Idea for an episode.

[smoke me a kipper]

Here is my idea for an episode.

The crew come across an old space station. inside they find a stasis booth. After opening the stasis booth they don’y believe it. It seems to be Hollister, but quite a bit older than they remember. Hollister managed to survive the accident and got off the Red Dwarf to get help, I will cut a long story short, at the end of the episode Hollister makes a death bed confession. It was he who caused the accident not Rimmer. He also tells Rimmer that When the accident occured, Yvonne Mcguder was on planet leave so did not get killed. She was pregnant with Rimmers baby.

That would be the start and end of the episode, there would need to be a chain of events in between, but I think you have the gist.

Thank’s for reading smeg heads. Smoke me a kipper I’ll be back for breakfast.

Topic

[Warbodog]

THE PURSUIT OF INTELLECTUAL FULFILMENT

I thought of the first two in that order (when he’s a hologram in Bodyswap, et al).

That could have been more challenging.

[Warbodog]

OREGON TRIAL

The S.S.S. Oregon’s Z-shift technicians are called to the captain’s office after the first technician grasses his subordinate up for smuggling some rabbits on board. The unquarantined animals have been set loose in the vents, so can’t be turned in. The captain considers sentencing the guilty party to 18 months in stasis, but reluctantly allows him to continue his duties.

Why is the captain so lenient? The fact that this had to be based around previously non-established expanded universe characters should not be considered suspicious at all.

[Pete Part Three]

STATUS LEAK

A forum poster finds a doorway into the future, when he inadvertently ends up on Page 109 at least two days ahead of schedule. Sadly, the ideas on that page are even worse.

[cwickham]

LATERAL THINKING IN THE RED ANSWERED

He waits until he dies, which is the only escape possible, in much the same way as it is for this thread.

[Dave]

BUMP

[Dave]

BUMPITY

[Dave]

BUMP BUMP

[Dave]

BUUUMP

[Dave]

THANKS FOR THE LAST FOUR SHITPOSTS

Fuck my arse we’re on page 109.

[Pete Part Three]

WIPE HOLE

Rimmer utilizes three sheets of toilet paper.

[cwickham]

BEYOND A JOKE

Regular contributors to the “Idea for an episode” thread wonder if the last four posts of page 108 were just a bit too banal.

[cwickham]

SHITPOSTING TIME!

Gordon Kennedy starts posting on the “Idea for an episode” thread.

[cwickham]

A QUESTION OF IDEAS FOR AN EPISODE

Ian Symes asks “Why, in God’s name, why?” for another 200 pages, but not formatted nearly so well as the first IDEA FOR AN EPISODE QUIZ BOOK.

[cwickham]

IDEA FOR AN EPISODE: THE ROLE PLAYING GAME

Book for a paper RPG that provides profiles for all 65,049,430 different characters and settings.

[cwickham]

IDEA FOR AN EPISODE SURVIVAL MANUAL

Paul Alexander writes a comprehensive guide on how to get out of this thread alive.

[cwickham]

IDEA FOR AN EPISODE LOG NO. 2022

Diary which features 29 ideas for episodes on each day.

[cwickham]

THE OFFICIAL IDEA FOR AN EPISODE COMPANION

Guide to the first 50 pages of the idea for an episode thread, with high-quality photographs of the regular posters’ padded cells.

[cwickham]

THE MAKING OF THE IDEA FOR AN EPISODE THREAD

Joe Nazzaro has a nervous breakdown after writing three pages.

[Dave]

BEYOND A JOKE

Regular contributors to the “Idea for an episode” thread wonder if the last four posts of page 108 were just a bit too banal.

AND YOU KNOW WHY NOBODY CAN READ ANYTHING? BECAUSE THERE ARE NO POSTS TO READ

A G&T contributor successfully tests whether anyone actually reads the last few posts on each page.

[cwickham]

PRIMORDIAL IDEAS FOR EPISODES

All the best ideas for episodes are presented in a book, due to a recent shortage of landfill.

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

MATHS IN THE CODE FOR THE IDEA FOR AN EPISODE THREAD

M-Corp are prevented from making the thread invisible by correcting a rounding error in the forum’s code.

[cwickham]

JUST THE IDEAS FOR EPISODES

Budget re-release of the “Idea for an episode” thread that only includes both legitimate ideas for episodes.

[Pete Part Three]

JUST THE NEGS

Spin-off collection featuring the ideas which are really thinly veiled negative comments about the quality of the thread itself.

[Dave]

JUST THE DREGS

Compilation featuring the worst 10,815 ideas in the thread so far.

