Home Forums Ganymede & Titan Forum Idea for an episode.

Viewing 100 posts - 8,201 through 8,300 (of 8,811 total)
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  • #262382
    Dave
    Participant

    WE NEED TO THINK OF A FRESH GAG FOR NEW PAGES

    Don’t we.

    #262383

    AN 83 PAGE LONG THREAD, HOWS THAT GOING TO WORK?

    No seriously, I’m still not quite sure.

    #262395
    cwickham
    Participant

    Oh ye gods we’re on the eighty-third page

    #262396
    cwickham
    Participant

    UNDERGROUND, OVERGROUND, POLYMORPHING FREE

    Test reel of footage shot by Mike Agnew for a proposed puppet-based CBBC spinoff starring the Polymorph, shot circa 1990.

    #262397
    clem
    Participant

    OM – BLING-FREE

    In a bid to be taken more seriously, young Lister stops wearing his usual ostentatious stage get-up. “We want Smeg and the Heads’ music to speak for itself, y’know?” says Dobbin in an interview in Bido Lito!

    #262398
    Dave
    Participant

    ONE-BALLING GLEE

    Lister delightedly tells a crowd attending a nazi rally that Hitler only has one testicle.

    #262399
    Dave
    Participant

    UN-BOILING FREE

    On Backwards Earth, Rimmer is forced to un-boil the eggs that Kryten regurgitates before/after “eating” them onstage so that he can then perform the “eating” trick beforehand/afterwards.

    #262400
    Dave
    Participant

    ONE BORING FEE

    GNP pays an electricity bill.

    #262402
    cwickham
    Participant

    MATHS IN THE RED PART FIFTEEN

    Lister is tasked by Rimmer with repairing all of the broken clocks on board Red Dwarf. He takes six clocks and a list of their individual problems into his bunkroom, and starts by setting them all to the correct time at the start of the hour. He then gets distracted by fourteen pints of lager, and wakes up some time later, unsure what time it is.

    He looks at the six broken clocks, which currently read: 10.30, 3.25, 5.30, 8.00, 12.45, 7.05.

    According to his list, only Kochanski’s clock shows the correct time. Since being set, Rimmer’s clock will have lost 2 hours and 5 minutes. Petersen’s clock goes at exactly half speed. Hollister’s clock hasn’t worked ever since he sat on it. Chen’s clock gains 10 minutes every hour. Selby’s clock goes backwards.

    What time is it now?

    #262403
    Dave
    Participant

    DYEING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy tie-dyes a T-shirt.

    #262404
    Dave
    Participant

    DRYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy tests out some hairdryers.

    #262405
    Dave
    Participant

    DRIVING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy becomes the new host of Top Gear.

    #262406
    Dave
    Participant

    CRYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy is fired from Top Gear.

    #262407

    FRYING TIME

    Gordon Kenney hosts a second round of Can’t Smeg Won’t Smeg.

    #262408
    Dave
    Participant

    LYIN’ TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy listens to some Jimmy Nail.

    #262409
    Dave
    Participant

    SPYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy is cast as the new James Bond.

    #262410
    Dave
    Participant

    BUYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy gets drunk and goes on ebay.

    #262411
    Dave
    Participant

    FLYING TIME!

    Gordon Kenney co-hosts a third round of Can’t Smeg Won’t Smeg with Taiwan Tony.

    #262413
    cwickham
    Participant

    SIGHING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy remembers that time the producers of Robin Hood left him outside a Hungarian hospital in a wheelbarrow after he injured himself on set.

    #262414
    cwickham
    Participant

    SIGHING TIME! PART TWO

    Gordon Kennedy remembers the ending of the second series of Robin Hood where the showrunners took total leave of their senses, and the total production clusterfuck on the third series.

    #262415
    cwickham
    Participant

    VYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy vies for a TV return for Absolutely.

    #262416
    cwickham
    Participant

    RYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy becomes a farmer, but the only thing he harvests is rye.

    #262417
    cwickham
    Participant

    TRYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy has a very trying time.

    #262418
    cwickham
    Participant

    MAYAN TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy becomes a time traveller.

    #262419
    cwickham
    Participant

    BIDEN TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy announces his endorsement in the US election.

    #262420
    cwickham
    Participant

    TRYING TIME! PART TWO

    Gordon Kennedy recalls his experiences of working with Keith Allen on Robin Hood.

    #262421
    cwickham
    Participant

    DYING A LIME!

    Gordon Kennedy starts a business where he paints fruit different colours and sells them to restaurants.

    #262422
    cwickham
    Participant

    BUYING A MINE!

    Gordon Kennedy purchases some explosive devices.

    #262423
    cwickham
    Participant

    DYING MIME!

    Gordon Kennedy laments the death of mime as an art form.

