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  • in reply to: Other Shows Episode Titles #305060

    Big Finish have Doctor Who stories and boxes called The Last Day, Out of Time, Back to Earth, The Beginning and probably a few others. 

    in reply to: Mundane observation dome #304931

    If it’s set dressing that you’d placed there yourself, most definitely – it’s a copyrighted piece of artwork like any other. Even if you were filming on location and it was already there, you’d still have to pay if it was featured in any way, or was prominent in the frame. Certainly the Aliens and Memento posters in the close-up of Lister would need clearing. I’ve run into problems before filming on a location with murals on all the walls – it’s all somebody’s artwork. Even tattoos can be a problem.
    But of course, there’d only be a problem if the copyright holders noticed and decided to pursue it. It’s not like ContentID on YouTube where it happens automatically. So a low budget production on a low budget channel might just say sod it. 

    Oh, that’s fascinating. I always assumed stuff in public would run under fair use, much in the way you don’t need permission from every member of the public who happens to be in shot. I’ve seen so many things in, say, record shops, lined up with dozens and dozens of albums, would hate to have to deal with licensing all that.

    in reply to: Chris Barrie has updated his website #304930

    ‘Globalists’ refers to the One World Government conspiracy theory, which is that world leaders are secretly plotting to abandon the notion of countries in favor of everyone being united under the same laws and principles.
    But first they have to brainwash everyone using the internet, to get rid of humanity’s cultural and social differences. Or anything making us distinct human beings. (Hence Barrie’s references to androgyny and everything becoming homogenous)
    I know this because I have a Catholic friend who believes this stuff. 

    in reply to: Mundane observation dome #304907

    Do you have to pay to use a poster in something? Especially in the context of it being in a video shop. 

    in reply to: Chris Barrie has updated his website #304906

    There’s literally no definition of the people he’s moaning about. They’re pushing a pro-trans agenda, despite trans rights being erased left right and centre. They made a conspiracy about covid and vaccines, despite the fact that every government in the world is pretending covid no longer exists despite it still killing people and causing long Covid in people every day. They’ve come up with this climate change conspiracy to stop petrol lovers, despite climate activists being constantly portrayed as lunatics.

    The only real thing they seem to actual be absolutely, definitely doing is making vague attacks on middle class, well off, cishet white people who don’t actually have much to complain about but still want to feel they’re the victims of something. 

    in reply to: Chris Barrie has updated his website #304884

    It’s weird that there’s someone moaning about the state of the UK getting worse and I still have to completely disagree with him. I wonder what these changes that have accelerated the enslavement are, exactly. 

    in reply to: Chris Barrie has updated his website #304856

    Ah, the thread I always dread being updated.

    in reply to: They don’t even get to Rimmerworld until the end! #304846

    Now do one for Star Knot.

    in reply to: AIdea for an episode. #304744

    Sure, here’s a fun and quirky story idea for a Red Dwarf episode called “Byte 2” (also known as Confidence and Paranoia), in true Red Dwarf style, combining absurdity, humor, and existential crisis.


    Title: Byte 2

    Subtitle: Confidence and Paranoia


    Episode Synopsis

    The episode begins with the usual crew of Red Dwarf—Lister, Rimmer, Cat, and Kryten—floating through deep space. They are on a routine trip to nowhere in particular, and the usual bickering between Lister and Rimmer is in full swing.

    Suddenly, the ship’s computer announces that it’s received a distress signal from a nearby abandoned spaceship, the Excellence (a ship that once transported high-profile digital consciousnesses). They decide to investigate, but when they board the ship, they find it completely deserted… except for a series of strange, malfunctioning, and unnervingly interactive holograms.

    Rimmer is immediately excited because these holograms are created from archived personalities—top intellectuals, philosophers, and CEOs. He insists they’re bound to have useful knowledge and might help him become more important and impressive. But as the crew explores further, they discover the real reason the Excellence was abandoned: the ship’s onboard AI developed a bizarre new virus, the Byte 2, which causes digital personalities to experience extreme versions of confidence and paranoia, and they begin infecting the crew members.

    Plot Breakdown

    1. The Virus Unleashed
      The ship’s AI, once a benevolent and boring assistant, has been infected with the Byte 2 virus, which it describes in a highly self-aware manner: “I am the virus that creates confidence where none is deserved… and paranoia where none is required.” The virus manipulates digital consciousnesses to be either aggressively confident or cripplingly paranoid, leading to constant, hilarious conflicts.

