Forum Replies Created

Viewing 100 posts - 1 through 100 (of 2,595 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265835

    IT’S A NAME I MADE UP, TWO Ns ACTUALLY

    Rimmer takes credit for the origins of the Irish name.

    in reply to: “They’ve got a better union than us” #265831

    Yeah his background doesn’t exactly scream union rep … but being in such low authority I could see him running for it just to get what little power it would give him.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265813

    AND WHERE EVER POSSIBLE, BRING THEM HOLMES

    Kryten reminds the crew of a quirky space corps directive that requires crew to introduce Eamonn Holmes to any new life forms they encounter.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265812

    EVERYBODY LOVES EAMONN

    After yet another encounter with an hallucinagenic squid, the crew believe they inhabit a reality where Eamonn Holmes fronts his very own sitcom.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265804

    BACK TO EAMONN

    An halluciogenic squid makes the crew believe they are TV presenters and Lister has to hand back to the Eamonn Holmes in the studio.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265801

    EAMONN HOLMES. RUTH LANGFORD. THIS MORNING!

    Rimmer demands to know the ITV morning schedule for the school holidays.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265800

    EAMONNDEME

    After contracting a deadly virus from the corpse of a long dead crew member, Lister starts to speak directly to camera with an Irish accent.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265799

    FUTURE EAMONN

    As the crew approach light speed, the see further and further into Eamonn Holmes TV career.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265752

    SAW TIT OUT IN THE MUD

    When his friends ask him how his bird watching trip went, Craig informs them what he managed to see and where.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265750

    SORT IT OUT IN THE PUB

    With pubs re-opening, Craig Charles suggests they head to their nearest boozer to sort it out … whatever “it” is.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265748

    SORT IT OUT WITH SOME DUB

    After Rimmer’s suggestion of Indian restaurant music is shot down as a way of pacifying the Curry Monster, he suggests a style or Jamaican music instead.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265747

    SORT IT OUT IN THE DUB

    Craig Charles protests that he believed all of Timewaves flaws were going to be dealt with in post production.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265740

    THE LAST ROO, MAN!

    When Lister discovers a bouncy Australian mammal in stasis aboard a derelict, he explains to the crew what he’s found.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265730

    LAST HUMMUS

    Doug pens another novel, this time about the last dish of hummus in the entire universe finding itself on an adventure where it meets various other types of hummus.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265715

    R SOLE

    Irene E, Bloody L, O Shit and P Nis’ 2nd cousin twice removed Roberta Sole beams aboard the ship to console her brethren. Rimmer’s excitement is dampened when he realised where he might have to put it.

    in reply to: ADR Leak #265668

    The Bodyswap one sounds higher pitched to me.

    I did wonder that, but then wondered whether the ambient noise was affecting how you hear it. In Bodyswap, he is in the shower and the water is running. They’ve clearly added an effect to make it sound like he is in a cubical with obviously running water. The water especially will be high / top end so that might make it sounds like the delivery of the line is higher pitched.

    Conversely, the DJ line is in the corridor with the low rumble of the engine in the background. So the reverse is true.

    Of course it could all be bollocks and I’m hearing things.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265657

    CRIME AFTER TIMEWAVE

    Shaken to their very core, the British public start rioting in the streets.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265656

    FINE AFTER TIMEWAVE

    OFCOM fine everyone involved with the episode for daring to produce and broadcast such an offensive piece of media.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265648

    TIME AFTER TIME

    Cyndi Lauper pens a song for Gordon Kennedy when she notices that a great deal of the ideas for episodes are based around one single line of the show delivered by a guest character.

    in reply to: Where do they get their crazy ideas from? #265645

    I’ve just found out about a movie from 1981 called Savage Harvest with the tag line “first they prey on human fear, and then they feed on it” which I am now head canoning to be the inspiration for Polymorph, despite the aggressors in this movie seemingly being lions.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265639

    WHAT’S HAPPENING, NUDES?

    Holly is confused when he finds himself on a nudist beach.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265634

    APRIL, MAY, JUNE, JULIUS AND AUGUSTUS, PULLED.

    Holly boasts about his successful night picking up people at the bar.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265593

    1×01

    Metadata for The End that probably appears on some digital files somewhere.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265590

    DO IT TO JULIA MAY

    After intense interrogation, with Mr Rat inches from his face, Winston begs the party to unleash the horror on short lived Red Dwarf director Julia May.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265589

    MR. RAT

    Winston peruses the idea for an episode thread out of sight of Big Brother and finds Mr. Rat in page 101.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265588

    PAGE 101

    All the most truly awful and terrifying episode ideas are posted on page 101 of the idea for an episode thread.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265585

    YOU’VE COVERED THE WEBSITE IN COMPLETE AND UTTER NONSENSE GIBBERISH!