    #262424
    Dave
    Participant

    FILING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy enthusiastically files his tax returns.

    #262425
    cwickham
    Participant

    FLYING SLIME!

    Gordon Kennedy is hit by somebody’s projectile vomiting.

    #262426
    Dave
    Participant

    DEFYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy defies the very concept of time by refusing to age.

    #262427
    cwickham
    Participant

    LYING RHYME!

    Gordon Kennedy composes a libellous song about Keith Allen.

    #262428
    Dave
    Participant

    PYONGYANG TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy moves to North Korea.

    #262429
    cwickham
    Participant

    PIEING VINE!

    Gordon Kennedy posts videos to the Internet of him throwing custard pies in peoples’ faces.

    #262430
    cwickham
    Participant

    KIM JONG TIME!

    After moving to North Korea, Gordon Kennedy forms an unlikely friendship.

    #262431
    Dave
    Participant

    NAPKIN RING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy awkwardly displays his clumsy middle-class aspirations with an entirely ornamental and useless piece of tableware.

    #262432
    cwickham
    Participant

    ADVENTURE TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy reprises his role as Hudzen in order to kill Finn and Jake.

    #262433
    cwickham
    Participant

    STYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy decides to live the rest of his life as a pig.

    #262434
    Dave
    Participant

    PSI-MOON TIME!

    Alternative title for Terrorform that will appear on Gordon Kennedy’s copy of the 4k boxset.

    #262435
    cwickham
    Participant

    DIALLING A NINE!

    Gordon Kennedy calls for an ambulance.

    #262436
    cwickham
    Participant

    AISLING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy pitches a sequel to The Last Day where Hudzen falls in love with a mechanoid played by Aisling Bea.

    #262437
    cwickham
    Participant

    JIBING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy makes some jibes.

    #262438
    cwickham
    Participant

    JIVING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy signs up for the new series of Strictly Come Dancing.

    #262439
    Dave
    Participant

    DIAMOND MINE!

    Gordon Kennedy credulously falls for an email scam claiming that he is due a £5m windfall from an African diamond mine, which will be wired to him as long as he first sends them £3000 for some spurious reason.

    #262440
    Dave
    Participant

    DENTAL PLAN!

    Lisa needs braces.

    #262441
    cwickham
    Participant

    TILING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy does some DIY work on his bathroom.

    #262442
    cwickham
    Participant

    RECITING FINE!

    Gordon Kennedy is praised for his performance at a poetry recital.

    #262443
    cwickham
    Participant

    GUILING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy acts all deceitful.

    #262444
    cwickham
    Participant

    GUILING FINE!

    Gordon Kennedy goes into politics, quickly becomes a treasury minister, and introduces some deceptive new taxes.

    #262445
    Dave
    Participant

    SHYLOCK TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy is cast in The Merchant Of Venice.

    #262446
    cwickham
    Participant

    HIGHLAND TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy returns to his home country.

    #262447
    cwickham
    Participant

    BUYING SLIME!

    Gordon Kennedy corners the world market in slime.

    #262448
    cwickham
    Participant

    FRYING SLIME!

    Gordon Kennedy sets all his slime on fire.

    #262449
    cwickham
    Participant

    HIGH MING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy foolishly places all his priceless Ming vases on very tall, narrow sidetables.

    #262450
    cwickham
    Participant

    HIGH WING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy becomes a wing walker.

    #262451
    cwickham
    Participant

    KAYA RING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy proposes marriage to the actress Kaya Scodelario.

    #262452
    cwickham
    Participant

    KAYAKING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy goes kayaking.

    #262453
    cwickham
    Participant

    FILING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy files a lawsuit against Ganymede & Titan because of three people who keep on making bizarre allegations about him because they can form the basis of tortured puns on a line he said in an episode of Red Dwarf 31 years ago.

    #262454
    cwickham
    Participant

    FILING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy goes for a manicure.

    #262455
    cwickham
    Participant

    SHINING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy goes insane after accepting a job as caretaker in a remote hotel.

    #262456
    cwickham
    Participant

    BLING BLING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy buys lots of jewellery.

    #262461

    CHICO TIME!

    Gordon Kenney accepts a role playing the lead in the biopic of a contestant on the second series of the X-Factor.

    #262462

    DOING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy gets sent down after it is revealed he didn’t buy all that jewellery.

    #262463

    OUT OF CRIME!

    Gordon Kennedy gets bored because it’s hard to do crime in the slammer.

    #262464

    WOOING TIME!

    A rather attractive new inmate catches Gordon Kennedy’s eye.

    #262465

    BOOING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy attends the prison pantomime.

    #262466

    SCREWING TIME!

    Gordon finally hooks up with the new inmate.

