Dave Lister’s Smeglewhack Adventure

[Podey]

Whilst searching for something earlier, it occurred to me there must a Dave Gorman-esque game in trying to find words that produce only one hit on the SmegaDrive. 

Anyone up for playing? 

Nearest I came (without going down the obvious “celebrity names” route) was two scenes with ‘Medium’.

Topic

[Technopeasant]

“Molester”

[Dave]

“Molester”

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

[Unrumble]

[Technopeasant]

Of course, by most legal standards Lister was molested by Michelle Fisher…

[Technopeasant]

“Rainforest”

 

“Marshmallow”

“(Un)assertive”

“Freeloading”

[clem]

Laboratory 


Herpes


Marzipan 


Bushy 


Hypnotherapist

[Warbodog]

Of course, by most legal standards Lister was molested by Michelle Fisher…

I figure she was a slightly older teenager rather than some predator who was into 12 year olds.

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

Isn’t she meant to be 16?

not that it excuses it, but I’m not quite sure it’s predator territory 

[Podey]

I think that’s what was meant by “by most legal standards”, ie statutory rape.

(… and “statutory” is not a SmegleWhack if you’re wondering, it has two instances).

[Warbodog]

16 isn’t specified in the episode or the novel, maybe there’s confusion with other references like Rimmer’s cousins who he wanted to get off with.

[clem]

Dabble

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

16 isn’t specified in the episode or the novel, maybe there’s confusion with other references like Rimmer’s cousins who he wanted to get off with.

I think the comment about her beauty and being able to work behind the perfume counter made me assume she was at least of working age

its also an incredibly weird way to describe a 12 year old, even if you’re 12 yourself. 

[Ben Saunders]

16 isn’t specified in the episode or the novel, maybe there’s confusion with other references like Rimmer’s cousins who he wanted to get off with.

The jailbait ballgirl, assumedly. But the golf bunker shagger is definitely older from the way he talks about her, plus the working thing.

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

Ah the ball girl, that’ll be it

[Warbodog]

I thought it was just his young perspective on an older girl, but maybe it does mean that. It would make the episode a bit grosser, which already had the two main characters being turned on by Lolita.

Good old Red Dwarf.

[Dave]

[sleepey]

Croissants, crumpets, pancakes

And definitely smeggin’ flapjacks

[Ben Saunders]

Damn, I checked a few toastie-related words but not them all, so I assumed they were all lazily recycled in Mechocracy. 

[Technopeasant]

I think that’s what was meant by “by most legal standards”, ie statutory rape.

(… and “statutory” is not a SmegleWhack if you’re wondering, it has two instances).

As an out, I do believe some countries have allowances if the age gap is fairly narrow (like a 14 and a 16 year old), at least in terms of severity. It is true we are never actually given a precise age for Fisher.

“In Canada, the age of consent for sexual activity is 16. However, there are exceptions for close-in-age situations. Individuals aged 12 and 13 can consent to sexual activity with someone who is no more than 2 years older, while those aged 14 and 15 can consent to sexual activity with someone who is no more than 5 years older. Additionally, certain exploitative relationships, such as those involving power imbalances or dependency, are not covered by these exceptions.”

[Podey]

That’s a relief, now all we have to do is pretend Listy was Canadian all along. 

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

[Unrumble]

[Dave]

[Podey]

[Ian Symes]

[clem]

[Flap Jack]

[Dave]

[Warbodog]

[Dave]

[Warbodog]

[Dave]

[Dave]

[clem]

Realising that pretty much everything I know about Canadians is from either South Park or the parody song Canadian Idiot by Weird Al. 

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

[Flap Jack]

Legitimately a smeglewhack as well, by the way.

[Hamish]

As for Flap Jack’s earlier post, there was a dead moose in the ditch on my way into work, can confirm.

EDIT: My YouTube suggestions just now:

[Nick R]

Billionaire

[Technopeasant]

Realising that pretty much everything I know about Canadians is from either South Park or the parody song Canadian Idiot by Weird Al. 

And now… bizarrely, our age of consent laws.

“Nixon”

Given the context I’ll argue it’s a word and not a name.

[Technopeasant]

“A “Canadian” pizza typically refers to a pizza topped with pepperoni, bacon, and mushrooms, often with a blend of mozzarella and cheddar cheese. Some variations may also include tomato sauce and other ingredients.”
We also don’t call it ice hockey, just hockey.

[clem]

Equilateral

[Ben Saunders]

I would have thought Nixon would be mentioned in Tikka to Ride but then I know next to nothing about anything to do with US political history

[Moonlight]

I would have thought Nixon would be mentioned in Tikka to Ride but then I know next to nothing about anything to do with US political history

Nixon would’ve only come up if they referenced that famous 1960 debate with Kennedy where he went down in flames like a sweaty bag of flesh.

[Technopeasant]

You’d think Trump would have also become an expression by Lister’s time.

[Technopeasant]

“M’laddio”

[Flap Jack]

Adroit.

[Warbodog]

Does it still count if it’s said twice in the same unedited caption?

Shuttle

[clem]

Prolific

Gunge

Typewriter

Beefcake

[Flap Jack]

Sinuses.

Sibling, kind of.

From the same episode, curd.

Exposition.

A double. Crotchless and panties.

A triple! Offspring, village, and weathergirl.

And another one! Stimulate, dormant, and psychic.

[Author]

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