Sebby P

[Nancy Hemming]

It’s to late, everyone already knows what you are seb. Why do you think i waited for DJ to post, over 6000 views (in 3 days) saw the topic before you deleted it.
Now both red dwarf sites are on lock down, and you have deleted real members, it’s a good start.

Seb P wrote: .

Seems we’ve (well, I’ve) got a new fun game, which is “Figure out which of the accounts I’ve approved in the last couple of months are actually sock puppet accounts created by whoever polysmorph was”.

Shouldn’t prove too difficult if they’re all as unimaginatively-named (in either handle or email address) as the ones that have so far poked fun at my being fat (well done, that’s clever, but honestly you can’t say anything about my weight that I haven’t already said myself), but we’ll see.

Unfortunately, this has a negative effect on the forum, as it means I have to get much stricter and more careful about approving new accounts that come from free email servers, because otherwise the forum is going to be hammered with spam posts. On the bright side, the actions of this individual neatly summarise why I am under no obligation whatsoever to respond to their nonsense or pass on their spurious “concerns” to anyone at GNP, because everything they’re doing proves that they’re not motivated by a desire to see this forum run fairly and properly. If they were, they wouldn’t be doing their best to ruin it.

If they show up again and it’s at a time when I’m not around to deal with it, then please don’t engage with them. It should be quite clear to you now that their only goal is to take this place down. Ignore them as best you can and I’ll delete things as I find them.

“lol” You never were going to pass on these complaints against you unless you consider doing that by deleting the threads and banning the first account for no reason other than to cover it up and not deal with it so second account made it clear you can not delete the truth. This is now what you get.
So who you trying to convince that you ever were going to follow the rules? your “regulars” aka sheep or yourself? or the people that don’t post and just read who are seeing you for the real you.
Since you abuse your admin and refuse to even take complaints we shall be playing this “game” until you are replaced or everyone leaves. You have no way of stopping me from making new accounts and as you can see your screening proses is horrible and infective proved by this new one.
I will do this forever then eventually move on to other more direct ways of “ruining” this forum and individual ips as well. Just like how you are ruining it with your abuse and clique like ways. This world has billions of people and millions of red dwarf fans and yet there are only 15 people active here in years think about it (3-4 of them are harrys pathological lying multiple personality disorder you need a new psychiatrist and new meds they are not working. (moph space sim kittypaws ..) + 1 Mr vegetable the trendy poser contradicting facade, go get a real assessment from a psychiatrist and not your GM btw nice drama queen performance, you to can name 2 things you have accomplished in life and what is your education? +1 joke of a troll with multiple accounts aka harrys and his simple technique of saying the negative opposite of one named simulant who’s a closet homo who is harry talking to himself, it is definitely a regular from here’s alter ego which again points back to harry, and seb knows about it which goes against the multi account rule and why he wont do anything about sim.)
Boz you’re that guy a goof you’re not special you’re job is not special and you could not write a blog to save your horrible life and buddy jmc needs to name 2 things he has accomplished in life and what education he has, google much? You all can do that see what you come up with.
(harry makes a new account each year, space = 2009 anti everything 2009 simon 2009 3 or more before his main was back fandango = 2010 moph = 2011 simulant = 2012 ( not only is that pathetic but really really disturbing)(+uses phone to multi same time) cloud is prob him too and (kittypaws = becks harry)
plus this new approval system is not helping. Which i shall make even worse. If you were here to do your job daily you would not need this useless confirmation. Which you put in place because of the kitchen spam, which you could of just deleted their accounts like you did mine. If you were doing your JOB instead your fat lazy ass did this so you didn’t have to.
If you think you are not harry and are on this list you may prove yourself very easily with a pic of you holding a sign saying i am not harry no blah blah I’m not harry talking, post the pic you have no excuse.

ps i already have 4 accounts on here you have not deleted any of them, you just deleted real members gj, try screening and reviewing old accounts better have fun.
when you are gone you will have more time to try that thing called exercise out and you will end up thanking me yet nothing will cure the ugly and your tiny… and making light of your fat does not work sorry to say “:)”

another example of seb leading by example in a “family friendly forum” and abusing the language rules while talking about rules…rather ironic
Seb P wrote: that fans know NOT to be dicks, and that the dicks were the exception rather than the rule

Seb P wrote:

polysmorph wrote:

Seb P wrote:

polysmorph wrote:

So it’s up to the new guy to make this forum not boring? Great logic. Judging by how you treat new people no wonder this place is so horrible.

You’ve posted seventeen times in the three years you say you’ve been reading. I’d say there are considerably more constructive ways you could improve things, if you’re that concerned, than to start a thread as negative as this.

