Ian Symes

[Ian Symes]

Very hit and miss, but when it hit it *really* hit. I adored the bit where Michael Caine turned up in the back of Bob Hoskins’s shot. And ‘the worst man’ was fucking brilliant.

[Ian Symes]

:-(

[Ian Symes]

God, it’s worse than that Mick, he’s a fucking moron.

[Ian Symes]

From the first novel: ?The only drawback, as far as Holly could see, was that women would have to be banned from playing the cello unless they had birthing stirrups, or elected to play it side-saddle.?

The side-saddle thing is also mention in the Son of Clich? sketch about Sir Kevin Kevin Sir.

[Ian Symes]

I was really looking forward to watching it2i2. I wanted to grab a DVD there and then, but by the time visitor #96 (me) in the queue got to bobbyllew, it2i2 was sold out.

Probably due to the fact that most people are selfish cunts who don’t abide by the entirely fair and simple staggered system.

[Ian Symes]

Never mind that, when is the Blue Midgit page on TOS going to be updated?

[Ian Symes]

It’s a small price to pay.

[Ian Symes]

> Doctor Black (Murder Victim)

Colin Baker did it. Mystery solved.

[Ian Symes]

Philip J Reed – the first person ever, on an American news report, to use the word ‘delineate’.

[Ian Symes]

My CUNTING Sky+ didn’t tape it, because of a SHITTING power cut.

[Ian Symes]

Don’t give me that Star Trek crap, it’s too early in the morning.

[Ian Symes]

If you’re going to start being sarky to perfectly good people for no reason, you can piss off.

[Ian Symes]

But Tonguetied it wasn?t a big mistake on Doug or Veale?s part because it was in a Series V episode. And then done to the VII models, along with the viewscreen alternations. Chris just copied the model – as the DVDs raw FX reel (not to mentions hots from the eps themselves) show.

Never mind all this, when are you going to update the Blue Midget page?

[Ian Symes]

It was fuck all to do with Chris Veale. At DJ last year, I was speaking to Alan ‘Rocky’ Marshall about it, and he said it was a decision made at the model-making stage to make it more insect-like. The idea was that they’d be vertical when Starbug was at rest, and horizontal on take-off.

[Ian Symes]

People *are* assured of a warm welcome on here, just as long as they’re not twats.

[Ian Symes]

You dirty bastard.

I’m guessing… no.

[Ian Symes]

That’s good, Phil, thanks. Cappsy, what do you think about this topic?

[Ian Symes]

*glares*

[Ian Symes]

Already have done.

[Ian Symes]

around 2 million for Only The Good

Are you sure about that figure? The REPEAT was moved due to tennis, as was Pete 2?s, but the original went out in the regular slot and I?m pretty sure did better than 2 million?

Are you just guessing at stuff now? :-)

Like I say, figures were from memory, but OTG was around that level. Because of the repeats for Pete 2 and OTG being moved, the figures were down, because figures for repeats that were shown in the same week got added to the original broadcast figure. I am absolutely, a hundred per cent certain, though, that the original broadcast of Only The Good was shifted to the Monday night (a mere four days after Pete Part Two) due to golf coverage on the Thursday night. I have the Radio Times cuttings to prove it, but unfortunately no working scanner.

[Ian Symes]

I like the way that all the funniest bits are in bold, for the busy housewife or businessman.

[Ian Symes]

From memory…

Stoke Me A Clipper got the biggest rating ever, something like 8.5 million. VIII started off at 8.2 million, and then dwindled to around 2 million for Only The Good, although that can be put down to the fact that it was shifted in the schedules to Monday night due to golf.

[Ian Symes]

I would, as long as his actual brains were made of actual smegma.

[Ian Symes]

I’m trying to come up with a bumsex joke, but I just can’t.

[Ian Symes]

Have you met the kettle?

[Ian Symes]

Because, from the looks of it, there?s no editorial work at all – anyone can just submit stuff, and so it?s filled with utter bollocks.

Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

[Ian Symes]

> Ian had the Gunmen theme for his ringtone at one point, which I sadly thought was pretty cool.

Oh yeah! Back in the monophonic days. I had the Observation Dome music on my recently deceased phone. On my new one, I have a midi file of the Emerald Hill Zone music from Sonic 2. Thus I win.

[Ian Symes]

With all due respect, ‘toungetied’, it’s not up to any individual user of this G&T (even those of us who run it) to determine what the site “should” be about. The idea that we need your contribution to keep this site “fresh and intriguing” is unusual, and a little insulting. We like to think we host a little bit of everything on G&T – serious, silly, talking about the series, the books, things the cast have done, and things that are only vaguely connected to the show. That goes for both the main site and the forum. And don’t forget that a forum thread isn’t the same as an article.

