Amazon US is Terrible at Red Dwarf ]]>

[Moonlight]

I went back to look at Red Dwarf on Amazon because today as I was looking up region-free Blu-Ray players and found one that flat-out stated that upscaling “adds details” and claimed they would look fantastic in HD, which reminded me of the bewilderingly stupid and bizarre way they labeled the Series X DVD as Red Dwarf: “X” (WHY THE QUOTES?). This is in spite of every other series listed correctly as Red Dwarf: Series I/II/III/IV/so on. VIII just just Red Dwarf: VIII though, and was branded with “Amazon’s Choice” (probably by mistake). I started to look through the product pages. Series VIII was by far my favorite, and will definitely be yours too.

The Series IX so far has seriously amateurish mock-up art like something I’d Photoshop when I was 14 (but my choice of cast pictures wouldn’t be nearly this stupid), and the entirety of its description is as follows:

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Those two ]s and a > are just kind of sitting there below the description of every single DVD and Blu-Ray.

Link: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01EKMKEW2/

Series I lists Kryten as one of the characters appearing on DVD for the the first time ever. Series II also claims that Kryten is now on DVD for the first time ever, because they literally just copied and pasted the Series I description with zero alterations or additions.

Series I: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00007AP31/
Series II: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00007AP32/

The Series IV DVD claims to be a follow up to the “spectacularly successful series I & II DVD’s”, because they copy-pasted the opening bit from Series III. This same copied bit calls Red Dwarf a “sci-fi spoof”, because only part of III the writer had seen was Polymorph back when it aired all he remembered was “Alien spoof”. In a similar vein I expect Series VI will be identified as a western and Series V a bowl-cut advertisement.

Link: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0000WN0ZU/

Meanwhile, the complete collection is having a stroke:

“Chicken soup machine repairman and intergalactic loser Dave Lister awakesuspended animation to discover he is the lone survivor of a radiation lis now three million years into deep space and the last surviving memberhuman race. Dave is soon joined by a hologram of his dead bunkmate, a liform who’s evolved from his pet cat, and a neurotic sanitation mechanoidTogether this unlikely bunch of heroes attempt to find their way back tounder the guidance of Holly, the ship’s senile computer, encountering a heap of smeg on the way.”

Link: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000GI3RZ6/

The special features are also all run together. How does something like this happen?

Series VIII meanwhile gets interesting:

“The nanobots have populated the ship with its original crew. This is especially good news for Rimmer, who is now a lot less dead, but is extremely bad news for everyone else. Locked up on Red Dwarf’s prison deck, the crew join the Canaries, a battle hardened convict army and not, as they first thought, the prison choir. Pity it’s not with the girl of his dreams. Pity it’s not with a girl.

Link: https://www.amazon.com/Red-Dwarf-VIII-Chris-Barrie/dp/B000EU1Q4U/

I have but one question: Amazon are fucking lazy sacks of shit on their product descriptions. The end.

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[Pete Part Three]

>I have but one question: Amazon are fucking lazy sacks of shit on their product descriptions.

That’s not a question.

[Taiwan Tony]

More a hypothesis.

[International Debris]

It was obviously a question written in the style of the Amazon US descriptions.

[Moonlight]

I’ve also been fixing up some of the Red Dwarf Wikipedia articles due to errors like Series X being claimed to have used the “Series 8 shooting model” of Red Dwarf. The only thing people will notice I’ve done is the main article now features the XI logo, but none of the 8000 tiny things. I’m obsessive. Long story short, the most bizarre thing I’ve seen by far was the following sitting in the Production section of Demons & Angels’ article:

“This episode features the last shot of the inside of Red Dwarf until Season 8. The irony is that the ship blows up and reappears at the end, only to not be shown again until Season 8.”

An actual question is why didn’t he just post a topic about it on TOS in the wrong subforum like a normal person?

I also have a hypothesis, but it’s filthy.

[Pete Tranter’s Sister]

KyoSo – Finding errors even that anal cunt John Hoare has missed since 2016.

