bloodteller

[bloodteller]

I spent three hours talking to this girl (Sarah) over the phone last night

a 3 hour conversation? your phone bill’s going to be quite big then, unless she paid for the call.

but then either way, that seems like a frightening waste of money when you could have just used Skype or something, which is free.

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>Doctor Who is a show for all ages though…

is it? i honestly thought it was a bit more adult-orientated, but then again i don’t watch much Doctor Who cus i don’t like it very much

i do quite like that movie they did, though. the one set in San Fransisco, with Eric Roberts as the villain. that was a good film, but that aside i could never really get into the show

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>all you guys do is attack the new people

i’m new, i only made an account about 8 months ago and nobody ever attacked me.

and honestly, from my perspective, this thread seems to be mostly friendly banter

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nice going on the idiotic gaffes front, sirs. the new forum member lasted almost a full 5 seconds there!

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can i stop too?

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>I don’t see how they can make them much different with the same footage.

i’d argue the “Every Dog…” edit gives the episode a very different feel, for reasons mentioned in my previous post (e.g. deleted scenes added in so the mirror universe idea isn’t so hideously underdeveloped, the character of Talia entirely removed because nobody liked her tbh) so i’d recommend giving that a watch at the very least. it makes the episode feel more coherent, if nothing else

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“Only the Good…” might’ve been an at least watchable episode of VIII, but the absolute piss-poor editing choices ruin the episode and turn it into the most surreal Red Dwarf episode ever.
there was a fanedit somewhere online called “Every Dog…” and it improved the episode by a clear mile. there was no Talia (who even is she?), the mirror universe was at least explained somewhat instead of it coming out of nowhere, and the original ending was restored, making it a much more complete episode.

so maybe quite a fair bit of VIII’s problems lie in the editing room? there was similarly a fanedit of “Pete” which made the episode at least feel almost like Red Dwarf

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come to think of it, isn’t the logic behind most of Cassandra’s story really fucking broken? she’s trying to get rimmer and kochanski to shag, to punish lister because he kills her. but if she’s a computer that can see the future, she’ll already know that her plan wont work and it won’t punish lister whatsover. so is she just doing the whole thing for a laugh, or what?

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>The three separate opinions joke was never funny

i laughed more when reading the three separate opinions thread than i laughed for the entirety of Series VIII, though

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>a triple polaroid.

is that three separate polaroids combined into one?

also blimey you must be huge

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-Are you really saying Red Dwarf’s gonna blow?

– In less time than it takes Jawscvmcdia to combine three separate opinions into one!

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i have no clue what you were talking about in your second point

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i always used to think that just being a big green blob was her condition tbh, but that cant be right

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-Rimmer, you’ve been combining opinions for eight years. How come you’re so utterly useless?

-Oh, speaks! And how many separate opinions have you combined in your entire life? The same number as Jawscvmcdia the forum poster: three!

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-Forum Post History of Jawscvmcdia. That should be good for a couple of hours.

-Three days without opinions, and the walls of civilization come tumbling down!

-What d’you mean?

-They say that every society is only three separate opinions away from revolution. And it’s true, isn’t it? You haven’t had an opinion for a couple of days, and you’ve turned into a barbarian.

-I’m just combining them into one!

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I’ve come to warn you, after three separate opinions you’ll be dead!
Will I really?
Yes, unless you do something about it now.
Well, what do you suggest, combining them into one?

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39436175880932/B? “All users attending the forum are only allocated one opinion?” Is that entirely relevant sir? I mean, here we are in mortal danger and you’re worried about Jawscvmcdia bringing three separate opinions.

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i’ve never seen it before, no-one has, but i’m guessing it’s 3 separate people’s opinions combined into one.

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the stuff in Camille feels like it actually fits in with the rest of the show though imo. i’m never sat there thinking “well why is this in an episode of red dwarf?” BtE on the other hand, sticks out like a sore thumb because some of the stuff in it doesn’t feel like something i’d ever be seeing in Red Dwarf, e.g. the coronation street scenes.

carbug can fuck off too, what’s that doing there? get rid of it

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it hasn’t exactly changed my outlook on life, but as a consequence of watching Red Dwarf, i now own one of those weird fur hats that Lister wears in V and VI. it keeps your ears nice and warm if you turn the flaps down, but you look a bit of a tit if you do that. so its best to keep the flaps up, really.

oh and also, because i watch Red Dwarf, i now visit this site quite a lot (i’ve been visiting the site since 2012, but i only made an account about a year ago). and i quite like coming onto G&T, its a mostly good website with mostly good people on it. it also makes me laugh sometimes

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personally, i can only ever make it as far as “…why don’t we get Pete to eat some roughage!” before my brain just shuts down

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speaking of, isn’t that bit in VIII where Lister taps morse code on the pipes lifted directly from the Bottom Live show where they go to prison?

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it’s a bit of a weird thing to see on an official red dwarf site, isn’t it? stuff like “Captain Hollister had checked in to deal with his eating disorder – he had been unable to complete the twelve course meal he’d ordered the night before.” and other stuff such as “Bing Baxter, the game show host, is addicted to hamsters. Not sexually, I mean to eat. Can’t get enough of them.” feels less like actual red dwarf stuff, and more like that jokey G&T article about Pete Part 2 where Lister is addicted to horse meat or something

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jesus, just noticed one particular interview has this line: “The London Jets manager? He had those sparky-white teeth forcibly removed one-by-one from a young Mexican boy and then inserted into his own mouth. Apparently he’s still troubled by nightmares and wakes up with the flavour of tacos in his mouth.”