Personally, I enjoyed the debate put forward in your initial post, and was pleased to see a piece of Dwarf mythos talked about. I hope you continue to post things of that standard, but please don’t do so under the basis that you want to change the way the balance we offer on G&T works.

Also, it’s ‘Tongue’.

[Ian Symes]

Did you eat the Corgi models?

[Ian Symes]

Or see DEAD WOMEN HANGING FROM TREES.

[Ian Symes]

Paul Alexander is wrong about Men Behaving Badly. I reckon the last few series were the best.

[Ian Symes]

If you look at what Rob and Doug had in mind – a Reverend-Jim-esque fried-brain loser, out of shape, washed-up, unable to woo Kochanski but with a certain charm and likeability – there is a performer who fits the bill:

Craig Charles, before rehab.

[Ian Symes]

As well as the difficulty in raising the money in the first place, there’s also a whole mountain of legal shite regarding investment and ownership. It would be a nightmare.

[Ian Symes]

I’ll give you that one – while the power cell had been seen before, there was no indication whatsoever that it would be somehow capable of wiping out a dozen Cyberbastards. I’ve got no problem whatsoever with the reset button in LotTL, though. It make sense within the story – the Toclafane can only exist through a paradox, destroy the thing that created the paradox and they’ll be gone – and it makes sense dramatically too. You can’t have future contemporary Earth stories taking place on a decimated, post-apocalyptic world.

[Ian Symes]

I was hoping I’d wake up to find this was all a bad dream.

Fuck.

I’m now looking forward to Torchwood more than Doctor Who.

[Ian Symes]

Doctor Who is ruined.

[Ian Symes]

It’d be on BBC3 post-watershed, and have lots of strong language and gratuitious sex scenes, in place of actual characters or plots. You could call it Fred Ward.

[Ian Symes]

Fun Fact: nobody who uses the phrase ‘deus ex machina’ as a criticism of something on the internet actually knows what the phrase ‘deus ex machina’ means.

And I LOVE Jack?s hidden weapon

Ooh, pardon.

[Ian Symes]

This is all building up to the reveal that DNA didn’t die in 2001 – he regenerated into RTD.

(Bah, typing that made me think how awesome it’d be to have Douglas Adams writing for the revived series. It’d definitely have happened. Ecclestone and/or Tennant acting from a Douglas Adams script… cor.)

[Ian Symes]

Hmm, editing posts moves them down the list. My ‘WRONG’ post was in reference to Arlene not liking Father’s Day. In the interests of fairness:

Karl: WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG

*punches Karl in the face*

WRONG.

[Ian Symes]

The mistake we made, Karl, was trying to instigate a game in the pub.

[Ian Symes]

Arlene: WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG

*punches Arlene in the face*

WRONG.

[Ian Symes]

It’s not moved to Channel 4, it’s gone to five. Simpsons repeats are unaffected.

[Ian Symes]

Girly, shirt-lifting tosspiece.

[Ian Symes]

Maybe not huge commercial successes, but the likes of Dad’s Army and The Likely Lads were converted into very good movie versions. The League of Gentlemen’s Apocalypse is a more recent example. But the myth, especially over here in the UK, is that any sit-com that brings out a movie version is going to be rubbish. Cliches such as all the characters going on a foreign holiday (Are You Being Served), or a character being mistaken for a gangster (Only Fools and Horses) tend to cloud the question of whether the film-length version is funny.

On a side-note, the term “Britcom” annoys me – as if being British is a genre in itself. That’s like saying Friends is the same as Wondershowzen.

[Ian Symes]

There’s no official watershed for radio, it’s up to the broadcaster to be responsible. Radio 1 have got in trouble for bad language on the breakfast show – slap bang in the middle of the school run – but, like you say, midday on Radio 4 you’d be able to get away with it, as there’ll be no kids listening. Well, I used to listen to Radio 4 all day whenever I was off school, but I’m weird.

[Ian Symes]

Be sure to keep us informed if you see any other people.

[Ian Symes]

> Hartnell to Tom Baker were ?Doctor Who? and Davison to McCoy (and McGann in the TV Movie, I think) were ?The Doctor.?

To cloud matters further, Davidson is credited as Doctor Who just the once – at the end of Logopolis.

[Ian Symes]

Are you a horse belonging to Peter Withe?

[Ian Symes]

He’s credited as “The Doctor”, you big twat.

[Author]

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