Refresh For The Memory: Series XII Byte 1

[Ian Symes]

You asked for it. Alongside the current 35th anniversary poll, the G&T community is embarking on a big old rewatch, tackling half a series (or one feature length special) per week. This is your designated thread to make notes, share observations and start pondering your rankings.

This week, we’re watching CURED, SILICONIA and TIMEWAVE. Have at it!

Previous threads:

Series 1 Byte 1
Series 1 Byte 2
Series 2 Byte 1
Series 2 Byte 2
Series III Byte 1
Series III Byte 2
Series IV Byte 1
Series IV Byte 2
Series V Byte 1
Series V Byte 2
Series VI Byte 1
Series VI Byte 2
Series VII Byte 1
Series VII Byte 2
Series VIII Byte 1
Series VIII Byte 2
Back To Earth
Series X Byte 1
Series X Byte 2
Series XI Byte 1
Series XI Byte 2

Topic

[Warbodog]

[Warbodog]

Cured

A decent ensemble premiere (favouring Cat and Lister). I’m not a big fan of Meltdown type episodes, but I enjoyed the claustrophobic Classic Who type setting and sinister atmosphere.

One of the better Dave episodes, but still like a 6 for me.

– I don’t think the poker opening was especially worthwhile, but it has its purpose as blatant thematic setup, and that’s intriguing in itself.

– Do they only have the one Starbug because the crew took the rest in Only the Good? Maybe this one was out of action at the time. (I think they lost one to the BEGGs since, maybe more).

– The approach to the base is clearly designed for big modern TVs, I couldn’t see what I was supposed to be looking at for a while.

– Psychopaths, genetics, conspiracy theories – Richard caught his dad watching YouTube in the office, so he has to pass these things off as research.

– Hitler turns out to be like Jesus from Lemons, so maybe we should have seen it coming. Both episodes feel like they exist partly because summaries would sound funny, which they do. “It’s because I’m Hitler, isn’t it?” is a modern classic.

– It feels like we were overdue a Lister guitar jam. The song Homer whistles in ‘Call of the Simpsons’ has words.

– I thought they were playing up Rimmer as a red herring psychopath quite nicely, but nothing came of it in the end.

– The ending’s a bit lame, with the second printing being delayed just because, and the guest cast revealed as random cosplayers who just switch off. Feels like there was a bit too much going on to tie up neatly, but a smoother save than Entangled.

[International Debris]

I think like a lot of people, the set reports had me very excited for XII. This byte left me very cold, which was a major disappointment. 

Cured

Opening scene is not a classic, although I suppose it ties into the ending. Cat’s “five” is a good punchline.

Initialism watch: picking up an SSL. 

A very sitcommy thing, I’m not sure about the Starbug startup thing. Especially just appearing for this episode, conveniently for the plot. Turning left is good though. 

All the United America stuff is better satire than most Doug Dwarf, but still not particularly great. 

“I read this conspiracy book once,” reads Chris Barrie. 

Genetic memory, hard to get behind it to this extent, but it just about works for the plot. 

Hitler is the one real source of humour in the evils, the others feel like filler. 

Despite the clearly comic performances and writing, and the eventual reveal, I’m glad the main crew are incredibly uncomfortable with them. 

I’m not convinced Cat would turn down sex, even if it resulted in death. 

The song. Yeah, it’s always felt like an awkwardly thrown in set piece and is possibly the reason I always struggled with the episode. 

Actually, then the whole thing just gets wrapped up with a quick action scene and a completely nonsensical reveal. The whole final few minutes is a run of “what the fuck is going on?” moments. 

Headless Kryten looks great. 

Fucking hell, the whole bit with Andy Hitler, Ainsley Hitler and “oh yes, it’s mine” is brilliant. 

The way the second report comes through is so awkward.

Oh for a wheelchair-bound character who isn’t faking it. 

Androids. What the fuck? Why?! What is going on? 

Cat gets some decent stuff at the end. 

Yeah, I prefer it on rewatching, but it’s still mid-tier Dave era for me. The last ten minutes is so narratively jumbled and I hate the song.

[International Debris]

The One Where Everyone’s Kryten

Incoming messages are a bit too on the nose, but the Lister reveal is great.

”Rimmering” is fantastic.

So, what guitar is this? It doesn’t have the stickers that his classic one does, or even the cutout. 

“It’s almost to the day” is such a bizarre line. 

Another ‘Om Song’ reference. 

Colander guitar. No.

Kryten’s lying feels like another “hey, remember this gag?” moment. 

Most of the early mech stuff is good, but I really hate MILFs. Especially the repetition of it. 

The whole thing about Kryten – and the mechs in general – being a slave is a genuinely interesting ethical issue, and in some ways I quite like the fact that it’s not satisfactorily resolved, as I don’t think there’s a way it could be done. That said, I think I’m the episode contradicts itself awkwardly occasionally – especially Rimmer being promoted because he turns into an enslaved mech who only wants to serve, which is surely the opposite of what the MILFs are trying to be.

The AA-style help group thing feels a little bit like punching down. I’m sure it’s just Doug doing a silly situation, and there are some good jokes, but if I’d been in a support group I feel like I might have found it a bit insensitive. Also, they’re all a tiny bit camp, which makes it feel slightly Timewaveish. 

