LET’S SWEAR!

[John Hoare]

I was watching a Series 1 Brittas episode today, and was shocked to hear the phrase – said very angrily, followed by an attack on Brittas – “beat the everlasting shit out of him”.

This went out at 8:30pm on BBC1! You would *never* get that now, would you?

TV channels seem to have become a lot more restrained in their use of swearing. I remember when Eastenders used to have ‘bastard’ in in the 90s, but you don’t get that now, either…

Topic

[Smeg4Brains]

I thought this was just going to be a thread to go CUNT, WANK, BASTARD, ASS, FUCK A SHITTY ARSE HOLE!

[John Hoare]

THAT-CHER

[mick]

This fucking thread is a huge bastard pile of turgent puss filled shit, the fact I wasted precious seconds of wanking time reading this inane load of bollocks, just goes to prove what a depressingly barren life I lead.

Yet another example of the utterly extraneous accumulation of dog shit I had come to expect from this fucking message board, in fact I would rather reach my head over my fat frame and suck the putrid sweat of my big saggy balls, than read another one of your motherfucking moronic anally retentive threads, you cunt!

So thank you John, you stinking excrement munching twat bag, for delaying the satisfaction of my cock for several minuets, I’m off to ram a peeled banana up my arse and drink some bleach.

…is that perhaps the kind of thing you expected Smeg4Brains?

[Smeg4Brains]

> is that perhaps the kind of thing you expected Smeg4Brains?

………………….I’m scared now.

[Danny Stephenson]

why a peeled banana?

[mick]

I’m not a savage you know.

[Tarka Dal]

Are you sure? I (excuse the pun) swear I’ve heard some good old fashion cussing in Eastenders. A friend of mine always believed they had a seasonal budget. So many bastards, bollocks, buggers and shits they could use in a calendar year.

[John Hoare]

I’ll admit I haven’t watched much Eastenders recently. But I remember Mandy saying bastard loads in episodes in the 90s, and I haven’t seen it at all recently. Maybe I’ve just missed them all.

But shit would *definitely* not make it into a 8:30pm family sitcom these days, I’m sure.

[mick]

About 5 years back The Bill went through a stage of saying “Piss” all the time :-/

[Arlene Rimmer BSc SSc]

Anyone else remember how surprised the cast was, during the commentary for the episode “Backwards”, that Craig got to use the word “bastard”?

[Andrew]

> But shit would *definitely* not make it into a 8:30pm family sitcom these days, I?m sure.

I agree, but possibly for different reasons.

Shit is still a ‘pre-watershed’ word – if only, really, for the 8pm-9pm slot. I think WRITERS are self-censoring, playing to what they think family viewing is. I don’t think it’s an edict from the broadcasters at all. It slips though in movies that start in late evening, so there’s no hard and fast ruling.

If anything, it’s the nature of pre-watershed sitcom writers right now. Paul Mendelson has been writing forever, but didn’t often use ‘language’ May to December or So Haunt Me. And as for Fred Barron, well, he’s coming off American TV – where characters can maim and kill as much as they like, so long as they don’t say ‘shit’ while they do it, or a reveal a real, human booby.

[John Hoare]

That’s very interesting. I hadn’t thought of it like that, but I bet you’re right.

I think part of the reason I was so shocked at the Brittas usage is that it was said so *violently* – as a preamble to the man attacking Brittas. If it had just been tossed off as a mild “oh, shit”, I wouldn’t perhaps have noticed so much. I’m still slightly shocked it got through in that context in 1990, and it’d be interesting to know if there was any discussion about it at the time.

[peas_and_corn]

well, I’ve heard ‘shit’ said in 8.30 shows all the time. fuck and cunt is where the line is drawn, that’s 9.30 onwards.

[John Hoare]

Which shows? And what channels?

[peas_and_corn]

to be honest I don’t really take much note of these things. I know the law and order shows do so at times (channel 10). That it’s a drama makes no difference because language rules are based on the time they are broadcast, not the type of show they are.

http://www.cbaa.org.au/content.php/345.html part 5.6

http://www.oflc.gov.au/resource.html?resource=62&filename=62.pdf page 13

Thus, from 8.30 bad language can be used (of course, it will have an M rating slapped on it, but that means very little)

[John Hoare]

Ah, right – I’d forgotten you lived in Australia. It doesn’t surprise me at all that it’s more frequent there to be honest, which is meant as a good thing…

My favourite swearing moment in sitcom has to be in the hugely underrated Gimme Gimme Gimme: “I want my men to stand up for something, not to be so far back in the closet they’re in fucking Narnia!”

