Home › Forums › Ganymede & Titan Forum › Norm’s post-Dwarf tell-all Search for: This topic has 317 replies, 60 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 10 months ago by locusceruleus. Scroll to bottom Viewing 100 posts - 201 through 300 (of 318 total) 1 2 3 4 Author Posts April 19, 2009 at 12:28 am #97535 JamesTCParticipant He will put it on his CV. April 19, 2009 at 2:59 am #97554 littlesmeggerParticipant > I don?t know what Norm?s problem is. He was in Back To Earth! Don’t let him know about that, he’ll add it to the Movie payments he’s apparently owed! April 19, 2009 at 3:18 am #97555 PhilParticipant Maybe it’s wrong of me to say this, but I would definitely buy his memoirs at this point. April 19, 2009 at 7:03 am #97559 Tyrell CorporationParticipant Yes, but you’re a cunt Phil. April 19, 2009 at 4:14 pm #97581 Ben PaddonParticipant You’re a jerk, Phillip Reed. A total kneebiter. January 16, 2011 at 11:01 pm #111374 Ben PaddonParticipant I can’t wait for this book to come out, y’know. I imagine a passive-aggressive rage seething from the spine of the book like a black oil. Books placed beside it on the shelf will rot and corrode, the pages becoming charred and damaged, the characters in the book becoming miserly and embittered about elements of the plot that they have no control over. January 17, 2011 at 3:52 pm #111376 CarlitoParticipant That could be a Stephen King novel. The Book of Bitterness. January 17, 2011 at 4:03 pm #111377 CarlitoParticipant Or at the very least, a plot from an episode of Charmed… January 18, 2011 at 2:38 am #111378 PhilParticipant How long does it take to write this shit? January 18, 2011 at 4:33 am #111379 Arlene Rimmer BSc SScParticipant Hey now. Norm can write his spiteful, petulant book-length tantrum quickly, or he can do it well; but he can’t do both. Have you no appreciation of craft? January 18, 2011 at 2:24 pm #111380 RidleyParticipant “How long does it take to write this shit?” – Philip J. Reed, Three-time NaNoWriMo Winner April 18, 2011 at 12:15 am #111873 JoParticipant I am amusing myself this evening by re-reading old threads such as this one :o) April 18, 2011 at 5:52 pm #111890 hummingbirdParticipant So, has he published that book yet? April 18, 2011 at 6:13 pm #111893 Pete Part ThreeParticipant Yes, he’s currently travelling round the country and pushing it, unsolicited, through peoples’ letterboxes. April 18, 2011 at 6:36 pm #111895 JimboidParticipant Are we still talking about the book? February 1, 2012 at 6:23 pm #114757 PhilParticipant :-O February 1, 2012 at 6:53 pm #114759 AlexParticipant But, as Norman points out in this fascinating inside look at the world of comedy, not everyone in the industry is as pleasant as their image would suggest. He is ready to spill the beans about those comedians and actors who he has found to be arrogant and rude. Needless to say, Norm had the last laugh. February 1, 2012 at 7:04 pm #114760 A BaileyParticipant Red Dwarf is only mentioned three times, I’m disappointed. February 1, 2012 at 7:14 pm #114761 PhilParticipant Not counting the unsubtle reference in the title itself. I’m genuinely looking forward to reading this. February 1, 2012 at 7:49 pm #114765 PhilParticipant Additional: More info and cover here… http://www.apexpublishing.co.uk/pubdetails.aspx?Num=266 As well as a few unique links from their main listings page: http://www.apexpublishing.co.uk/publicationlist.aspx?list=all …including one to a book extract, which leads to a placeholder pdf right now but could be replaced by something much more interesting soon. February 1, 2012 at 8:02 pm #114766 pfmParticipant Could he look more miserable on the cover! Maybe he should titled it ‘Bitter and Bald – The Norman Lovett Chronicles…Plus, Red Dwarf’ February 1, 2012 at 9:47 pm #114771 Pete Part ThreeParticipant “But, as Norman points out in this fascinating inside look at the world of comedy, not everyone in the industry is as pleasant as their image would suggest. He is ready to spill the beans about those comedians and actors who he has found to be arrogant and rude.” People in glass houses… I hope G+T get the serialization rights. February 1, 2012 at 9:51 pm #114772 siParticipant Wonder if he’ll be spilling the beans about those