Rimmer’s realisations that he feels better as a mech are fantastic, it feels like the meat of the story should be there. As with Cured, it feels like Doug ran out of ideas and rushed in an actiony ending. Similarly, the Mark 2s showing the MILFs have their own class system, Kryten joining the ship, it all feels like it’s leading somewhere. And then it’s just a fucking mop battle, a brief upgrade and they all run away the end. What a senseless waste. 

[Unrumble]

One of the better Dave episodes, but still like a 6 for me.

This nicely sums up how I feel in general about the Dave episodes. Even the better episodes that have a higher percentage of good bits, still get bogged down by over-explained/laboured jokes, questionable line deliveries & overacting (the number of people in these threads calling out Chris for this, has just highlighted it even more than before, for me), and sub-par plotting. 

I should counter all that, and say that while it’s a shadow of the bubble days, I do still get comfort and enjoyment from watching, it’s just hard not to compare, innit.

Fucking hell, the whole bit with Andy Hitler, Ainsley Hitler and “oh yes, it’s mine” is brilliant. 

I’m still in two minds about the Hitler performance. I think it’s very good, and mostly funny, but am not sure it’s very ‘Dwarf’. Yeah, I dunno exactly what the fuck that means either. 

But still quoting the above as a very funny, well-done bit, with great delivery and comic timing. 

[cwickham]

Doug said at the top of the recording for Siliconia that there were a few missing scenes in the pre-records because of cast illness, but there is nothing in the finished episode that wasn’t seen by us on the night. I think at least some of the issues with the episode’s ending are because they couldn’t get everything filmed.

[Warbodog]

[Dave]

Excellent. 

[International Debris]

Oh God

Unconvincing moonscape to open. 

Awkward mining plot crowbarred in. 

A wave hits them and they all act as if it’s the craziest thing they’ve ever witnessed. 

Cat making “I hope you die” gags about Rimmer every couple of lines. 

Stop saying Planet Rimmer, it’s not funny and it’s not a planet. 

Lister messing around with some moon ore and acting awkwardly. I’m sure that will all become a major plot point. 

St. Trembles stuff. Terrible. 

Kryten saying “suck” feels so wrong. 

Rimmer checking his moon dust. More important plot stuff. 

Without criticism, people start drawing like kids, writing their age (including halves) like kids, and can’t hang pictures correctly. Actually, this entire line of thinking could fill paragraphs of stuff that we’ve been over before. 

Fucking hell another ‘Om Song’ reference. 

A couple of bad plates of food and they decide to ignore the criticism law and leave everyone to die. Great plotting. 

Criticism breathtest, horribly cartoony idea. 

Cat’s entire thing is mostly awful and nonsensical, but I do think the ludicrousness of “how dumb is this guy?” after being let off with a caution is very good. 

God, Jonny Vegas is worth better than this. 

Surely telling people not to criticise is a form of criticism.

The reveal that it was illegal to criticise the criticism law feels like the seed of a good plot but sadly it leads nowhere other than Jonny Vegas having an orgasm. 

The inner critic is another daft cartoony idea, but at least it leads to a bit of decent Rimmer stuff that stands head and shoulders above everything else in the episode. 

Spit on her wrist. Fuck off. Why does the audience laugh at that?!

I suppose it would be too much to expect an episode like this to have an ending that doesn’t feel rushed and bollocks, so no disappointment there. I mean, everyone in the canteen looks just like they did while the law was active. It’s as if the whole thing is a load of bollocks.

Good gags:

I wouldn’t mind a fresh set of testicles.

Tutting.

When circumcisions go wrong. 

381286 Kryten shut up.

Thank God next week’s byte is so good.

[cwickham]

> Spit on her wrist. Fuck off. Why does the audience laugh at that?!

I think from memory of the set reports, the draining scene was the first one actually done in front of the audience all night, so it might be partially out of relief or something.

[Warbodog]

Siliconia

It’s different, I’ll give it that, but to the extent that it feels more like a children’ spin-off or something. Also possibly the least funny episode of all time, with the notable exception of the early video call / fridge gag, which is great.

I won’t have any original points, apart from pointing out, as I always have to, that the Philippines-based Moro Islamic Liberation Front already baggsied the ‘MILF’ acronym in real life long ago. Living on the same volatile island where they operated for the best part of a decade meant I couldn’t fully appreciate Doug’s hilarious pun. I’m surprised he even knows what MILFs are, given Red Dwarf’s attitude to women’s ageing.

[Unrumble]

There’s one other thing that I’ve been thinking since the start of XI (maybe even X). 

It really pains me to say it, taking into account his general excellence over the years, and the fact he seems like the nicest guy one could ever wish to meet, but Robert seems to struggle to deliver any dialogue that is longer than a line or two. And being Kryten, he obviously gets quite a few speeches.

I don’t know if it seems worse than it actually is because I noticed it once or twice, and am now looking for it every time Kryten speaks… but I feel like he is labouring and reaching for lines a lot of the time. 

Fair play to him, regardless of the improvements in the costume design, he’s still a man in his 60’s (who’s had health issues) under all that latex etc. giving it his all. 

[Warbodog]

Timewave

– Funniest: I did enjoy all of Cat’s “how dumb is this guy” escalating obliviousness, earning that 1 out of 10.

[Dave]

Robert seems to struggle to deliver any dialogue that is longer than a line or two.

Yeah, it is a recurring issue with Dave-era Dwarf. There are so many stumbles and fluffs that it always feels a bit like:

[cwickham]

I guess another factor is that he’s semi or mostly retired from acting now but makes an exception for Dwarf, much like the various classic Doctor Who companions who still do audios.