What you’ve basically done is waltzed in and told everyone “You’re not entertaining me enough, sort it out, although I’m not going to do anything about it myself”. And I’M the one who treats people badly?

If you read correctly you would see i enjoyed this forum very much until you decided to ban the only entertaining thing on this forum, and you never even said why exactly you banned him?
Was it constructive losing all those threads and a funny poster for your personal reasons? not very professional. Yes you are the one who treats new people badly along with the other regulars. Going through the old topics and posts it paints a clear picture who the aggressors are.

I made very clear why: he posted large amounts of information about how to grow and cultivate illegal drugs, the presence of which on this forum left the company that pays for and hosts it legally actionable. I deleted it, warned him that if he posted it again he’d be banned, and he posted it again. This was added to his track record of repeatedly pushing the rules, baiting me at every turn, and insulting other posters. Whether or not he’d created loads of threads, or if some people thought of him as “a funny poster”, is utterly irrelevant – he broke the rules, deliberately and wilfully. If you want to be annoyed at anyone for his absence and for those threads disappearing, be annoyed at him. He was given every chance to behave, and in the end essentially banned himself.

This forum costs GNP time, effort and money to keep running – it’s not a free and open concern, it’s not a democracy. We are not obliged to indulge everybody’s whims.

And frankly, if the only thing you found entertaining about a Red Dwarf discussion forum was off-topic nonsense from an immature adolescent, might I suggest you’re probably not in the right place in the first place?

Which thread? The topic about medical marijuana, that thread was there for months. Then from what i saw the day your friend was attacked for attacking one of his is when that thread came into question? seems very fitting. I do not recall you saying anything about him being banned. You used that as a poor excuse and made the forums worse by your personal actions and lies. He did not break any rule and if he did why was that thread up there for months and why did you Lie about the part saying he posted information how to grow and cultivate illegal drugs? He did not mention that at all, it was which flavors and strains and medical benefits there are.

This forum is for everyone and not your personal unprofessional actions and deceiving lies. Is there someone at GNP i can contact to complain about your performance? It is only fair for people to voice their opinions about you and your personal playground of regulars.

One more point, is it appropriate to insult someone on this forum for being an adolescent? This forum is for all ages and you just said that an adolescent is in the wrong place when they come here and called him immature to top it off and attacking him for posting off topic comments in the garbage pod which is specifically for off topic discussion. What kind of example is lying admin abuse and insulting young people and calling them names. Your abuse in many forms is making people not want to join and participate on these once great forums, specially when they watch you treat your group differently and act in this very unprofessional way.

Yes you have nothing to say because you know you’re in the wrong and got busted for lying and abusing. You wont even provide a contact address to your superiors. You think you’re above it, it’s time for an admin change here. Part of the reason you hated reznor so much is because he had to remind you to do your job since you are never here or paying attention and then you purposely ignore it out of spite. A great example is when you told everyone in the forum that the next person to have swears in their youtube will be punished and banned. Then Mr vegetables goes and does it two times, and it was pointed out to you yet again and nothing.

How long did it take you to fix the kitchen spam, which i read so much about? 2 weeks?

Freeborn Leveller – aka The Veggie Vamp wrote:

The Troll wrote:

Then Mr vegetables goes and does it two times, and it was pointed out to you yet again and nothing.

No I didn’t. That one-off incident you’re childishly referring to showed you/Reznor up for being the trouble starting agitator you are. It was a perfect example of *you* being a contradictory, disruptive troll. You have some serious psychological issues, kid.

How you have managed to emotionally manipulate and conn two people of this forum into thinking you’re a nice guy and a victim is beyond me. You’re a nasty, pedantic, childish, negative troll.

ps: This troll certainly does appear to be Reznor or Dodgy Danny, although I can’t be 100% certain about that.. But surely no one in their right mind would use Reznor of all people as an example to try to make Seb or any other member look bad. This Polysmorph guy is bonkers.

Also, those of us paying attention already know the Trent Reznor wannabe posts from the Sockpuppet account, or a least has done on at least one occasion according to Dodgy Danny. It really is getting quite boring now though.

Speaking of perfect examples this is a perfect example of exactly what i was talking about. Positive these attacks are against the rules to these forums. Lets see what seb will do or if he really treats this like his playground and the rules only apply to the people he decides should follow also known as the non regulars.

Topic

[Boz]

It’s like an itch I can’t scratch. I believe he’s the Murtaugh to my Riggs.

[JamesTC]

And don’t feed it after midnight.