actors he has found to be legit? February 1, 2012 at 10:06 pm #114773 AlexParticipant He is ready to spill the beans about those comedians and actors who he has found to be arrogant and rude. February 1, 2012 at 10:10 pm #114774 PhilParticipant Needles to say…Craig took drugs. February 2, 2012 at 2:25 am #114775 anniescribeParticipant WHAT?! Comedians aren’t pleasant and friendly in real life? STOP THE PRESSES. THIS IS BRAND NEW INFORMATION. Maybe England has a different breed of comedian (??), but here in the U.S., I’ve really yet to see one that *isn’t* somewhat of a jerk and rude. (Come to think of it, I don’t know too many human beings who can’t be rude.) It’s just a matter of degree. February 2, 2012 at 3:20 am #114776 Ben PaddonParticipant From Amazon’s “About the Author”: Norman Lovett was born in Windsor just after the end of World War II but moved to Essex as a small child. He was bullied at school[…] Yes, I fucking bet he was. February 2, 2012 at 4:41 am #114777 JoParticipant Publication Date: 22 September 2012 Not that he’s hoping to take advantage of the new series in any way… February 2, 2012 at 10:06 am #114778 locusceruleusParticipant Norm’s lack of self awareness is astounding. The man who took to Myspace to publicly berate his former co-stars because he didn’t find their Breakfast TV appearance funny enough – a man who replies to Tweets of videos that were neither about him or sent directly to him with the comment that he’d ‘rather drink a load of ink’ than watch them – is going to tell you which comedians he finds ‘arrogant and rude’…? Also – G&T Interview, 2003, on the possibility of an autobiography: “I think if I was offered the chance I would love to” MySpace, 2009: “I have been asked to write an autobiography on many occasions” February 2, 2012 at 11:09 am #114781 Tarka DalParticipant So Norm v Iain Lee. Which side are you on? February 2, 2012 at 11:16 am #114782 JamesTCParticipant Whoever wins… We lose. February 2, 2012 at 12:43 pm #114787 JonsmadParticipant Extract from Talking head… “…and number 2479 concludes my list of comedians and people in the media that I dont like. Conversely I do find the broadcaster Iain Lee a wonderful man, I particularly like his efforts of seeking out people online who indirectly reference him as a cunt, and then putting them right about how wrong their opinions are, particularly when he does that to Red Dwarf fans.” February 2, 2012 at 12:54 pm #114788 Jason aka Smeg4BrainsParticipant > who indirectly reference him as a cunt Indirectly? Didn’t we have a forum post called “Iain Lee is a Cunt”? I’m not saying he isn’t one, but how much more direct can you be? February 2, 2012 at 1:06 pm #114789 Pete Part ThreeParticipant >Whoever wins… We lose. Whoever wins…they’re losers. February 2, 2012 at 1:52 pm #114790 Jonathan CappsKeymaster > Indirectly? Didn’t we have a forum post called “Iain Lee is a Cunt”? Yeah, pretty much. I’m really looking forward to this book, actually. I do wonder how vitriolic he’s going to be. Despite the recent and public disagreements with GNP, his DVD interviews weren’t that bad and I get the impression he still likes and respects his former co-stars. February 2, 2012 at 2:05 pm #114791 Pete Part ThreeParticipant Yeah, I’ll probably buy it. I expect it’ll be in the same vein as I, Partridge but slightly more delusional and fictitious. February 2, 2012 at 2:18 pm #114792 siParticipant Being the RD completist that I am, I imagine I’ll get it. I just really don’t want to have to pay for it. :/ February 2, 2012 at 4:41 pm #114795 ori-STUDFARMParticipant I won’t. I’ll just wait to see whats actually in it on this thread. But that’s because I’m a cheap bastard! February 2, 2012 at 5:31 pm #114796 PhilParticipant Can we expect a G+T review? February 2, 2012 at 5:35 pm #114797 JamesTCParticipant >Can we expect a G+T review? I’m sure Norm will review G&T in one of the later chapters. February 2, 2012 at 5:40 pm #114798 Jonathan CappsKeymaster > Can we expect a G+T review? For sure. February 2, 2012 at 8:35 pm #114800 Mr-StabbyParticipant I’m still waiting for… NORMAN LOVETT – THE ULTIMATE DISASTER MOVIE! STARRING BRUCE WILLIS AS NORM, A MAN BROUGHT TO THE EDGE OF INSANITY BY HIS DETERMINATION TO GET HIS BALL