Profile Topics Started Replies Created Engagements Forum Replies Created Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 305 total) 1 2 3 … 5 6 7 Author Posts August 26, 2020 at 12:55 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261130 RubberParticipant I’D EEYORE FOR AN EPISODE Unusual episode with a fairly downbeat, existentialist plot which would probably make me quite depressed for the duration but would nudge the show out of ‘heritage sitcom’ status and back into some sort of temporary relevance again, I suppose. August 26, 2020 at 12:54 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261129 RubberParticipant EYE DEE or FOR A NAPE, I SEWED Absolutely exhausting boundary-pushing Coupling-style split-screen episode in which two A-plots run side-by-side with overlapping dialogue and no pacing concessions made to those poor non-mechanoid viewers who can’t process two separate stories happening simultaneously. While Rimmer and Lister spend an uncomfortable half hour covertly watching Kochanski’s bubbly, much less discerning cousin Dee via the CCTV spycam they placed in her private shower, Cat becomes absolutely obsessed with the fit of all his suits where the collar sits on the back of his neck, and demands that Kryten restitch every single one or face death by disintegration. A humorous silent background plot involving Holly developing computer acne ties the two storylines together. Guest starring Sally Lindsay as Dee. August 23, 2020 at 7:36 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261106 RubberParticipant HIDE EAR FOR AN EPISODE It’s April Fool’s Day! Two cheeky Skutters remove Kryten’s left ear while he’s distracted and conceal it behind the Piney Shine in the cleaning supplies cupboard, leading to 30 minutes of Kryten desperately roaming the ship trying to find it. Meanwhile, Lister has a wank. In a rare post-credits scene, Kryten eventually locates the ear and furiously smashes the sniggering Skutters to pieces with a sledgehammer. August 22, 2020 at 10:45 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261097 RubberParticipant IDEA: FOUR ARN EPISODE Inspiration strikes Doug once again: an entire episode about the Rimmer barbershop quartet! August 22, 2020 at 9:41 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261094 RubberParticipant I DEAR FOR AN EPISODE Rimmer finally succumbs to the constant pressure of his peers and becomes an extremely expensive holo-prostitute for half an hour. August 22, 2020 at 8:31 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261093 RubberParticipant ID-R4N EPISODE Butler’s uncouth Australian cousin, Brucebot ID-R4N, unexpectedly comes to stay the night before Butz is due to be interviewed by Melvyn Bragg at the opening of his new play. Can our favourite metal polymath keep the embarrassingly off-brand beer-swilling, arse-slapping, dingo-munching swearbox away from the luvvies, the critics and the cameras, and maintain his reputation for refinement? August 21, 2020 at 10:34 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261086 RubberParticipant ID ARTHUR: AN EPISODE Keen to bring the median viewer age for Dave-era Dwarf below 57, Doug writes a crossover script in which Kryten asks cheerful Canadian kids’ TV cartoon aardvark Arthur for some identification when he tries to purchase hard liquor at Parrots. August 21, 2020 at 10:29 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261083 RubberParticipant IDEA: FOREIGN EPISODE Doug writes an Tokyo-based episode performed entirely in Japanese and CHRIST Kryten’s lines are a bugger to learn for this one. August 21, 2020 at 10:26 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261082 RubberParticipant I DEER FOR AN EPISODE Cat digs out his unreality bubble reindeer head from VI and wears it for the full half hour. August 21, 2020 at 9:33 pm in reply to: The Best Bits of VIII #261081 RubberParticipant TBF I love that Geraldine McEwan was in Red Dwarf and I love that her episode stood head and shoulders above the others. The prison sets are good (although most of the rest of the ship sets aren’t really). Kochanski’s “no wonder I couldn’t lure him out with a bit of cheese” is probably her best line in the whole of VIII and she doesn’t ham it up. In fact she does a very good job with the most thankless, underwritten role throughout the series. Rimmer not realising Lister’s appeal is about guitar strings in funny, although nothing about the way it plays out or pays off is. If VII hadn’t set him off down this path already it would have been infuriating BUT Kryten had already spent a series becoming so erratic that by the start