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  • in reply to: The Classic Doctor Who Thread (1963 to 1989/1996) #252071

    Sorry, just remembered this is meant to be about Classic Doctor Who. Damn.

    in reply to: The Classic Doctor Who Thread (1963 to 1989/1996) #252070

    My young cousins laughed their heads off at the smacked bottom line.

    The bit before the Doctor goes into the TARDIS to regenerate, between his companions disappearing and him going inside, I found that moment poignant. I don’t really know why, and I don’t care to know. The rest of the episode was worth it for that.

    There’s absolutely no need to rag on Darrel.

    in reply to: Almost XIII news #247444

    Drop the enormously successful and expensive Red Dwarf? The BBC did something similar in the 90s, didn’t it?

    Darrell, I agree with you an all accounts. I hope I’m misreading the tone of the replies people have been sending you. They seem aggressive, but I could be inferring a tone which isn’t there. I just want to say your contribution to this forum is always great and I hope people aren’t putting you off.

    Who is in charge of Dave these days? I’ve Googled but too much of an idiot to find the information, I guess.

    I haven’t thought this post through.

    in reply to: How do you solve a problem like Meltdown? #243028

    Thanks for agreeing with me, Ben! Whenever I give an opinion anywhere online I usually get anxious over how it’s going to come across, so it’s nice to feel justified.

    in reply to: How do you solve a problem like Meltdown? #243021

    The Winnie the Pooh bit being all dialogue is infinitely funnier than it being done visually, and I’m pretty sure everyone making it knew this at the time. It’s all about Craig’s delivery.
    I think the matter panel stuff works because it splits them up in a more original way than repeating things from literally the previous series. Plus cool effect for the time. Anyway, it manages to make Rimmer’s brainlessly boring story work better because it can be shoe horned in and yet it comes across as the actual plot of the episode interrupting what “should” be happening, which is Lister and the Cat having no escape from Rimmer’s risk story. It’s a well constructed beginning.

    I’ve kind of always loved Meltdown and, I shit you not readers, I was gutted when I found out how unpopular it is/was. Looking back, it has similar ideas in it to series X-II, and like Jimboid said, it is much broader than something like Dimension Jump or Camille, but it just does them much better. Cured is probably a good example of having an idea close to Meltdown but doing it… not wrongly but certainly less successfully.

    in reply to: Merry Smegmas! #240953

    Merry Christmas, Si. And everyone else! I didn’t get anything Red Dwarf-related, unfortunately, but all the same, hope you are all having, at the very least, the best day of your lives.

    in reply to: Doctor Who – Series 11 #239104

    Also, I entirely agree about the daftness of Kill the Moon being part of the charm. The fact that the show attempts to pull it off is great, even if the attempt fails (note: it didn’t fail for me). I hope the show edges closer to these crazier ideas than it is at the moment. It still seems to me that it’s lacking confidence in itself to do anything too interesting.

    in reply to: Doctor Who – Series 11 #239103

    I really liked Mummy on the Orient Express too, but it did cause one of the two non-family members I know who watch the show to stop. He thought Capaldi’s Doctor was too heartless in it. Not sure if he made it to the end of the episode though. Series 9 I like a lot of, but do find stretches of it intensely boring. The Viking one is one of these boring ones, and it’s a pretty essential watch to get the full impact of the finale, which I love but can understand people being put off.

    Thanks for clarifying the Moffat statement and providing a link, I hadn’t heard his original plans got changed.

    in reply to: Doctor Who – Series 11 #239047

    Where is it said he intended to bow out with The Doctor Falls? I know he was saying he thought The Husbands of River Song was going to be his last while he wrote it, but I’ve never read that he wasn’t intending to do a Christmas special after Series 10.

    I really like the last two-parter of Series 10, personally. The Lie of the Land is utter dross though and the episodes following follow suit until Word Enough and Time. I don’t see anything wrong with 11’s clock tower scene, though.

