Seb Patrick

[Seb Patrick]

http://web.archive.org/web/20041106143731/www.geocities.com/janvogels/reviews.html

[Seb Patrick]

But posting below someone doesn’t guarantee that you would – you’re supposed to answer.

I wouldn’t want Phil’s sloppy seconds, so… no.

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Just get me a plane ticket.

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Yeah, well, you only have to look at the aforementioned “Broadcasting House” article to see how utterly ill-informed and downright shit the standard of writing on that site is. Because, from the looks of it, there’s no editorial work at all – anyone can just submit stuff, and so it’s filled with utter bollocks.

God, what a complete waste of internet.

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>right up there with ?What?s an iguana??

Alright, people need to stop proliferating this crazy view of John’s.

I’m only going to say this once : “What’s an iguana?” is a quite funny line, well-delivered by Craig. So stop ragging on it, y’hear?

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While they still snipe at each other in later series, and it’s never really a given that Lister *likes* Rimmer, I think you can take Me2 as a definite watershed in terms of their relationship…

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You know that the three HL2 sequels are officially now existing in lieu of HL3, though? They are, taken together, for all intents and purposes the full sequel. And it’s hard to judge them as insubstantial when only one of the three has actually been released so far…

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I would presume, though, that rank – something which Rimmer takes incredibly seriously, as Balance of Power demonstrates – goes out of the window when you’re in prison. When they’re in the Tank, Rimmer is not Lister’s superior – he’s his equal. Therefore, he can’t boss him around quite as he’d otherwise want to. I think his desire to obey the hierarchy probably (painfully) outweighs his desire to be cruel to Lister…

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Hah, we were wondering at the weekend if you’d discover that at some point. Ian’s just got a CD featuring various random, weird and tripped-out Who related tracks from the ’60s, and that song is – of course – the centrepiece…

[Seb Patrick]

Ouroboros contains the best non-set-piece (i.e. not the Rimmer Experience) gag in VII : “It’s an obscene phone call, sir…”

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>albeit I think he only knows how to do that because he?s a Yank (yes?)

I’m pretty sure he’s a Yank. Either that or he’s always playing them in stuff filmed in England (Aliens, Superman IV, that “don’t get run over” advert…)

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Does “Follow the Rimmer-shaped blur!” count as a Pete Part Two gag or a Pete Part One gag? Doesn’t it appear in both? Either way, it’s the only bit that actually made me properly laugh in either episode. Oh, but I do quite like “what’s the short version?” as well, even though it meant we had to sit through all the “WE’RE FINISHED!” bollocks as setup to it.

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Apparently so, yeah. Didn’t know about that one. Never saw it, like.

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THE PARTING OF THE WAYS IS FUCKING EXCELLENT. NNNG! BEST REGENERATION EVER! NNNNNNGGGG!

And I’m really not biased by the fact that my boss’ boyfriend directed it, because I thought that before I knew that. Seriously, though, it’s a fucking excellent finale. Better than the next two, anyway.

>the Time Lords apparently invented magic

No, but by harnessing a black hole, they gained power over the time vortex. Power that Rose uses to reverse things.

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Yeah, but :

Arrested Development > Curb Your Enthusiasm
The Office US > Arrested Development

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Was that at the Liverpool Adelphi, then?

Gah, to have known about these things back in those days!

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I HATE CATHERINE FUCKING TATE. HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE. HER NAME RHYMES WITH HATE, AND THAT IS WHAT I DO TO HER.

HATE.

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>Soneone should keep RTD away from writing utensils, computers and anything else he might use to create more half-digested plot tangles like this except under the strict supervision of a cowriter.

Lest we forget, RTD wrote :

– Rose
– The Parting Of The Ways
– Doomsday
– Smith and Jones
– Gridlock
– Utopia

Not to mention The Second Coming, which is one of the best one-off television dramas of the last decade. He has his missteps, but he’s writing approximately three times as many episodes as any other writer, and plotting the series, and producing it. He may be no Moffat, but without him, Moffat wouldn’t even be writing Who. So I’m prepared to forgive him the odd New Earth or Aliens of London.

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Aye, I thought Total Perspective Vortex as well. Along with the Someone Else’s Problem fields that the TARDIS crew had round their necks.

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He has a LOT of a lisp.

By the way, you’re incredibly lucky. But brace yourself for some utter, utter crap among the brilliance ;-)

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Don’t worry, you’ve got Steven Moffat’s two-parter to come next. All will be right again.

(we’ve just had a new Steven Moffat episode air in the UK, as well. And it was fucking *brilliant*. One of the absolute best of the new series to date.)

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Arlene : it is true that Rose’s supporting cast are annoying as hell in series one. It’s also true, however, that they improve immeasurably as series two goes on. Jackie is brilliant in “Love & Monsters”, and Mickey quite remarkably stops being irritating and starts to become a likeable hero both in the Cyberman two-parter (which finally gives him a bit of backstory) and in… well, I won’t spoil it for you, you’ve got all that to come. Suffice to say, by the end of the series, I actually began to feel sorry that it was the last we were going to see of them all.