…what?

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some of these interviews are really fucking bizarre, wow. the captain hollister one is just entirely jokes about him being fat and eating a lot. it’s like his characterisation in VIII, only worse

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according to Netflix’s subtitles it’s just “(YELLING)”

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i don’t think that’s a very good idea

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why is Kill Crazy even in any of the episodes after Cassandra? weren’t all the canaries supposed to be dead within one hour during that episode?

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maybe they just have really big windows? but yeah, the scale of the ship seems a bit iffy in X and especially XI.
case in point- http://imgur.com/a/ifHA1 .either starbug is abnormally big or red dwarf is tiny.

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those bits in the Smegazines where an arrangement of ink and text plays him

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that bit in the Backwards audiobook where rob grant plays him

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that bit where hattie hayridge plays him for 3 seasons.

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i suppose that would explain why Future Lister acts like an absolute nob

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>shouldn’t Lister have married Kochanski by now, as per Stasis Leak? Or did that happen offscreen?

all the messing around with time bollocks in episodes like out of time presumably prevented this from happening

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if they do get hit by a Gay Ray, then the real question is- if rimmer and lister fuck, does it count as inter-species sex? because rimmer technically isn’t a human, he’s just sort of a big bit of light

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>It’s not part of canon for me.

but if VIII isn’t canon, then surely X isn’t either? they talk about Only The Good quite a bit in the last episode, and there’s a bunch of Canaries outfits in the airlock in Fathers and Suns.

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the real mystery is how a lager can connected to a bunch of wires can liquify a mirror and turn it into an interdimensional portal

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honestly, i’m quite curious to what the “Earth” episode of VIII would’ve been. from what little it’s talked about in the scriptbook, it seems like it would’ve been at the very least an interesting episode

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the greatest change to VIII remastered will be a really crap CGI prisoner walking past added over the opening scene of Back in The Red Part 1.

in the ensuing making-of documentary, nobody will own up to adding this in.

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the real question is how exactly do they continue to do their jobs if they can’t touch anything? e.g rimmer isn’t going to be able to fiddle with vending machines or fail to repair drive plates, because he needs to be able to touch things with his hands. in the same vein, mcintrye, who’s stated to be the flight co-ordinator, probably wouldn’t be too good at his job after his death.

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doesn’t he also shit himself in Demons and Angels?
they mention in it that he’s been “using his uniform as a temporary latrine”

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well yeah, of course they can’t get 400 extras, but it feels at least a bit dodgy that a prison with 400 inmates only has about 15-20 of them present during a visit from the captain concerning their imminent deaths. like,were the other 380 prisoners just unaware of the fact that the ship was being eaten away at until the microbe began to devour them? thats a pretty grim way to go

the solution to this would have been to not state the prison has 400 inmates in Back in the Red

or better yet, don’t have the prison at all in the series

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i just noticed that in that deleted scene, surely all 400 prisoners would be required to be present to hear about the microbe that will soon kill them? yet in the scene there’s about 15 prisoners there, and none of them really look too bothered about the whole affair

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hollister was probably fed up of rimmer and lister’s wacky japes by the end of series 8, and so leaving them behind was payback for that time they let a dinosaur shit all over him (or whatever it was that happened in Pete)

as for kochanski and the other main characters, they just get left behind for no reason. this is fine though, because they got imprisoned for no reason to begin with.

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maybe the camera blew itself up out of sheer frustration at Lister’s half-arsed cliffhanger explanation

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they COULD’VE used the timedrive to get back to Red Dwarf, but for most of Series VII the characters seem to stop giving a shit about finding the ship at all. they never even mention that they’re even searching for it, and it isn’t even spoken of until Nanarchy (i think?) like even a brief mention that they need to find it would at least be something, but no they just spend the entire series driving around deep space in search of nothing in particular

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“I think the original arc of the movie was to be on Starbug for Act I, find Red Dwarf with a full crew mysteriously enough for Act II and some heroic simulant bashing and saving the ship and the day in Act III”

wasn’t the movie supposed to be an entire reboot of the series though? it was mentioned as being a “non-sequel” several times i think.

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the USA pilot establishes it’s only “going between Earth and Saturn transporting raw materials which are badly needed by someone” so i’m guessing they dont actually need any miners

pic: http://imgur.com/a/4a4j8

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Tikka To Ride would instead be an episode on the assassination of Franz Ferdinand

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LISTER: Cat?
CAT: Mmm?
LISTER: Ya ever see Dear Dave?
CAT: Sure!
LISTER: D’ya think Dispenser 23’s sexy?
CAT: Dispenser 23?
LISTER: Maybe we’ve been alone in deep space too long, but every time I
see that episode, her logo drives me crazy. Is it me?
CAT: Well, I think in all probability, Dispenser 23 is the most
desirable vending machine that ever lived.
LISTER: That’s good. I thought I was goin’ strange.
CAT: She’s incredible!
LISTER: What d’ya think of 34?
CAT: Dispenser 34? …Well, I would go with 34… but I’d be
thinking of 23.

[Author]

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