    I’ve almost caught up with series 11, but haven’t seen the latest. I’ve heard it’s better than the previous episodes though, so hurrah!

    in reply to: Doctor Who – Series 11 #238799

    It’s all been a bit of a shrug for me, seeming like the writers aren’t really sure what they want to do so far. My cousins, though, who are target-audience age, they’re loving it. The youngest walked around Derby the other week quoting the whole bit in Rosa Parks which ends with Ryan saying “that’s good, because I don’t eat them.” This week’s was enjoyable fluff, I just want something more, but I can’t argue with children who say they love it.

    Thanks, I’m glad you got that one, Si. I’d have looked like a nutter otherwise.

    in reply to: Let's Talk About Inside No. 9 Live Episode #238607

    The episode was splendid. My heartiest congratulations to the writer-performers.

    It’s just a big bloody joke to you, isn’t it? Oh, Jawscvmcdia can’t give bad news, Jawscvmcdia is bad news. Jawscvmcdia posts on Ganymede and Titan and loses. His mam said he would win! He’s only eight!

    Danny John-Jules IS one of my loved ones.

    in reply to: Doctor Who – Series 11 #237989

    >Doctor Who is 33% amazing and 66% silly nonsense

    I agree, but the 66% silly nonsense is what makes the 33% amazing.

    But what do I know, I enjoyed that one with Robin Hood. Pure silly nonsense, that was. This new one was a bit po-faced, which is fine. The thing that I didn’t like was any attempt at humour, which fell completely flat for me. That Capaldi one with him running around the castle on his own, I loved that one, and I don’t think there was any humour in that.

    Jodie Whittaker is good in the role but hasn’t had a proper time to shine yet. I’ve seen people comparing her to Matt Smith but I found her very different. She talked fast sometimes, yeah, but she seemed more in control of her performance whereas Smith seemed a lot giddier, usually, which was part of his appeal (I liked Matt Smith a lot). She’s also clearly the most human out of nearly any Doctor (the only way she can top Davison is by doing something even more Doctor-y than sacrificing her life for someone she just met). At first I found it a bit jarring going from Capaldi’s aloofness, but then I realised I actually enjoy the Doctor being actually likeable as well as admirable.

    I’ve said too much. If you’ve read all of this garble, I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry.

    in reply to: What's the most you've laughed at Red Dwarf? #237602

    The episode that dare not speak it’s name? But it’s the Ideal episode.

    in reply to: Would you watch a series with just Rimmer and Lister? #237601

    I avoided making the obligatory Series VIII reference because, even though they are tonally equal, Chuckle Vision is the far superior show at that point.

    in reply to: Would you watch a series with just Rimmer and Lister? #237591

    I would watch a series with just Rimmer and Lister but only if it’s nothing like the Chuckle Brothers or the Two Ronnies. Those aren’t terrible shows, but there are tonally far away from what I want Dwarf to be.
    It would have to be akin to the Derek & Clive album , only with every swear word replaced. “This Goit Came Up to Me”, “You Smegging Goit” and of course the classic “Winkie Smeggy Woo.” It can be called Dave & Arnold (Smegged).

    I am not a professional comedy writer.

    in reply to: What's the most you've laughed at Red Dwarf? #237590

    Oh God, that light switch gag, it’s perfect. I also love “I’ve come to regard you as people…I…met.” It’s a funny line in itself but the fact that it’s Chris Barrie as Rimmer delivering it makes it one of the most hilarious.

    in reply to: What's the most you've laughed at Red Dwarf? #237531

    Read Toxteth O-Grady’s comment again but imagine my username next to it. That’s my post.

    in reply to: Red any funny books lately? #237233

    Three Men in a Boat by Jerome K Jerome is the funniest book I’ve ever read.

    in reply to: What if Red Dwarf VIII had been produced in widescreen? #237232

    The What-If machine is responsible for this thread.

    in reply to: Would you watch a Red Dwarf "reboot" with an all female cast? #236794

    I’ll take your word for it. Pete’s points refute a lot of the criticism I’ve seen online. I found the film unimpressive when I first saw it. I just found it a bit boring, but there’s nothing to be offended by in terms of storytelling. A lot of people are being ridiculous about it. While browsing HMV in Wimbledon there was a guy working there who said to two different customers “they killed Star Wars!” which is a pretty laughable thing to say. At least they took the “last” one out of the hands of the guy who made the fucking Book of Henry.