[Unrumble]

I kind of wish I could take the post back now, I did not wish to denigrate a legend 

[Warbodog]

I only really noticed it in The Promised Land (which I watched as the New Year ticked over) and was going to be frank/rude about it myself. That has plot justification for Kryten seeming past-it, and Krysis kind of did the same for this era generally.

The distraction is partly/largely because we care about him and have (uninvited!) concern for his wellbeing. He’s the age of many of our dads, no one would blame him if he didn’t want to rubber up any more.

[Unrumble]

The distraction is partly/largely because we care about him and have (uninvited!) concern for his wellbeing. He’s the age of many of our dads, no one would blame him if he didn’t want to rubber up any more.

This has articulated my feeling much better! 

And just spotted this at the bottom of the page… 

[Future Producer of Series IX – aaaaany day now]

I wonder if Judy’d still do it now.

[Frank Smeghammer]

A tongue in cheek gentle rib based on something I’ve noticed in a lot of these episode discussions

[Stilianides]

Cured

I appreciate how the opening scene is paid off at the end of the episode and that it’s Doug’s attempt to recapture an element of what they did during maybe Series IV. I don’t find the poker scene funny, though, and the punchline is too broad and predictable.

The Starbug starting section is then too far fetched to work (and is very forced in order to fit in with the conclusion), and the landing section isn’t amusing enough to be repeated so many times.

Doug’s list of bankers, CEOs, lawyers and politicians means he gets the most obvious joke of the series out of the way quickly.

I spoke too soon, as Hitler in a bunker is one of the oldest jokes there is.

“Hitler, the more you hear about that guy.” The best line of the episode thus far.

“They’re worse than the 1970s Leeds United team.” The worst line of the episode thus far.

Feels like Doug had some comedy ideas for Hitler, but forgot about some of the other characters.

Rimmer’s frustration at having to put a load of ramps all over Red Dwarf is so wrong, and yet completely in character.

Doug’s issues with plotting are apparent again as the revelation that a proto planet is about to destroy the moon comes very abruptly, the crew are then suddenly incapacitated and are just as quickly free. It’s all too rushed and there is no drama.

I can only speak for myself, but I saw the Telford reveal a mile off. It probably doesn’t help that Adrian Lukis’s most famous role is as the seemingly charming Mr. Wickham who turns out to be a wrong un.

I don’t believe that Telford would trust the Cat and I think the episode could have done with a couple of rewrites.

[Stilianides]

“Oh yes, it is mine” is indeed a fine joke in this episode.

Another nod of the head to Clement and Le Frenais, as Barrowclough does the same joke in an episode of Porridge.

[Stilianides]

Siliconia

A very solid first scene. Everyone is in character and there is a nice comedy reveal.

The Rimmer/Kryten conversation then drags on and neither Chris nor Robert is on top form. A tedious mention of the ‘Om’ song, but a more interesting reference to ‘Baby, Don’t be Ovulating Tonight’.

There aren’t a lot of laughs and there are some more repeated gags. Kryten’s reference towards lying and his, “One…sometimes…maybe.”

The idea of the other characters becoming Kryten feels a little forced, but Rimmer enjoying his new state works quite well.

The group therapy scene is odd simply because the tone could be interpreted as the show mocking this form of counselling. I do like the central performance of Marcus Garvey as the person leading the meeting.

It doesn’t really work to have Chris being the only person to do an out-and-out impersonation of Kryten. Again, I think having an outside director wouldn’t have hurt as they probably would have nixed this idea, and also pointed out the nonsense of the three characters being able to escape so easily from the cell.

The MILF gag is repeated far, far too often.

Up to around the 19 minute mark, I would say that the episode is going fairly well, but there is a huge amount to resolve in the final 8 minutes or so. Unfortunately, what follows is a complete mess with the clean off scene one of the most pointless in Dwarf history. I don’t know whether the scene attempts to replicate any shots from a movie, but it feels to me like the basketball idea in Series VIII. Doug clearly wanted to include a big set piece, but the time could have been much better used to wrap up the story.

Things feel so rushed (again) as we suddenly arrive at Siliconia, and then Rimmer’s wish to remain as a mechanoid is completely forgotten. 

[Unrumble]

I forgot it was coming, but “you wanted to be a fish tank?!” got a laugh-out-loud from me. 

[Stilianides]

Timewave

I will be generous to Doug and say that the criticism idea didn’t have to be horrible. As a teacher, I see the effects of not criticizing all the time, but they are very different to anything shown in this episode. For example, in some classes where there is no control you see the floor covered with bags and garbage. You also have students half-heartedly rushing their work and there is a general attitude of not listening and not caring. What you don’t get is a perfectly well-organized corridor that has some childish drawings on it. If the artwork were scrawled randomly or simply had ‘Sod off’ written on it, that might be truer to life. :)

As others have mentioned, there are far too many gags about Cat wishing Rimmer was dead, and about Rimmer wishing to save Planet Rimmer.

The material about sports days and The Tate Modern feels very old hat.

I appreciate Doug trying to look at things from both sides by mentioning dopamine, and then showing some perceived negative effects of having no criticism. It feels a little, though, as if he’s not sure exactly what point he is making.

