulating. Shows the Doc
and Belinda dancing at a party. Susan is also there apparently. The
suggestion is that it’s from the pre-reshoot end of the series finale,
before the reshoots were needed to lead up to the regeneration.
I’ve heard about this too, but it seems like the deleted scene was just an alternate ending, and Susan’s appearance was just another tease for the future (one she maybe wasn’t even physically present for) and not her playing any kind of actual role in the story. So we can file this under trivia and not something that earns RTD back any good will from me. (Unless it turns out they actually rewrote and reshot the entire story.)

I don’t know how much was reshot and rewritten, but it seems that so much was up in the air. Dialogue-wise, it really feels like it was meant to be Millie Gibson as the companion throughout both series, for a start.

As for Susan, certainly in the Unleashed footage, she’s wearing different clothes to the ones she was wearing in her scene inside the Doctor’s mind. Suggesting she was dressed for a different scene at some other point.

Weird, weird and frustrating. Over all I’ve really liked this series, but knowing it was meant to be something else leaves an odd feeling.

[Asclepius]

credit where it’s due – I said “stop teasing and just bring Susan back already” and they delivered on it.
OK, credit retracted. Fuck off, RTD.
It was my fault though honestly. I genuinely thought “yes, he spent a whole series teasing Susan only to pull the rug out from under us, but surely he wouldn’t have gone to the trouble of actually bringing Carole Ann Ford back to film a scene in the TARDIS where she implores The Doctor to find her, if that was literally all there was, and she wasn’t going to appear in let alone be important in the finale. It was delayed gratification but it’s definitely happening this time. He wouldn’t do the exact same rug pull twice” like a goddamn naive fool.
There has still been great stuff in this RTD2 era for sure, but if Doctor Who returns and Davies is still the head writer when it does, then my capacity to look forward to anything specific about the show is completely spent. It held out longer than it should have, really.

Apparently there’s a photo of a deleted scene circulating. Shows the Doc and Belinda dancing at a party. Susan is also there apparently. The suggestion is that it’s from the pre-reshoot end of the series finale, before the reshoots were needed to lead up to the regeneration.

Looking forward to reading the full details in 20 years time or so.

[Asclepius]

I was about to ask why they didn’t do a Tales of the TARDIS for The Three Doctors, but they did. They also did The Time Meddler, Curse of Fenric, Vengeance on Varos, Earthshock and The Mind Robber, so expect next season’s finale to be an adaptation of Legend of the Cybermen featuring Sil and The Meddling Monk opening a portal to the Fenric dimension or something.

I was holding on hope that the reason Tom Baker didn’t do a “Tales…” wasn’t for health reasons or anything, and that he was being held back to make an appearance in the ‘Pyramids of Mars’ one. Possibly alongside Ncuti. But sadly it wasn’t to be.

[Asclepius]

the Toymaker
Oh yeah, I should have mentioned that the specials culminated in the appearance of a villain from 1966.

I thought this worked tbh. We met the character. Saw his weirdness. Saw that he was scary and unnerving, and later on matched him against the Doctor. We *saw* that he was bad, rather than just being told it.

[Asclepius]

>Bring back Sutekh (last seen in 1975), Susan (1983), the Rani (1987), do a sequel to Midnight (2008), etc etc etc

That just sounds like he’s picking up directly where he left off after already doing Daleks, Cybermen, Masters, etc in the first round.

But with the Dalek, it was seeded so amazingly. Here is one Dalek. A damaged Dalek. It is trapped. Oh look, it’s killing everybody now, and you can’t stop it. And then bring it back – but LOADS of them – a few episodes later. Because you know they’re really scary. Because you’ve seen it. Not because you’ve been told it. Or that you’re being asked to go onto IPlayer to watch an Old Thing.

[Asclepius]

I can’t believe RTD didn’t manage to bring new viewers on board by kicking off the reboot with specials featuring the lead actor from three Doctors ago that picked up on plot points from 2008, before launching into a new series that built up a huge mystery that wasn’t resolved, with a climax based around a returning villain from 1975, all the while teasing a mystery woman who turned out to be a returning villain from 1987, whose big plan in the second season was to bring back a returning villain from 1983, all of which might help to finally explain the backstory of a supporting character from 1963.