    I would watch a reboot of Red Dwarf with an all female cast and I thank the creator that I don’t have to cast it.

    in reply to: What if Series 9 had been made immediately after 8? #234979

    Thanks.

    in reply to: What if Series 9 had been made immediately after 8? #234962

    I thought the BBC was no longer interested in the kind of audience Red Dwarf blah blah blah’d? When did that memo go out? I have no fingers to check myself.

    in reply to: I like uniformity! #233814

    I thought the joke wasn’t “missing things are often found behind the fridge”, but the idea of being able to find missing memories anywhere. It’s not observational comedy, more the absurdity of that idea.

    He probably has re-written them in his spare time, but they were still shit so he’s kept it a secret.

    With Cat and Lister being awful dickheads in Backwards, I think it works because they had become teenagers, and all teenagers are awful dickheads. Rimmer’s use of joshing is nothing compared to the phrase “fusspot indeed!” being used in a Red Dwarf book.

    in reply to: Your Unpopular Red Dwarf Opinions #233536

    Cat’s “except for me him and him” is a shit line.

    in reply to: Overseas Edits #232162

    It fit with the rest of the series.

    in reply to: Jokes you don't/didn't get #231503

    Kryten does say “Oh I see, you mean me” afterwards but it’s a bit hard to hear over the audience, who are laughing for some reason.

    in reply to: Mac McTorchwood #227182

    I enjoyed Moffat’s time on Doctor Who. That’s really all that matters to me. The criticisms you’ve posted above don’t bother me at all, I enjoyed Clara’s (from 8 onward, anyway) and Amy’s characterisations, and your points don’t diminish that. I didn’t like the second half of Series 10 a whole lot, especially the Lie of the Land, but my cousins, who are the the right age to be the target audience for the show, loved it.

    By the way, what was that about Mac MacDonald not liking John Barrowman? When I read that I assumed that was going to be the focus of the thread, but maybe I’m the only person who doesn’t know about this.

    in reply to: Quantum Leap Guide Project #214813

    That’ll be all, shambles.

    in reply to: Hitch-Hexers Guide To The Galaxy #214007

    I really liked Dirk Maggs’ Adventures of Sexton Blake, the Batman/Superman plays he did and the first Dirk Gently (his Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul wasn’t so good), but this is definitely unnecessary.

    Enjoyed the first episode very much! I added 15 dollars to the patreon thing, will hopefully be able to add more once I’ve sorted out my finances.

    in reply to: [PLUG] Jump Leads is coming back. #210911

    Brilliant!

    in reply to: So, what do the whipper snappers think of the show… #210675

    I was in HMV with two friends and one of them saw Red Dwarf and described it as great, the other said he thought it was shit. At least now I know who to save in a life-or-death situation.

    in reply to: SUPER SMASH BROTHERS, YOU BASTARDS. #210674

    It’s as good as Smash Bros always is. Do you think the lack of a proper story mode matters? I thought it would, but it’s just as fun as Brawl, possibly more so without having to worry about saving the game.

    The new characters seem to be there for the hell of it, though. Maybe a bit gimmicky having the villager and the like there. Have you played as any of the new ones? Kirby’s the only character I stand a chance of winning the game with and, being a boring person, I stick to what I’m okay with.