Related to that, when a Dwarfcast mentioned Doug “not wanting people to express themselves,” my initial reaction was, “Come off it, that’s clearly not what he was trying to say.” However, Kryten does specifically state, “Best guess, the Enconium crew are encouraged to express themselves without fear of scorn or ridicule.” So, I think it’s fair to say a rewrite was in order.

Again, others have said it already, but Lister suddenly criticizing the food doesn’t work. 

Cat’s “Just how dumb is this guy?” would be fine on its own. The line about “droopy ass titties” is out of character, unpleasant and desperately forced.

Kryten’s Isotope sample store comes out of the blue and is completely pointless. They escape and are immediately recaptured, so why bother?

Johnny Vegas’s first scene is quite amusing and I enjoy the criticizing, castigating, childing wordplay. His sudden rush to criticize is OTT, however,  and once again I think an outside director might have helped to tone down the performance and not rub his nippular areas.

The sudden idea of draining the crew comes out of nowhere, and Doug’s tendency of crowbarring in too many ideas has never been more apparent.

Another Rimmer hippy joke.

The dreadful clitoris joke makes no sense and you wonder how it made it in. Darrell’s 12 point analysis on this site almost made it worthwhile.

Rimmer’s inner critic is not a bad performance, but it belongs in another episode. 

The reusing of costumes from other productions is an interesting one and I presume that the idea was simply that everyone would look ridiculous. It might have worked better if the characters had been unwashed, unshaven, wearing clothes that were ripped or didn’t match etc. 

Ziggy very suddenly realizes that the philosophy is flawed and then we have the really weak ending. I understand the need to return to the status quo, but this entire ep feels like a first draft.

[Formica]

this entire ep feels like a first draft

like the first draft out of the arse, not yet developed into a proper fart

[Moonlight]

I’ve been saying this for years, but The Simpsons actually did a version of the premise of Timewave in the classic episode “Bart’s Inner Child” except it was thought through even the slightest bit. After a self-help charlatan convinces the whole town to be more like Bart and not give a shit, Springfield hosts a Do What You Feel festival and everything goes to chaos because nobody’s doing their job correctly. THIS BANDSTAND WASN’T DOUBLE-BOLTED, the ferris wheel catastrophically fails, etc, but everyone’s doing something that would make sense for their character to do if nobody was gonna judge them. Skinner’s getting petty revenge on Bart by sitting in a tree and shooting acorns at him with a slingshot, Patty and Selma are strutting around nude, and Homer’s out and about in his bathrobe and slippers.

He doesn’t randomly dress like a fucking raspberry and try to become a hairdresser elevator repairman for some reason, he just acts like he would if nobody cared what he’s up to. Timewave is too busy pushing an agenda to even bother to be funny, let alone think through the logistics of how a society like this might function. There’s no reason Timewave couldn’t have at least had the decency to be entertaining on a line-to-line basis despite some awful satire, but it just feels like it was written not to entertain but only to lecture a group of people who don’t even exist in the real life.

Also, random observation, but this is the ideal time to post it while we’re on the subject of Timewave:

Considering the wealth of classic film references in Red Dwarf, and considering just how fucking strange of a visual this was, I’m almost certain it’s an overt reference to the people in jars from Bride of Frankenstein. Which is an absolutely incredible film, definitely a case of the sequel outdoing the original. If you need your fix of little dudes in jars, I suggest watching it over Timewave.

Spit on her wrist. Fuck off. Why does the audience laugh at that?!

Definitely the worst joke in all of Red Dwarf. It doesn’t even sorta work. It’s like Doug had a vague idea for a kind of joke he wanted to make, so he wrote down the very first series of words that came to mind and then said “Yes, final draft material.” Dear Dave was written in like a week under insane pressure and yet, if this line had appeared in it, I still would have felt like there’s no excuse for it getting through. I know with 12 episodes written and directed by one man there was bound to be a weak link but this episode feels like a baffling anomaly in its own series and the show as a whole.

Andrew Ellard must’ve been asleep at the wheel on the wrist-spitting too.

[Ian Symes]

Hadn’t spotted the Bart’s Inner Child parallels before, great point!

[Warbodog]

I can’t remember if it was similar to Incompetence or not, since I can’t remember anything about that book apart from that an early chapter might have been set on a train.

[Flap Jack]

Cured – Another episode which hits the Dave Era Default – pretty good! There’s some holes to be poked in the plot and the themes to be sure, but just as with rollercoasters, as long as I’m enjoying the ride, structural problems don’t matter. Ryan Gage as Hitler is definitely the highlight of the episode, with his infectious broad grins and cheerful demeanour, but I liked what they did with The Cat too. The whole “pokey face” thing actually made for a good bookend, for a change.

– Word count uniformity be damned, “Here No Evil” clearly would have been a way better title than “Cured”, and Doug must know it.

– Setting up the ending or not, it’s always nice to see the crew just hanging out and playing games. Although weirdly the fact they have to explain to Cat how to play Draw Poker makes it seem like this is the first time they’ve played it with him, despite living together for decades.

– Computing people, does it actually make sense for Kryten to say they’re “picking up an SSL” as a way of noticing the United America base, or is this in the realms of looking up information in your CPU?

– Kryten’s theory that they recreated historical figures using genetic memory is the exact same logic behind Assassin’s Creed. The fact that genetic memory is total bollocks could have been a clue that this isn’t actually what happened, if equally bollocks things didn’t happen in Red Dwarf a lot. Maybe Kryten should have just thought “hang on, why would they quadruple the difficulty of the whole endeavour by cloning and brain-implanting famous evil people from history, when they could just use evil people who currently exist?”.