    #262467

    OUT OF TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy travels back in time but is killed by his past self when he finds out he made a career of knocking over high street jewellers.

    #262468

    HIRING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy starts recruiting for his prison gang.

    #262469

    PRYING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy starts asking uncomfortable questions about fellow inmates.

    #262470

    CRYER TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy is given day release to act as the lead in the biopic of a Yorkshire comedians life.

    #262472

    FAT FRYER TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy has calls for a very painful way to deal with disrespectful inmates.

    #262473

    HIGH WIRE TIME!

    As part of an escape attempt, Gordon Kennedy must traverse a high wire between the separate roofs of the prison buildings, unaided and without a harness.

    #262474
    evilmorwen
    Participant

    VIOLIN TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy learns Grade 8 violin in his three million year journey from Diva Droid’s dispatch centre to the Red Dwarf.

    #262475

    WINE TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy celebrates his escape from the nick by visiting his favourite wine bar.

    #262477

    JAVLIN TIME!

    In an attempt to leave his criminal past behind him, Gordon Kennedy enters the sporting world in a bid for the olympics.

    #262478

    OUTATIME!

    Gordon Kennedy reveals his favourite Back to the Future punny numberplate.

    #262479

    IT’S MORPHIN’ TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy joins the cast of The Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers.

    #262481

    WASTING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy reveals his favourite early era blink-182 track.

    #262482

    CLOSING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy reveals his favourite Semisonic track.

    #262483

    CHILD IN TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy reveals his favourite Deep Purple track.

    #262485

    IN TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy reveals his favourite REM compilation CD.

    #262486

    FEEDING TIME!

    After failing to secure a place at the next Olympic Games, Gordon Kennedy turns to zoology always volunteers to feed the animals.

    #262487

    I’M FINE THANK YOU SUSAN KENNEDY

    After taking a knock to the head, Kryten reassures long standing Neighbours character that he is, indeed, fine.

    #262488
    cwickham
    Participant

    GOOGLING TIME!

    Gordon Kennedy discovers this page of G&T whilst searching the web for his own name, and is extremely confused.

    #262489

    STRIKE A LIGHT, IT’S GORDON KENNEDY!

    Norman Lovett is star struck when he meets Gordon Kennedy at his local chess club.

    #262490

    GORDON KENNEDY, YES CHEN!

    Chen asked whether it was Gordon Kennedy who played Hudson 10 in The Last Day.

    #262491
    cwickham
    Participant

    I DON’T UNDERSTAND, ALL WE DID IS SAVE GORDON KENNEDY’S LIFE

    Disaster is narrowly averted on the set of The Last Day when Gordon Kennedy really is troubled by the metaphysical implications of there being no Silicon Heaven.

    #262494
    Dave
    Participant

    HE WAS A FINE MAN

    Rimmer confidently tells Cat that John F Kennedy was an upstanding human being, only to realise a couple of hours later that he was actually thinking of Gordon Kennedy at the time.

    #262495
    Dave
    Participant

    THE KENNEDY ASSASSINATION

    Gordon Kennedy travels back in time and accidentally knocks Lee Harvey Oswald out of a window, forcing him to complete the job himself.

    #262496
    Dave
    Participant

    KEN OF WORMS

    Gordon Kennedy reveals that he is still a virgin, only to be seduced shortly thereafter by a Polymorph disguised as a female Hudzen 10.

    #262498
    Dave
    Participant

    KEN OF WORDS

    Gordon Kennedy reads the dictionary.

    #262499
    Dave
    Participant

    KEN OF BURNS

    Gordon Kennedy insists that Red Dwarf halt production to hold a Burns Night celebration.

    #262500
    Dave
    Participant

    KEN OF TURDS

    Gordon Kennedy gets the runs after some dodgy on-set catering.

    #262501
    Dave
    Participant

    KEN OF WORMS: ARMAGEDDON

    Gordon Kennedy reveals his favourite iteration of the Team 17 multiplayer classic.

    #262502
    Dave
    Participant

    I’M JUST DOING MY JOB – IT’S NOT MY FAULT IF I LOVE IT

    Gordon Kennedy reflects on his acting career.

    #262503
    Dave
    Participant

    I’M JUST DOING MY JOB – IT’S NOT MY FAULT IF I LOVE ‘IT’

    Gordon Kennedy is constantly distracted from his job by his love of Stephen King’s ‘It’.

    #262504
    Dave
    Participant

    I’M JUST DOING MY JOB – IT’S NOT MY FAULT IF I LOVE I.T.

    Gordon Kennedy helps out by fixing a lot of minor computer issues on set.

    #262505
    Dave
    Participant

    THE LAST -DY

    Maybe we stop now with the Gordon Kennedy jokes.

Viewing 100 posts - 8,201 through 8,300 (of 8,811 total)
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