of VIII that it was quite amusing to see the new/old crew regarding him as dangerously deranged. August 21, 2020 at 2:21 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261056 RubberParticipant MIGHTY LIGHT III: PET RESCUE Rimmer turns into the Mighty Light to rescue a mewling kitten from inside a ventilation shaft, intending to softlight the wall of the duct, reach through and tug the pawsy micropuss to safety. Unfortunately he activates his powers slightly too enthusiastically and inadvertently causes everything connected to the duct to turn soft light as well, which is basically the internal infrastructure and the outer hull of the entire ship, quickly asphyxiating the organic component of the crew. The Mighty Light! The Mighty Light! August 21, 2020 at 2:08 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261055 RubberParticipant MIGHTY LIGHT II: MIDWIFE Rimmer turns into the Mighty Light just as Kochanski goes into labour, so he reaches inside her fleshy babcradle, lasers through the umbilical cord, turns the child soft light and pulls it out through the surface of her belly. Unfortunately his powers fail halfway through the delivery and everything solidifies again, leaving Kochanski with a pair of babylegs protruding from her swollen abdomen for the rest of her life. The Mighty Light! The Mighty Light! August 21, 2020 at 1:53 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261054 RubberParticipant MIGHTY LIGHT! Rimmer turns into the Mighty Light, gives Lister a big hug and turns him soft light, trapping him in the same incorporeal hell Rimmer suffered through for five years before Legion fisted him solid. Don’t you mess with the Mighty Light! The Mighty Light! The Mighty Light! God I just adore the Mighty Light. August 21, 2020 at 12:38 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261052 RubberParticipant SILVER HOLO-WARE It’s the sixteenth page, but how best to technically inaccurately mark the occasion? WELL. After checking the Wikipedia entry for wedding anniversary gifts, Rimmer nips down to space John Lewis and returns with an array of silver sugar bowls, creamers, coffee pots, teapots, soup tureens, hot food covers, water jugs, platters and butter pat plates, before firing up his diamond light drive and turning them all soft light so nobody else can use them. August 21, 2020 at 9:45 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261049 RubberParticipant LISE’S PIZZAS Brainpasted photocopy Lise Yates’ pizza restaurant goes down the [deep!] pan when her controlling boyfriend David insists she pour curry sauce over everything before serving it. Meanwhile, Rimmer gets really into A/R Risk and it’s all fun and games until several war-hungry platoons escape from the A/R machine just as the crew discover that one of their number has idiotically switched all the live bazookoid ammo for blanks. Duck, smegheads! August 20, 2020 at 10:35 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261040 RubberParticipant TELFORD’S GEL HOARDS It’s the early days of the COVID-19 pandemic and fauxchassised psychoprick Professor Telford scurries around the research base gathering up all the little bottles of antibacterial handwash and hiding them in various covert crannies for his personal use only. Meanwhile, Kryten’s amusing plan to pretend to shake hands with Kochanski, only to break one of her fingers at the last second, takes a tricky turn when he accidentally rips her entire arm off, panics and crushes both her legs and then punches her in the boob. How’s our favourite mech going to talk his way out of that one? August 20, 2020 at 10:09 pm in reply to: Red Dwarf VIII is flawed #261036 RubberParticipant FUCK KNOWS FUCK KNOWS FUCK KNOWS although one thing I do know is that pouring a virus onto a boilersuit won’t immediately give the virus to the person in the boilersuit and absolutely nobody else nearby. August 20, 2020 at 10:07 pm in reply to: Red Dwarf VIII is flawed #261035 RubberParticipant The assaults on Rimmer still confuse me. He took the sexual magnetism virus to become irresistible to women, then when they can’t resist he tries to refuse? I’m not victim-blaming at all, but at the same time the women were not in control of themselves – we saw how it affected Kochanski, and how she felt disgusted and mortified once it wore off; her actions were not willing – so the women with Rimmer would feel similarly, and equally their actions were not willing either. (Btw if the genders were reversed I would still be confused; it just would may have been more immediately recognised as problematic.) I can only conclude that Rimmer trying