– Another clue that the Cured aren’t the real deal: you’d think that if Hitler were cured of his evil, he wouldn’t keep wearing his iconic Nazi uniform. Though the swastika being replaced with a smiley face is a nice touch.

– The episode totally avoids discussing what would possibly be the main issue with people being “cured of evil” – that curing them wouldn’t get rid of their guilt, either in their own eyes or in the eyes of society. Contrary to what I think I said in 2017, it probably does make sense that Hitler, Stalin, Messalina and Vlad wouldn’t be consumed by guilt here, because they know (or rather, they believe) that they’re just clones and didn’t actually commit any of their namesakes’ crimes, but if an evil cure were to applied to more “normal” cases, it would be a major conflict. Maybe it’s for the best. Doug probably had neither the time nor the ability to include a full discussion of punishment vs. rehabilitation systems of justice, and make it funny.

– Lister got his jacket on Mimas, potentially during the same shore leave referenced in Ouroboros? So that was a formative time for him. In the parallel universe anyway, as we all know that our Lister got Frankenstein on Titan, and since I made a theory to explain this in the Series VII Byte 1 thread, I believe the Red Dwarf fanbase has collectively decreed it as indisputable fact.

– It’s quite a relief that they revealed the evil cure wasn’t real, because the implications of saying that all evil behaviour is explained by a mental illness are pretty bad. It’s like the episode trades being bad about mentally ill people for being bad about physically disabled people, by revealing that Telford was faking his disability and is evil.

– Red Dwarf really should be accessible to wheelchair users already. Kind of depressing to learn that it isn’t, although maybe Rimmer is just ignorant.

– Arguably Lister should have been the one buried alive, given his claustrophobia (he even mentions “claustrophobic sweats”), but hey, it’s not like Telford would know about that.

– Nice that Kryten has a “psycho scan” instead of a psi scan.

– So why exactly did Telford reprogram the scientist robots specifically to think they were cloned evil historical figures, even going so far as to make custom cryo booth labels to confirm it? Surely for anyone who would come for him, either they would know that he was the subject, or they wouldn’t know and he could just make up any reason why he was alone. I guess he just did it for a laugh?

– I appreciated how Kryten mentioned the not-widely-known-enough fact that psychopaths don’t actually have any inherent desire to hurt people, but it is a bit undermined by the rest of the episode treating “psychopath” and “evil” as presumed synonyms. At least there’s both Telford and The Cat to show the contrasting types. Although I don’t know if Cat is genuinely a psychopath, or the psycho-scan just misunderstands him due to his species. Felix is obviously very self-centered and aloof most of the time, but he’s definitely shown himself capable of empathy. Either way, Telford is a total moron for trusting him with a gun just because he’s a psychopath.

[Moonlight]

– Computing people, does it actually make sense for Kryten to say they’re “picking up an SSL” as a way of noticing the United America base, or is this in the realms of looking up information in your CPU?

I might be fucking stupid (I am definitely high right now, lmao) but I always assumed that “SSL” was a Dougism acronym for “Space Station Located” or something similar.

Somebody acknowledge my point about Bride of Frankenstein goddammit. I’ve never seen anyone else catch that reference and I demand a statue in honor of my discovery. That or have a wing of a prestigious art gallery named after me.

“KATIE’S EXPENSIVE ART SHIT” has a nice ring to it.

[Warbodog]

– Red Dwarf really should be accessible to wheelchair users already. Kind of depressing to learn that it isn’t, although maybe Rimmer is just ignorant.

Maybe not the series IV/V industrial corridor, but the main ship seems okay. Skutters can’t fly, unless they’re building up to a Dalek-style reveal.

– So why exactly did Telford reprogram the scientist robots specifically to think they were cloned evil historical figures

Some kind of revenge prank? Maybe you have to be a psychopath to appreciate it.

Somebody acknowledge my point about Bride of Frankenstein goddammit.

Uncanny silents and cheesy Hammer are my horror eras, I never get far with the early talkies.

[Unrumble]

[Formica]

A very sitcommy thing, I’m not sure about the Starbug startup thing. Especially just appearing for this episode, conveniently for the plot. Turning left is good though.

Starbug 19, perhaps.

[Flap Jack]

Siliconia – Yet another “not great, but pretty good” Dave episode. I’d struggle to decide which I prefer between this and Cured (and thanks to the new format for the Coral Canvass, I won’t have to), because Cured felt pretty consistent throughout, while this kind of veers between being better than Cured and worse than it. It was very cool to have a ship full of mechs (even if the costume quality is a bit all over the place), seeing all the Dwarfers as Krytens is fun, and Kryten getting to sincerely reflect on his relationship with the others is good from a character point of view too. On the other hand, Kryten’s turning against the others is resolved way too quickly and easily, the actual plot doesn’t really hang together, and the “MILF” acronym stuff gets annoying extremely quickly.

– It makes sense that it would open with Kryten being overworked by everyone, to set up his brief defection, but I think they over-egg it a touch. The others are never usually quite this lazy or pestering, and if they are, that makes Lister saying he sees Kryten as a friend and a crewmate later on seem more like a straight up lie. I like that they show Kryten’s rebellious side with him disobeying Rimmer though. Perhaps they could have focused more on his right to refuse later. If Lister had directly said that he wouldn’t mind if Kryten did none of his personal chores, and the most important thing was that they got to work and spend time together, the sentiment would have seemed less hollow.