[Andrew]

I LOVE that line. Not just in itself, but the timing in the episode and the delivery were just spot on.

[Arlene Rimmer BSc SSc]

Not to be too horribly off-topic, but how much of an idiot would I sound like were I to ask what precisely the term

?pre-watershed?

meant? Please explain this term for the chronically ignorant Yank.

[mick]

Traditionally in the UK 8:30pm is the time when home owners go outside and hose down their garden sheds with cold water to keep them clean and prevent heat from expanding and cracking the wood.
Therefore the term pre-water-shed refers to anything before 8:30pm GMT.

Unfortunately nowadays water shedding is becoming a rare occurrence in the UK. Since the great shed price crash of 1991 people tend to just replace the shed cheaply every four years or so, instead of taking any precautionary measures to help it last longer.

Sad really :(

[Arlene Rimmer BSc SSc]

Ah. That explains a lot; thanks!

[Andrew]

LOL

It’s just a cut-off point – a recognised time where broadcasters can start showing more adult programming. Because it’s recognised nationwide, it prevents Offended of Berkshire writing in to talk about the rude words they heard while watching with their easily-traumatised child.

There’s no real correspondence to movie certification – some Who episodes shown at 7pm have been given 12 ratngs on DVD – but as it gets later, content is expected to get stronger, with anything after 9pm a judgement call for parents with young children.

As we’e discussed, words like ‘shit’ can appear before 9pm, but it’s the earliest you can get away with ‘fuck’ – and even then different channels have different sensibilities based on quantity and context. Some prefer to wait until 10pm, except for specific instances. Similarly, sexual content and violence are generally tame pre-9pm.

[Arlene Rimmer BSc SSc]

It sounds a bit like the difference in content between “prime time” and “late night” on network TV here, actually.

edit: I’d also like to note that it’s not nice to pull the leg of an ignorant Yank =P . Of course I knew right away that I was the recipient of some funning, but it’s the principle of the thing that counts.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

[Jo]

>edit: I?d also like to note that it?s not nice to pull the leg of an ignorant Yank =P

Mick! Leave Arlene’s legs alone!

[mick]

*puts cock away*

[Smeg4Brains]

> Mick! Leave Arlene?s legs alone!

You need to at least flirt before you grope her legs……try the wormdo line.

[mick]

Im shit at flirting, I generally just whip out my cock and go “well!?”

[John Hoare]

Best Two Ronnies sketch EVUR. Bad quality, but stick with it, because it’s marvellous. I love the fact that they got away with an implied cunts on primetime BBC1!

(Although it does bring into question yet again Ronnie Barker’s attitude towards comedy – he always complained about swearing and rudeness in comedy. Erm, so saying “fuck” in a post-watershed show is bad, and you can get away with putting ‘cunt’ into people’s heads in prewatershed comedy? I love innuendo and seaside postcard humour – but you can’t pretend that that stuff is fine, but as soon as you say ‘fuck’ you’re in dodgy terrirory. Some of the stuff they got away with just as rude. Something that NTNON pointed out – and they never accepted it. Barker is still moaning about that sketch in his biography…)

And also, in case anyone agrees with Norman Lovett that Barker was brilliant and Corbett was rubbish – Corbett is fucking *brilliant* in this sketch. His delivery of the line “That’s a f****** good idea” is much funnier than Barker’s, for instance. True, some of that is because of the repetiton – but it’s BRILLIANTLY delivered. The idea that Barker was the talented one and Corbett was a hanger-on is a huge load of bollocks.

[John Hoare]

My favourite swearing moment in sitcom has to be in the hugely underrated Gimme Gimme Gimme: ?I want my men to stand up for something, not to be so far back in the closet they?re in fucking Narnia!?

