What if ITV had produced Red Dwarf instead of the BBC?

[Jawscvmcdia]

Also, how would the show have differed depending on which ITV company had produced the first few series (i.e. how would the Tyne Tees’ version have compared to it being produced by say Thames/Carlton)?

Discuss.

Topic

[Bargain Bin Holly]

Instead of the BBC logo we’d see the ITV logo

[bloodteller]

well the episodes would be shorter because ITV has ad breaks, doesn’t it?

[International Debris]

Obviously there’d be lots of Benny Hill style chase sequences. Kochanski would be a regular and played by a busty blonde in a short skirt.

[clem]

John would have written End of Part One articles for every series.

[Flap Jack]

The pink policeman in Timewave would have been played by Al Murray instead of Johnny Vegas.

[flanl3]

He’d have done a better job, too.

[Taiwan Tony]

The only Paul Jackson produced sitcom for ITV that I can think of is Holding the Baby with Nick Hancock.

So. Judging by that, it would have been shit.

[Ben Paddon]

I suspect it wouldn’t still be on the air. ITV sitcoms aren’t known for their long shelf lives.

[Taiwan Tony]

>I suspect it wouldn’t still be on the air. ITV sitcoms aren’t known for their long shelf lives.

About the same as BBC, I’d say. Some have longevity; some don’t.
What they definitely aren’t known for, though, is their quality.

[Pete Part Three]

We’d be currently commenting on a Jawscvmcdia thread in a parallel universe called “What if the BBC had produced Red Dwarf instead of ITV?’

[Dave]

The BBC is no longer interested in the audience ITV used to attract.

[Flap Jack]

– Can’t Smeg, Won’t Smeg, Red Dwarf Night, Remastered, and VHS cross-promotions with Doctor Who would never have happened.

– Craig Charles would have presented Gladiators instead of Robot Wars, and he would have had a regular role in EastEnders rather than Coronation Street.

– Danny John-Jules wouldn’t have been in The Story Makers and M.I. High, he would have been in… I don’t know, My Parents Are Aliens or something.

– They wouldn’t have been able to fudge the filming schedule to redo The End, meaning The Original Assembly would now be the canon (and only) version of that episode.

Also Red Dwarf would have been cancelled after the first series, because The End: The Original Assembly is Not Very Good.

[flanl3]

The End is not very good, either. It does its job, but it’s pretty weak. From experience, people barely give half a passing shit if you only show them The End.

[Piplup2003]

>From experience, people barely give half a passing shit if you only show them The End.

I’ve had this experience too. Luckily, I broke from showing it to friends in chronological order and showed them Quarantine and Cured.

Also, we probably wouldn’t have as good DVD extras with ITV.

[Dave]

Kochanski would use the AR machine to visit Downton Abbey world instead of Jane Austen world.

[Ian Symes]

The only Paul Jackson produced sitcom for ITV that I can think of is Holding the Baby with Nick Hancock.

There’s also Girls On Top and Benidorm.

[Taiwan Tony]

I haven’t watched much of Benidorm. I felt like I saw enough, and could be wrong about it, but I didn’t like it.
But Girls On Top – I’m very fond of that. If only for Dawn and Jennifer.

[Hamish]

> But Girls On Top – I’m very fond of that.

More than we needed to know.

[Bargain Bin Holly]

>From experience, people barely give half a passing shit if you only show them The End.

I’ve been wondering about this too, I got my mom to watch the entire show chronologically which is how I got into the show too.

But I’ve been meaning to get my friends into it tho I know for damn sure their attention spans are smaller than last census taken for Antarctica; so I’ll probably use an episode like Demons & Angels or Psirens to get their attention whenever I get around to it.

[Ben Paddon]

One of my roommates wanted to watch Red Dwarf. He’s heard people singing its praises but knew nothing about the show. So, naturally, we started with “The End”. He was genuinely shocked by the crew being wiped out, and immediately wanted to watch the next episode.

“The End” can be an effective episode. It’s compelling, it establishes characters, it has some solid gags. It’s only a weak episode if you know what happens, which of course we all do.

[bloodteller]

The End is brilliant if you don’t know everyone’s going to die

[Taiwan Tony]

The End is brilliant.

[Dave]

Yeah, The End is great. Even if you know where it’s going (how many of us watched it as our first episode? Not that many, I bet) it works really well. I loved it when I first saw it. In fact I think the fact that you got a glimpse of the ship pre-accident was part of the appeal.

[International Debris]

Yeah, my girlfriend really liked The End when I introduced her to the show chronologically.

[Flap Jack]

True story: I only watched Red Dwarf for the first time because my best friend showed me the videos. He had been introduced to it by his parents (we were teens/pre-teens at the time).

We only watched Series 1-2, but we watched them chronologically, starting with The End. As you can see, it put me off completely and I never watched Red Dwarf ever again!

I remember when I first heard the name of the show, I assumed it was an epic fantasy series.

[Bargain Bin Holly]

I started with The End, I was so disgusted after first-viewing my fist flew through the television screen. After two months of wearing a cast later, I tried it again and it was ok.

[Ben Saunders]

My earliest memory of Dwarf is watching an episode with a Holly monologue at the start before school, leading me tok believe it was Waiting for God due to how the VHS bytes and our off-air recordings are structured. I’m still here.