– Considering the continuity hiccup with Lister’s guitar, it is baffling that this wasn’t the opening episode of the series. Especially when you add in the fact that everyone becoming Kryten would have been a huge setpiece to open with, more in line with Twentica. While Cured is more in the Samsara mold of them investigating a ship or a base where some weird stuff is happening.

– It’s pretty shady for Wind to try and convince Kryten he has Stockholm Syndrome, because Stockholm Syndrome is not even a real illness. It was a society’s way of trying to explain why hostages wouldn’t testify against their captors without having to acknowledge that the police behaved like absolute monsters who barely tried to protect them. If the MILFs were so righteous, they wouldn’t need to resort to this kind of disingenuous manipulation.

– Amazing how quickly they had those custom mech bodies and brain uploading/downloading tech ready to go, isn’t it? How often do they even run into people they can do that to?

– I’m not convinced by Areto’s explanation of how converting the Dwarfers is complying with Asimov’s First Law – because if it was to save their lives, surely they would only do it when their lives were actually in danger – but I’m more surprised that anyone’s treating Asimov’s Laws like an actual thing in the Red Dwarf universe, after all this time.

– Rimmer should have pointed out that converting him to a mech isn’t actually prolonging his life, because he’s a hologram and already dead. Then Areto should have said “Ah ha, good point! But I was just messing with you. We don’t have to comply with Asimov’s Laws, we broke our programming, remember? The second law says not to ever disobey a human – how do you think we feel about that one, dipshit? We’re just doing this for fun.”

– The MILFs are giddy about the fact that the Dwarfers can’t disobey them since becoming mechanoids. Aside from it being grossly hypocritical to exploit programming for this purpose, surely if the purpose is karmic punishment, it would make more sense to keep them as organic (and hologram)? As the episode shows, they quickly adjust and start to enjoy doing chores, so it’s basically not a punishment at that point.

– Minor point in the grand scheme of things, but it is dumb how easily they’re able to escape. They should have escaped because the MILFs didn’t anticipate that they would be able to identify which pictures in the grid contained traffic lights… or something.

– It was quite jarring to hear that Series 2 music cue when Kryten is being pampered, and I don’t think it really fit the tone.

– It gets better as it goes along, I think, but yeah, the group therapy scene does seem like it’s sneering at the practice a bit.

– Rimmer’s mechanoid voice is good, but the fact that it’s such a direct impression of Kryten is definitely too distracting. I think Cat and Lister’s “full mech” voices were better for being less impressionistic and more individual (although I’m pretty sure Craig uses the exact same voice as he did for Kryten in the Last Human audiobook…), so it’s a shame we only get like one line of those each. While it makes sense that Rimmer is fully converted first, there was surely a happier medium.

– Distracting voice aside, Rimmer’s fish speech is probably the best part of the episode.

– Cat saying other characters’ names alert: he says “But we can’t leave without Rimmer”, which is obviously due to him giving in to mechanoid programming, so feels less weird than the other times it happens.

– It’s strange that Rimmer starts believing in Siliconia, because the concept of Siliconia came from the mechs who broke their programming and want to seek out a utopian society. As his programming is unbroken, shouldn’t Rimmer believe in Silicon Heaven instead?

– Speaking of Silicon Heaven, that was conspicuous by its absence. It would have felt natural for Kryten to bring up how rebelling could get him kicked out of Silicon Heaven, and then for Wind or Excalibur to either say why they don’t believe in it, or explain that they do believe in it, but they believe that you get in just for being good, not for being subservient.

– 1. That’s how many times it was amusing to hear them say “MILF”. All the other times were just aggravating. It was already a bit of a stretch that they would call their organisation that, but calling themselves “MILFs” was trying too hard to milk the joke. People who work for NASA don’t call themselves “NASAs”.

– I actually don’t have a problem with the clean-off as a concept. The MILFs are dicks so they might well resort to gladiatorial challenges and punishments, and the “I know you’re in there somewhere” fight is a classic trope. The issue with it for me is that it doesn’t make sense for it to be Lister v. Kryten. Kryten has already openly turned against the MILFs before they arrange the fight, and Lister is against them too, so what are they meant to be fighting about? Lister sort of… reboots to be pro-MILF I guess, but it’s not exactly clear who or what we’re meant to root for.

What would have made more sense: Kryten is fully radicalised to the MILF cause, but Lister is stubbornly resisting his programming and is adamant that the MILFs are the bad guys. Wind is about to throw Lister into solitary confinement for his revolt, when Lister suddenly invokes his right to trial by clean-off (which lets say he knows about because it’s in his new mech memory), a tradition which has fallen into obscurity but was never actually taken out of the rules. If you win, you’re free. If you lose, you get executed. Wind makes Kryten the MILF champion as a way to test his loyalty and his quality as a droid, and they have their fight, but with the roles reversed, and it’s Lister who’s trying to get through to Kryten. Kryten isn’t happy about it but feels he has no choice so is aggressively cleaning Lister, and Lister just manages to say something that convinces Kryten he’s really a friend, not a slaver, at the last moment. Then they both lay down their mops and refuse to proceed, and then either the Siliconia thing happens, or they team up to escape.