Wasn’t it in Tennant’s second season that we had Family of Blood and we saw drawings in a book of some of his previous incarnations? That was a good pay-off and a nice hat-tip to fans of the olden days. That was enough. It was exciting. Or having multiple Doctors later, and rarely, and for cameos. That was fine too, as we know the Doctor has previous forms. Here are some others. Or bring back the Master and make it so scary and unexpected that even people who don’t know who he is – my kid, for one! – are scared. But this stuff with the Rani, Sutekh, Omega….it’s unearned. Things aren’t scary just because you say they are.

I could turn on the TV now and watch Turn Left for the fifth time, and I bet you I’ll be crying at one part of it. Either the Italians off to the concentration camp, or Donna realising she’s going to die. It’s brilliant writing. Astonishing. Where has that writer gone?

[Asclepius]

Quoting your gif, Warbodog.

Tbf Doug would probably tackle sci-fi incest more tastefully than Rob tackles penis torture.

Either way, they have form. That’s how The Holy Mother’s children procreated. 

And *anyway* there’s Ritaskabin and Michael to throw into the genetic pool, too!

[Asclepius]

are Lister and Kochanski’s kids going to reproduce with their siblings?

That’s the plot that I’m most interested in, to be perfectly honest.

[Asclepius]

Last Human
featuring 
Lister, Kochanski, Evil Lister, Mcgruder, other sundry Space Corp Marines and Cyberia prisoners, Kryten for a few pages and an implication of Kochanski’s pregnancy at the end?  
Am I missing anyone?

Yes, I mentioned this throughout the book club – not only is it the only novel which has more than one regular human character, there are four main human characters. Doug clearly loved the title so much he had to stick with it (or it was contractual).
I always read Backwards third. Last Human could be a sequel to Backwards, and also has a very definitive ending. So it’s more satisfying that way. 

I do like the ending to Last Human. Rimmer was ridiculously brave and gained the respect of his son. Lister and Kochanski have hope for kids. Kryten and Cat survive. I assume Cat survives. I don’t remember him being in the book much tbh! The planet itself sounds idyllic and they’re free from all of the awfulness they’ve faced in the book.

Also, Craig Charles does a much better job of reading Last Human on audio than Rob Grant does on Backwards (which I found a very difficult listen and chose to not continue with).

[Asclepius]

Backwards does leave things more open for sequels, which is why you can just write a sequel to Backwards and leave Last Human be. And I’m pretty sure it would be close to impossible to combine Last Human and Backwards into something coherent, even if actual people were doing it.

I wasn’t assuming you could actually generate something coherent out of it – just wondering how AI would strain to try and do so. It would probably read like Ulysses or a Thomas Pynchon novel or something. Or Everything Everywhere All At Once.

[Asclepius]

I wouldn’t want to ruin Backwards like that, I like it well enough. Even when you’re not laughing with Rob (e.g. if you’re not a complete psycho), you can enjoy laughing at him.
Contradictory sequels would be more of a problem in a series that didn’t explicitly feature alternate versions of the characters and literal universe hopping. It’s not narratively satisfying that we’re not following exactly the same versions of the characters from book to book, but the justification’s there.

Just feels like he sets it up for a sequel. Lister and Cat (whatever age they are – it’s unclear) arrive on a Red Dwarf that only has Rimmer and Kryten on it. Feels set up for more. Coming soon out of buttskis, perhaps.

Contradictory sequels. That would make a good flow-chart. The TV series as we know it, the novels into Rob’s fork, and the novels into Doug’s fork.

Somewhere else, of course, the TV series does deviate from itself, too. The events of Stasis Leak (Lister marrying Kochanski) don’t happen, for example.

And whatever universe we’re watching after ‘Only the Good….’ too…

[Asclepius]

No, you’re not *The* Last Human. *The* Last Human is the unfinished (and possibly unstarted) third Grant Naylor novel.

I vote we use AI to take all of ‘Last Human’ and all of ‘Backwards’ and combine them into one ‘coherent’ novel.

My head canon was always that Backwards was the third book anyway. It’s easier to bridge the gap between that book and Last Human (add Kochanski) than it would be to bridge the gap between Last Human and Backwards (which are, frankly, insurmountable).