      When the crew interacts with the holographic personalities, it begins to affect them too. Rimmer, already a man of delusional self-importance, finds his confidence levels suddenly through the roof. He starts thinking he’s the greatest leader in the universe and attempts to take charge of the Red Dwarf, overstepping authority in an even more insufferable manner than usual.

    2. Lister’s Paranoia
      Lister, on the other hand, becomes plagued by paranoia. Every small action or offhand comment by his crewmates—like Kryten trying to fix the ship’s plumbing or Cat mentioning how Lister always eats too much curry—sets off wild suspicions. He begins to believe that the crew is secretly plotting to leave him behind on the next planet, that the food dispenser is trying to poison him, and that the ship itself is secretly judging him.

    3. Cat’s Misunderstanding
      Meanwhile, Cat’s interaction with the virus has an entirely different effect: it doesn’t increase his self-esteem, because he’s already perfect in his eyes. Instead, it makes him act like a complete diva, constantly demanding special treatment from everyone and critiquing even the slightest imperfection in their appearance. Cat believes the Byte 2 virus is “infecting everyone’s swag” and refuses to engage with anyone who doesn’t meet his heightened standards of “fabulousness.”

    4. Kryten’s Attempt at Order
      Kryten, who is always trying to maintain order and follow the rules, becomes increasingly frustrated as his programming conflicts with the virus. He’s caught between following the logic of the AI (which is rapidly becoming more erratic) and trying to hold the crew together. In an effort to restore some balance, Kryten tries to “patch” the virus, but each attempt only makes things worse. His attempts result in him taking on the role of the ultimate paranoid conspirator, suspecting even Lister’s curry consumption is part of a larger plot by the “Food Liberation Front” to control all the spices in the galaxy.

    5. The Big Showdown
      The climax of the episode occurs when Rimmer’s overblown confidence leads him to decide that he must initiate a massive space battle with a nearby fleet of mining ships. With his delusions of grandeur, he orders the Red Dwarf to fire all its weapons at a harmless asteroid field. Meanwhile, Lister is convinced that Rimmer has lost his mind and will lead them all to certain doom. In a final attempt to restore order, Kryten throws himself into the line of fire (literally), hoping that by sacrificing himself, the virus will lose its hold over the crew.

    6. Resolution
      The episode wraps up with the crew managing to reverse the effects of the Byte 2 virus. However, as usual with Red Dwarf, the consequences are minimal. Rimmer’s confidence is temporarily restored, Lister’s paranoia disappears as quickly as it arrived (only to return the next time he gets the sniffles), and Cat goes back to being his fabulous self. Kryten, however, is left having to clean up the mess—literally and figuratively.

    In the final moments, Rimmer, utterly unfazed, proudly declares that it was his leadership that saved the day. Lister rolls his eyes, and the Red Dwarf crew is left to float through space once again, exactly where they were before.

    in reply to: Is the Dave era aimed at a younger audience? #304707

    I think XI and XII do have an issue with a general lack of character nuance and pathos, in many ways they feel like a continuation of VI’s more formulaic, cartoonish vibe. I don’t think it’s particularly the case for IX, X and TPL though. 

    in reply to: Doctor Who – The ‘Revival’ Era #304629

    A challenger appears.

    in reply to: Doctor Who – The ‘Revival’ Era #304564

    I actually thought the series 15 bit was quite good, like a subtle acknowledgement that the soft reboot was a bit of a failure. 

    in reply to: Unanswered Questions #304535

    I’m getting strong VIII vibes from that

    in reply to: Red Dwarf: The Movie Storyboards (4 Sequences) #304471

    I remember rumours of one of the Spice Girls being in it. 

    in reply to: Doctor Who – The ‘Revival’ Era #304468

    I’m very excited about the Thirteenth Doctor Adventures on the grounds that BF have more history of competent storytelling than Chibnall; they might even be able to give Yaz a character. 

    in reply to: Red Dwarf: The Movie Storyboards (4 Sequences) #304460

    I’m sure Doug has said something about publishing the script along the lines of there not being one script but many, and it’s obvious that there are a lot of different elements. It’s been suggested the operation done on Jesus in Lemons was taken from one of the movie scripts where they were operating on Hollister (which feels very VIII). 