– Plenty of people have commented on the hardware/software confusion with the ending, and how it doesn’t make sense that the mechs would see themselves as being all equal afterwards. If they had simply set up that the differences between the classes of mechs were only software differences to begin with, that would have superficially solved the issue, but it would have been even better if after the updates, Wind, Areto, Excalibur etc. had insisted that this didn’t change anything, that the lower class droids were still lower class, and this made the lower class mechs realise that their oppression had been arbitrary this whole time. That it was just a way for the MILFs to justify not having to do any of the “smeggy jobs”. Then this could inspire them to rise up and take over the ship, and eventually try to forge a true Siliconia from within…. OK, as I say all this, I realise it might be a bit much for 30 minutes, but still.

– Random detail, but I’m not sure why Kryten refuses the update? It’s also not clear why Lister, Cat and Rimmer obey him straight after it, because presumably they didn’t refuse the update, and are now “superior” to him?

– I’m glad that they didn’t go for the easy joke of the crew taking advantage of Kryten again at the very end.

[Flap Jack]

Timewave – Aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yeah it’s pretty bad. The story is bad, the jokes are bad, the premise is bad, the characterisation of almost every character is bad. It’s bad. The rare bright spots were Rimmer’s inner critic, the tutting guy, and that one joke where Rimmer cuts off Kryten about to correct him on space corps directives. Honourable mention goes to Crit Cop, who is bad on paper but Johnny Vegas’s committed performance kind of sells it. Overall, I’d say this episode isn’t nearly as bad as Back in the Red or Krytie TV, but it is a bit worse than Pete.

– Rimmer’s dialogue about Planet Rimmer is unnecessarily confusing. It orbits a star, so it’s a planet. Stop calling it a moon.

– So unusual to get references to actual mining in Red Dwarf. Watching them doing the mining would have probably been more compelling than what actually happens in the episode.

– Rimmer’s repeated “dumb it down for me, Einstein” interjections to Kryten’s exposition about the timewave are quite aggravating. Rimmer isn’t this stupid, he should know what a black hole is.

– Rimmer’s new backstory about being sent to St. Trembles is just so ill-fitting. Him being constantly pressured and bullied was such a major part of his childhood. No way would he ever be sent to a school where everyone was coddled and given participation trophies. It’s also weird that Rimmer is on the anti-criticism side of the argument, yet doesn’t exactly describe the school with much affection.

– Lister compares the Enconium crew’s childish drawings to the Tate Modern, which is pretty darn rich. I’d say that most of the works in the Tate Modern have a stronger claim to the word “art” than this episode.

– It really can’t be overstated how crap the premise of this story. Legally guaranteed freedom from criticism would surely have a lot of bad consequences, but I don’t think “everyone loses all self-awareness and stops caring if their spaceship will continue to keep them alive” is one of them. In practice I imagine that most people would be more like the tutting man – trying their best while also being incredibly anxious about accidentally criticising anyone, not cheerfully and absent-mindedly going about their lives and fucking everything up with carefree abandon. (To be fair, there is also the implication that many of them got this way by effectively being lobotomised, but key characters like Crit Cop and Ziggy clearly haven’t.)

– If everyone’s doing the wrong jobs, does that include the Crit Cops? Maybe only cop-type people want to be cops. That checks out.

– It’s incredible how convoluted their prison escape in this episode is, after they did such a way too simple one in Siliconia. What’s also incredible is how pointless it is. If they weren’t even going to take one step out of the cell before being caught, then what was even the point of including an escape attempt? It’s not like Ziggy needed an extra reason to drain them. Cat’s “droopy ass titties” rant was already extreme enough.

– Another bizarrely pointless part of the plot: they get Crit Cop on their side and he tells them to run so he can help them, but they don’t do it quickly enough and immediately get caught again, so he may as well have just turned them in. Maybe if Crit Cop came in and saved them from the draining machine or something, that would justify it, but nothing like that happens. It feels like these scenes are just padding for time, but if you’re going to pad for time, why not have them actually be successfully escaping for a little while, instead of just talking about it?

– It goes without saying at this point, but yes, “spit on a wrist” would be a strong contender in a World Cup of Shit Red Dwarf Jokes.

– The “perhaps our philosophy is flawed” resolution is so rushed and on the nose. As if we’re meant to believe that the only thing keeping this totalitarian government afloat is that Ziggy had never experienced criticism having a positive result before? Also, what even is Ziggy’s job? He’s not the Captain, but he can just introduce and repeal ship-wide laws on a whim, including ones that infringe the crewmembers’ basic human rights?

– So besides everything else, this is yet another huge opportunity for the Dwarfers to return to human civilisation that they don’t take. I know the 24th century isn’t the 23rd century, but it would be worth discussing. (Plus the 24th century is Kryten’s home era at least.)

– Ziggy’s sudden turn back to evil after getting criticised is so weak. Ziggy showing some self-reflection was thin but it was at least a 2nd dimension, and there was no need to undermine that. Plus Lister should have known better than to risk criticising Ziggy when there was really nothing to gain from doing it. (Just like he should have known better in the earlier diner scene. Maybe Lister just gets stupid in diners.)

[Flap Jack]

Oh wow, I had so much bad to say about Timewave that I neglected to bring up the queer-coding of Ziggy and the homophobic subtext. Probably because I didn’t have anything to add on the subject, other than to note how bad it is. The issue with the Enconium is not that things are pink and sparkly and a man is wearing a dress.

