John’s Roundup – 31/12/05 News Posted by John Hoare on 31st December 2005, 02:24 A few little things, then; the first couple nicked from Channel 27. Isn’t it nice to have another site doing news updates again? TOMB RAIDER: Not much to say, really – rumours are flying around that there might be a third Tomb Raider film, with Chris Barrie telling that reputable journal The Sun that a new flick is “on the slate”. How likely any of this is I don’t know; nor, frankly, do I care. Who wants to see Angelina Jolie run around with nice tits when you can watch Nicola Bryant do the same thing, with added SF stuff? MISSED DWARF: Ah, another poll conducted purely to advertise your company. Well, HOME MEDIA NETWORKS have done one on “Most Missed TV Shows”. Red Dwarf is in the Top 20, and therefore this is crying out for a big rant from me about how Dwarf hasn’t been forgotten and there is a huge fanbase and how the film would be a very good idea. Sadly, Stargate comes in at number 9 – a show which, as I’m sure I don’t need to point out, is still in production. Therefore, the people who voted in this survey are a bunch of stupid cunts, and so it means absolutely nothing. BANDWAGON: And finally: yes, I know I should be pleased that TV companies have realised that SF/Fantasy gets audiences. And yes, I’m obviously pleased that some great programmes are finally coming our way. But, if I may be an elitist twat for a moment… me, and I suspect most people who visit this site, could have told the TV execs this, erm, TEN YEARS AGO. And don’t give me that “convincing special effects are only possible on a small budget using CGI” crap – look at what Dwarf came up with in 1988, and look at the effects work London’s Burning used to be able to do. Oh, and yes, “In America, entire channels are devoted to big-budget space dramas.” That’s absolutely correct. Erm, but it’s also true in the UK, so I’m not entirely sure what their point is. DO SOME RESEARCH. Still, four million VHS/DVD sales for Dwarf, eh?
>Ah, another poll conducted purely to designed to advertise your company. This article has been co-written by Jar Jar Binks.
>> MISSED DWARF: Ah, another poll conducted purely to advertise your company. Well, HOME MEDIA NETWORKS have done one on “Most Missed TV Shows”. Correction. Me and the rest of my company MCC did. Well, HMN is our client, we did it on their behalf (this isn’t a weird joke, unfortunately it’s true). Most of the people who answered the survey are yanks. The CEO of HMN is the guy who invented IMDB. DYSWIDT? OK.