Backwards feels like it was written to have sequels.

Last Human feels like it was written to kill the chance of any sequels.

[Asclepius]

Last Human
featuring 
Lister, Kochanski, Evil Lister, Mcgruder, other sundry Space Corp Marines and Cyberia prisoners, Kryten for a few pages and an implication of Kochanski’s pregnancy at the end?  
Am I missing anyone?

Ultra-supra-pro-pre-antepenultimate Human.

I had, at first, obviously presumed the ‘Last Human’ was Lister  – as he is throughout. But couldn’t it also refer to McGruder and his own experiences? Does he not think he is the last,until he finds out otherwise?

I enjoyed Last Human more in late 1995 (presumably I bought it new) than I enjoyed Backwards more the next year. I get the arguments around why the latter book is better, but it’s hard to get around my own initial feelings about them.

[Asclepius]

Better Than Life will be your friend for these, if you have access to them.

I do not. I was attempting to do a public service by trawling the British Newspaper Archive, but if the Better Than Life fanzines have already published that info, then I’ll leave it to someone else to stick them on here. Or on wiki. Or both!

Thanks for pointer, and saving me from more work procrastination.

[Asclepius]

Sources:

Daily Express 8/10/88 for Thanks for the Memory.

Express 9/12/89 for Marooned

Duct Soup – Lincolnshire Echo – 22/2/97

Nanarchy. Same publication 22/3/97.

Many thanks to Keir Starmer’s policy team for the loan of the 1980s Daily Express newspapers. 

[Asclepius]

As I thought, all is possible with the power of HTML and Code View! Just copy the ‘img’ element from the DOM, wrap it in ‘blockquote’ tags, and you’re away.

This sounds sexual and I don’t wish to partake.

[Asclepius]

Again, the quote function fails me.

Robert could make a fair bit by being a decent person and auctioning these for a good cause. Similar to what Linehan did recently, except replace the words ‘decent’ and ‘good’ with other words.

[Asclepius]

I think being nostalgic for the final moments before the post-recession endless shift to the right is just about the opposite of unreasonable.

I was 13 at the time and not fully able to appreciate that. You don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone. I only really noticed everything sliding into fascist shit starting around 2015 with the very open racism being flung around, then it was transphobia and now we’re on to good, old-fashioned gay bashing once again. It’s fun to watch all the people/corporations who used to be performatively woke because it made them money pivot to the right. Maybe it will open some people’s eyes to how hollow it all is.

I find it really hard to listen to podcasts/commentaries or anything from Before Those Times. 2016, Brexit and Trump. Or even the Covid-cut-off. I like listening to old Dwarfcasts, but when the casters are speaking to me from The Before Times, it feels very out of sync with life as we know it. Same with old Buxton or Herring podcasts. Yes, I’d like to hear this person, but telling me about life in 2015 might as well be a museum piece. But not far back enough to be interesting enough to be in an actual museum.

[Asclepius]

I think the truth is that the in-story logic (around why the Timelords and Gallifrey are all gone) is always going to be a bit shaky, especially in a show where time travel exists and offers so many potential get-outs.
The real reason they’re gone is for the good of the show. The Doctor is far more interesting when he’s a unique, lone timelord making his way through the universe, and it means that when they do want to introduce timelords and ladies (like the Master or the Rani or whoever), it makes much more of an impact when it’s a rare occurence. 

I’d 100% remembered that the Time Lords had been wiped out in the Time War, but also remembered about the 50th, where we found they hadn’t actually be wiped out. That’s why it seemed off for Ncuti to be mentioning himself being ‘the last of them’ again. Wasn’t ’til I went on a forum and remembered about The Timeless Children where all the Timelords become Cybermen and then…die? Which I hadn’t remembered, despite having watched it with my own eyes and listened to it with my ears.

[Asclepius]

Can’t seem to quote gifs on here. But I appreciate the Asclepius one. Yeah, guilty of the first I suppose. Fell down a rabbit hole and got nosey. Although the las time I got nosey about where someone lived, I came across this gem, so my nosing around is clearly of value.  

Probably moaning about cancel-culture.

