flanl3

[flanl3]

Neat.

[flanl3]

BEYOND A POKE

Lister bemoans his inability to develop deep romantic relationships that go further than just shallow sex.

THANKS FOR THE FORGETTERY

In the process of erasing Rimmer’s memory of Lise Yates, he somehow also erases his own.

HANG ON A FUCKING SECOND I HAVE A THREAD I NEED TO START

[flanl3]

It’s Virgin that’s the problem, not the BBC or UKTV.

Yes, I’m well aware, but I’m more just wondering why the BBC wouldn’t throw their weight around a little more on this issue. Surely they could threaten to cut their channels from Virgin at the next possible opportunity and the whole debate would be done in about three seconds flat.

I’m also American, so am probably confused about how that shit works.

[flanl3]

What if Virgin Media had produced Red Dwarf?

[flanl3]

I’ve just gotten through the second series – starting 3 immediately, can’t wait to see how Lister being a dad shifts the show’s dynamic.

[flanl3]

Surely BBC could be doing a little more about this themselves since they do own, you know, half of UKTV.

[flanl3]

A Risk campaign diary.

[flanl3]

Well, it probably is de javu. It sounds like it.

[flanl3]

That machine from Timewave that makes people gay.

[flanl3]

THE TROYS FROM THE DWARF

After finally finishing his Iliad graphic novel twenty years later, Lister encourages everybody to join him in a reenactment, which is an idea that falls flat as soon as they all realize that nobody wants to play the horse.

[flanl3]

Shoes.

[flanl3]

It’s weird to think about, but VI really does take place over just a couple of weeks, maybe a month, doesn’t it? From the characters’ perspective, of course, not on an absolute timeline.

[flanl3]

I’d actually say that tense shift is somewhat valid.

[flanl3]

We’re all buying this just to prove that Jawscvmcdia needs to stop making threads, right?

[flanl3]

The rule is about unquarantined animals. They were probably running tests on dogs down in that science lab tbh

[flanl3]

I nominate this thread for Hall of Shame status

I believe that’s called the Hall of Fame.

[flanl3]

Why didn’t you ask him not to write Timewave?

[flanl3]

Craig All Holes

[flanl3]

“Ala”

A la, even.

[flanl3]

The Skutters repainted over the 3 million years. They were bored, and lucky to be hiding in their filing cabinet at the right time.

[flanl3]

Rimmer wasn’t a hologram in the fireball universe.

[flanl3]

There’s still a mostly untapped market with complaining about really old Red Dwarf, too.

[flanl3]

Well, is Cadmium-II even real? If not, they can make up whatever properties they want for it. Also, the one in Skipper could hypothetically be a slightly different substance.

[flanl3]

Dick Crazy
Ziggy Likesmen
Anal Fiddler
Dispenis Machine 23
Tight Wank Tony

[flanl3]

HATTIE HAYRIDGE: Arrested for allegedly setting fire to DJXXI, eating Doug Naylor, wearing a black turtleneck, and spray-painting “i fucked your mum” on Norman Lovett’s window.

[flanl3]

He was given an extra appendix due to faulty atomic reconstruction every time they used the paddle in Rimmerworld.

[flanl3]

I am not a massive fan of blades or running, myself.

[flanl3]

Have the accident end the first series. Have Lister go into stasis as punishment and make that seem like the final moment, then suddenly watch fireballs and explosive winds take down the corridors and everybody’s gone, final shot of Lister’s face behind all this madness.

[flanl3]

Only if every character was played by Ron Jeremy.

[flanl3]

I don’t believe you’re the Hall of Fame curator.

[flanl3]

If you want to see Red Dwarf live, get tickets to be in the studio audience when the new series starts filming.

You make it sound so easy.

[flanl3]

But you did do that

I’d like to nominate this post for Hall of Fame status.

[flanl3]

Shit, I should probably have put Skipper last

[flanl3]

I’ll need to come back to this later, but for now:

Timewave
Flaketron – Timewave II
Emophase – Timewave III
Ziggy’s Pansexual Orgy – Timewave IV
Please Don’t Be Mean To Nazis – Timewave V
Damn Kids These Days, Get Off My Well-Kept Fucking Lawn – Timewave VI
I’m Going to Harass Other People If I Feel Like It Because Free Speech™ – Timewave VII
Poor Me, An Old White Guy – Timewave VIII

[flanl3]

thanks for that incredible insight

[flanl3]

URUOBOARUSS

The users on a Red Dwarf fansite struggle to spell the name of Series VII’s defining episode correctly even once.

[flanl3]

Uh oh, not a man with taste, not around here

[flanl3]

Is XIII taking so long to get officially confirmed because UKTV want to see decent scripts before commissioning so they don’t waste money on Flaketron – Timewave II?

[flanl3]

I honestly think Doug should have thrown enough shit at the wall to write 16 scripts for XI/XII then picked the best twelve and either set aside or throw away the worst ones. That’s how we avoid Timewave. So yeah, I’d support picking the best 8 out of 12 if he were to use that process, but he wouldn’t.

[flanl3]

Your opinion is utter shit.

[flanl3]

Did nobody read my comment? Five strawberries/wk could obviously be reached with 10 strawberries every two weeks – it’s an average, not completely literal “exactly five strawberries every single week”

[flanl3]

SPACE CHORDS SELECTION

The long-awaited sequel to the Series VI DVD extra “Settling the Score”.

[flanl3]

Why don’t they just triplicate a whole fucking pile of strawberries though?

[flanl3]

If they just keep triplicating high strawberries, they only get one high strawberry and no low, so five is reachable.

Another possible conclusion is that the machine can run about 5 times every 14 days, averaging to 5 new strawberries/week.

[flanl3]

No dimension jumping required by our crew. All the pods did it automatically.

[flanl3]

…to be clear, I was proposing that the graveyard is in our Dwarfers’ dimension, since that’s the universe that Ace’s first space adventure took place in. No dimension jumping required.

[flanl3]

It’s the dimension of Ace Rimmer’s first space adventure. And they went back into deep sleep to follow the coffin.

[flanl3]

BETTER THAN COMBINING THREE DON’T ESCAPES INTO ONE

I enjoyed it enough to play the other 2 Escapen’ts, and then I went on to play another bunch of games because why not?

[flanl3]

I like the bit from Officer Rimmer where he eats popcorn out of a microwave then has a whole game show memorized from watching it so many times

[flanl3]

Well where do you think he learned all the English from

[Author]

Replies