    I’d offer a friend code but it’s my sister’s DS.

    in reply to: Thoughts are with Ben…. #210574

    I’m sorry for your loss, Ben. I hope you and your family are doing okay.

    in reply to: Night of the Doctor Minisode #209452

    I believe the idea was that if the TV Movie had taken off they would have done remakes of old stories. I read that…somewhere…

    in reply to: A new PortsCenter Thread: Amiga A-Go-Go #209435

    Don’t have twitter or a youtube account anymore, but wanted to say I enjoyed that Candle Cove episode. I look forward to Season 2!

    in reply to: And Danny John Jules as the voice of the book. #209420

    I’m on Pay As You Go, so I’m not a dickhead! Ha!

    in reply to: 9 Lost Dr Who Episodes found! #209357

    Those are the ones who signed the “Whovian” contract. I escaped that fate by scribbling my name on the “Doctor Who is pretty good” bill.

    in reply to: IT Crowd Series 4 #209312

    I thought the flicking off fit with how the characters are realising that their lives aren’t very realistic. Not an original idea, granted, but done better than when that other sitcom did it recently(ish).

    in reply to: A "Christmas" Miracle! #209304

    The grandma of mine who hasn’t got dementia has just been diagnosed with cancer of the bone. Thanks for that reminder, Tyler, you BASTARD.

    in reply to: What I want for Christmas….. #209289

    Mike Tyson taught you grammar? He just beat the shit out of me.

    I’ll slow clap myself out.

    There should be an audio podcast promoting this consisting of Gary and someone called Clive calling each other cunts while telling taboo-breaking stories. I have no idea what to call it.

    in reply to: Back to Reality #209233

    Pretend I typed that out sarcastically. It makes me look less bad.

    in reply to: Back to Reality #209228

    It may have a brilliant plot with an intriguing idea alongside brilliant jokes, but the fact that the episode implies that Rimmer has forgotten that he had more successful brothers undoes more than the episode, and not just the whole show, but the entire fabric of science fiction. I imagine if they’d remastered the series they’d have fixed this problem.

    If the universe in the episode has been real and the show went in that direction, I’d imagine that Sebastian would’ve been more a middle man who’s allowed to have the illusion of power. Higher than the gun with the moustache, but with higher ups that could easily change him if he did anything out of the ordinary.

    Thinking about it, doesn’t that universe actually exist within the show now, due to the logic set down by Back to Earth?

    I really enjoyed the film, I’m tempted to use the word “immensely” but someone will accuse me of exaggeration. I’m not an exaggerator, it’s one of the many styles I do not have. The most recurring criticism I’ve seen can be summed up as “it’s not like the TV shows, its too much like a film”. I think it was the Financial Times that complained that the plot was very basic and generic, but in my opinion the plot of a movie where the main character is Alan Partridge sort of needs to be. It’s not about what’s going on, it’s about how Alan reacts.

    The last bit with Michael was probably my favourite gag, along with Alan and Pat’s reactions. My favourite thing about the film in general, though, is probably Colm Meaney, but I’m a huge fan of his anyway because of the Barrytown trilogy films.

    And DS9, probably.

    in reply to: Doctor number 12 incoming Sunday #208959

    “He said sorry, lads. Well just to show there’s no hard feelings, here’s one on the house.

    Now about this Great Fire of London…”

    in reply to: Worlds End #208879

    I completely agree with Seb on this matter, which makes him right.

    in reply to: VOGANS SEND BIRTHDAY SALUTATIONS TO IAN #208774

    I’m sure Pete has at least one more surprise waiting for you up his sleeves or, uh, somewhere else.

    in reply to: Google search terms #208740

    Oh great, now every time I eat cat litter I’m going to be worrying about my health.

    in reply to: A Bit Of a Chat with Ken Plume & Doug Naylor #208339

    He does spend an inordinate amount of time laughing, yes, more often than not at his own jokes. All the podcasts I’ve heard I’ve found interesting enough, though.

    in reply to: And now a game everybody at G&T can enjoy… #208327

    Seriously, no one’s going to mention the bunny outfit?

    in reply to: Iany S #208299

    I do it well, thank you! My name is Dave but I’m not sure if I’ve ever said that on here. I think I was still a teen when I registered and never bothered introducing myself because I was a scrabbling cunt back then.