[Asclepius]

Ah! That sense of relief that someone got it. Thanks :)

Not obvious what I’m quoting from! Nick R and the Simpsons gif.

[Asclepius]

He’s at least four and a half billion years old.

Has it ever been mentioned whether or not he technically a) aged during ‘Heaven Sent’ and/or b) remembers the full events of it (or just the last iteration)?

[Asclepius]

I suppose if I had said Doctor Who was more popular than Red Dwarf, I would have got away with it. I’m sorry I opened my mouth. I’m not anti-Rylan, anti-Who, or anti-Dwarf. I was not knocking it. I believe in Rylan, but not as one thing, not as an old man in the sky. I believe that what people call ‘Rylan’ is something in all of us. I’m sorry I said it, really. I never meant it to be a lousy anti-Rylan thing. If you want me to apologise, if that will make you happy, then OK, I’m sorry.

[Asclepius]

I think people forget that the show did still have a presence even when it wasn’t being actively produced during the nineties. There were repeats of old serials on TV, there was the McGann TV movie, there were plenty of other spinoff comics and books etc. – there was still plenty of Doctor Who stuff around.

I think it’s perfectly understandable to feel like you’ve been a lifelong fan of Doctor Who while also feeling like the reboot era is where your era of the show began. I’m a little older than Rylan is (so at a young age I was able to catch the tail end of the McCoy years, which is where my enjoyment of the show started) but definitely feel like there was still plenty of awareness of Doctor Who throughout the cancellation years.

I phrased it really badly, tbh. Wasn’t meant to be a put down of Rylan at all, who I genuinely like, and who I thought absolutely *nailed* the part.

More that getting ‘really into’ something at 17, and comparing it to the stories on the Dwarcasts of the three Dwarf-sketeers starting watching it at, what, eight or nine years old, reading Smegazines, setting up websites, coordinating conventions etc by a similar age. I went with ‘Back to Earth’ as a comparison because that’s probably the Eccleston-season equivalent in series terms. Just was slightly differently received, and had slightly fewer viewers.

[Asclepius]

Rude. Like 2 peas in a pod, Ian and Rylan are.
Also I must formally apologise to Rylan, as I have discovered his surname is spelled “Clark”. I deeply regret this unfortunate error.

In Doctor Who Unleashed, Rylan says he’s been a Who fan “all his life”. Since it came back. In 2005. When he was 17.

I would like to see someone try that schtick on Ian. “Yeah, I was there at the start! Back to Earth! I was 19 years old. It was amazing. ALL MY LIFE I’ve been in to it” and Ian’s biting his cheeks smiling gently, rocking slightly perhaps, focussing on the wall behind them.

[Asclepius]

The whole point about Earth being destroyed in May 2025 really sits weirdly with the Bad Wolf-esque current day pop culture inclusion. So I guess that in the Doctor Who canon, Rylan Clarke was forced into a cryogenic tube and shot into space in, what, April of this year?
I’ve spoken to him about this, he’s convinced he canonically becomes Cassandra somehow.

I would like to have been there for this conversation. Subject matter aside, you both have a very different vibe…

[Asclepius]

We literally went through this on discord…

I am in my mid 40s and have no idea what a discords are.

[Asclepius]

Having not read the books, hearing little tidbits and plot points on here makes them sound like the most insane things ever committed to paper. What the hell is going on over there in book land?

The purest, most undiluted form of Grant Naylor’s vision, frankly.

The first two are absolute classics. Take the day off work and get started.

[Asclepius]

It’s a rough night, I’ve got a fuckton of work to finish, and that was the lol I needed. Thank you!

[Asclepius]

I mean, it may have worked but it would have to be one hell of an amazing delivery without the rest of Timewave wrapped around it. If indeed, there was an original line and that was it.
(Also, I clicked this thread thinking the TW was for Timewave,)

TW. Trigger Warning. Just trying to be inclusive and didn’t want anyone to stumble on something potentially upsetting with those terms being used.

Although, for RD discussions, perhaps “TW: TW” would be relevant, too.

[Asclepius]

 “… fiendish oriental humour” 
I’m giving benefit of the doubt that the British Newspaper Archive search algorithm has AI’d some ancient racism in there for Robert.
          

