Got a photograph, picture of News Now, if we can just about calm down for a minute, the Radio Times website has published ten brand new behind the scenes pictures! How quaint such a thing seems after a full length trailer and the announcement of a 500-strong gathering in the centre of London. But still, massively interesting pictures, among which are some spoilers for Back To Earth… Right so, you know the drill. Picture One: A man in a nice warm hat takes a hammer to Carbug’s back window. Hey! Either this is a plot point, or they locked their keys in it or something… Picture Two: Carbug being parked outside the Rovers. Hooray! Not much to say about this one, however… Picture Three: IT’S NOT KOCHANSKI’S FUNERAL, IT’S RIMMER’S! There’s pictures of both Series I-era Rimmer and Series VIII-era Rimmer, as well as a blank frame, and presumably some others on Lister’s side. Assumption has certainly made an ass of u and me – he’s mourning for Rimmer, not Kochanski, like you and Skeletor think. This puts a whole new spin on it, and says a lot about how Lister and Rimmer’s relationship has changed over the years. The first time Rimmer died, Lister took the piss out of his report book. The second time Rimmer died, Lister shrugged his shoulders and walked off. Now, he’s tending his grave. Are we to assume, then, that Series VIII Rimmer died at the end of Series VIII, and that the Back To Earth Rimmer is his hologram? Or it could be that Series VIII Rimmer doesn’t get brought back – hence Lister’s sadness – and that Series I-VII Rimmer turns up again having got bored of being Ace. Either makes sense. Judging on past form, it’ll probably be neither. Picture Four: Danny John-Jules’s big happy face. At least you can’t see his cock in this one. Picture Five: Cor, look at the green screen on that! Huge, and highly impressive. Of course, we’ve seen it in action as part of the trailer, and it looks as though the scale of the studio set-up is being beautifully realised on screen. Picture Six: It’s the portal gun and the tentacle! The RT write-up says they’re not sure what the tentacle belongs to. It’s the giant leviathan, obviously. Can someone please dig out that photo of the unused Despair Squid model, so that we can compare and contrast? Picture Seven: It’s a set we’ve never seen before! A big four poster bed and the like, but against a plain black background. Either a background is going to be comped in (you can key off any colour, it doesn’t have to be green or blue), or this is some sort of fantasy sequence. Or, neither. Or both. Nothing would surprise me any more with this production. Anyway, what exactly are Lister and Cat up to here? Picture Eight: SO MANY THINGS. Firstly, Robert and Doug having a lol with each other, excellent. But what’s going on with Kryten’s costume? In place of his normal chest monitor, he’s got some sort of sleek thing made out of different slats. And look! There are two girls dressed ostensibly as Lister! Are they supposed to be fans, or some sort of weird alternate versions? Picture Nine: Skulls. Strangely reminiscent of Knightmare. Picture Ten: Oh good, it’s Fan Club chairman and G&T regular James Bull. At least they had the good sense to cover his face with a gas mask. This shot is clearly from the running-around-getting-shot-by-a-big-bastard sequence. Which begs the question: where are they, if members of the public are required to wear gas masks? Join us tomorrow, when – the way things are going – Doug Naylor will announce plans to come to every individual fan’s house for a good old chat, whilst letting us all have a go on Sophie Winkleman.