Only The Good Is Alright

[Ben Saunders]

…but in the mirror universe, does Rimmer have an enormous cock, or a fanny? When I was young I assumed it was a fanny, but now I’m older I’m thinking enormous cock.

Topic

[Dollar Pound]

yes, goodall’s cheeks, butt cheeks

[Ben Saunders]

Holly should open an episode with a “what’s the deal with JMC standard issue food?”-style standup bit like on Seinfeld

[Dollar Pound]

it could be the old meta ‘let’s make a sitcom’ trope. seinfield did that and also rosanne

[Me Own Stunts]

The *only* good thing to come out of ‘Only The Good’ is Mac McDonald’s joke in the series VIII documentary that he could play the violin with his left hand in the mirror universe, because that is the opposite of not being able to play the violin.

[bloodteller]

that was a joke? i thought he just miraculously learned how to play violin during the filming of VIII

[Rubber]

also what rubber said about casualty style titles… do the last day and beyond a joke count? or is it strictly half a saying? if so i’m having ‘a bird in the hand: part etc’ for pete. i’m surprised the writers’ room haven’t caught onto this one already

——-

Can be a full saying but it usually isn’t. ‘Stoke Me A Clipper’ was the worst. It’s not a real saying in the first place, even before Rimmer FUCKS IT UP.

[Plastic Percy]

I still think they should have gone with Natural Born Rimmers.

[Rubber]

Still too derivative of something completely unrelated. Series VII should have been:

1. Curry Death Loop
2. Hero Destiny Loop
3. Ouroboros
4. Duct Slog
5. Gay Kiss
6. Robot Tank Fury
7. Epideme
8. Nanarchy

[Rubber]

1. Resurrection
2. Sexual Magnetism Virus
3. Plasticine
4. Cassandra
5. Revenge Porn
6. Boing!
7. Dino Shit
8. Don’t Bother

[Rubber]

I mean these do both sound like more interesting series now.

[bloodteller]

1. Rimmer Takes Drugs
2. Rimmer Fucks Everyone
3. Prison Rape
4. Sexual Frustration
5. Ogling The Naked
6. Mass Erections
7. Just One Erection
8. Incest

[Rubber]

1. Kochanski Gets Ratarsed
2. Kochanski Disguises Herself As A Black Person
3. Kochanski Is Stopped From Making A Fool Of Herself Sexually By Men
4. Kochanski Is Put Under Quite A Lot Of Pressure To Put Out
5. Kochanski Has A Tit And A Second Tit On A Big Screen
6. Kochanski Wants A Boob Job Like All Women
7. Kochanski Contributes Nothing
8. Kochanski Has A Menstrual Cycle And Her Bleeding Advances The Plot

[Ben Saunders]

1) The cat flies a spaceship
2) The cat ????
3) The cat dresses as a nurse
4) ???
5) ???
6) The cat gets raped or something
7) Idk
8) Danny John Jules says a big word

[Dave]

1. There’s a problem with Red Dwarf and it has a full crew.

2. Lister and Rimmer get caught out when they realise that things they thought were really happening to them haven’t really happened.

3. Rimmer and Lister try to outwit each other in a story that seems like it ‘s going to end with an important development but ultimately just spins its wheels and doesn’t really go anywhere.

…

4. Waiting for God

5. Confidence and Paranoia

6. Me2

Aaaahhhhhhhh

[Ben Saunders]

4. Some old cunt dies when Lister whips out his enormous sausage
5. A Scottish man plays a loud annoying American. Honestly not that good
6. Rimmer shouts at himself and then dies again.

Was it ever specifically mentioned that Lister lied about getting promoted or is it just ignored forever? I think it’s the latter

[Dave]

Apart from by Holly, you mean?

[si]

This thread has taken a strange turn.

[Ben Saunders]

Oh is the opening for the next episode not just a recap of Balance of Power lmao, forgot that

[flanl3]

Part 1. Rimmer nearly kills his three crewmates
Part 2. Rimmer kills a hologram
Part 3. It is explained to Rimmer by Kryten that he, in fact, did not just kill an entire universe full of people.

[flanl3]

1. Science Affair
2. Fuck For Your Lives!
3. Here, Have My Hole
4. A Massive Tug Gone Wrong
5. Kryten Screeches to Make Himself Feel Cool
6. Octoinfanticide: Pipe Me!: Polymorph III

[flanl3]

1. The One Where Everybody Becomes a Sperm (TOWEBS)
2. Rimmer and Lister Discuss Having Sex While Eating Dog Food
3. Kryten Finally Gets Lister’s Pants Off
4. Rimmer and Lister Touch Each Other’s Dicks Without Consent
5. Supermodels Will Fuck You Because You Are Rich
6. I Mean, What Do You Think an Insane Guy Who Likes Being In Control Of You and Could Kill You If You Didn’t Comply and Loves Showing Off His Massive Powerful Dick Is Going To Do Once He Has Taken Over the Entire Ship?