No no, it was “…The Frank Chickens are a Japanese girl duo offer a bizarre cabaret-style mixture of fiendish oriental humour and disco”
The first people associated with Robert’s early days to have achieved some level of fame!

The Frank Chickens main front, Kazuko Hohki would later record The Fall. She is married to Grant Showbiz, the producer of some of The Fall’s very first albums, which were nearly flawless masterpieces which stand up well many years later. After a couple of short breaks, he would return to record them years later, despite the lack of the other key personalities of those early years, despite the writing standard having declined, and them performing to smaller and smaller audiences as those members who stayed the course became wizened parodies of their earlier selves, dragging themselves onstage despite increasing physical infirmities, physically assaulting people who were just trying to do their jobs, and spouting hard-right nonsense about immigrants and the woke.
I’m sorry, that got away from me.

[Asclepius]

 “… fiendish oriental humour” 

I’m giving benefit of the doubt that the British Newspaper Archive search algorithm has AI’d some ancient racism in there for Robert.

          

No no, it was “…The Frank Chickens are a Japanese girl duo offer a bizarre cabaret-style mixture of fiendish oriental humour and disco”

The first people associated with Robert’s early days to have achieved some level of fame!

[Asclepius]

 “… fiendish oriental humour” 

I’m giving benefit of the doubt that the British Newspaper Archive search algorithm has AI’d some ancient racism in there for Robert.

[Asclepius]

Yes, at the time it was speculated that it may have been a rewrite from “slit her wrist”.
Not that it’s much funnier, but at least the premise of the joke is slightly more functional.

‘It has all the functions of a joke, without actually being one’.

[Asclepius]

I was looking for the first reference to the comedian Robert Llewelyn

Obvs! Thanks for spotting that – as I didn’t. Either way, those are our first two references to him by that name…

[Asclepius]

Seven days beforehand…

“… fringe venues like The Comic Strip and the Comedy Store It features Jim Barclay Jock McLog and McNikki Cathy Creme and The Joeys Unknown all But how long will be before their names are fashionably dropped from the lips of the avant garde and with it And …”

All unknown. I wonder if anything ever became of future stars like Jock McLog?

Interesting that the name of Chris Eymard goes against the wikipedia quote of “started performing professionally with the group alongside Bernie Evans, Nigel Ordish and Graham Allum”

[Asclepius]

18/10/83 – The Stage

“… music by Alistair Collingwood (New Brewd Productions, features Dana Gillespie), the Joeys IBernie Evans, Robert Llewellyn, Chris Eymard. Nigel Ordish). Circuit 5 Ubu 0 and Ubu OO by Hermann von Harten (Freie Theateranst8lt); A Coupla White Chicks Sitting …”

Don’t know why RL didn’t come up on my first search…

[Asclepius]

I was looking for the first reference to the comedian Robert Llewelyn, and there’s this word salad from the Bristol Evening post 17/10/85

“… fiendish oriental humour and disco music Their name comes from English writing Japanese pencil! Blah are Chris Eymard and Robert Llewelyn former of comedy group Tickets from the Albany Centre or the Hall organisers of an amateur show about an old part of Bristol …”

Can’t find a reference to him being in ‘Blah’ but Chris Eymard was an early co-writer of his.

[Asclepius]

Okay, then I still don’t get this from his interview in the last Smegazine covered, discussing The Reconstructed Heart:
TS: You used your own name rather than a pseudonym.RL: It’s just Robert Llewellyn.TS: It wouldn’t have been the same thrill seeing the book otherwise would it?RL: No. I wanted my name on it!
They seem to know he goes by a pseudonym, but then respond as if he isn’t.

Fascinating! Has he *ever* publicly gone by his original name? I know it’s widely known that Chris Barrie is actually Chris Brown, but I’ve not seen the same suggestion for Robert.

[Asclepius]

Yep, Llewellyn is a stage name. 

*Gasp!*

Not even mentioned on his wiki. I like how it’s been generated from his actual name.

So we have Alan, Barry, Charles, Charles again, Chris, Craig, Danny, John, Jules, Llewelyn and Robert to now make up our ‘everyone has multiple first names’ conceit. Fun!