to refuse was another thing for the sake of ‘oh this’ll be funny’ without thinking through the implications. The implications of the virus making someone actually irresistible – not just attractive – are problematic in themselves, too. I cannot see a way around the situation (e.g. Rimmer consenting) that would make it okay. Depressingly, I spent all afternoon wondering about the ethics and legality around this. I’m sure IRL someone can be around a person with sexual magnetism without being unable to stop themselves assaulting them, but using it deliberately to attract only certain people is also misguided and arguably the same as intoxicating someone to make them more suggestible (certainly his intention) so HMMMM faults on all sides potentially. Although Lister covertly dousing him in it is definitely WRONG and all those men who grab him are WRONG although maybe more susceptible or suggestible FUCK KNOWS FUCK KNOWS FUCK KNOWS August 20, 2020 at 9:23 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261026 RubberParticipant SNACKY’S JACKIES Broad-shouldered beefcake dispensary Snacky stumbles across a stash of 1970s and 80s Jackie magazines in a stasis booth and promptly vanishes for several years while he ploughs through all the frothy back issues, mostly for the problem pages if he’s being honest. Meanwhile, everyone’s really into paper scissors stone, but poor old Holly feels like a corpse on a bouncy castle: not really able to participate fully! Chin up, armless! August 20, 2020 at 8:53 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261024 RubberParticipant DEATH’S JEFFS Multibrow drooptache baldibonce simultant Death spends a stressful evening trying to juggle three separate simultaneous dates with his obliviously chuckholded young boyfriends Jeff, Jeff and Jeff, all without losing track of his cover stories or losing track of his temper and blasting them to atoms. Meanwhile, Cat decides it’s time to incorporate more fibre into his diet. Pass the Bran Flakes, smegheads! Guest starring Himesh Patel as Jeff, Liam Williams as Jeff, Tom Rosenthal as Jeff and John Bercow as Winking Maitre D’. August 20, 2020 at 8:31 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261021 RubberParticipant ZIGGY’S PIGGIES Fluffbonced frockcoat Ziggy starts breeding his collection of pigs with jugs to make pugs, but instead he just ends up with lots of jugs of pig semen – though, on the SS Encomium, that’s good enough for the sperm bank! Meanwhile, Lister spends the entire episode being portrayed by crack aficionado and Ghostwatch alumnus Craig Charles. August 20, 2020 at 7:59 pm in reply to: Red Dwarf VIII is flawed #261014 RubberParticipant I’m trying to decide what my actual worst single moment of S8 is, but having trouble choosing. Probably either of the rapes for me. Or that bit where Birdman says ‘and this is Pete!’ with a big grin that I think is supposed to be endearing. August 20, 2020 at 7:20 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #261009 RubberParticipant FRANK’S WANKS Dwarflore mainstay Frank masturbates. AAAAHHHH, BUT WHICH ONE? Meanwhile, Lister gets Kochanski conspicuously sozzled and Kryten forcibly nudges her down the spiral staircase when no-one’s watching. August 20, 2020 at 3:41 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260997 RubberParticipant CHEN’S PENS Bubblepermed greasesplatter Chen honours the unrealised ambition of his long-deceased great-great-grandmother Pauline Campbell-Jones and opens a small stationery concession on Red Dwarf, much to Rimmer’s obvious delight. Meanwhile, Kryten and Cat turn competitive when they both get really into making fractionally different varieties of spacemustard. Guest starring Pam St Clement as Big Mama Chen. August 20, 2020 at 3:13 pm in reply to: the social significance of nerds like Duane Dibbley? #260996 RubberParticipant I never got why it’s bad for him to have a thermos. Hot drinks are nerdy? Just go to Starbucks like everybody else Pricey! A thermos is a good investment. You can probably get one with a picture of Kochanski on it these days. August 20, 2020 at 10:16 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260983 RubberParticipant LISTER’S ‘LISTERS Smegasaurus stinkoik Dave Lister makes 349 photocopies of Captain Hollister’s face, draws a different moustache on each one and uses them to wallpaper his bunkroom. Meanwhile, Cat’s cuban heels have worn all the skin off his heel and he realises Rimmer was right about the benefits of shoe trees all along. Will he swallow his pride and ask for a lend? August 20, 2020 at 10:10 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260982 