Home › Forums › Ganymede & Titan Forum › good or near-perfect line readings? Search for: This topic has 81 replies, 32 voices, and was last updated 1 month, 2 weeks ago by By Jove its holmes. Scroll to bottom Viewing 82 posts - 1 through 82 (of 82 total) Author Posts December 23, 2019 at 2:00 pm #256770 By Jove its holmesParticipant My two are: “You’ve ruined this, Rimmer!” and “This is going to be about waffles, isn’t it?” December 23, 2019 at 3:05 pm #256771 (deleted)Member “I swear, one time I caught this two pound black-ribbed knobbler” “Look at that! It’s a bucket and spade! Look at that… it’s, it’s clever that, innit?” (I’ve just realised one of my favourite Red Dwarf bits is in Pete. Something for everyone.) December 23, 2019 at 3:49 pm #256772 RidleyParticipant Not really, I need it to turn the lights on and off. December 23, 2019 at 4:21 pm #256773 clemParticipant “And then they did a jigsaw?” “It’s because I’m Hitler, isn’t it?” December 23, 2019 at 4:22 pm #256774 DaveParticipant “Ohhhhhh dear…!” (seeing brain-in-a-jar Lister in Out Of Time) December 23, 2019 at 7:43 pm #256782 q u i n n _ d r u m m e rParticipant Arnold Rimmer, his locker, this morning! December 24, 2019 at 9:50 am #256809 bloodtellerParticipant “Current under tension is equal? Current under tension is expandable? Current under tension is expensive? What does this MEAN?” December 24, 2019 at 11:19 am #256812 DaveParticipant The blue midget is loaded December 24, 2019 at 2:00 pm #256813 Ben SaundersParticipant Trumped up piscine Sawed off shotgun December 24, 2019 at 2:50 pm #256814 Stabbim the SkutterParticipant “He died in a plane crash. He was making love to his 14th wife and lost control of the plane.” “Have you got any pictures?” “…Well not of THAT, no!” December 24, 2019 at 5:09 pm #256815 Taiwan TonyParticipant I’ll second the Ohhhh dear. And I’ll add “And then, I’m going to have you.” Basic stuff, but perfect. December 24, 2019 at 5:11 pm #256816 Taiwan TonyParticipant Craig looking at the photographs of Robert’s erect penis was pretty perfect as well. December 24, 2019 at 7:16 pm #256819 Plastic PercyParticipant “Man, that’s a fine present. He was probably only expecting a tie.” December 24, 2019 at 7:57 pm #256820 Paul MullerParticipant “We’re still in deep space sir, only now we’re in deep space in the 15th century!” Also the slightly deflated “Well, yes.” that follows Rimmer’s line. December 27, 2019 at 9:00 am #256832 Pete Part ThreeParticipant “And you think that’s mine? It’s not possible there is an Andy Hitler or an Ainsley Hitler? And even if it did stand for Adolf, it doesn’t necessarily mean that it is mine… Oh no that it is mine.” I think most people watching that knew how the line was going to end, but the line reading is so good. December 27, 2019 at 11:15 pm #256841 JoeParticipant Reduced!? December 28, 2019 at 12:18 pm #256843 pi r squaredParticipant …but the line reading is so good. It really is. On the night of recording, they did that bit a good 5 or 6 times (with, if I recall correctly, variations of the ‘A’ names used instead of Andy and Ainsley) and the “it is mine” line and delivery got a huge laugh every single time. Also from a guest performance, the brilliant “I’m sure there’s no cause for oh dear” in M-Corp is also one of my favourites. December 28, 2019 at 10:58 pm #256849 Taiwan TonyParticipant “You can’t have been a full member of the golf club, then.” I cite this one because it’s so easy to fuck it up and he does it excellently. January 9, 2020 at 3:41 am #256965 Ben PaddonParticipant “Well, it means you’ve got a more tasteful cockpit.” One of my favorite Holly jokes, one of Hattie’s best reads. January 9, 2020 at 6:40 am #256966 Ben SaundersParticipant Almost every Hattie line is delivered well, even when it’s just exposition about opening doors January 9, 2020 at 12:40 pm #256967 VeniMember I’m shocked she never got an Emmy January 11, 2020 at 1:25 am #256989 performingmonkeyParticipant Norman – ‘and then they did a jigsaw’ (Thanks For The Memory) Chris – ‘It’s you, isn’t it.’ (Timeslides, maybe my favourite line from all of Dwarf) Craig – ‘It’s not about the Stirmaster anymore Kryten!!!!!’ (Trojan, lmao well perhaps not, but whatever) – ‘Souper!’ Danny – ‘I’d prefer chicken!’ (Better Than Life) Robert – ‘I have a medium-sized fire axe buried in my spinal column.’ (The Inquisitor)t January 11, 2020 at 8:08 am #256991 (deleted)Member Oh, Danny’s “I will!” after his bulk order of trout a la crème. January 11, 2020 at 8:14 am #256992 Ben SaundersParticipant It’s always wwwwiiiinnnnneeeeee January 11, 2020 at 8:38 am #256993 DaveParticipant “Well junior angler’s the best you’re gonna get out of me, buddy!” January 11, 2020 at 9:12 am #256994 Captain BollocksParticipant Look, Lister, there’s no point feeling sorry about Holly. It’s a kindness. Like a blind old incontinent sheepdog, he’s had his day. Take him out to the barn with a double-barrelled shotgun and blow the mother away. January 11, 2020 at 10:43 pm #256996 Taiwan TonyParticipant Well I say let’s get out there and twat it. I mean, it got its own t shirt for fucks sake January 11, 2020 at 10:45 pm #256997 NoFroParticipant “Maybe you can stick a spike in your head and pretend you’re the Taj Mahal!” “Who? Only a Yogurt.” “Someone who badly needed a pen.” January 11, 2020 at 11:48 pm #256998 HamishParticipant Not a joke, but I always like how Craig says “stacked to the gills” in Rimmerworld. January 12, 2020 at 12:27 am #256999 siParticipant I’ve always chuckled at The Cat’s “Someone get me a brandy!” in Camille. January 12, 2020 at 3:42 am #257000 Captain BollocksParticipant I… am Tarka Dal. January 12, 2020 at 8:30 am #257001 Pete Part ThreeParticipant “Well, this is awful. I’ve got you down for sprouts almost every meal. I tell a lie. It is every meal” It’s Gordon Fucking Brittas. January 12, 2020 at 6:23 pm #257017 VeniMember It’s not comedic, but Craig’s delivery of: “I’m pretty cool, I don’t take any smeg, and even though I’m disgusting, sometimes I can be quite brave.” Is brilliant. I love his inflection on “disgusting” leading into “I can be quite brave”, such a lovely way of emphasizing the negative into a positive. January 14, 2020 at 9:26 am #257050 MANI506Participant Do I ever find my singing tie pin. Listen butter pat head. I agree with Veni and appreciate BTE more and more for Lister’s character stuff. January 14, 2020 at 10:58 am #257051 McAleeChParticipant Cat, from Entangled: “We’re all really sorry, bud. Apart from me, and him, and him.” That episode may fall apart as it gets further along, but the parts that weren’t hastily rewritten had some great stuff. January 14, 2020 at 3:09 pm #257057 Seb PatrickKeymaster It’s already been said, but “It’s you, isn’t it?” is probably The One for me. And “I’ve always got a pen.” January 15, 2020 at 1:30 am #257066 VeniMember “Oh please sir, don’t order me to help you, you know how much I hate helping you!” January 15, 2020 at 4:21 am #257067 srmcd1Participant “Then I say fight.” January 15, 2020 at 1:35 pm #257068 Ben SaundersParticipant “I’m so gorgeous, there’s a six-month waiting list for birds to suddenly appear every time I am near.” January 16, 2020 at 6:51 pm #257081 Captain BollocksParticipant “I’ve been reading that fire exit sign over there.” January 16, 2020 at 7:14 pm #257082 Dax101Participant “quick, let’s get out of here before they bring him back” January 16, 2020 at 8:19 pm #257083 DaveParticipant “they were gonna sort that out in the dub” January 16, 2020 at 8:23 pm #257084 Pete Part ThreeParticipant “Noel Edmonds….gotta be Noel Edmonds” The re-record of “Smeg Ups….gotta be Smeg Ups” was not nearly as good. January 16, 2020 at 9:04 pm #257085 clemParticipant “I owe my life to him.” January 17, 2020 at 1:43 am #257094 GlenTokyoParticipant “Morning!” from Stoke me a clipper is great. That whole scene opening is, VII’s style used well, love that pan across the cockpit. January 17, 2020 at 6:29 am #257095 Pete Part ThreeParticipant “Have you got a pen?” ..is the only thing in Entangled worth keeping. Throw the rest in a burning bin, including the context of the line (a shit character has just been killed off and no one cares) , but Criag’s delivery is brilliant. January 17, 2020 at 6:30 am #257096 Pete Part ThreeParticipant Yes. Criag. January 17, 2020 at 8:57 pm #257104 HamishParticipant Good or near-perfect cast naming. January 17, 2020 at 11:11 pm #257105 srmcd1Participant “Rimmer, you couldn’t pull a rotten tooth out of a dead horse’s mouth with that one!” January 18, 2020 at 5:26 pm #257121 NoFroParticipant Just rewatched Justice and the whole of that courtroom scene is full of great line readings with Bobby obviously stealing the show. January 18, 2020 at 10:04 pm #257124 q u i n n _ d r u m m e rParticipant The rate this thread is going we’ll have voted every line in every episode good or near perfect. Except for “Starbugs thrusssster” from Cured January 18, 2020 at 10:12 pm #257125 GlenTokyoParticipant >Except for “Starbugs thrusssster” from Cured On the shit list list with “curly shoes and Hugh mass” and “telescape” January 18, 2020 at 10:14 pm #257127 GlenTokyoParticipant Oh, and for pure grammatical wrongness “I can’t actually see quite clearly” from Out of Time January 19, 2020 at 3:54 am #257132 performingmonkeyParticipant ‘The thought occurs…’ all of that is awesome. Also, the whole of the ‘well it probably is deja vu’ scene, from Future Echoes, aka one of the best scenes in all of Dwarf. January 19, 2020 at 4:45 am #257134 VeniMember Every scene from Legion, which has my favorite scene of all of Red Dwarf in it. “Ah, Legion, we have considered our position, and have decided our best option is to make a new life here with you!” *reveal of the greatest sight gag in Red Dwarf history* “You truly believe I would be deceived by that schlock plan from Revenge of the Surfboarding Killer Bikini Vampire Girls?” I have vivid memories of laughing my ass off at that scene in particular and I never did laugh at Red Dwarf very much. Also I’ve gained further appreciation for Chris’s delivery of “here with you!” and how obviously phony it sounds (it sounds cut-off so there’s probably a deleted scene but I don’t care). January 19, 2020 at 4:49 am #257135 VeniMember Honestly, I can write an essay on that scene. How fast-paced the gag is setup and paid off, the complete and utter crapness of the fake Lister coupled with the dramatic walk Legion does toward the table, and the sheer concept that the boys are so idiotic that proves to be their best escape plan. I love, love, love it. But anyway, this isn’t about the line itself really, so don’t mind me. January 19, 2020 at 9:51 am #257137 DaveParticipant Legion is brilliant. January 19, 2020 at 10:03 am #257138 DaveParticipant Rimmer’s monologue about why Lister is like his sandwich is one of my favourite bits of Red Dwarf full stop, and I think a lot of that is in the delivery. January 19, 2020 at 10:04 am #257139 DaveParticipant Also: “Because there are nooooo soooounds to hear.” January 19, 2020 at 10:46 am #257140 q u i n n _ d r u m m e rParticipant Also: “Because there are nooooo soooounds to hear.” This is probably my favourite suggested so far. January 19, 2020 at 2:06 pm #257141 Ben SaundersParticipant One of my favourite line deliveries in Red Dwarf is in The Inquisitor: “…and compete in tales of blood-chilling teh-rawrr.” Why is he being so dramatic lmao January 19, 2020 at 6:22 pm #257146 clemParticipant Yeah the Surfboarding Killer Bikini Vampire Girls stuff gets me every time, beginning with Lister’s description of the plan as ‘truly award-winning’. The reveal of the front of the sculpture with the face drawn on, the ‘schlock plan’ line, and Lister behind Legion in just his union suit, struggling with the other sculpture, is superb. Really builds beautifully. Little wonder Legion finished second in the World Cup of Guest Characters. ‘Yes, of course. Primitive. So basic’ as he pulls the wires out of Rimmer’s light bee is another highlight of an all round excellent performance. January 22, 2020 at 4:21 am #257200 GlenTokyoParticipant Duct Soup after Kryten Heimlich’s Kochanski, he says “So if worked then?” She pauses and replies “Noooooo it didn’t work!” and while it’s not a particularly hilarious line in one of the worst episodes of Red Dwarf, it’s delivered brilliantly imo. January 23, 2020 at 2:02 am #257220 RidleyParticipant Baton twirling practice. January 23, 2020 at 9:58 am #257222 (deleted)Member “When most people think of classic wines, they are unlikely to consider the Estonian reds, yet Estonian grapes are among the fruitiest and most subtle!” Mostly because of the way Danny sings the word “fruitiest”. January 23, 2020 at 12:01 pm #257227 DaveParticipant Yes, that is good. January 23, 2020 at 1:49 pm #257228 q u i n n _ d r u m m e rParticipant “see you in 10 minutes” … the 3rd one though, that’s when he nails it. The rest aren’t as good imo. January 23, 2020 at 5:15 pm #257231 siParticipant “Goodness me, it’s Marilyn Monroe!” January 24, 2020 at 2:48 pm #257236 Ben SaundersParticipant No particular line, but I love the main cult leader dude in Siliconia. A lot of the guest performances in the Dave era are a bit shit, but he really has a unique cadence to the way he speaks, and really involves himself in the role, it’s great to see. January 24, 2020 at 4:28 pm #257237 q u i n n _ d r u m m e rParticipant “he’s so warm and snuggly” January 24, 2020 at 4:29 pm #257238 q u i n n _ d r u m m e rParticipant Or basically anything from Mr Rat. Danny absolutely nails that performance. January 24, 2020 at 10:54 pm #257241 Ben SaundersParticipant YEAH. January 25, 2020 at 12:09 am #257242 VeniMember “Sometimes they even sleep with me.” “MMMMMMMMMMMH. Yeah.” It’s amazing they pulled that one off. January 25, 2020 at 2:11 pm #257258 Pete Part ThreeParticipant That’s what Lister said. March 20, 2020 at 12:48 pm #258126 DaveParticipant “Jump-starts the second big bang?” The perfect mixture of contempt and incredulity. April 7, 2020 at 12:25 pm #258421 UnrumbleParticipant Couple of classics from a scene in an episode stuffed with them: Rimmer : You? You’d sacrifice your life for the good of the crew? The Cat : No, I’d sacrifice *your* life for the good of the crew! Rimmer: Yes, but the thing is, about Captain Oates; the thing you have to remember about Captain Oates; Captain Oates … Captain Oates was a prat. If that’d been me, I’d’ve stayed in the tent, whacked Scott over the head with a frozen husky, and then eaten him. August 7, 2020 at 11:19 pm #259973 RubberParticipant “Then again, possibly not.” August 8, 2020 at 12:09 am #259976 Renegade RobParticipant Rimmer: “Oh, THAT.” From Justice, not the similar gag from Terrorform, which has a decent delivery, but not as perfect as in Justice. August 8, 2020 at 5:50 am #259978 Ben SaundersParticipant Cat and Lister miming Rimmer’s MacGruder story in Thank for the Memories, followed by Cat’s THAT MANY?! August 9, 2020 at 3:11 pm #259991 ARossiEsquireParticipant “And that includes the time it took to eat the PIZZA!” August 22, 2020 at 1:01 pm #261103 DaveParticipant “Our main rivals sir, the stairs.” November 29, 2020 at 1:36 pm #263483 By Jove its holmesParticipant Lister put it perfectly to Kennedy: “Where i come from you’re a liberal icon! But, to be that person, you’re going to have to sacrifice your life“. Author Posts Viewing 82 posts - 1 through 82 (of 82 total) Scroll to top • Scroll to Recent Forum Posts You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Log In Username: Password: Keep me signed in Log In