[cwickham]

BLANK SPACE

Taylor Swift song about a list of the best ideas in the thread so far.

[cwickham]

SIX THOUSAND OF THE BEST

Audio CD featuring cwickham, Dave and quinn_drummer discussing the ideas for episodes featured in a special VHS set.

[cwickham]

IDEA FOR A MOBISODE

Short-lived mobile service which texts selected ideas for Red Dwarf episodes to the user. Closed down after a 20,000,000% rise in voided warranties.

[cwickham]

LAUNCHING THE IDEA FOR AN EPISODE THREAD

Original half-hour documentary on Ian Symes’ quest to launch the idea for an episode thread into the heart of the sun.

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

THREAD BUGGERS

G&T admins record a 90 minute video documentary cursing regular posters in their forum’s most popular thread.

[Paul Muller]

JUST THE LEGS

Special edition of the classic episodes presented in 8:3 ratio , cropped in so that only the actor’s lower limbs are visible in shot.

[Warbodog]

I SAW THE WHOLE THING, ALL THREE TERRIBLE HOURS OF IT

When Cat comments that he found a further revival of Tales from the Riverbank: TNG disappointing and switched off, Lister feels left out and hatewatches the whole series he already knows he isn’t going to enjoy so he can join in and be the best at not liking it, rather than doing anything else.

[cwickham]

MATHS IN THE RED PART EIGHTY-EIGHT

If the Dwarfers put one Starbug in each landing bay, they have one Starbug too many. If they put two Starbugs in each landing bay, they have one landing bay too many. How many Starbugs and landing bays does Red Dwarf have?

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

COMPUTE!

4 craft and 3 bays

[Jenuall]

THERE’S JUST ONE THING THAT STILL BAFFLES ME

What do they do with Blue Midget?!

[Dave]

YOU NEVER EARN, DO YOU

Lister draws an ‘H’ on his forehead in cream, and mocks Rimmer for no longer drawing a JMC salary because he’s dead.

[Dave]

YOU NEVER YEARN, DO YOU

Lister draws an ‘H’ on his forehead in cream, and mocks Rimmer for having such limited ambitions.

[Dave]

YOU NEVER LEAN, DO YOU

Lister draws an ‘H’ on his forehead in cream, and compliments Rimmer on his excellent posture.

[Dave]

YOU NEVER BURN, DO YOU

Lister draws an ‘H’ on his forehead in cream, and notes that, as a hologram, Rimmer is not flammable.

[Dave]

YOU NEVER GURN, DO YOU

Lister draws an ‘H’ on his forehead in cream, and mocks Rimmer for the inflexibility of his facial muscles.

[Dave]

YOU NEVER KERN, DO YOU

Lister draws an ‘H’ on his forehead in cream, and mocks Rimmer for not spacing letters out properly.

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

YOU NEVER TURN, DO YOU

Lister draws a ‘T’ on his forehead in cream, and mocks Thatcher for her refuse to manoeuvre at angels of 90-180 degrees to her current trajectory.

[Pete Part Three]

YOU NEVER WORMDO, YOU

I don’t know. What’s a Wormdo?

[Jenuall]

YOU NEVER PERM, DO YOU

Cat draws an L on his forehead in facial cream and mocks Lister for not perming his leg hairs

[Dave]

YOU NEVERLAND, DON’T YOU

Rimmer encounters a 1993 Michael Jackson.

[cwickham]

MATHS IN THE RED PART EIGHTY-NINE

After being restored to its original specifications by the nanobots, Red Dwarf is fifteen miles long. Its ram scoop is as long as its rear booster. If the ram scoop was twice as long as it really is, the ram scoop and the booster would together be as long as what’s in between. How long is each part of the ship?

[Quinn: Clochebusters World Champion]

YOU NEVER LEND A HAND, DO YOU

Lister draws an ‘H’ on his forehead and mocks Rimmer’s holographic status and inability to touch anything.

[Dave]

YOU NEVER CHURN, DO YOU

After Lister and Kochanski start a farm on Fiji, they draw an ‘H’ on their foreheads in cream and berate Rimmer for not helping to make more of it from all the milk they’ve collected.

[Jenuall]

8 WEEKS PD!?

Ram scoop and booster are 3 miles and the “body” is 9

[cwickham]

RIGHT, OKAY, GO ON

The recent trend of Maths in the Red questions being answered correctly continues.

[Pete Part Three]

BATHS IN THE THREAD

A forum poster decides to enjoy his favourite forum thread in the bath. If he has 4 bottles of shampoo, and two bars of soap, where exactly did he put his loofah?

[Author]

Replies