BACK! ALSO STARRING ANGELINA JOLIE AS DONA DISTEFANO, THE POCKET DYNAMITE SECRET AGENT WITH A HEART OF GOLD POSING AS AN ASSISTANT FLOOR MANAGER! COMING TO THEATERS 2012! Hell i’d go see it! February 2, 2012 at 9:31 pm #114801 CarlitoParticipant He’s fairly complimentary with his view of Dwarf on his newly revamped website http://www.normanlovett.co.uk/reddwarf.htm Even series VIII…. February 2, 2012 at 9:52 pm #114802 Pete Part ThreeParticipant The bulk of that was written long before BTE. February 2, 2012 at 11:00 pm #114804 Arlene Rimmer BSc SScParticipant >NORMAN LOVETT – THE ULTIMATE DISASTER MOVIE! This summer…he will get his ball back. Or die trying. June 1, 2012 at 3:48 pm #116673 PhilParticipant Cancelled? Specific release page no longer works: http://www.apexpublishing.co.uk/pubdetails.aspx?Num=266 And it’s no longer listed among past and future releases (it previously was): http://www.apexpublishing.co.uk/publicationlist.aspx?list=all Wha happen!? June 1, 2012 at 4:47 pm #116674 ori-STUDFARMParticipant He wanted to turn in a book half the length of the one he was contracted to do. they were okay with this, but wanted to reduce the payment of the book appropriately….Norm wasn’t having any of this. Besides, why does Stephen King earn more than he does. It’s not fair… June 1, 2012 at 4:55 pm #116675 siParticipant I’m not saying owt. He’s already blocked me on Twitter. June 1, 2012 at 5:11 pm #116676 JamesTCParticipant >He’s already blocked me on Twitter. Was that when you complained about him moaning on the Series VIII commentary? June 1, 2012 at 6:00 pm #116678 Ben PaddonParticipant Nah, it’s from when Si took his ball. (That’ll never get old.) June 1, 2012 at 6:01 pm #116679 Ben PaddonParticipant WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN NORMAN LOVETT AND ADOLF HITLER? HITLER STILL HAS ONE BALL. June 1, 2012 at 6:03 pm #116680 RidleyParticipant Hitler got his book published? June 1, 2012 at 6:27 pm #116682 JamesTCParticipant Hitler was in Series III and IV? June 1, 2012 at 6:47 pm #116683 siParticipant > Was that when you complained about him moaning on the Series VIII commentary? Yup. I wouldn’t mind if I’d @mentioned him, but his daughter just found me talking about him, told me off, and since then, on the odd occasion I’ve looked, I can’t see Norm’s tweets. Hence I never actually say “Norman Lovett” on Twitter. I usually just mention ‘Norm’ when necessary. June 1, 2012 at 7:15 pm #116691 PhilParticipant He searches for that, too. June 1, 2012 at 7:18 pm #116692 JamesTCParticipant Oh, it seems I’m blocked by him too. I have the “Loading Tweets seems to be taking a while.” on Chrome when logged in but when I use IE when I’m not logged in I can see his tweets. June 1, 2012 at 7:47 pm #116693 Ben PaddonParticipant Sorry, you can’t follow this user (because they’re blocking you). My guess? Norm searched for us all individually on Twitter just so he could block us. June 1, 2012 at 8:51 pm #116699 redhead85Participant > My guess? Norm searched for us all individually on Twitter just so he could block us. N’aww. Sweet. June 1, 2012 at 9:55 pm #116708 Ben PaddonParticipant Truly, he cares a lot. June 1, 2012 at 10:03 pm #116709 ori-STUDFARMParticipant Bastard! Now I have Faith No More buzzing around my brain! June 1, 2012 at 10:54 pm #116711 AlexParticipant Oddly I’m not blocked by him. What is the world coming to when Ian makes up with Iian Lee and me and Norm seem to be on ok terms? June 1, 2012 at 10:58 pm #116712 siParticipant It’s because of the Jubilee, I imagine. June 2, 2012 at 6:01 am #116730 Pete Part ThreeParticipant You’re not missing much, guys. June 5, 2012 at 1:49 pm #116638 PhilParticipant Possibly just delayed. Thanks Philip. Hopefully we will get to publish this title sometime next year. Best regards Chris Cowlin Production & Publishing Manager Apex Publishing Ltd June 5, 2012 at 6:23 pm #116641 pfmParticipant Norman Lovett’s Bald. July 30, 2012 at 9:55 pm #117294 Cloud StrifeParticipant I tweeted norm asking him when “his book of all the people he hates” was out. But he blocked me haha. July 30, 2012 at 10:16 pm #117295 AlexParticipant I’d imagine he’s more concerned with finiding somehwere to live at the moment to be honest, what with having set