“Fathers Day” is bloody excellent, though. First ep of the new series to make me cry, I think. And by no means the last. I’m so bloody psyched about the rest of the series, though – Cornell has raised the bar with “Human Nature”, but we’ve got a Moffat to enjoy, followed by the return of Captain Jack (another note to Arlene : wait until you meet Captain Jack. Just wait.), followed by what looks to be the awesomest and darkest finale yet, complete with JOHN FUCKING SIMM. Bring it on!

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I always used to think it was “Carry me to Titan…”

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The only problem with Dalek is that, in the shape of Bruno Langley’s Adam, it does actually feature someone who is genuinely a soap opera reject. And he’s rubbish.

But other than that, it’s a fantabulously great episode, and it’s a crying shame that Rob Shearman hasn’t been invited back to do another episode yet.

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Oh, Game On was dreadful. Inexplicably popular, desperately unfunny, and downright terrible.

[Seb Patrick]

May I assume questions like these will be answered in the second half?

Unfortunately, no. The second half is much, much weaker than the first. But! You get Dalek the week after that, so get ready to weep tears of joy – especially as, as a new fan, it’ll be the first time you’ve ever encountered one!

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Arlene, if those episodes are being shown in order on some network (which, with “The End of the World” followed by “The Unquiet Dead”, it sounds like), then I beg of you – please find and download “Rose” before you go any further. Otherwise you’ll be forced to sit through the pretty awful “Aliens of London” two-parter (of which only the first twenty minutes or so are any good), and you’ll be four episodes in and suddenly wondering what the fuss is about, because you won’t have had the memory of the brilliant “Rose” to counteract it.

However, you’ll then have “Dalek” immediately afterwards, and so all will be salvaged. And “The Long Game”, despite being crap, has Simon Pegg and Tamsin Greig in it. And then “Father’s Day” is brilliant. And THEN, you’ve got the “Empty Child” two-parter, which is THE BEST THING ON TELLY EVER EVER.

So, yes, what I’m saying is – even if you’re a bit underwhelmed after the next two weeks, STICK WITH IT!

[Seb Patrick]

He knows what he?s doing that guy (apart from maybe when Martha is stupidly stumbling across the stage during the number in Daleks In Manhatten).

Or when the Daleks are doing impressions of Sir Digby Chicken Caesar.

[Seb Patrick]

Bloody hell, if you think The End Of The World is brilliant, then wait until you see a Steven Moffat episode…

Get on that internet now, and download The Empty Child and The Doctor Dances, a two-part story that happens to be just about the best thing to have been on British television in nigh-on two decades.

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What episode did you see, Arlene? New series, or Classic series?

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Oh, I’d forgotten he was in that – he’s in the new show, as well.

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It should be Sec?s voice but more humanized.

No it shouldn’t, it has the human bloke’s mouth and vocal chords. So it has his voice, but with Sec’s intonation. You may think it sounds silly, but that’s how it should be.

In fact, there’s a part of me that’s wondering if the human Dalek is SUPPOSED to be completely shit and inferior. I get the feeling that Sec’s going to realise he’s made a massive mistake coming out of his comfy indestructible shell, and that the other three are also going to see him as weaker and attempt to off him…

[Seb Patrick]

Edited the subject heading – sorry, but I can’t bear to see it written as “Dr Who” ;-)

Anyway, this was ace. Loved the tie bit, loved Zovirax, loved Anne Reid, loved the new improved Tennant performance, and most of all, loved Martha. Even my girlfriend, normally a mega Who-sceptic, thought it was a great ep because she liked Martha so much.

This series is going to kick considerable amounts of arse.

[Seb Patrick]

Yes, I decided a while back to just sit still and not actually do anything until the movie is made – so I suppose I’m wasting my life, yeah.

I don’t actually have the faith in the prospect of the movie that some of my peers do. I’m not sure it’s all that likely to happen. It’s not that I don’t trust the efforts of Doug and all at GNP – it’s that I don’t trust the industry to make it happen. But ffs, no-one knows for definite that it’s not going to happen, just as no-one knows that it’s definitely going to. Some people are excited by the prospect, and to varying degrees. Others just aren’t. I doubt anyone’s life actually hinges on it, though.

And, as sceptical as I personally am, the one thing you have to keep telling yourself is this – no-one ever thought Doctor Who had a snowball in hell’s chance of making a comeback, let alone becoming the country’s biggest non-soap TV programme. No-one ever thought Spider-Man would come out of the rights hell that it was mired in for almost a decade (less time than the Dwarf movie’s been in the planning stages). Heck, no-one thought Indiana Jones IV would ever happen, either…

[Seb Patrick]

Excellent journalism there, making it sound like the fans asking “will there ever be a film” is based on us all being sad twats who are asking them to make something they’re not intending to, and not the fact that THERE ARE ACTUALLY PLANS FOR ONE.

[Seb Patrick]

“Go on, make a joke about that.”

“About what?”

“About… standing proud…”

“I don’t get it.”

“You know… a man’s… member. I’m not trying to encourage you, I’m just surprised you missed that one.”

[Seb Patrick]

Or Peter Jackson?

[Author]

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