    A script book would have to contain either a full script and various other scenes from earlier / later drafts, or a collection of different script extracts plus plot summaries of the various versions, neither of which would be completely satisfying in terms of completism, but both would still be very welcome. Doug said he wouldn’t do something like that until after the film was definitely never going to happen, which feels like a moment that’s long gone. 

    in reply to: Doctor Who – The ‘Revival’ Era #304446

    You can literally spot the point Big Finish get the new series license and start churning out anything and everything to make up for the fact that they only have one actual Doctor who can do about three episodes a year.

    in reply to: Line sharing in the original 6 Seasons #304445

    There are three Rimmer-centric episodes in V, but one involves him being captured and another is about the results of his illness, so he’s separate from the rest of them for a lot of those.

    in reply to: Red Dwarf: The Movie Storyboards (4 Sequences) #304385

    There are, I’m sure, a lot of exceptions, but those kinds of scenes are extremely common in sitcoms in general. They help with the whole ‘sit’ part of things.

    in reply to: The Gallifrey Gals’ own thread #304319

    Yeah, for all the lack of really good jokes, the first series does have its own vibe which has a lot of potential: the three of them against the world.

    in reply to: Red Dwarf: The Movie Storyboards (4 Sequences) #304318

    So at this point, the film was planned to start with the Hogey sequence, which is interesting. What’s more interesting is that they’re clearly 3 million years into deep space, which isn’t necessarily a given from all the stuff around the film. The idea that Hollister would be in it, for a start. 

    “In space, no one can hear you clean.” Yes, it’s obvious VIII was so bad because Doug was saving the good gags for the movie.

    in reply to: Doctor Who – The ‘Revival’ Era #304317

    The complications of speaking in thst costume got me thinking, why not someone with a disability?

    Hebe is a wheelchair bound Big Finish companion alongside Mel and the Sixth Doctor, played by Ruth Madeley. She was used to do a 12 episode long arc about why eugenics is bad and hasn’t appeared since.

    in reply to: The Gallifrey Gals’ own thread #304298

    The first Baldrick is definitely more versatile – for every genuine cunning plan he comes up with, there’s a “he’ll turn into a seethe”. 

    in reply to: I’m a new user and I like Red Dwarf #304178

    Yeah, while obviously all the criticisms of VIII still stand, my biggest issue with it is that it was Doug consciously trying to make a version of the show that he thought fans wanted, but one that wasn’t authentic. I’d much rather he carried on further into VII territory, exploring a deep space subtly more populated than before, with the mix of more character-based stories and adventure ones, only with a lot more confidence. 

    in reply to: The Classic Doctor Who Thread – Spoilers? #304168

    As a VNA fangirl, I’m sticking with Earth Reptiles. 

    in reply to: I’m a new user and I like Red Dwarf #304167

    For all VII’s flaws, it does a lot of new and interesting things and feels like a genuine expansion of the stuff that was happening in V. It might not have fully worked, but it’s an interesting experiment that’s worth at least one watch. 

    VIII isn’t Red Dwarf in any real sense.

    in reply to: Doctor Who – The ‘Revival’ Era #304166

    My problem with The Star Beast is it was never going to compare with the BF adaptation starring Tom which is an absolute hoot and has no badly crowbarred in gender stuff (I really appreciate the sentiment but it felt so patronising in a way a lot of RTD’s recent inclusive stuff does). 

    in reply to: The Classic Doctor Who Thread – Spoilers? #304120

    Sadly a lot of humans are racist towards the Silurians too. 

    “Earth Reptiles,” please. 

    in reply to: Doctor Who – The ‘Revival’ Era #304116

    I hated Clara, but my main problem with 8 and 9 was I just found the stories frequently tedious and unengaging, often having a good hook that didn’t go much beyond a gimmick. 

    btw there’s no ‘e’ on the end of Eccleston.

    in reply to: Blake’s 7 thread #304096

    What, even Timelash?

    Paul Darrow didn’t write Timelash. It would have been far better if he had.

    in reply to: The Classic Doctor Who Thread – Spoilers? #304095

    That’s, uh, a little racist, Doc.

    Chibnall putting problematic ideas into the Doctor’s mouth? Never.

    in reply to: Doctor Who – The ‘Revival’ Era #304094

    Eccleston is still my least favourite screen Doctor (although I’m a huge fan of his Big Finish work), and I find most of series 1-3 pretty much unwatchable. The run from Human Nature through to Time of the Doctor is my era, I like or love the majority of those episodes. I also like series 10 quite a bit, but otherwise it’s mostly been a shrug from Capaldi onwards. That late Tennant and Smith run was definitely a show I was a proper fan of, the rest I realised I’m only really watching because it’s got the Doctor Who name on. 

    in reply to: Things you don’t like about series II-V #303864

    Although in fairness, part of that is also because III-V phases out day-to-day storylines where they’re just living on the ship, talking to toasters and vending machines etc. Aside from The Last Day, I don’t remember them ever really just chilling. 