[Dave]

I started with the Inquisitor, and was about to call my lawyer when something happened that made me laugh.

[bloodteller]

i started with Demons And Angels, because i was watching a load of old VHS tapes i had found. didn’t really understand much of it as i was only about 7 at the time and they don’t really re-introduce the characters every episode. after seeing it i often wondered why the man called “rimmaire” had a H on his head and why he inexplicably didn’t need oxygen.

[bloodteller]

my next experience with Red Dwarf was the IWCD novel which i found a couple years later in the bottom of a cupboard. found the novel to be excellent and i read it all on a long car journey but i must have got a bit too wrapped up in it because by the time the journey was over i felt a bit carsick

[Dave]

The Inquisitor and Dimension Jump were the two first episodes I saw, I think, and they both open in ways that make it quite hard to get a handle on the show and the characters if you’re not already familiar with them.

But I obviously liked it enough to continue…

[Bargain Bin Holly]

Opening with Dimension Jump would be quite odd I imagine, if it were me I’d probably think Ace Rimmer was the main character

[Pete Part Three]

I started with Future Echoes, so I’d like to think that I’d have enjoyed The End instantly too (but I didn’t see it until a few weeks later).

I’d definitely heard of the show before I watched it, as there were a couple of people in my form at school who were obsessed with it. They also spoiled Out of Time for me when I was still watching Series 1. I don’t recall being upset by spoilers, and recall visualize how that episode would work with the imagery of the first series. (The idea of Rimmer saving the day with a big gun was pretty baffling).

[Warbodog]

I caught a couple of scenes on one of the epic post-VI repeat runs (curry monster and his head bursting), but no proper episodes until the final stretch with Legion to Out of Time, then I saw only those five episodes repeated again a while later, so that was specifically what Red Dwarf was for a while until VII and videos expanded it.

I didn’t know if the Red Dwarf of the title had ever been in it (presumably in episode 1), but hoped they’d eventually get there and not be cancelled abruptly like The Pirates of Dark Water when they never collected all the treasures and just left us hanging.

[International Debris]

I caught the second half of Terrorform first – specifically from the bit where Rimmer was being oiled – and remember catching Back to Reality a couple of weeks later. Saw all of VI on first broadcast and then taped a repeat run some time after (with Dimension Jump replacing Rimmerworld, the latter of which I’d only ever seen once when the DVD came out, so it was practically a new episode for me at the time, which was really exciting). My mum’s friend lent me some I and II videos which sat very vaguely in my head until the remastered versions came out a few years later. Taped VII and VIII when they were first broadcast, IV during a repeat run and a friend taped V for me a few years later.

After watching them on repeat for a few years, I became really obsessed with the actual ship itself, and wanted to see the original model – the only footage I had consisted of the few distant shots in Dimension Jump, and the last couple of seconds of Nanarchy.

[Moonlight]

I was watching Pete Part 2, and I was about to phone my lawyer when something didn’t make me laugh. Then about 20 minutes later a single funny thing happened. I’ve been hooked on Pete Part 2 ever since.

[Bargain Bin Holly]

“I was watching Pete Part 2, and I was about to phone my lawyer when something didn’t make me laugh. Then about 20 minutes later a single funny thing happened. I’ve been hooked on Pete Part 2 ever since.” – Steven Spielberg, 1999

[tombow]

the boys would be stranded in Benidorm and have to beat Jonny Vegas in a pub quiz.

[Shoes Have Soles]

I geninuely can’t name a decent ITV sitcom that I have ever watch. I suppose Hardwire was ok- and it lasted 1 series. ITV had men behaving badly and then gave it to the beeb and it then became one of teh biggest british sitcoms of the 90s. RD would have been shown in a graveyard time and ditched after 1 series.

If Channel 4 had produced it on the other hand would be a different story……

[Shoes Have Soles]

I geninuely can’t name a decent ITV sitcom that I have ever watched. I suppose Hardwire was ok- and it lasted 1 series. ITV had men behaving badly and then gave it to the beeb and it then became one of teh biggest british sitcoms of the 90s. RD would have been shown in a graveyard time and ditched after 1 series.

If Channel 4 had produced it on the other hand would be a different story……

[Ben Saunders]

What if Red Dwarf was on Sky One sponsored by Dominoes Pizza?

[Taiwan Tony]

I thought Hardware had two series.

Is It Legal by the same writer was class.
The New Statesman was mostly good.

[flanl3]

What if Virgin Media had produced Red Dwarf?

[Lily]

>I genuinely can’t name a decent ITV sitcom that I have ever watched.

Don’t know what you’re talking about!

Kinvig

[tombow]

I always thought Rising Damp was ITV’s only really classic comedy. That and one of those racism sitcoms (the one that is similar to Alf Garnett but not as good)

[Bargain Bin Holly]

I genuinely can’t name a decent ITV sitcom that I have ever watched.

You didn’t like Mr. Bean?

[tombow]

I remember at one point in the early 90s my Dad started complaining that Mr Bean had gotton too nasty. We’d been huge fans but he felt Bean was becoming more cruel and selfish in his antics.

[Warbodog]

Was he confused about why Mr Bean was now wearing historical fancy dress as well?

[Ben Saunders]

That movie where Mr Bean had a gun and went on some spy mission was really weird

[Dave]

Mr Bean isn’t a sitcom.

[Author]

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