[Jonsmad]

Stop replying to it! You’re giving it what it wants. This will be my only post in this thread.

Head slapping? IGNORE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Nancy Hemming]

lol come on people can’t even name 1 out of all of you? :P

btw gremlins is a horrible movie :)

[JamesTC]

It turns out everybody else is ugly and she is beautiful.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol who my mother? btw were at number 84 in the fuck line, who has number 84? show her your tiny pee pee :P

[JamesTC]

It turns out she was an alien all along and the invaders are humans.

[JamesTC]

It turns out he is dead and is trying to be fooled into hell by a demon but the dog stopped him in time. He gets into heaven.

[JamesTC]

It turns out they are all toys in a barrel.

[Bayliss]

I’d bet Dollars to Donuts he’s some 400 pound bastard still living in his mum’s basement still jerking off to Sarah Michelle Gellar posters. Posting angry pissy rants on the internet making Drama is his way of having fun because he doesn’t have anything better to do with his life because he doesn’t have to go into his shift at McDonald’s yet.

Not that there would be anything wrong with that other then the fact that he is an asshole

[Nancy Hemming]

lol “Sarah Michelle Gellar posters” really? :P

[anniescribe]

Sweetie, you try so hard. I don’t know what in life turned you into an angry human with no job and no friends that you can hang around here for hours hitting Submit, Submit, Submit, but I think just being you is probably its own punishment. Nothing anyone here can say to you can top that – that’s why you enjoy encouraging the continued abuse.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol you people act like this is all one sided? you condemn me for saying true things and then after complaining about it you all go on and try to do it yourselves, what would this make you? :P

hah ponder that while i brb and go eat the yummmy bacon sandwich my gf made for me :)

[Jonsmad]

Bored of this now, I’m off to join Danny in ignoreland, think he’s right. Was fun but I think the punchline for me was looking at that forum link this guy’s involved in that’s empty, (the root seems to be some shit computer game hobby he’s invested time in), and it contains one post about this place attacking him, thats hilarious a lonely punchline enough for me. Sort of got a red dwarf episode in my head now called The shit inquisitor, where instead of jack docherty it’s some one like alan carr doing the voice and then the end of the episode we find out the character copied the inquisitor cus he couldnt think of anything better to do, and actually he lives the worst life in all of the red dwarf universe, worse than Rimmer or Duane and picked up the time gauntlet as his only way of tapping into other peoples lives. His catchphrase due to a corupted helmet voice box is,”All will be judged by my standards, because im a twat obviously.”

[Nancy Hemming]

lol awww jon you bored now? we were just going to tackle everyone here high school experience and how they get along with their parents. You people might as well get it out now instead of paying someone like me lots of $ in the future yet i bet you already are spending it :P

As for a red dwarf connection it’s pretty obvious why you people can relate to it so well
the 2 main characters are absolute failures, Mr rimmer is complete failure has accomplished nothing, blames his parents like you all
and mr lister is a complete joke alcoholic failure with no accomplishments yet is given the chance to be a hero and is the “cool” guy which you all wish to be :)

So who would like to go first?
come lay down on this couch and let it out :)

[Nancy Hemming]

lol awww jon you bored now? we were just going to tackle everyone here high school experience and how they get along with their parents. You people might as well get it out now instead of paying someone like me lots of $ in the future yet i bet you already are spending it :P

As for a red dwarf connection it’s pretty obvious why you people can relate to it so well
the 2 main characters are absolute failures, Mr rimmer is complete failure has accomplished nothing, blames his parents like you all
and mr lister is a complete joke alcoholic failure with no accomplishments yet is given the chance to be a hero and is the “cool” guy which you all wish to be :)

So who would like to go first?
come lay down on this couch and let it out :)

[si]

Above post posted twice twenty minutes apart as no-one gave a shit the first time.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol si is that you volunteering to go first? :P

[si]

Just attempting to point out what you’re obviously unable to comprehend.

[pendo86]

Oh damn, I can’t believe I’ve missed out on all the fun!

Nancy, you’re hilarious sunshine!

[Nancy Hemming]

lol so si you ready yet? let me help you “comprehend” your mental state :)

I would like to take this time to thank all the people like you with these problems, you are the reason i was just able to buy the new snowmobile you saw in the picture. Yes that’s right i “help” people like you aka make lots and lots of $ off your pain.