[Nick R]

the bewilderingly stupid and bizarre way they labeled the Series X DVD as Red Dwarf: “X” (WHY THE QUOTES?).

I’ve used the Update Product Info link to submit corrections to Amazon title inconsistencies before – though only on books, never done it with DVDs. Occasionally they’ve even been accepted.

[Moonlight]

I’ve seen pages, Wikipedia included, that always make sure to spell it out as “Red Dwarf X” in full every time despite numbering other series as just “Series Roman Numeral” as you would expect. They actually think the series is titled Red Dwarf X as in the letter X, and that is without a doubt the worst fucking title possible. Does BtE not being called Series IX just throw a wrench into the works and confuse everyone?

I have another questions: do people actually know Roman numerals? Because if not that would explain everything.

[(deleted)]

BtE *is* called Series IX though! The style guide might shy away from it, but internally at BBCWW it’s known as Red Dwarf IX/Season 9 for sales, and internationally it’s often that too. The French DVD even renders it properly in Times New Roman in case you were ever in doubt.

[Moonlight]

Well yes, but generally the English-speaking fans will only see it labeled “Back to Earth”, and those are the people who are treating the X as a letter. I think they definitely would have labeled it Series IX from the beginning if they’d known for sure there would be more to follow. Back to Earth is definitely not a series because it’s a three-part special, but from a practical standpoint it has to be considered Series IX now (which streaming services do, but Red Dwarf is no longer on Netflix or Hulu in America) because it takes place chronologically between VIII and X. Not doing so would be absurdly confusing for first-time viewers.

But not as absurdly confusing as trying to figure out how the fuck this Red Dwarf: “X” fits into the whole mess.

[(deleted)]

Three episodes is a series, I’d say. For a start, it’s becoming pretty much industry standard for new UK TV comedies now. Six is almost a special luxury these days.

God, what a depressing paragraph.

[Ben Paddon]

Meanwhile, the complete collection is having a stroke:

Of note, this description of the show is what appears almost word-for-word on the complete series box set itself.

[International Debris]

I’ve often seen it referred to as a miniseries. To be pronounced min-izereez.

[Pete Tranter’s Sister]

Y’all been watching that Designated Survivor? It’s very good.

[Jawscvmcdia]

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[Jawscvmcdia]

I mean…

<img src=”http://i59.tinypic.com/15xwled.jpg&#8221;

[Jawscvmcdia]

Oh smeg!! One last go!

[Hamish]

> I’ve seen pages, Wikipedia included, that always make sure to spell it out as “Red Dwarf X” in full every time despite numbering other series as just “Series Roman Numeral” as you would expect.

I am sure the fact that Dave went out of their way to promote the series as “Red Dwarf X” in full rather than just Series X has nothing to do with this convention…

Just as the logo you upload says Red Dwarf XI now.

[Jimboid]

Funny how the show didn’t used to be numbered on screen… not until VII. It was just “Red Dwarf”.

Though the videos had the series number in the title. And the TV listings(?)

Actually, it’s not really funny. Just an observation.

[International Debris]

I preferred it when there wasn’t a number on screen. Partially because it felt like it was one ongoing thing, rather than being split into individual series, and partially because the numbering only came into play with VII and thus I will forever associate it with the ‘not as good as the best stuff’ era of the show, even if XI is definitely challenging that split.

[MANI506]

All the TV listings for III, IV, V and VI were numbered in the Radio Times. As soon as the numbers started appearing on screen the TV listings dropped them.

[International Debris]

Other than Blackadder (for very obvious reasons), did any other series differentiate between series on screen?

[Plastic Percy]

Spike Milligan’s Q series.

The first five seasons were titled Q5, Q6, Q7, Q8 & Q9, whilst the last series was titled There’s a Lot of It About.

[Pete Part Three]

Prime Suspect.

I spent a good 30 seconds trying to think of another one. And the best I have is Gruey, the late eighties children’s TV show starring Kieran O’Brien, that had a second series called Gruey Twoey.

That’s all I got.