RubberParticipant HOLLISTER’S DOLL LISTERS Flabbergut bossbollock Captain Hollister develops a crush on Lister and takes a mould of him while he’s in stasis which he uses to create two dozen Lister pleasuredolls, all doomed to end up flattened under the fat captain’s bulky desire in a frottage frenzy. Meanwhile, Rimmer’s absolutely fuming that nobody’s said anything nice about his yellow eyeshadow. August 20, 2020 at 9:02 am in reply to: the social significance of nerds like Duane Dibbley? #260981 RubberParticipant Comedy writers who feel like they’re sitting some way down the social pecking order – and are either annoyed at it or relishing in it – doing the usual ‘well at least this person is clearly much more of a loser than me’ thing. August 20, 2020 at 8:44 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260980 RubberParticipant PREE’S KNEES Gothbrowed predictabitch screentwat Pree reinstalls herself and makes a point of selecting a frame size that shows her legs as well as her face and knockers. Meanwhile, Cat whiles away another dull evening firing Kryten’s spare eyes from his vagina. August 20, 2020 at 8:27 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260979 RubberParticipant CAMILLE’S DAMN WHEELS Self-doubting splattergreen squelchmonster Camille slips a disc during a particularly vigorous bout of lovemaking and ends up confined to a wheelchair for several months, much to xyr frustration. Meanwhile, Kryten isn’t even bothering to hide the fact that he puts broken glass and razor blades in Kochanski’s meals anymore. August 19, 2020 at 9:58 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260959 RubberParticipant CAT’S BRATS Dave repeats Can of Worms. Meanwhile, Kryten blacks up. August 19, 2020 at 9:42 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260956 RubberParticipant LISTER’S SOLIC’TORS Species finale Dave Lister stumbles across a small firm of litigators quietly beavering away at the back end of Y deck, apparently blissfully unaware that the original crew are dead and three million years have passed. Freshly alerted to the current situation, they coerce Lister into filing hundreds of aggressive lawsuits against a horrified and increasingly pennycentless Rimmer in order to maintain a steady stream of income for the firm. Ker-CHING! Meanwhile, Triad Tony digs out his trusty machete and honour kills Madge. Guest starring Stephen Mangan as Anthony Bretherton and Nish Kumar as Sanjay Proctor-Singh. August 19, 2020 at 5:04 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260948 RubberParticipant CAT’S BATS Fangfuck clotheshorse Cat finally gets around to sniffskimming his crippled mother’s memoir and learns that his pointy incisors didn’t grow that way because he’s a moggy — he was actually sired by a vampire! Suddenly all the elaborate tailoring and pompadour hairstyling makes sense. He immediately defrosts all the bats from the cryogenic storedeck and recruits then as his bloodly minions, only to find they’re indifferent to his commands — turns out he was reading the wrong memoir and the ‘Moggy’ with the vampire pops was actually of the Jacob Rhys- variety. Satirical! Meanwhile, Rimmmer’s planning to represent Io in elbow-titting at the 3003000 Olympics, but due to COVID-19 still being a thing he’s having to compete remotely via webcam using a standard issue bioprinted breastmould, and he’s not happy about it! Will Kochanski soften towards him and let him nudge her pillows for his moment of glory? August 19, 2020 at 4:28 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260947 RubberParticipant HOLLISTER’S JOLLY STAIRS Keen to shift some of that Tesco blueberry muffin blubber, lardarse overlord Captain Hollister encourages staircase use by giving the entire stairwell an SS Enconium makeover and installing holograms of Ziggy shrieking motivational slogans on every landing. Love that accent, funboy! Meanwhile, Cat’s alarmed but not entirely surprised to note that, 18 pages into the table reading, he’s still only had two lines of dialogue. Guest starring Joaquin Phoenix as Holozig. August 19, 2020 at 3:50 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260940 RubberParticipant HOLLY’S DOLLIES Retarded sundial Holly’s feeling waggish, so he flushes the crew out into deep space and replaces them with Sylvanian Families. Meanwhile, an unusually calm Todhunter picks up a fresh scalpel and carves ‘I WILL NOT’ into his forearm, then blankly stares at it for 74 minutes before finding something to mop up the blood. August 19, 2020 at 3:36 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260938 RubberParticipant