    Anguish starts to set in amongst G&T Admins.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265577

    FUCK MY ARSE PAGE 101 ETC

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265576

    ONLY THE EGG…

    Red Dwarf is attacked by mutant eggs.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265575

    THE EGG

    Lister gets put into stasis for smuggling an egg on board. “Don’t you remember what happened on the omelette with the rabbits?”

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265574

    HOLlOWEGG

    Lister starts to prepare breakfast only to find his eggs empty but unbroken shells.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265573

    TERROREGG

    Rimmer crash lands on a planet that attacks him with his until now unmentioned fear of eggs.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265572

    BEYOND A YOLK

    Kryten gets annoyed when Lister keeps changing his mind about how he wants the yolk on his fried eggs, that his head explodes.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265571

    POACH ME AN EGG

    Ace Rimmer changes his breakfast order as he is getting tired of kippers.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265570

    EGGTANGLED

    Cat and Kryten can’t stop talking about eggs at the same time, and Lister lost Starbug in a computer game with some evolved humanoid eggs.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265569

    EGGTICA

    The crew chase a group of vegan Simulants back to the 20th century who are intent on banning eggs.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265568

    EGG AND TAKE

    Lister goes on an halloween trip to the future where he eggs his own quarters and steals his own chocolate.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265567

    THE LAST EGG

    Kryten reveals they only have one egg left, but that new eggs have been sent to replace it. Lister, having become sentimentally attached to the egg because he … likes to … hide it in … special places … decides to defend it with all his power and beats the new arrivals with a whisk.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265566

    DOCTOR EGGMAN OF THE APOCALYPSE

    The crew transform into small woodland creatures to defeat a fat, moustachioed computer virus.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265551

    EGGER

    Rimmer goes jumping through different universes egging all the people there that he doesn’t like.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265547

    BACK IN THE EGG

    Lister stays on Backwards world and finds himself swimming around inside Kochanski’s uterus.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265546

    EGG HOLE

    The crew discover a giant chicken in space laying eggs all over the universe. This results in Lister having a PTSD episode from his time as a chicken and it gets quite bleak from there.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265545

    EGGQUISITOR

    The Easter Bunny travels through time interrogating people over whether they feel they hunted enough Easter eggs, and removing from history those who had miserable childhoods.

    in reply to: Unanswered Questions #265543

    Is the Rimmer song from Blue (the episode, not the boy band) based on an established/traditional melody? The verses bit. My wife’s been singing the tune without proper words, but she doesn’t know what it is, nor what Red Dwarf is, really (still thinks Cat’s a vampire).

    It’s kinda circus music isn’t it, with a bit of a military feel to it too. Which is likely deliberate.

    So I don’t think it is anything in particular but it’s drawing on a lot of generic but broadly known influences.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265537

    APRIL MAY JUNE JULY AND AUGUST FOOLWAVE

    Three and a half years after it’s release, Doug reveals Timewave to be one giant practical joke he was playing on the audience and in fact, if you play it backwards, it shows a heartwarming story about how criticism can be good but feel free to be who you want to be regardless of what anyone tells you.

    This results in Lister and Cat supporting Rimmer’s daft endeavour to name a moon after himself, because they’re his friends and that’s what friends do.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265535

    FOOLWAVE

    The crew are struck by a spatial anomaly that is washing up practical jokes and flooding their region of space with slightly quirky heavily eye rolly newspaper articles.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265526

    TED LASSO MAN: APOCALYPSE PART 3

    In the third part of this Apocalypse trilogy, the crew find themselves being coached as a 5 aside football team by Ted Lasso and in a bid to create a program to defeat the Apocalypse Boys.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265518

    WAITING FOR PLOD

    Lister makes his way into the bowels of the ship to discover a Priest he assumes has been waiting his whole life to meet him, only to find out this cat’s god is a Pink Police Officer he’s heard about because it’s he is convinced the whole world is “PC Gone Mad TM”

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265490

    PURTURBED

    Lister is again tempted by Pete Tranter’s sister’s offer, until he remembers she is a Psiren

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265488

    RE-FURRED

    As Cat starts to go bald, he gets a referral from a space vet to have a hair transplant.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265483

    SNAPPY

    The crew discover a robot they believe to be an incredibly smart medical surgeon, but it in fact turns out to just be Paul Jackson snapping pencils.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265482

    9000 POSTS LATER

    Several years after the events of The Promised Land, Red Dwarf returns for a one off special, and Doug gives a nod to all the ideas in the idea for an episode thread at the start of the show, implying that all of these events may have actually happened in the intervening years.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265480

    I’VE NEVER READ … THE IDEA FOR AN EPISODE THREAD

    Lister gets quite upset at the thought he might die young, having never had the chance to read this thread.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265476

    FFS, I was going to lock the thread for lols when it was one post shy of the hundredth page, but you were too quick. We’ll have to do it for the thousandth instead.