Yeah, I think I’d rather that sort of stuff was kept to listing magazines. It’s quite an achievement a sitcom getting to 11 series, but as most shows are on their last legs by then, it possibly invites a fair bit of scoffing.

I guess Dave rely on the series numerals when they’re mainlining repeats, so are quite keen for it to be onscreen.

[Pete Part Three]

Oh, maybe Kappatoo and Kappatoo II. Another kids’ show. But I can’t say for sure that the II appeared on screen for the second series, as I can’t find it on YouTube.

[Jimboid]

How and How 2?

[si]

I think QI has some kind of system for differentiating between series.

[Jonsmad]

” and partially because the numbering only came into play with VII and thus I will forever associate it with the ‘not as good as the best stuff’ era of the show, even if XI is definitely challenging that split.”

The numbering came about With Red Dwarf III – The Next Generation. Red Dwarf II never existed in that name until the Video’s retro actively named that series first, before Red Dwarf I followed on video later on. So associating it with only Doug Naylor solo Dwarf onwards is just something from your viewpoint, not something that the show has put forward itself.

[Moonlight]

You know, they should go back and do some sort of new master that adds the numbering to every series. And annoying, distracting sound effects over Rimmer’s big scene impersonating the whole crew in Queeg.

Also I will say I wouldn’t mind nearly as much if people did the same “mistake the Roman numeral for a title” thing with any other series, it’s just that Red Dwarf X as in X the letter and not X the Roman numeral for 10 is an awful title, and I hate that some people think the show is supposed to be called that. It reminds me of watching and really liking Sonic X as a kid but being embarrassed to ever bring it up because the title was so lame.

The X-Files is a rare good use of the letter X in a title.

[si]

They could rename the last series after where Rimmer’s family is based.
Red Dwarf Io.

[Pete Tranter’s Sister]

Let’s not forget ‘The Blax & White Minstrel Show’ or ‘After Darx’.

[(deleted)]

All this talk of faintly cringeworthy titles pales when you remember that Grant Naylor’s next project lined up after VI and The 10%ers was ‘The Oo-Ee-Oo Dimension’.

[Pete Part Three]

>You know, they should go back and do some sort of new master that adds the numbering to every series.

That is kind of weird, hactually. They created a shitty, uniform opening sequence for the Series 1-3 Remastered, making a conscious decision not to brand them I, II, III onscreen….

…which is the opposite choice to what they started doing with the new episodes from the same time when the roman numerals started appearing onscreen.

[Taiwan Tony]

Television X? Which is something I’ve never seen.

Not for more than ten minutes, anyway.

[Ben Paddon]

Someone on YouTube did remastered versions of the opening title sequences, and they all had the series roman numericals in the logo (done in the same style as the VII logo) but most of them have been taken down by BBCWW.

[Moonlight]

I have thus far successfully managed to get Amazon to correctly list X’s as DVD as “Red Dwarf: Series X” and XI’s DVD and Blu-Ray as “Red Dwarf: Series XI”. Now every DVD and Blu-ray is listed consistently as “Red Dwarf: Series [Roman Numeral]” except for the VIII DVD and the Blu-Ray of X, which are just missing the “Series” part.

But at least nothing is called Red Dwarf: “X” anymore, which is somehow the wrongest possible way you could ever write even though it included all the right words in the correct order.

[Moonlight]

I recommended they rename the listing for “The Complete Collection” to “The Complete Series I-VIII” considering that by next year it will be 21 episodes short.

[flanl3]

I recommended they rename the listing for “The Complete Collection” to “The Complete Series I-VIII” considering that by next year it will be 21 episodes short.

As true as this is, you also have to consider that that’s the proper name for the product.

[Moonlight]

Actually it now occurs to me that just adding the 2007 release date in parentheses to the listing title would convey that fine without renaming anything.

Or maybe just let anybody who buys it expecting every new episode learn their lesson to actually read the product description next time. Yeah, that sounds better. They should’ve been grabbing the Blu-Rays of BtE and onward anyway.

[Author]

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