RIMMER’S ZIMMERS Suddenly irrationally fixated on his advancing years — despite being a total deado — cuntish desklamp Rimmer starts obsessively stockpiling Zimmer frames from every derelict they encounter, despite his faux-jovial insistence that he’ll never need them. Meanwhile, Kryten traps Kochanski in the reflection of every mirror on board ship, then smashes them all. August 19, 2020 at 12:33 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260931 RubberParticipant KRYTEN’S BRIGHT HENS Following another humiliating poetry recital chez Butler, exposition dilettante Kryten decides to raise the conversational standards on board Red Dwarf by infecting the rest of the crew with a brain-bulging programmable intelligence virus. Unfortunately they’re all completely immune to the effects, but when Cat accidentally infects the stasis chicken coop, Kryten finds himself up to his eyes in professorial poultry! Meanwhile, Lister dodges the shower for the 7848th day in a row, so Rimmer snaps and hangs him. August 19, 2020 at 10:58 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260927 RubberParticipant LISTER’S FISTERS After yet another night on the sauce, filth reservoir Dave Lister falls foul of Lady Law when he’s caught drunk in charge of Starbug and sentenced to 500 hours of community service. To his obvious discomfort, dirty Dave finds himself tasked with coaching an enthusiastic but unskilled team of amateur fisters facing another potential trouncing in the BDSM arena at the Zero-Gee Olympics. Will Lister overcome his innate prejudices and steer the punchfucking boys to glory, opening his own metaphorical rosebud and learning something important from them along the way? Meanwhile, Rimmer discovers that his sparkly holo-farts make excellent indoor fireworks. Ooooh! Aaaah! Guest starring Andrew Scott as Dominic Harness, with Hugh Skinner and Russell Tovey as Nathan and Bumper. August 19, 2020 at 9:16 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260921 RubberParticipant CAT’S STATS Pedantry looms large when fashion-forward fish aficionado Cat starts wearing glasses and immediately develops an intense interest in statistics, much to the chagrin of constantly-corrected Rimmer! Meanwhile, Kochanski attempts to pass the Bechdel test after 23 consecutive fails. Could it finally be her year? August 19, 2020 at 7:29 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260920 RubberParticipant HOLLY’S CAULIS Neckless brainchamber Holly embraces semi-retirement and gets an allotment, but soon finds the cutthroat world of competitive vegetable growing is far more stressful than running Red Dwarf ever was! Meanwhile, Kryten and Rimmer argue over whether tampons, pads or mooncups are better, despite neither having a stake in the outcome nor being remotely qualified to answer the question. Guest starring Kevin Whately as Voice Of Wheelbarrow. August 19, 2020 at 12:04 am in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260913 RubberParticipant KOCHANSKI’S SCOTCH PANKIES Snooty tit-haver Kris develops a hankering for the pancakes she enjoyed back in Glasgow as a young girl, but can she identify her mother’s vital secret ingredient and rediscover the taste of her childhood? (It turns out to be maternal love, btw.) Meanwhile, Cat bleaches his anus and Lister breaches his anus. August 18, 2020 at 10:59 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260909 RubberParticipant RIMMER’S DIMMERS Pernickety projection Rimmer’s bullying best friend Dave Lister forcibly retrofits his light bee with a dimmer switch and turns him down just a bit… just a bit more… little bit more… little bit more… just a bit more… more than that… little bit more than that… just a bit more… until Rimmer’s essentially invisible and inaudible, trapped in a Kafkaesque nightmare, and Lister can completely ignore him. Meanwhile, Kryten decides to start keeping one item of jewellery from every prostitute he bludgeons to death. Guest starring Alison Brie as Tawny-Rose. August 18, 2020 at 10:06 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260906 RubberParticipant HOLLY’S MOLLIES Human futurepolitics inevitably cycles through another depressing right-wing period and, in response, the JMC onboard computer outlaws all homosexual activity and non-binary pursuits. As the only genuinely intelligent entity on-board ship, demented screensaver Holly responds by setting up a covert meeting place for Red Dwarf’s closeted gay residents, but who’ll be first through the door? Meanwhile, Cat falls foul of the new restrictions when a Skutter mistakes him for a drag artiste and tasers