[Moonlight]

1. Ovationtopia
2. Fathers and Fucking
3. Lister Forces Himself on Rimmer Without Consent
4. Naked Ass
5. Catch Those Genitals!
6. Masturbation2

[Moonlight]

1. Lister Pretends to Be a Doctor in an Attempt to Molest a Stranger
2. Please Put the Mask Back On
3. The Non-Shitty Prison Episode
4. Blonde Women Are Stupid
5. The One With a Shit Ending (TOWASE)
6. Hitler Part 2

[Dave]

1. Rimmer has sex
2. Lister finds a special use for his own hand
3. Rimmer is stripped and oiled
4. After Lister finds a way to boost his sexual magnetism, Rimmer gets into a dress
5. Rimmer, in fishnet stockings, threatens to bum Lister to death
6. Everyone wants to kill themselves

[Rubber]

1. Tight PVC
2. Gold gimp suit
3. Cowboy fantasy dress-up
4. Bestiality in a veil
5. Roman fantasy dress-up
6. Pubic wig

[bloodteller]

1. Lister kills the President
2. Rimmer kills a Knight
3. The crew kill Lister’s wife
4. Kryten kills the ship’s power
5. Lister misses a man who killed himself
6. A Simulant kills himself
7. Lister allows himself to be killed
8. Lister tries to eat sweets

[bloodteller]

1. Rimmer kills everyone
2. Rimmer watches a man get killed
3. Lister kills his chances of becoming a Chef
4. An old man is killed
5. Two men are killed
6. Lister delights at watching Rimmer be killed

[Rubber]

1. Pretend cola
2. Dead insect
3. Raw coffee
4. Fourth round of toast
5. Spacenettle soup
6. Chocolate finger picket fence

[Rubber]

1. Evil Kevin Eldon spaceship
2. Sunken immorality spaceship
3. Insane medical robot plus vending machine spaceship
4. Paper elongated face man cock-and-balls-shaped spaceship
5. Art galley spaceship
6. Polymorph-frying suicide mission spaceship

[flanl3]

5. Two men are killed

I count three.

[flanl3]

1. Only Everybody…
2. Only Your Son, Bexley…
3. Only Holograms, If You Count Switching Holograms As Death…
4. Only The One Cat Ark…
5. Only Hallucinations…
6. Only Duplicate Rimmers…

[Dave]

1. Back in the Red, part one
2. Back in the Red, part two
3. Back in the Red, part three
4. Back to the Future
5. Back on the Sex Offenders’ Register
6. Back in the Captain’s Office
7. Backside of a dinosaur does a big shit
8. Glad to see the Back of it

[bloodteller]

on the original point of Only The Good being alright though, it is sort of an okay episode isn’t it? the stuff with the vending machine at the beginning is really good, and it’s one of the few VIII episodes where Holly actually gets a funny joke. i think its sadly one that suffers a lot from keeping scenes in that should’ve been cut, and cutting scenes that really needed to be kept in. you could probably assemble a fairly decent episode out of it if you felt like it

also the “6 HOURS LATER” caption is really unnecessary and this annoys me more than it should

[GlenTokyo]

All captions in VIII are shit and almost entirely unnecessary.

Font, accompanying sound effect, content.

[Ben Saunders]

The 6 hours later caption annoys me because it’s a different style from every other caption in the series

Apart from the mirror universe machine asspull, Only the Good is FINE. Not very good, though.

[bloodteller]

maybe the mirror universe machine was a Blue Peter project, and Kryten just nicked the one they prepared earlier

[International Debris]

Rimmer and the vending machine is the only thing I like about Only the Good.

[Ben Saunders]

I like “I’m giving you a big wet snog with oodles of Tommy Tongue”

[bloodteller]

i quite liked the “cell inspection in 10 minutes” joke

[Rubber]

I quite liked the look on Lister’s face when he realised his sexy nursie was the Cat. And when Kryten pushed Kochanski down the metal staircase. Not much else.

[Flap Jack]

I liked the bit where Rimmer kneed Death in the balls.

I hated “THE END? THE SMEG IT IS.” Not because it was bad (it was) but because it told me a show I loved ended on a sodding cliffhanger, and it did so 8 years beforehand, so there was almost no chance of another series.

[GlenTokyo]

I hate the grim reaper because he’s apparently real now in the Red Dwarf universe. I’d blame hallucination but they show him waking up before death appears.

Had similar feelings with Jesus in Lemons but thankfully that wasn’t Jesus Jesus.

[Flap Jack]

I’m fine with the Grim Reaper appearing in that scene, because it was in EPISODE 8 of Series VIII, so I had fully given up on Red Dwarf’s connection to reality by that point.

Though for what it’s worth, Rimmer being conscious doesn’t stop him from hallucinating.

[International Debris]

i quite liked the “cell inspection in 10 minutes” joke

Oh yes, that’s probably one of my favourite jokes in VIII. I was going to say “how did I forget that?”, but frankly most of the bunkroom stuff from the second half of the series just meshes into one for me anyway.

[flanl3]

Isn’t Only the Good… the one with ‘HAVE A FANTASTIC PERIOD’?

[Ben Saunders]

Yeah, fucking hell I love the fantastic period gag. It’s just not on, is it. Brilliant.

Although until 20 seconds ago when I googled it so I wouldn’t look like a fool for asking, I had no idea what Kryten meant by pouring blue stuff. When do women ever do that, I thought. Turns out it’s the liquid they used to show how effective sanitary pads were in adverts (?)

I still don’t know why you’d be playing tennis in tight white jeans though. Another ad?

[GlenTokyo]

Yeah iconic sanitary towel adverts. The blue stuff has only just stopped being used, and it was a big deal when they switched to a red liquid because that’s the state of society.

[bloodteller]

i always thought it was because if you wear white jeans and then you have your period the blood gets all over them and it’s a fucking mess to get it off because white clothes stain easier?

[Dax101]

I think i been fairly disappointed with alot of recent dwarf that by the time i watch timewave i was just numb to the disappointment of what i was watching.

I got through it knowing id forget it ever existed soon after.

[Dax101]

Oops that post above was for the The Silver Survey Results section.

My bad.

[Author]

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