[Asclepius]

Meant to add, ‘Charles Allen’ doesn’t sound *entirely* dissimilar to ‘Llewelyn’…

[Asclepius]

If everyone including Lister was killed in the radiation leak presumably Holly would revive Hollister as a hologram, who could decide to head for Earth and so you could still have Kryten as well as Cat, Holly and Hollister.
As for what the OP actually asked, simply write out Lister after Tikka where he gets beaten to death by the other three at the end.

I don’t think Holly would/does do that though. He only resurrects Rimmer shortly before/after Lister, doesn’t he? I know it’s not stated specifically in the series, but in the book Rimmet comes ‘back’ a few weeks after Dave.

Hollister doesn’t seem to have been something that Holly ever considered.

[Asclepius]

I think the stuff on the Garbage Planet is probably the best stuff in any of the books that wasn’t used in a TV episode.

But I also prefer Last Human to Backwards.

[Asclepius]

I don’t think it’d make the best TV to be honest.

Scene: Stasis booths

LISTER: Is this going to hurt?

TODHUNTER: Haven’t you ever travelled interstellar?

LISTER: No.

TODHUNTER: Oh, you don’t feel a thing. The stasis room creates a static field of time. See, just as X-rays can’t pass through lead, time cannot penetrate a stasis field. So, although you exist, you no longer exists in time, and for you time itself does not exist. You see, although you’re still a mass, you are no longer an event in space-time, you are a non-event mass with a quantum probability of zero.

LISTER: Oh. Simple as that, eh?

TODHUNTER opens the door, and LISTER steps inside.

LISTER: OK, I’m ready.

TODHUNTER: See you in 18 months.

TODHUNTER closes the door

TODHUNTER: (To HOLLY) Holly, activate the stasis field.

HOLLY (distracted): Spit on her wrist?

TODHUNTER walks off, not having heard.

We see LISTER waving through a window in the door. He continues to wave.

SET: Drive Room

Captain HOLLISTER is yelling at RIMMER who is standing at attention. A few random officers stand in the back.

HOLLISTER:  Look, it was your job to fix it, Rimmer! You can’t do sloppy work on the drive plate!

RIMMER: I know, sir, and I accept full responsibility for *any* consequences. (Executes a Full-Rimmer salute.)

A blinding white light glares and everyone is blown across the room by a tremendous wind. The white light rushes through the rest of the ship, including the stasis booths, none of which were activated.

HOLLY: Emergency. There’s an emergency going on. It’s still going on. Will Arnold J. Rimmer please hurry to white corridor 159. This is an emergency announcement.

We see RIMMER as he is thrown against a wall, screaming

RIMMER: aaaaiiiiiiiuuuuurrrrghhhhh… Gazpacho soup.

RIMMER is blown out of shot until only his arm is visible which falls into the shattered remains of a snow flurry paperweight (echoes of “Citizen Kane”).

CAPTION: 3,000,000 years later

An air vent falls off the wall, and a guy dressed in a pink suit climbs out of the duct.  This is the CAT.  He does a somersault and three twirls.

CAT: Aaahhh, ooowww, eee!  How am I looking?  (He pulls out a small mirror.) Looking nice.  No, wait a minute.  I’m looking better than nice.  I’m looking dangerous.  Aaaoooww, dangerous!  Aaaooowww!  Hey, what’s that?  Oh, it’s my shadow.  Hey, even my shadow’s looking  nice!  I’m looking nice, my shadow’s looking nice — what a team!  We are unbelievable!  OK, team, this way.  (He points in one direction and then changes his mind) No, this way.  Aaaooowww, yeah.  (He reaches an intersection) This way!

Another corridor.

The CAT spins into view.

Suddenly the CAT enters the bunkroom room, twirling and howling.

CAT: Aaahhh, ooohhh, yeah– (Freezing as he notices a crease

CAT: (Noticing something on his sleeve) Whoa!  Crease!

CAT pulls out a small steam iron and runs it over the sleeve.

CREDITS ROLL.

[Asclepius]

We’re really getting a lot of mileage out of that quote in this thread.

Now, how the hell would we have coped without the SmegaDrive?

It’s insane that it’s taken 28 pages to get to the crux of his argument and to make it so succinctly. Well done. I think you’ve won the thread.

[Author]

Replies