fire to his flat and all. July 30, 2012 at 11:24 pm #117297 Ben PaddonParticipant Wait, what? Edit: Oh! Well then! July 30, 2012 at 11:36 pm #117298 HelloMabelParticipant What does “all processions ruined” mean? July 30, 2012 at 11:45 pm #117299 siParticipant I saw that he’d blocked Robert Llewellyn as well. But yes, sorry to hear about his fridge and everything. July 31, 2012 at 12:06 pm #117343 ori-STUDFARMParticipant The same fridge that was a gift from Tony Hawk!He Tweeted that it looked a little ‘battered’ July 31, 2012 at 12:45 pm #117349 siParticipant You’d think any Red Dwarf cast members would get at least a discount on Smeg fridges. July 31, 2012 at 1:24 pm #117351 ori-STUDFARMParticipant They can…But Norm refused his discount and paid full price after discovering his discount was less than the other cast members. July 31, 2012 at 9:16 pm #117359 Ben PaddonParticipant I think he set his own fridge on fire, personally. July 31, 2012 at 10:00 pm #117362 ori-STUDFARMParticipant When the packet says “Cook from frozen”, that isn’t quite what it means…. August 1, 2012 at 12:19 am #117367 pfmParticipant I heard he gives good head. August 1, 2012 at 3:56 am #117371 mickParticipant Took some trawling through my old photobucket account to find this gem: September 1, 2012 at 12:01 am #126307 Mr-StabbyParticipant For the first time in a long time i decided to listen to the commentaries on the Series 8 DVDs. I can’t believe i’ve never noticed how negative Norm is being in these commentaries. The thing is, a lot of the time he actually has a point with what he’s saying. Mainly with the whole ‘this used to be a sitcom, now it’s panto’ type stuff. Even sighing the occasional ‘Oh my god…’ at points in the shows when i was doing the exact same thing for it being stupid or crap in some way. But he’s just being pointlessly antagonistic towards the rest of the cast at various points. They occasionally bite back at him. I love it when Chris does his impression of Norm, then when Norm says his career as an impressionist is over, Chris says ‘Well maybe you should be more famous Norm then i’d be back in business’. Classic :D September 1, 2012 at 1:01 am #126308 JamesTCParticipant I wonder if Norm will be in the new series. September 1, 2012 at 2:37 am #126311 HelloMabelParticipant > I wonder if Norm will be in the new series. Yes. That memorable guest appearance everyone’s talking about? George Wendt. September 1, 2012 at 3:17 am #126315 JoParticipant Blimey, the publishing company REALLY likes quiz books! http://www.apexpublishing.co.uk/latestnews.aspx September 1, 2012 at 3:27 am #126316 HelloMabelParticipant 1. Norman Lovett’s favorite hobby is: A. Moaning B. Moaning about Red Dwarf C. Moaning about his ball being taken away September 1, 2012 at 1:35 pm #126324 RidleyParticipant I can’t believe i’ve never noticed how negative Norm is being in these commentaries. I believe it was Mr. Paddon who pointed out his disappointment – not in these words, mind – that the crotchety old man schtick doesn’t appear to be an act. September 1, 2012 at 3:36 pm #126329 mickParticipant I realised after seeing him have a mental rant at a barman in Peterborough, that he was in fact a massive cunt. September 1, 2012 at 4:43 pm #126333 Ben PaddonParticipant He’s like Larry David, but without all that natural charm. September 2, 2012 at 12:37 am #126347 Mr-StabbyParticipant I realised after seeing him have a mental rant at a barman in Peterborough, that he was in fact a massive cunt. What about??? Barman: Here’s your drink Mr Lovett Norm: Where’s my umbrella?! Give me my umbrella! If i don’t get my umbrella, you won’t get another line out of me! Barman: You’ve had one too many lines already! September 2, 2012 at 2:53 am #126351 PhilParticipant Norm walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Why the long face?” Norm spends 10 years slagging off the bartender personally, the bar itself, the town in which the bar is located, and everyone who’s ever enjoyed themselves at the bar, then moans about not be invited to the anniversary of its opening. September 2, 2012 at 7:33 am #126353 Pete Part ThreeParticipant Excellent. September 2, 2012 at 9:12 am #126355 Ben PaddonParticipant I nominate etc. March 7, 2013 