flanl3

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FUCK Craig

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Tankwave

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Was Rimmer maybe not trying to destroy the time drive, but instead blow up the ship, so that if the timeline did reset he wouldn’t be there because he couldn’t stand to take the responsibility for the death of a whole crew a second time?

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Maybe Kryten’s plan was to jump back ten minutes and catch them unaware by blasting them out of the sky just to increase the paradox a little

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Holly?

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What if they cut away from a brief clip of the fictional animated show?

Like they did in Back in the Red?

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Pete Part 2 – One of Our Dinosaurs is Missing

EPILOGUE:

The second dinosaur, not as bright as the first one, hid in Lister’s clean sock drawer and died of old age.

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Lister: You forgot the last item on that list!

Rimmonster: What’s that?

Lister: Fuck my arse we’re on the last page of the script!

IT’S COLD OUTSIDE THERE’S NO KIND OF

This one would’ve been funnier if it had been “Doug: Fuck my arse we’re on the last page of the script!”, wouldn’t it

This one would’ve been funnier if Rimmonster had fucked Lister’s arse, wouldn’t it

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Well it’s all from the POV of the camera, isn’t it?

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Wait, is that Marooned story true?

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Wait is that the actual word

What the fuck Howie

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wat

wat

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TALKIE LISTER: Would you like the last thing you’re going to be doing?

RIMMONSTER: NO DYING!!!!!!!!!!

IT’S

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RIMMONSTER: Open it! Open it! I want to see what the last thing I’ll be doing is!

LISTER OPENS THE POD, AND PULLS OUT THE ETERNAL ENDLESS VOID, HOLDING IT UP IN THE WINDOW. RIMMONSTER MAKES A FACE OF PRIDE THAT SLOWLY MORPHS INTO DISGUST.

IT’S COLD OUTSIDE, THERE’S NO KIND OF

RIMMONSTER: It’s dying!

ATMOSPHERE, I’M ALL ALONE,

RIMMONSTER: It’s smegging dying!

MORE OR LESS, LET ME LIE

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Milder on the Orient Express

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To be clear, the Dennis the doughnut boy line doesn’t actually mean that Captain Hollister’s real name is Dennis, right?

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Wait a minute. What if all of Can of Worms was just Cat’s wet dream?

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RIMMER: This is just a dream, isn’t it?
RIMMONSTER: Yep. But that doesn’t mean you can’t still enjoy it.

RIMMER THINKS.

RIMMER: Alright. Pipe me!

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Marks & Spencer

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With or without the Christmas bit?

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But surely if the parents had a child because they wanted to have a child then its mission would be complete upon being born, at which point it would disintegrate.

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I just throw up if I eat rice.

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I occasionally still sit up with a start with a sudden rage because I’ve remembered that Timewave exists, but that’s mostly not because it’s offensive, just that it’s utter shit and I’d rather spend an evening smelling my own farts than watching it once.

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Who has has a Red Dwarf dream?

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There ARE examples of pamtomimey acting in I-VI (jeep… sleep), but they are much fewer and father between.

…your father is dad?

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I once knew this guy called Jaron and he was a prick so I assume the inquisitor is called Jaron

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And since somebody asked, the dream I had where Rimmer kept growing breasts had a fairly ominous laugh track.

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I had a dream last week that I searched “Red Dwarf 1301” on YouTube and it was actually there and it was really sad and the last five minutes were just a bunch of sad clips – starving children, dying animals, freeway traffic, burning forests – stitched together to some sad music.

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Give & Take: After much debating, Cat finally gets tricked into filling Lister’s hole, before it’s discovered that Cat’s incapable of such and Lister will have to fill it himself.

“Lister offers Cat his hole, and when Cat is unable to fulfill his desires, he sets out to do it himself” is perhaps a bit more to the point.

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Honestly, of the first five the only one I really got into was #3, but they’ve got a number of really fantastic ones under a sort of “start here” section on their website if you’re looking for some better ones.

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Well that’s racist, rude to short people, and a lot of women.

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Reply All is a fantastic podcast.

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What do you use the second bunk for?

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COLÓN:

lol geddit cuz it’s idea number 1492 lol

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COLON:

An episode shot entirely within Pete’s bowels.

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Would you listen to a Red Dwarf podcast?

Would you eat a Red Dwarf sandwich?

Would you visit a Red Dwarf abstract art exhibit?

Would you spend a day at a Red Dwarf theme park?

Would you go on a date with Red Dwarf?

Would you build a Red Dwarf house?

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What would the plot of Fathers & Suns have been? Lister drinks himself into calcium poisoning while recording a video?

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*Cat shakes the invisible bottle of milk vigorously before opening it. Upon removing the lid, like a single drip of milk splashes out.*

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Forum, do you copy? This is flanl3. It appears John Squirmy Deere has possessed another soul. This one calls himself Ben. We’ll need major backup in here now if we expect to make it out alive. Over.

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KILLICRAZIA:

The crew get abducted by a ship full of rogue Kill Crazies. Kill Crazy gets to lead a life in near-paradise, while the rest of the crew are uploaded into Kill Crazy bodies and are forced to carry out all the tasks they ever made Kill Crazy do, all while slowly turning more and more into Kill Crazy.

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but Lister and Crass Andrea just spit on him

THREESOME: CRASS ANDREA II

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BRENT

Kryten makes himself a new penis and gives it a name, but is it a flaccid Brent?

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FINE DAVE

If you insist.

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That is pretty much the plot from Can of Worms, right?

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HARD & SOFT

Rimmer’s light bee malfunctions and he suddenly returns to soft-light. He has a lot of trouble getting hard again. Ha.

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FOURTH TECHNICIAN:

The JMC create a new rank and Lister is immediately demoted to it and all of a fansite freaks out because does this mean that Rimmer is now over two men

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So has everybody else, if we want everything to look and feel exactly the same as I-VI.

Especially Norman.

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Why, in Cured, were the crew baffled that four people could be brought back when they literally witnessed it happening to 1167 people?

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Whenever I’m in a Red Dwarf discussion space apart from here or TOS, my rule of thumb is always that anybody who calls Back to Earth “9” or “IX” is not worth listening to or trying to talk to.

Please don’t ruin that for me.

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Perhaps the leak/experiment gone wrong knocked out the holodisk recording system. Before the leak, it was recording constantly, so Lister’s last backup was as he entered stasis. The reason why he did his routine from The End in M-Corp is probably just because that’s what he does to annoy Rimmer when he’s 23, it wasn’t a one-time thing.

[Author]

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