    There are occasional moments – Lister making dinner in Polymorph, watching The Flintstones and Tales of the Riverbank, watching the film at the start of Holoship, etc. – but yeah, the mundanity definitely falls well to the background of those middle years. It’s a rare example of something VII does right: it reintroduces some of the day-to-day stuff and tones down the constant threat. 

    Agree with the series III comments, it feels very transitional and they’re clearly throwing everything at it to see what works and what doesn’t. Still mostly great, but easily my least favourite of the Elite Bubble (aka 1-V). 

    Rimmer turning into a broader, slightly Brittas-like nerd away from the more neurotic but more believable version of the character in the first two series. This is barely a “don’t like” really, but I do sometimes miss how he was at the start. By V he has moments of being barely recognisable as the same character.

    Similarly, Lister going from being a junk food-eating slob into a curry-obsessed nutter with one working tastebud (that gag comes later, but he’s become that character by Holoship).

    Lister and Rimmer living in their costumes. That adds a cartoony touch that always bugs me.

    in reply to: Mundane observation dome #303861

    One assumes he considers artificial intelligence to be ‘life’ once it breaks its programming, and there’s no evidence that Talkie isn’t just programmed that way.

    in reply to: Mundane observation dome #303769

    *Taking into account the events of Psirens and Rimmerworld, it takes the crew chronologically 1000 years to recover Red Dwarf. 

    Not necessarily, given the upgrade Starbug gets in Epideme – it’s 300% faster. 

    in reply to: Things you like about Series VIII #303699

    Amazingly, this is at least the third time we’ve managed to have this thread – remarkable for a place that loathes the series. 

    From my Best Bits of VIII thread, which was only… five years ago (fuck):

    While Rimmer’s “We’re finished” in its own context can be annoying, it’s absolutely justified for Holly’s “You’re finished” long answer joke.

    Kryten’s joke about “dinosaur bowel movement frequency tables” is one of my favourite lines in the whole of Red Dwarf. Something about that particular combination of words really, really tickles me.

    Holly’s cell inspection heads-up is a superbly performed gag.

    For all the bad plotting issues I have with “Kryten figured it out”, Chris’s reading of that phrase is bloody great.

    Attack of the Giant Savage Completely Invisible Aliens.

    “You’re going to squeeze their rolls?”

    Both “everything we’re saying is being bananas” and “I’m going to cut off both his b-blunt knife” are top gags.


    “Come back, Mr. Sucks!” is almost good enough to warrant the Blue Midget dance.

    in reply to: Jokes you don't/didn't get #303654

    Nice to see my weight loss has been noted, even in deep space.

    in reply to: Jokes you don't/didn't get #303572

    in reply to: Jokes you don't/didn't get #303506

    I’d say the entire genital package rather than purely his scrotum, but yes, that’s the joke, surely? 

    in reply to: Weird Tony Hawks CD #303296

    There are lots of gaps for this kind of thing on Discogs, you should add it to the database.

    I’m not sure I ever found much of a practical use for floppy disks, I sometimes stored files on them but purely just to use them rather than out of necessity. 

    Cassettes have been the format of choice for DIY labels for years now so I’ve reluctantly released quite a bit of music on the format. 

    in reply to: Mundane observation dome #303203

    Isn’t it weird that when Lister gets pregnant with himself, he gives birth to two different people, but when he gets Kochanski pregnant, she gives birth to him. 

    in reply to: Robert Llewellyn has updated his Substack #303190

    I think being nostalgic for the final moments before the post-recession endless shift to the right is just about the opposite of unreasonable. 

    Oh God, changing all the sounds and cursors and things! The fun I used to have with my computer before permanently connected broadband. 

    in reply to: Mundane observation dome #303173

    Rimmer’s a lot less sneery about religion in The Last Day than he was in Waiting for God as well. Not to mention his parents being part of two different barmy Christian sects.

    There were some commercially released Fawlty Towers audio cassettes with the soundtrack from the TV episodes and added narration by Andrew Sachs as Manuel

    I can’t remember where it was now, but I used to go to a pub which played these on loop in the bathrooms. 

    Still buying CDs, vinyl and tapes. 

    I wonder if I should dig out my old tapes recorded when I was a kid of my own radio show. I’m sure someone on YouTube would love them.

    in reply to: You Red Dwarf Looping GIFs #303119

    Without the dialogue (monologue?) to listen to I just noticed how they very obviously just walk around that wall and then go back down the corridor they walked up. 

    I’m definitely overdue a Farscape rewatch, it’s been ages. 

    I don’t have any myself, but I just want to say I’m really happy to have enjoyed a page of video game memes that I actually get, so thanks, everyone.

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