Then again i should probably be thanking your parents.
Thank you :)

[Alex]

Fucking hell. I don’t check the site for *one* day and this thread carries on for 103 more messages. This is fast becoming one of the most popular threads. I like to view it like the old Victorian freak shows. Pay a penny, see the freak.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol hey alex did you manage to forget it’s your turn? :)

It’s not a penny anymore it’s the present now, and it will cost you 3.50$
If you would like to do the math(think you can manage it), you may only see the show 4 more times before your this months paycheck/welfare has run out :P

[Nancy Hemming]

All of you are probably wondering to yourselves “why are the admins allowing this thread to stay?”

It’s very simple, all you have to ask yourself is, who would benefit from this?
who could it be?
The admins from here who would be in the position to take sebs job on the TOS?
and a little birdie told me that the big boys from G&T don’t get along with the big boy from TOS
they think it’s gone to his head and they do not like his personality yet are willing to be civil for the sake of RD.

Solved. :)

P.S (1) ooo sebby your site is dying even more, no new posts no new threads ohh wait wait 1 from harrys other account cloud. Did i mention no new members? That’s a given :)

[Moonlight]

So I stumbled upon this thread and what the actual fuck?

[locusceruleus]

> hah ponder that while i brb and go eat the yummmy bacon sandwich my gf made for me :)

There are a handful of things of which I’m sure of in this world. One is that a grown man who calls himself Nancy and uses the word ‘yummy’ will never have his girlfriend make him a sandwich.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol she begs to differ (try not to jerk it to many times to her ppl) :P
http://i40.tinypic.com/2ujpf2f.jpg
aww locus does your BF make you yummy sandwiches? or do you play the woman role? :P

[locusceruleus]

Get one with her holding a sign saying ‘I made Nancy Hemming a bacon sandwich’ and I’ll be thoroughly convinced.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol oh i’ll be getting right on that one for yea ;)

so does he? or do you?
who’s on top? :P

[Ben Paddon]

[locusceruleus]

>lol oh i’ll be getting right on that one for yea ;)

Once you’ve figured out which came first, the imaginary girlfriend or the imaginary sandwich.
If it helps I find it marginally more credible that you once had a sandwich.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol what happens when they both are real? will your denial be able to accept it? or will you come up with more bitter/jealousness? :P

“There are a handful of things of which I’m sure of in this world. One is that a grown man who calls himself Nancy and uses the word ‘yummy’ will never have his girlfriend make him a sandwich.”

How you so sure then? :P
you have any requests at what she should make me next?
I’m thinking maui ribs mmmmm, what do you think?
you ponder that while i brb and go get a slurpee and some cheetoz :)

[Phil]

“It’s very simple, all you have to ask yourself is, who would benefit from this?
who could it be?
The admins from here who would be in the position to take sebs job on the TOS?
and a little birdie told me that the big boys from G&T don’t get along with the big boy from TOS
they think it’s gone to his head and they do not like his personality yet are willing to be civil for the sake of RD.
Solved. :)”

Not only does that fail to solve the question you yourself constructed, but speaking as someone who…I dunno…pays attention to things that actually happen as opposed to whatever’s going on in your head, it’s also pretty clearly utter garbage.

Do go on, though. I find that you somehow manage to talk remarkable sense in the final sentence of every post you make.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol ohh? you just say this yet don’t explain why you think this is?
go on tell us why this is “utter garbage” :)

[Phil]

Explain? Sure. I’ve been here for years and gotten to know everyone and none of your conjecture and theorizing synchs up with reality in any way.

Hope this helps.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol nope, try again. This time more to do with WHY you think this
or is the “you “know” everyone” it? :P

[Phil]

“try again.”

lol nope

[Nancy Hemming]

lol well since you’re not even going to try I’ll give you a tip anyways.
No one knows anyone, everyone has their deep dark secrets that no one knows or just normal every day stuff people don’t tell others no matter how “close” they are. I’m sure in your case though you must know, since you know these “people” as internet friends which you may or may not have met a couple times. You sir must know all. :)

Write that down. :)

[Joey TORDFC]

“a little birdie told me that the big boys from G&T don’t get along with the big boy from TOS
they think it’s gone to his head and they do not like his personality yet are willing to be civil for the sake of RD.”

Oh, Nancy, Nancy, Nancy.

“No one knows anyone, everyone has their deep dark secrets that no one knows or just normal every day stuff people don’t tell others no matter how “close” they are.”

Yet, apparently, they told your little birdie. Who knew?

[Nancy Hemming]

lol ohhh joey look who’s back thought you said bye? wait i know you did

“Ok bye. ”

welcome back :P

Now here’s another tip for you people
when you want to find out who’s behind something/anything 99% of the time it will be the person who benefits from it.

Write that down.