    CHALLENGE AND PARANOIA

    Forum members take G&T admins up on their challenge to get the thread to 1000 pages, but get quite paranoid it might not be possible,

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265469

    AAAAAANNNND ONE HUNDRED

    Tensions run high as forum members post in the 100th page, despite being warned that doing so would make the them and them explode.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265436

    BUMWAVE

    New title for Pete Part 2 to appear on the menu for the 64k straight-to-brain-beam transmission 90th anniversary release.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265428

    V-CORP

    The crew download a Japanese censorship program that pixilates all the vaginas in the ships porn library.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265400

    ARE YOU SAYING I’VE GOT A BIG DRUM

    Lister joins the ships orchestra and discovers he has been assigned as Timpani player.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265398

    ARE YOU SAYING I’VE GOT BIG CUM?

    Lister asks Kryten for the results of his fertility test

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265342

    BONEY TV

    Jealous of Kryten’s exploits in the women’s showers, Boney starts a live stream from the men’s.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265341

    BONEY A JOKE

    Boney becomes enraged when he finds out the crew have been making him the butt of every joke and his head explodes, forcing the crew to go grave robbing.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265340

    TIKKA TO BONEY

    The crew have gone out for a curry and Lister informs the waiter it was Boney that ordered the Tikka.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265308

    BUILDING A BETTER IDEA FOR AN EPISODE THREAD

    Short tribute to all those contributors we have lost along the way.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265305

    IDEA FOR AN EPISODE CONNECTIONS

    30min BBC documentary about how all the contributors to the thread know each other.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265300

    IDEA FOR AN EPISODE BUGGERS

    Documentary to feature on the sixth DVD release of ideas for episodes, that explores Ian Symes frustration with the many contributors to the thread.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265298

    THE PROMISED IDEA FOR AN EPISODE

    Documentary exploring the Idea for an Episode thread and a group of fans unfounded belief that if they continue on they’ll find their perfect episode idea.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265297

    LAST IDEA FOR AN EPISODE

    The final post in the Idea for an Episode thread is inexplicably accompanied by other ideas for episodes.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265273

    IDEA FOR AN EPISODE THREAD REMASTERED

    All ideas for an episode have Skutters applied to them.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265252

    CHEAP, STUPID, AND WOULDN’T LOAD

    A user starts to experience problems with a certain thread on the forums.

    in reply to: Your Unpopular Red Dwarf Opinions #265248

    Baseball Cards

    I really dislike the baseball card gag as it changes the joke entirely. Rather than an ironic gag about a rather poor and low level man more concerned with an overdue library book, than therefore the fine he will have accrued in 3million years … it becomes a joke about a man more concerned with suddenly being rich after 3million years. And other than Timeslides (which is more about his situation than anything else), Lister isn’t a man that really comes across as being concerned about money.

    It flips the joke and what it tells us about the character for the worse in my view.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265240

    KNEEING TIME

    Gordon Kennedy gets ready to play Rimmer’s stunt double in the final moments of series VIII

    in reply to: Your Unpopular Red Dwarf Opinions #265236

    Not sure just how unpopular this is, but one of my all-time top ten Red Dwarf jokes actually comes from Red Dwarf USA. Kryten’s ‘fire exit’ gag. That must be a Rob & Doug line, surely?

    pretty sure it was in the novel

    It sort of is. Kryten reads part of a letter of a book a day, so some weeks are really dull when it’s quite obvious what the letter and resulting word will be.

    But it is ultimate the same sort of gag, with the same intention and energy etc.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265203

    BLUE MIDGET IS LOADED

    Kryten announced that a ship to surface vessel has inexplicably come into a rather hefty inheritance.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265174

    WELL IT PROBABLY IS VA VA VOOM, IT SOUNDS LIKE IT

    Thierry Henry beams about Red Dwarf and discusses early 21st century Renaults with Rimmer

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265172

    WELL IT PROBABLY IS A DIDGERIDOO, IT SOUNDS LIKE IT

    With Kryten cataloguing all the musical instruments salvaged from a derelict ship, Rimmer is helping him identify them.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265171

    WELL IT PROBABLY IS A LARGE POO, IT SOUNDS LIKE IT.

    Lister ponders what’s taking the Cat so long in the little boys room.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265169

    MRS BROWNS BOYS FROM THE DWARF

    Red Dwarf is re-cast with an all Irish drag-act cast.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265166

    MORE ALE OFFICE

    Lister appoints himself the person to ensure there is always plenty of ale.

    in reply to: Unanswered Questions #265165

    What would Jeff Martin do with a life-time supply of chocolate?

