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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Dwarf_(2020_Series)

Doug reboots the show with younger actors locked into a six series and three film contract and aggresively syndicates it with first airing exclusivity on Disney+.

Norman whinges about it.

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Red Dwarf has been going downhill since ‘The End’.

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It’s a bit of a mess on the DVD because it’s compressed to hell and it could use a little polishing in terms of grading and bringing up brightness and tempering down colour saturation in some shots but overall, it’s a rich and very interesting picture. I’d say it’s my favourite looking series with VI coming in second because the refitted Starbug is such an interesting set, almost submarine like and full of dials and old keyboards and embossed walls.

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Yes that jarred with me, that Lucas somehow had contempt for the fans or was lazy. As much as some people may dislike the prequels, he put everything he had into them, he did a hell of a lot of foundation work that allowed the FX and production teams to go about their duties without major hitches and it smacks of the fans wanting it one way and feeling put out when the creator of Star Wars decides to go another way and inject politics, world building and a sense of continuity and bring about an overall cohesive episode to episode storyline. I’m not their biggest fans, but the prequels do line up very well alongside each other, there’s a clear arc with Anakin and the Republic and emerging threat of the Sith.

The sequel trilogy smacks of writing a film, setting up questions to be answered and that’s about it. The oft-quoted Abrams mystery boxes are evident in The Force Awakens and instead of Rian answering or continuing those mysteries while bringing in his own ideas, he just takes left-turns and very awkwardly subverts expectations of story and previously set-up plot. It begins with a rejection in Luke just throwing away the lightsaber and ends with some kids looking up into the night sky, what happens in-between has no reflection of what came before, no consequiences in what is happening at that very moment and no nods towards of what may come.

The Rise of Skywalker feels like a salvage and a greatest hits for the previous episodes and it really shouldn’t be. It should be a firm and final resolution of the sequel trilogy and it feels like a tribute much like The Force Awakens. You can’t accuse Revenge of the Sith of being a tribute or a rehash, it’s a firm resolution to the Anakin Skywalker and rise of the Sith and Empire stories.

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Are you saying that there is a cache of hardcore Red Dwarf fans out there who are obsessively critical of at least half of the television show that brought them together and as an extension, whinge about it on a third-rate fan site, literally years after the offending episodes were broadcast?

Because you’d be mad to think that.

Oh look, the abyss is staring back at me.

Nurse!

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Series III was the last of the series shot on the old tube cameras, some likely going back to the first days of colour at the BBC, with IV to VI shot on fancy CCD cameras. The look and atmosphere from the tube cameras gives Series III a very grungy and beautiful feel because they’re populating the sets with more props, the lighting is changing and it feels more lived in. It’s also why the Remastered Series III episodes realllllllllly burst off the screen in terms of colour and contrast because you’re pushing the absolute limits of what the cameras can capture. Compare to Series IV where the image is very clean and precise with no bleeding and trails from overly bright lights in motion.

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A non-field removed Series VII would be a lovely bonus, remove the film effect and it’d sit very nicely between VI and VIII

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This is true, there are 104 people who enjoy Red Dwarf, and 107 that enjoy Star Wars.

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The Last Jedi isn’t unwatchable garbage. It doesn’t sit alongside The Force Awakens as clear a continuation with evident ties as The Empire Strikes Back was to A New Hope but it isn’t as murderously shite as a lot of people like to claim. It feels a lot like a hate race, seeing who can stamp on it the hardest for internet points.

The Force Awakens is camp old nonsense, a spiritual remake of A New Hope and it works well as entertainment because Abrams understands the buoyancy that a Star Wars movie should have. The Last Jedi felt very stilted and broken in places intentionally. The ol’ cliche of subverting expectations was on show there and it feels more like a strange standalone movie.

The Rise of Skywalker seems to invoke The Force Awakens, as an Abrams film and what seems to be a fair nod towards Return of the Jedi.

Alas, it’ll make a ton of cash and in a few years, we’ll all be wanking over Episode X – An Even Newer Hope

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There’s a good dozen episodes from Season 1 and 2 of VOY that are crackers but it doesn’t really kick off until later in Season 3. Season 4 to 6 is top drawer Trek.

I honestly don’t think I’ve watched Season 1 and 2 of DS9 since it first aired.

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JUSTINCE

Elastica make a guest appearance on the prison world

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I really don’t think Voyager should be ported over to HD, it’s a very location and FX heavy show at times and both the sets and FX were tuned to maximise what you could get out of standard definition. TNG works in HD though because it was mostly in camera FX and a lot of dialogue heavy scenes, in HD it really looks powerful and theatrical whereas Voyager always felt like TNG-lite, a more pop version and it look emptier in HD, you’d be more aware it was sets and early digital FX.#

I don’t care for DS9, the Ferengi episodes are great but the rest is muck.

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The Mandalorian is a slow burning and enjoyable half-hour sci-fi drama, the kind of Star Wars I longed for after the admittedly poor sequel movies.

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EVERYONE’S REPEATED, DAVE

Doug Naylor subconsciously rewrites and amalgamates classic scripts and calls them Series XI and XII

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” Earthin’ “

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The live shows are nostalgic, you forget that there’s a good half-hour of material in-between another ninety minutes of humourless shite.

When Ade appeared on Carpool, he didn’t hold back, calling them mostly a load of wank.

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There was a Dwarf episode called Timewave
That reflected the more militant PC and SJW crazes
But it was written by a man in his sixties
Whose cultural sensitivities were exposed as redundant
So we just watched Johnny Vegas rub his nipples instead

These practically write themselves!

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There was a northerner called Rob Grant
When asked to write a seventh series said I surely can’t
So he fucked off and did nothing for years
While claiming royalties, eating pies and drinking beer

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I didn’t have a smartphone until 2012 and I remember for the life of me not knowing Josie Lawrence’s name. It just went out of my head and if I wanted to remember, I’d have to be at home at the PC but I knew it was the lass from Whose Line. Anyway, nowadays I would not only know her name, date of birth, personal life and career highlights instantly but sadly, what her feet look like in a multitude of photos uploaded by weirdos with foot fetishes.

Google doesn’t put that kind of information in the top search results, I guess I must’ve accidentally typed in Wikifeet Josie Lawrence.

No, I’m not alright with that.

Yes, I can live with it.

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It’s a strange evolution of the internet, consolidating celebrity news primarily via Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. Some famous folk had remarkable websites like Thomas Dolby who clearly enjoyed filling it with content. Now most celebrity and movie tie-in sites either go directly to their social media page or haven’t been maintained for years.

The internet is a bit shite now. The content is more diverse as ever but I miss browsing websites that were handbuilt and clearly a labour of love.

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Wasn’t the 4th series written?

Can’t we have the scripts?

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THE ENDER

More former EastEnders stars appear in Red Dwarf and act far too broadly against Craig Charles who has genuinely become a refined and emotive actor over his career.

Oh and Kryten makes a face.

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TITS OOT.

I’m going to use this as a very oblique and pitiful reason to not watch future Who.

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