    But never mind about that, tell me more about your grandma’s wardrobe.

    in reply to: And now a game everybody at G&T can enjoy… #208190

    Just in time for my Grandma’s 90th birthday. Ta!

    in reply to: Question for those who saw an episode (or more) filmed #208184

    On G&T?! Don’t talk rot!

    I couldn’t really fit a subtle typo into this one. If I had, it would’ve been legendarily hilarious.

    in reply to: Danny S #208181

    I missed the boat here, but I’m waving a little flag from the dock with “congratulations” scrawled on it in the most enormous handwriting.

    in reply to: The Name of The Doctor #208035

    How odd; most comments I’ve seen from fans have been along the lines of “they must honour people who have been following the show religiously and not sell out (sigh) to a possible new audience”. I agree more with you, though. Maybe it will be more accessible anyway, seeing as the Name of the Doctor did some of the fan service people wanted from the 50th anniversary.

    in reply to: The Name of The Doctor #207995

    Personally, I loved this episode and I liked this year’s batch of episodes overall, to be honest. I know it’s not popular opinion or anything, but there hasn’t been an episode that I’ve felt was a total loss. Yes, even that Rings one that everyone seems to hate. Though I do hope River’s gone for good, yes. “Goodbye, sweetie” is a good final line for her.

    in reply to: Johnny H #207980

    Are we meant to say it in a different language each time? Oh… well, ‘appy birthday, mate!

    That was cockney.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207870

    Yes, yes, we’re all very frightened of you, you win, you have a big cock, etc. Now, off you fuck.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207864

    > Usually I would not wish harm on anyone, but I’ve been hit by a bus before. It’s something I dearly think needs to happen to you. I don’t want you to die. However, if your ability to use a computer will be impaired, then I think that would make a lot of people happy.

    #justprayin

    in reply to: The Name of The Doctor #207825

    I was seeing Bill Bailey’s Qualmpedller at the time (which, by the way, was excellent), but I’ve caught up and yes, it was brilliant, though one of the people I watched it with did immediately say, “well that was a bit naff” as soon as the credits started rolling. Takes all sorts, I suppose.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207822

    Heh, Nancy wins at life because he is a big cock.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207671

    What have you accomplished, btw? I mean, you said before sgtsmiley has done more for Red Dwarf than any of us put together. Did he watch it harder than any of us, or something?

    in reply to: Sebby P #207670

    You’re a very funny little man.

    in reply to: Worlds End #207599

    I had no idea it was going to be as gory as it turned out to be, no. I’m expecting it this time, so maybe World’s End will be entirely devoid of blood. I wouldn’t bet on it though.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207572

    Ah, it’s that old “reply to an insult by spouting utter bollocks in the hopes that it may seem witty” trick.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207566

    She’s still crap at oral sex, though.

    in reply to: I Committed a Red Dwarf Atrocity #207560

    Well, I liked it…

    in reply to: Sebby P #207556

    And to think, yesterday I thought there could be nothing more ridiculously stupid as that fight between Doctor Who and Star Wars fans.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207552

    You’re a bloody puppet!

    in reply to: Sebby P #207548

    I’m sorry for your loss.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207544

    AND MY AXE.