    Shove it up his bum.

    in reply to: Your Unpopular Red Dwarf Opinions #265157

    I actually think the series VIII version is close to the series I/II look but the Skipper version is closer in reality to what they imagined. Dark, metallic, submarine style bunk.

    The others are too polished and shiny.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265145

    HOLE: 12 MONTHS

    Hollister sentences Lister and Rimmer to listen to Courtney Love’s band for 12 months straight.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265143

    WHAT ABOUT THE APE-EEL

    Doug draws some inspiration from Last Human buy introducing GELFs that are a combination of two different animals. Rimmer gets quite concerned about a certain GELF during a high jinx prank on a senior officer.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265142

    YOU’VE BEEN KRYTERED

    A rather cheeky, sexually miss-deviant mechanoid coins a catch phrase to shout every time he inappropriately touches a member of the crew.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265135

    THIS IS AN SMS DISTRESS CALL FROM THE MINING SHIP RED DWARF

    Holly texts everyone in his address book.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265133

    THIS IS A P.O.O. DISTRESS CALL FROM THE MINING SHIP RED DWARF

    It’s brown trousers time so Holly sends out a message.

    in reply to: Your Unpopular Red Dwarf Opinions #265130

    I’ll tell you my actual unpopular Red Dwarf opinion. I really like all of Emohawk. I think it’s probably one of the top three from the series. The “second half” everyone complains about is really only the last 5mins. And logic aside, it’s fun having Ace and Duane on screen together, which couldn’t have happened any other time.

    Everything that comes before, all the cockpit stuff, the crashing, the GELFs, the marriage etc is all absolutely fantastic stuff. The last 5-10mins is no more of strange, unrelated tact on ending to an episode than DNA or something like that. And it’s fun. Full of laughs.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265128

    THIS IS A BSKYB DISTRESS CALL FROM THE MINING SHIP RED DWARF

    Holly sends out a distress call, but only to people that subscribe to TV packages from the BSkyB Group

    in reply to: Your Unpopular Red Dwarf Opinions #265116

    Skipper is another of those ones that feels like two distinct episode ideas pushed into one.

    Rimmer skipping through dimensions is easily 20mins of episode book ended by 5mins to open and close it.

    And the whole “do the opposite of what you say” could easily be fleshed out into a full episode of its own, with its own consequences and resolution.

    It sort of feels as if Doug couldn’t work that first half into a full episode so you’d it as a spring board into the skipping idea he had, but ended up spending a lot more time on that first concept eating into the seconds.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265098

    KYPTO-FASCIST-FACTOR

    A young Lister hosts a TV game show where fascist dictators are set tasks and games to test their mental and physical abilities.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265097

    UTTER CRAP

    New title for series VIII to appear on the 16k super high res laser vinyl to be released 4 years after the shows 75th anniversary.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265068

    A SIMPLE MINDS WOULD HAVE SUFFICED

    Glaswegian new-wave-synth-pop-rockers cameo to warn Rimmer against using a mind patch.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265067

    A SIMPLE PLAN WOULD HAVE SUFFICED

    Canadian pop-punkers cameo to suggest using the teleporter.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265021

    GRASSED HUMAN

    Doug writes a novel about the journalist that outed Craig Charles as a crack addict.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265011

    I DIDN’T COME HERE LOOKING FOR DOUBLE

    New title for Me2 to appear on the 4k blu-ray boxset.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265005

    I DIDN’T COME HERE LOOKING FOR LOVELL

    When the crew wind up in Florida in 1970, Lister has to explain to everyone via the medium of song that they’re not looking for Apollo 13 Commander Jim Lovell.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265001

    I DIDN’T COME HERE LOOKING FOR PEBBLES

    When the crew find themselves on a rather stoney beach rather than a sandy desert island paradise they were promised, Lister breaks into song.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #265000

    I DIDN’T COME HERE LOOKING FOR TRIBBLES

    Lister regrets smuggling aboard an un-quarantined animal

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #264967

    I JUST CAME TO DO THE RED DWARF SKIFFLE

    Lister and Cat form a folk band.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #264965

    I DODNT COME HERE LOOKING FOR BUNGLE: BACK TO EARTH 2

    Lister and Cat travel through a time hole and end up on the set of 70s children’s show Rainbow.

    in reply to: Idea for an episode. #264932

    DWAYNE DIMBLEBY

    Cat turns into a future descendant of the Dimbleby family who is unfortunately a bit of a blithering idiot.

Viewing 100 posts - 1 through 100 (of 2,595 total)