💩 Would you ever watch a Star Wars/Red Dwarf crossover? 🚽

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    Please discuss this topic.



    Don’t tell me what to do.






    I already have.



    Short answer , probably not. Now… a Star Trek crossover would be a different story ;D


    Ian Symes

    G&T Admin

    Of course I’d watch it, I run a Red Dwarf fansite. It would be pretty weird if I didn’t watch, and indeed write and podcast about, a collaboration between our show and one of the biggest franchises in the history of popular culture. What a strange question.



    That’s a yes, then?


    By Jove its holmes

    Wouldn’t Palpy just short-circuit Kryters with Force Lightning?



    I’d watch it if it featured Tag & Bink.


    Pete Part Three

    As long as it doesn’t retcon The Last Jedi or Only the Good.


    Ben Saunders

    Only if it retcons The Last Jedi



    The Last JeDay

    Luke Skywalker receives a message saying that he is going to have to die in two hours so that he can be replaced by the new model of Jedi, Rey. After a big blowout party where he drinks green milk from a sea-creature’s breasts and Yoda sets a tree on fire, he tries to fight against his fate by convincing Rey that the Jedi religion is flawed and there is no such thing as Jedi Heaven, only to reveal at the end that he still believes in the Force after all. After all, where would all the midichlorians go?


    Ben Saunders

    Excellent. Better than the film itself



    I watched a Red Dwarf / Coronation Street crossover…


    Plastic Percy

    The Empire Strikes Back to Reality.

    After crashing his X-Wing on Dagobah, Luke Skywalker awakes to find he’s spent the last three years playing the Total Immersion Videogame ‘Star Wars’ and is really Dwayne Dibbley.



    Rouge One

    Prequel in which a group of rogue simulants steal the blueprints for Red Dwarf so that Rimmer is unable to fix the drive plate properly.


    International Debris

    Phantom Menace is VIII, right?


    Ben Saunders

    No, The Phantom Menace was Episode I


    Stephen Abootman

    Luke Skywalker discovers that Princess Leia is his sister. After previously sharing a kiss with her, he realises that she would therefore be unable to take him as her lover.
    After much soul searching, he reluctantly decides “what the hell”, he just wouldn’t tell her.


    International Debris

    Luke Skywalker discovers that Princess Leia is his sister just after kissing her. Pretending he was asleep, he does an unconvincing “wake up” mime.
    “Oh, my god, what a terrible dream! Oh, hi, sis! It’s me, Luke, your bro! Get your big ol’ lumpy bum down here and give us a big hug!”



    Luke Skywalker discovers that despite thinking he only ever had a schoolboy crush on Princess Leia, there’s been a stealth continuity change and he now actually dated her for several months prior to the start of Episode IV.


    Plastic Percy

    A New Hope Defeats Despair, Despair – the Despair Squid.

    Princess Leia sends R2-D2 to find Obi-Wan Kenobi on the planet Tatooine, to let him know that the Death Star can be destroyed with the laser canons on the, whatsit, Esperanto.



    Luke! You are your father!


    Flap Jack

    Lister discovers that 3 million years ago he accidentally left his kitchen light on, and as a consequence has accrued such a debt that he is forced to become a carbonite statue in Jabba the Hutt’s palace.



    “Blue milk. Ran out of that yonks ago. Fresh and dehydrated.”

    “What kind of milk are we using now?”

    “Emergency back-up supply. We’re on the green milk.”


    Flap Jack

    “Dave, you switched off your planetary pool targeting computer. What’s wrong?”



    Rimmer is afraid to touch an active lightsaber. Every time it turns on he jolts and drops it, and it melts through the floor, and falls down to the next, and goes through _that_ floor too.


    Ben Saunders

    Dave Lister is a Mary Sue


    Flap Jack

    POE: “What? Am I the only sane one here? Why don’t we just do another lightspeed jump and escape into hyperspace?”

    HOLDO: “A superlative suggestion, Captain, with just two minor flaws. One, the First Order can track us through hyperspace, and two, the First Order can track us through hyperspace.

    Now I realise that, technically speaking, that’s only one flaw, but I thought it was such a big one it was worth mentioning twice.”




    A neurotic Luke Skywalker is left alone on a planet with only his inner demons for company. Our heroes must convince him that he is valued and loved so that a ghost version of himself with silly facial hair representing his once-lost self-respect can rise up and vanquish the villain that was created by his own personality flaws.



    Master, moving stones around is one thing, but this is totally different!

    Use the Force, Luke. Massive, *massive* Force!


    Captain Bollocks

    BLUE (HARVEST) (Dir. Kim Fuller & George Lucas)

    The crew of The Millennium Falcon begin bickering with each other in increasingly petty ways whilst travelling through a rather uninteresting region of space. Meanwhile, Han Solo begins having unwanted romantic dreams, so C3P0 attempts to solve the issue by taking him on a ride called “The Chewbacca Experience”.

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