at 6:10 pm #206589 PhilParticipant Hi, no its not going ahead. best regards Chris Cowlin Production & Publishing Manager Apex Publishing Ltd March 7, 2013 at 11:03 pm #206591 RidleyParticipant She said “I’ll take the tell-all.” And she took the tell-all and hid… And locked it away in a cupboard. March 8, 2013 at 3:09 am #206592 Sam JohnsonParticipant Clearly we’re not going to get another line out of Norm… March 9, 2013 at 10:29 pm #206622 peas_and_cornParticipant I guess they’re not interested in the audience Norman has. April 3, 2013 at 12:33 am #206886 Ian SymesKeymaster I had a good long chat with Norman tonight. He’s very much aware of this thread, and both its general and specific content. We each conceded that regrettable things had been said on both sides, and that (especially around Back To Earth) there was bad blood between Norman and Red Dwarf fans, and that this was a sad state of affairs. Norman and I shook hands, and we both expressed a desire to draw a line under things. He also mentioned that he’d taken a break from writing his autobiography, but is back on it now. And incidentally – he likes Series X! April 3, 2013 at 1:14 am #206889 PhilParticipant If it’s any consolation, there was no period during which I didn’t want to read this book. April 3, 2013 at 2:53 am #206890 JonsmadParticipant You had a photograph taken shaking Iain Lee’s hand. Now you are expressing desires to move on from anti-Norman sentiments on G & T. God fucking dam it Symes!!! Stop being so fucking mature. We are running out of obvious formulaic but of the joke shared gag references around here man! * sigh* ok ok. I’m onboard. Well done to you. And Well done to Norm. Bright new future. But if you ever, AND I MEAN EVER, have a nice little chat and photograph opportunity with Chloe’s vaginal entry, and agree that the future direction is that we all no longer discuss it’s frothable capabilities. Then I’m fucking out of here. April 3, 2013 at 3:21 am #206891 Danny StephensonKeymaster Thanks to Jonsmad, i’ve just discovered what might well be the most interesting word to say out loud in the English Language next to ‘egg’, ‘sponge’ and ‘pebble’: Frothable. Thanks for that. April 3, 2013 at 8:36 am #206892 RidleyParticipant Stop being so fucking mature. More like self-preservation while he continues to encroach on their professions. :p April 3, 2013 at 9:41 am #206893 Ian SymesKeymaster For the record, I’m not asking anyone to change their opinions on Norman, or to feel restricted into what they can or can’t post here. I explained to Norman the difference between G&T’s editorial comment and what the community says on the forum, and that we would never censor or moderate anyone’s opinions. All I’m saying is that I, personally, don’t want to be involved in any sort of feud, which you may remember I also said in one of our Series X Instant Reaction Dwarfcasts – around six months before I’d even considered doing standup, let alone found out that I’d be on the same bill as him! I think Norm has acted like a tit at times in the recent past, but I’m willing to forgive and forget. Same deal with Iain Lee – between us, we called an end to the aggression online about a year before that reconciliation photo was posted. April 3, 2013 at 10:38 am #206895 Pete Part ThreeParticipant I think he needs to do an interview about this (and G+T is the obvious place for it). I agree with a lot of his criticisms of recent Red Dwarf but don’t think he, as a former cast member, has acted very professionally in being so vocal about them. He *may* have been badly treated but I think he’s been very misguided in expecting fans to side with him over Grant Naylor, and I hope he realises that now. If Series VIII told us anything, it’s that RD fans are a forgiving bunch (Well, some of them. Well, one of them. Maybe) so if he put the record straight, it would probably do him a favour. The alternative is waiting for his autobiography, but I don’t know how many fans would buy that with the way things are currently. Author Posts Viewing 100 posts - 201 through 300 (of 318 total) 1 2 3 4 Scroll to top • Scroll to Recent Forum Posts You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Log In Username: Password: Keep me signed in Log In