Actually, I’ll tell you why I love that line so much. Not just because it’s a great joke – but because NO OTHER word would do. If you take out the “fucking”, the joke isn’t hugely funny. And if you replace the “fucking” with any other word, then the line loses all the rhythm, and it’s not that funny either.

It’s a bit like a bit of Rutland Weekend Television, where they give a load of symbols at the start of the show to warn viewers of content, with a different symbol for each sentence:

“Bad language. Very bad language. Bloody bad language.
“Safe viewing. Very safe viewing. Bloody safe viewing.”

That joke would *not* work with any other word apart from ‘bloody’. Put fucking, or sodding in, and it’s just not as funny…

Speaking of RWT – I want more stuff in comedy like this, please. In fact, I could link to RWT all day. “I rape for Luton Town…”

[John Hoare]

Another great swearing joke, in ‘Allo ‘Allo – Herr Flick answering the phone:

“Flick, the Gestapo? No, I said Flick, the Gestapo?”

[Danny Stephenson]

‘Sodding’ is one of those swear words, that isn’t really used anymore is it?

[Arlene Rimmer BSc SSc]

It all depends on how you use “sodding”, I guess — it just has a certain rhythm, a certain context in which it sounds perfect. Rowan Atkinson, for instance, can use it to terrific effect when he plays Edmund Blackadder.

But “fucking”, for instance, can be put in just about anywhere (in fact, lots of people do exactly that), so it gets more frequent use, I think.

[Smeg4Brains]

> Another great swearing joke, in ?Allo ?Allo – Herr Flick answering the phone:

I take it you were watching the Return of ‘Allo ‘Allo last night then? I found that line rather amusing as well.

[John Hoare]

Yeah, I was. I always loved the line, but yesterday’s show did remind me of it.

The Return of ‘Allo ‘Allo was a good show – indeed, in places, a great show – but I do have some issues with it. I may write a review, actually…

[Smeg4Brains]

I loved it
“Have you ever said anything twice?”
“Yes, I have. But only once.

[pfm]

The best use of the word ‘fuck’ in a sitcom is Alan Partridge ‘what’s the matter Alan, cone you take a joke?’. Again it’s all down to the timing and the fact that you probably wouldn’t get ‘fuck’ in any BBC show at that time. The best part is on the commentary where they say they told the BBC they didn’t have another take of a milder word to use when in fact they did. Again, no other word would be funny there.

Something that pisses me off is that The League Of Gentlemen couldn’t get the word ‘cunt’ past a 15 certificate. They had to use ‘twat’, which is fair enough. On the radio series they used ‘bitch’ I think, or ‘slag’ or something. Personally I think ‘twat’ is funnier than ‘bitch’ which maybe sounds more offensive for some reason. ‘Twat’ is just a funnier word.

[Danny Stephenson]

With Charlie and Stella, i think ‘slag’ would’ve worked better, the way ‘twat’ was used seemed a bit dischordant. Still funny, but I dunno….

[Pete Part Three]

The best use of the word ?fuck? in a sitcom is Alan Partridge ?what?s the matter Alan, cone you take a joke??.

I think that bit is the most I’ve ever laughed at the television ever. The tone Coogan delivers it in is superb.

NTNON = Best. Sketch. Show. Ever.

[mick]

It all depends on how you use ?sodding?

Well…

;)

[peas_and_corn]

“fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck”
-saddam hussein

[mick]

You fuck fuckity fuck fuck fucked Saddam Hussein?

He should have thought of a better last request.

[peas_and_corn]

his beard was scratchy.

[mick]

I bet!

…so how was he?

[Jonsmad]

Time to bring in an academic to further this swearing debate…

[peas_and_corn]

looks like it was recorded covertly

[Anonymous]

This thread isn’t dead yet, you fuckers.

What’s the rule with radio? People swear much more on midday radio 4 than on TV so there must be a different rule, like “no watershed necessary”, or something. Is it because teh childrens don’t listen to radio 4?

[Ian Symes]

There’s no official watershed for radio, it’s up to the broadcaster to be responsible. Radio 1 have got in trouble for bad language on the breakfast show – slap bang in the middle of the school run – but, like you say, midday on Radio 4 you’d be able to get away with it, as there’ll be no kids listening. Well, I used to listen to Radio 4 all day whenever I was off school, but I’m weird.

[Author]

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