    Also, my sister.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207541

    Hello Boz!

    in reply to: Sebby P #207527

    I’m so confused. Nancy has not been wronged, isn’t angry, and has apparently won, so why the complaining?

    in reply to: Sebby P #207513

    Uh, ignore the way I capitalised the wrong word there. Not that anything going on in this thread is in any way important…

    in reply to: Sebby P #207512

    “and you say it IS to ensure people are posting? you forgot it’s only like 6 people and harry being 8 people in years right? :)”

    Nope, he said it’s his job to ensure those THAT are posting to stick to the rules. The number of people is irrelevant.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207504

    Uh, I just registered on TOS. Wasn’t altogether hard.

    in reply to: Sebby P #207495

    Yeah, that’s the thing about people with friends. They have back up. It’s awful.

    in reply to: Worlds End #207461

    Meh, I found Hot Fuzz funnier than Shaun of the Dead, but I guess that comes down to personal taste. The over-the-top style of the gorier parts of HF made it work for me.

    in reply to: PLOTS FOR SERIES 11 #207298

    If they don’t have every version of Rimmer in the 50th Anniversary special then fuck Naylor and his giant ego for betraying the fans.

    in reply to: A thread for non-DJers. #207109

    A family member is in the hospital with a serious case of The Shits. More interesting than my weekend of playing boggle with myself. And that’s not even a euphemism. Believe me, I wish it was. It would be more interesting than my weekend of ambiguous declarations.

    in reply to: Anyone going to Wales Comic Con then? #207026

    > I made a complete dick of myself in front of Chris and Robert last time

    Years ago I went with my mum and brother to that Collectormania in Manchester when Simon Pegg and Nick Frost were promoting Hot Fuzz. At the end of their talk my mum ran up to Frost, who was handing out T-Shirts and coo’d “Helloooooo”, and he looked down at her from the stage and coo’d “Helloooooo” right back at her.

    I think the moral of my story is that if we don’t make dicks of ourselves in front of celebrities, our mothers will do it for us.

    As for why we went with our mum… well, she kind of bought the tickets. Would’ve been downright rude to leave her at home.

    in reply to: Things found through Red Dwarf Google Alerts… [2] #206977

    Um…subverted. Damn, ruined a post with my own hasty fingers and lack of reviewing whatever it is I’m writing AGAIN.

    in reply to: Things found through Red Dwarf Google Alerts… [2] #206976

    Kermo-Kermo-Kermo-Kermo-Kermodeisashit.

    To the tune of “What a Wonderful World”.

    Because expectations are made to be inverted.

    in reply to: Norm’s post-Dwarf tell-all #206926

    I feel hurt and a warmth in my heart at the same.

    I….I have heartburn?

    in reply to: Norm’s post-Dwarf tell-all #206922

    If we need someone new to bitch about, let me be the first to volunteer as the target.

    in reply to: Television Centre Closure #206821

    I triple-dog-dare you to try some ketchup wine, Mabel.

    in reply to: Google guide to the galaxy #206691

    I haven’t read And Another Thing, but I’m glad that Mostly Harmless’ ending isn’t the official last word anyway. Was far too bleak for my liking.

    in reply to: Being Human axed #206153

    I watched up to episode five. I enjoyed what I saw, I wouldn’t say it lacked wit, and the last episode I saw ended on an interesting cliffhanger. Didn’t really grip me though. Though, that’s the same with Misfits. I think I just came along too late to both shows and I don’t have the drive to catch up.

    > I might start watching.

    You might start watching, not because of what is on but what ISN’T?

    in reply to: Red Dwarf is Back on Netflix Streaming, but… #205964

    I was going to make a comment on Pete Part Three, but I don’t I’m good enough friends with him to call him a knob without actual offence being taken. So I won’t.

    in reply to: SON OF CLICHÉ ALERT #205953

    NOW things are heating up.

    in reply to: DEAR GANYMEDE & TITAN COMMUNITY #205926

    Embrace your desires, Jason. It’ll make it so much more bearable.

    in reply to: DEAR GANYMEDE & TITAN COMMUNITY #205916

    You say that, but when you touch yourself at night, that’s the face you’re making.

    in reply to: Alex's Bottom #205864

    This opening sentence of my post is an attempt at making a pun-ish thing about how Alex Ferguson is an arse.

    But I agree with Newsome! Ta for the article!

    in reply to: Gerry Anderson. #205509

    Everyone has AIDS! AIDS AIDS AIDS!

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