As for the birdie you’re gonna have to ask him/her :P

but add those 2 together and what do you get? It does not take Sherlock holmes

thanks for coming back out though joey
oh and get new glasses/hair colour yea trendy poser :)

[Seb Patrick]

the big boys from G&T don’t get along with the big boy from TOS
they think it’s gone to his head and they do not like his personality

This is the only correct thing you’ve said in this entire thread.

It’s funny, because Cappsy explained in elaborate detail just how much he and the rest of the G&T gang hated me in the best man speech he gave at my wedding recently, at which point Ian, John and Tanya all loudly shouted their agreement. It made for quite an unpleasant scene.

It’s uncanny that you’ve figured this out even though you weren’t there. My hat off to you.

[Pete Part Three]

>All of you are probably wondering to yourselves “why are the admins allowing this thread to stay?”

Because a) it’s harmless and b) it’s moderately amusing to pop in occasionally and note that you’re STILL posting relentlessly despite the fact that you ran out of things to say before you even started.

[Joey TORDFC]

“thanks for coming back out though joey
oh and get new glasses/hair colour yea trendy poser :)”

That’s alright, thanks for the welcome back Nance, I am enjoying this tremendously :)

Well I lost those glasses on a ‘plane, unfortunately. So I did get new glasses quite recently. Good thing too because I need them to see further than my computer screen. Too much wanking :(

Thanks for the advice on the hair Nicky Clarke, I was just in fact considering going back to my natural colour, which is in fact an electric blue.

[si]

Introducing JOHN HURT as NANCY.

[Alex]

> lol hey alex did you manage to forget it’s your turn? :)

No, I just don’t sit with this site on constant refresh as I seem to have a more active and interesting social life than you do which means I don’t always have time to check internet forums.

I chose not to go on about ‘achievements’ at the time as it’d be the most horrendous kind of self congratulatory wank all over this already toss filled thread. I also have an objection to conversing with those who talk about themselves in the third person as it’s usually a sign that all the coats in their house will have special tie back arms with locks. What the fuck though, this is a pointless exercise but I’ve got five minutes to kill and I might enjoy the laugh.

You graduated from uni? Woop-de-fucking-do. So did a vast majority of the users here (including myself) and we have never used it as a way of lauding it over others you cock-nosed halfwit. You took a job in the army? Well I’m afraid that I’ve always found the type of jarheads that profession attracts to be some of the biggest dullards that I have ever encountered. Congratulations, therefore, as you appear to be the living, breathing embodiment of that stereotype.

Personally I’m proud to have gone from being unable to play an instrument to 5 years later having recorded several CDs, opened for some of my favourite artists (plus others who’ve had hit singles) and gained the respect and praise of Robin Trower for my song writing and playing, thus achieving all I ever wanted to with music. I, however, am equally aware that this means bugger all to most of the population and it’s purely a matter of personal pride. I frankly feel embarrassed touting my wares on here like this and apologise to everyone else for doing so. I only do it reluctantly to make a point. Let’s get one thing straight; nobody cares about your job and they certainly don’t give a flying monkey fuck about your car. Nor should they care about mine or anybody else’s. This isn’t a competition. It’s not a ‘who’s got the biggest cock’-athon, no matter whether you seem to think it is or not. The only reason this thread still exists and you aren’t banned is because everyone is laughing at you.

[Ian Symes]

In all seriousness, it’s true that I don’t like Seb’s personality.

[Joey TORDFC]

I know, you told me. Then I told Nance.

Aw…shit….

P.S. I am an awesome human being, obviously.

[JamesTC]

I rode a camel once.

[Nancy Hemming]

lol dear seb, when have you ever heard of someone asking someone as their best man and they turn it down? :P
does not happen :P hahah but it just made this 10000 times better to find out your “best man” and people you consider close, don’t like you, you’re the one they laugh about behind your back, btw lets see that ugly fat wife of yours :P

oh and then tackle this “P.S (1) ooo sebby your site is dying even more, no new posts no new threads ohh wait wait 1 from harrys other account cloud. Did i mention no new members? That’s a given :) ”

dear joey, lol how did you manage to see yourself off this plane? does the trendiness in the glasses raises the 20/20? and get on that blue hair it screams out hey I’m original and not looking for attention :P

Dear Alex lol that’s it? you’re pathetic. Daddy must be very proud that you ummm opened for some nobody hah but keep that head up one of these days you will be a rock star and shove in my face and his right :)

P.S(1) life is always a big cock competition and guess what, i win that too, got to love being 6’9 ohh wait you people are not even close :)

[Joey TORDFC]

I’ve always wanted to ride a camel, sadly the only thing I’ve achieved in riding is a Chopper.

[Author]

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