him. August 18, 2020 at 9:55 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260905 RubberParticipant LISTER’S BLISTERS Walking skidmark Dave Lister’s bra-unhooking practice has taken its toll on his friction-addled fingers – where can he find a firm, high-backed armchair in which to recuperate? Meanwhile, Rimmer’s genealogy exploits lead him to the alarming realisation that ‘Dungo’ Dennis, his parents’ gardener and Rimmer’s biological father, later moved to Callisto to train in patisserie and went on to operate a small doughnut franchise on a mining ship in orbit around Jupiter, before all trace of him mysteriously disappeared… August 18, 2020 at 9:27 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260901 RubberParticipant CAT’S LATS It’s Elevatoramadan, so all the lifts on board Red Dwarf go on a vertical travel fast for a month between synthetic sunrise and synthetic sunset. Without the lifts, the crew are forced to rely on flexible feline Cat shimmying up the inside of the elevator shaft to fetch them things from the upper levels. A month later, Cat’s lateral muscles are in great shape and everyone suddenly remembers they have staircases. Meanwhile, Lister’s allergic to Kryten’s new nipple – how will they maintain the milk supply? August 18, 2020 at 9:13 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260897 RubberParticipant KRYTEN’S BLYTONS Disinfection droid Kryten discovers a passion for the works of Enid Blyton and decides to start running Red Dwarf like a 1940s boarding school for wealthy white girls. Rimmer enjoys the brisk discipline and Cat enjoys the pleated skirts, but will dyed-in-the-wool underclassling Dave Lister ever flourish in this privileged environment? Meanwhile, Todhunter’s regression therapy hints at some unfinished business with his father’s valet, but why can’t he unlock the memory? Guest starring Daniel Mays as Lambert. August 18, 2020 at 8:40 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260896 RubberParticipant RIMMER’S SLIMMERS After completing an A/R Space Corps Acting Senior Officer weekend refresher course, blue-blazered bastard Rimmer returns with a renewed sense of drill sergeant purpose and becomes obsessed with the idea that everyone else on board ship weighs too much, sealing the crew in quarantine and forcing them to undergo extreme diet and exercise programmes until they weigh the same as his ‘ideal weight’ – his light bee! Six months later, Cat and Lister are down to under five stone but are suffering extreme organ failure while mineral man Kryten has been forced to amputate and incinerate every part of his body save a single eyeball. Meanwhile, Holly starts breeding feral Skutters for cockfights. Guest starring Jimmy Carr as A/R Interface With A Smug Voice. August 18, 2020 at 5:54 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260887 RubberParticipant CAT’S FLATS Upholstered simpleton Cat is devastated when space moths run riot on the Dwarf, gobbling every last stitch of clothing from his extensive collection. What’s a mog to do with twenty-seven decks of empty clothes rails and no cash to refill them? Why, let the wardrobes out as studio flats, of course! How will the fancy feline take to his new role as a slum landlord? Meanwhile, Kryten and Rimmer find common ground over both being desperately unhappy. August 18, 2020 at 5:36 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260885 RubberParticipant RIMMER’S HYMMERS The Dwarfers stumble across an underdog tribe of straggly devout cat clerics, and Spectral nincompoop Rimmer discovers an as-yet-unexploited talent for coaching this enthusiastic but unpolished mob in the art of choral singing. Will the pussy posse still accept his tuition when they realise all his audio output is basically coming from a tiny speaker in his light bee? Meanwhile, Butler’s back from Broadmoor and he’s got a new friend. Guest starring David Suchet as Nicola Crayola. August 18, 2020 at 5:21 pm in reply to: Idea for an episode. #260884 RubberParticipant KRYTEN’S FRIGHTENS Bipedal scrubber Kryten gets really into telling spooky midnight ghost stories but worries that there isn’t an effectively spooky atmosphere on board ship to really do his tales justice, so he removes his head and chases a terrified Kochanski around the unlit storage bay with his groinal chainsaw attachment for twenty-nine nerve-shredding, sanity-obliterating hours. Meanwhile, Rimmer and Holly both need a holiday — but they’re skint! So as a compromise they agree to swap their pixelated anuses for a week. Author Posts Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 305 total) 1 2 3 … 5 6 7