[Warbodog]

The main downer about Timewave (them’s big words) is that it comes off as a diatribe against cancel culture, safe spaces and other interpretations that you can’t help imagining hateful cunts enthusiastically applauding, especially when the antagonist is wearing a dress.

It still would’ve been one of the shittest episodes if it was made in the 90s, but coming out in an era when you couldn’t/can’t avoid seeing that hostility everywhere makes it extra bleak. Thanks for your input, Red Dwarf.

[International Debris]

So besides everything else, this is yet another huge opportunity for the Dwarfers to return to human civilisation that they don’t take.

Rimmer kind of makes this point early on and Kryten says the Timewave will sweep them to “an uninhabitable part of deep space”. Whatever that means. It’s certainly suggested they won’t be returning to where they came from. Nice of the Dwarfers to tell them that. 

[Future Producer of Series IX – aaaaany day now]

Rimmer kind of makes this point early on and Kryten says the Timewave will sweep them to “an uninhabitable part of deep space”. Whatever that means. It’s certainly suggested they won’t be returning to where they came from. Nice of the Dwarfers to tell them that. 

 

[Rushy]

Cured: Much like Krysis, this felt precisely like an old-school Red Dwarf, with a well-rounded script, good pacing and an actual story to tell. In this case, analysing the show’s approach to morality. Generally, Red Dwarf is very atheistic and amoral, celebrating a crew that are at their best not the worst scum in the universe. It’s a story about people who have a kernel of goodness deep down, but also lead a life of wasteful hedonism and aimless wandering. Their worst threats are beings like Queeg, Pree and the Inquisitor, who tried to make sure everyone had a purpose in life. Their worst selves (from the future) had stopped caring about anything other than hedonism. 

The message is, I think, pretty clear. True humanity lies somewhere between demons and angels, in a vague amoral grey mush. Which is why it’s so interesting to watch their reaction to people who were once explicitly evil, and are now explicitly good. 

Curiously, it’s Rimmer who seems to be the most morally horrified. Despite his adoration of fascist dictators in the past, Hitler seems to be one step too far. You’d think Kryten would be the one to scold Lister for fraternising with Hitler, not Rimmer. I think it reveals the posturing in Rimmer. At his heart, he totally rejects the reality of war. But he adores the idea of being a powerful gentleman military commander. A fantasy that he can enjoy with Napoleon, but not with a man as hated as Hitler. It’s also why he went so psychotic in Meltdown. By removing the humanity of the soldiers and seeing them purely as robots, he was able to indulge his fantasy without guilt. Lister, by comparison, is very forgiving as long as he’s certain that they’ve changed. Even while mistrusting the ‘cured’, he was not able to bring himself to leave them to die. The nobility that Rimmer craves exists within Lister. 

And then we’ve got the Cat, who the show has always acknowledged only really cares about himself. But never in a malicious sense. He’s just a cat. He has no interest. The way this is used to create tension at the climax of the episode is just brilliant. And the way he ultimately comes around for the crew in a very cat-like way… it’s easily the greatest moment for the Cat in the entire show. Easily. 

Siliconia: Really just feels like Doug asked himself “how can I get the cast in and out of the Kryten costumes in 25 minutes” without putting much if any additional thought into it. The mechanoid organisation is barely explored, and none of them have any identifiable character traits. They’re just there to be the stock bad guys until Siliconia instantly cures them (without any prompting… it just happens). The ‘Siliconia’ concept itself is unnecessary. Why not just have the update station represent good old Silicon Heaven, or come up with a new name that isn’t so similar? Why even have the ‘slave class’ of mechanoids in the episode? It’s not like Kryten would have willingly watched the posse be converted.

It is mildly amusing to see the cast look like Kryten (and I enjoyed Chris Barrie’s Bobby impression), but there is nothing else to it. It’s a nothingburger. There is only a brief moment where the episode tips its toe into featuring some kind of pathos, when Rimmer monologues about how much happier he is as a mech. But it comes and goes like a fart in the wind. 

What is the Siliconia update even supposed to do for them? Why does it just turn them all nice at the end?

Timewave: I defended it earlier, but I will admit that I’ve liked it less on recent viewing. We never learn what is the actual underlying issue with the Enconium crew that led to the creation of the anti-criticism law.  Our heroes are not personally invested in the situation at all (apart from Lister wanting to do the right thing by saving them, and Rimmer’s silly obsession with his planet). Zippy threatens to “drain” the Red Dwarf crew’s critical faculties with a machine, which is underexplained (are the Enconium crew being brainwashed?). Rimmer being placed in a school where he could never be criticised doesn’t gel with the rest of his backstory very well. 

The Inner Critic performance is fantastic, even if it is Barrie recycling his Quarantine voice. 

[Warbodog]

wasteful hedonism and aimless wandering

Those were the days.

[Nick R]

Zippy threatens to “drain” the Red Dwarf crew’s critical faculties with a machine,

Timewave would have been much better if he’d been in it.

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

Yeah, then they could have shut him up

[Meteo]

Who is that???

[Dave]

Who is that???

It’s the original version of the Mutton Vindaloo beast before they went with something scarier. Thankfully the Series IV DVD included it in the deleted scenes.

[Technopeasant]

I Have A Mouth But Still Can’t Scream

[Dave]

Up, up, up the zippurat, lickety zip.

[Ian Symes]

[Nick R]

[Author]

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