Nine? News Firstly, Cappsy’s juicy ring has updated, with a Red Dwarf and Me by BBC Worldwide’s Ross McGinley (“VII and VIII are bottom of my list” – how’s that for selective and inaccurate quoting?), and an article by Gavin Hodgson on why he likes Red Dwarf Re-Mastered. For the record, here’s my list of things I like about RDRM: the re-editing of Rimmer kneeing Hollister in the balls in Stasis Leak (the original version being slightly dodgily edited so the actual impact isn’t shown); the backwards text in the end credits of Backwards; and the extra footage of Danny acting the fool at the end of Bodyswap. Things I don’t like: the mistakes in the end credits, on the released video version at least: “ROBERT BATHHURST” in The End, “Andriod Actor” in Kryten, and “Lisa Yates” in Thanks For The Memory (it should be Lise). Oh, and everything else about them. Secondly, it’s the obligatory Prop Store mention. The first niceity is Cat’s Nurse Costume from Only The Good… at £395; I actually quite like that sequence, perhaps against my better judgement. VIII can be a lot of fun when it’s doing what it’s doing well, even if it isn’t YER FATHER’S DWARF; and I quite like the 70s sitcom VIBE. And the second is another prop from VIII; the C Deck Schematics (going for £95), which is really quite interesting. Not that detailed in any way, but it would be nice for the wall. Thirdly, thanks to Daniel Pendleton for sending me some excellent news on a Junkyard Wars 2-hour special (specifically, Junkyard Mega-Wars: At the Movies), which I’ve been sitting on now for over a week. Ouch. An episode co-presented by Robert Llewellyn (first shown in the States on TLC on February 22nd), it featured teams from SFX groups ILM, KNB, and Jim Henson battling it out. No news on a UK airdate as yet (where it shows as Scrapheap Challenge, of course) – we’ll keep you posted. If only Robert kept his site more updated… Fourthly, here’s an article on a new red dwarf star that has been discovered. I keep getting irritating alerts about this through Google News, so I think you should all do your fair share of suffering too. Bastards. Fifthly, continuing G&T’s exploration into the big wide world beyond wanking and Red Dwarf DVDs, we have news (posted by Kajmanm of www.rdwallpapers.kgb.cz fame) of a Red Dwarf convention in Prague: Trpaslicon 2004 – Dimension Jump in Czech. Nice. Reading the translation reveals absolutely nothing, but is a good laugh. Anyway, it’s on between the 5th-7th March; have fun, anyone who’s going. The photos from the 2003 convention look great fun. I’d go myself, but I’d get LYNCHED. Sixthly, a couple of nice snippets from Austin Ross; a R1 Series III DVD Review, and also some nice piccies from Dragon*Con 2003; one of Hattie and Norman, and some just of Hattie (you’ll have to scroll down quite a bit). Lovely. There were hints a while ago that Dragon*Con were trying to get some Dwarf people for the 2004 convention, so here’s hoping. Seventhly, feast your eyes on what I would confidently term a very bad caricature of the Dwarf crew, missing all their essential characteristics. On a more general eBay note: describing your manky old copy of The End as “the pilot” does not make it something worth buying. You fannies, as Ian would probably say. Eighthly, don’t forget that The Hunt for Darwin’s Beagle is on BBC TWO today (Saturday 28th) at 8:10pm; this includes some model work shot by Peter Tyler and Mike Tucker at the BBC Model Unit. If they get a shot of Starbug somewhere in the background… well, I’d think it was rather unprofessional actually. And ninthly, I’m eating a 450g box of Mingles. And I feel sick.